Clare De Graaf's Blog, page 33

Would Jesus Own a Handgun?

The subject of guns is a touchy one for Christians. Our feelings about them are often wrapped up with a love for hunting, concern about second amendment rights, as well as personal security. So, let’s take two of the three off the table. I believe in the constitutional right to bear arms and in the hunting of animals that are eaten, or are hazardous to humans or farm animals. (Frankly, I can’t imagine Jesus would think killing living things, just for the fun of it, acceptable.) But, I can’t prove that by the Bible.

But, the question before us today is, would Jesus own a handgun for personal protection? Setting aside the fact that he was, and is God and needed no protection, it’s more helpful to ask this question, “Would Jesus condone followers of his, owning a gun for the protection of one’s family?”

I also want to say upfront, that I have friends who are serious followers of Jesus, loving, kind and deeply spiritual who own handguns for personal protection. This is an issue on which serious Christians can disagree. But, I do not own a gun for personal protection and never have and I’ll tell you why shortly. (I do own a shotgun to shoot skeet occasionally, but it’s locked away and I don’t hunt.)

Does the Bible Permit Divorce for Abuse?

As an elder, I’ve seen an alarming trend the last 20 years, it’s the number of Christian women divorcing their husbands for verbal, emotional or physical abuse. The scripture they quote most often as justification for a divorce is this one.

“To the rest I say this (I, not the Lord): If any brother has a wife who is not a believer and she is willing to live with him, he must not divorce her. And if a woman has a husband who is not a believer and he is willing to live with her, she must not divorce him. But if the unbeliever leaves, let it be so. The brother or the sister is not bound in such circumstances; God has called us to live in peace.” 1 Corinthians 7:12-13, 15

They’ve concluded that one or more of these things are true of their husbands;
1. He is, or may be an unbeliever as evidenced by his abuse. Therefore divorce is permissible.
2. He has already emotionally abandoned his wife, even if he’s still living in the home.

(While there are cases of abuse by wives, 95% of the abuse I’ve seen is by men against women. Therefore, I’ve written this blog in that vein.)

So, let’s try to examine this issue from both a biblical and human points of view.

Eternal Security and Assurance of Salvation Are Two Different Things

I rarely blog on strictly theological issues, but on Monday I posted a blog on why I’m so hesitant to ask people to pray “the prayer” of salvation, anymore, until I’m confident they understand what and who they’re about to commit their lives to. And, one of the reason why I don’t, is due to the misunderstanding between the doctrine of eternal security (once saved-always saved) and the promise we make people that if they do pray the prayer, they can know without a doubt that they are saved (assurance of salvation).

All of us would like to have assurance of our salvation. But the question all Christians ask of themselves, if they’re honest, “How can I know, or can anyone know, if they’re really saved for sure?”

Why I’m Hesitant to Ask People to Pray “The Prayer” Anymore

When I came to real faith almost 35 years ago, Billy Graham was in his prime and Bill Bright, the founder of Campus Crusade, was leading people to Christ in elevators. Evangelicals used little booklets like The Four Spiritual Laws and Steps to Peace to introduce people to Christ. The last step of course was to pray out loud a short prayer acknowledging your sin, receiving Jesus as your personal Lord and Savior, and thanking him for your salvation – “The Prayer”.

So why is it I’m so cautious about asking people to pray the prayer?

Because, even 30 years ago, most people knew the basic storyline of the Bible, including Adam and Eve’s decision to sin. The majority of Americans had gone to Sunday School or church, or their parents had, so there was a general awareness of sin and God’s displeasure with it. And they also knew that Christians believed Jesus died to save us from our sins.

Nobody is exactly sure what happened, but today I find very few non-Christians, especially those under 40, who believe they are sinners and therefore that they have a problem with God. Either they’re indifferent to God, or if they believe in God at all, don’t think they have a problem with him. Guys can be living with their girlfriends and aren’t the least bit ashamed to tell me. The purpose of this blog isn’t to whine about how that happened, but it did!

So, here’s the problem for them and the dilemma for the church: If you don’t know you’re a sinner, you have no need for a Savior!

This Thanksgiving, You May Be Thanking God for Something He May Not Want You to Have

More than 30 years ago, the editor of our denominational magazine ruined Thanksgiving for many of us. His editorial made these observations;

Some of you will sit down at Thanksgiving dinner with your family and thank God for your cottage, second home, motor home and healthy investment portfolio. Yes, it’s true you have been blessed. But are you sure God wants you to have all these things? It is true that God gave you the ability, skills, intelligence, discipline and work ethic to make the income needed to possess them. But is that the reason God entrusted you with wealth?

Could it be that you’ve actually deprived the poor, or hungry, or sick of resources entrusted to you? There may be people right in your town, this very day, unable to thank God this Thanksgiving because their apartment is cold, or they’re living under an over-pass or don’t know God at all, because you have “their rent” or utility money tied up in stuff God didn’t actually intend for you to have?

“If anyone has material possessions and sees a brother or sister in need but has no pity on them, how can the love of God be in that person?” 1 John 3:17

“Our desire is not that others might be relieved while you are hard pressed, but that there might be equality. At the present time your plenty will supply what they need, so that in turn their plenty will supply what you need. The goal is equality, as it is written: ‘The one who gathered much did not have too much, and the one who gathered little did not have too little.’” 2 Corinthians 8:13-15

Be careful what you thank God for this Thanksgiving.

There were angry people who wrote letters to this editor, accusing him of being a socialist or worst yet in our conservative town, a democrat! Others thought he had no right judging anyone with any extra money. But I, a rich young ruler at the time was profoundly moved.

The “Compound Interest” of an Unforgiving Spirit

Last week, after speaking at a conference, a woman approached me troubled with one of my teachings in my book, The 10 Second Rule. The chapter she took issue with is entitled, Love the One You’re With. In it, I said that although we won’t always, “like” those we serve, we’re still commanded to be kind and generous to everyone, even our enemies.

She said her enemy is her mother. Apparently, her mother was and is, cold and controlling, and with the holidays coming up, as she said “I’m getting the sweats just thinking about spending two days with her without getting emotionally cornered. Are there some people just too toxic to “like” or be around?” she asked.

To her relief, I said “yes, there are toxic people who you do have the right to keep at a distance. However, I’d be interested in hearing why she’s still so toxic for you after 30+ years of living outside her home.” I wanted to hear what she’s done to try to heal this relationship or put proper boundaries on it.

Her answer reminded me of this principle I’ve observed in myself and others, we want mercy from God for ourselves, but justice for those who’ve hurt us.

I’m grateful God doesn’t take the same attitude with me.

Teaching Your Children What it Means to be Created in the Image of God

Papa, do we (humans) look like God?

That question came up a number of years ago as I was driving with a few of our grandchildren. We were talking about the recent birth of a new cousin. I had reminded them that all humans were created in the image of God. My answer surprised them, as it does many Christians.

“No, we don’t look like God,” I said. “That’s not what the Bible means when it says that we were created in the image of God.”

So, what follows is the framework for a discussion you may want to have with your children or grandchildren about the amazing distinction between humans and animals, often blurred in movies and fiction.

Don’t Let Your Right Hand Know What Your Left Hand is Doing

In the last month, I’ve been on the campuses of three Christian colleges. I noticed that every one had buildings named after their donors. I was immediately reminded of Jesus words in Matthew.

“Be careful not to practice your righteousness in front of others to be seen by them. If you do, you will have no reward from your Father in heaven. So when you give to the needy, do not announce it with trumpets, as the hypocrites do in the synagogues and on the streets, to be honored by others. Truly I tell you, they have received their reward in full. But when you give to the needy, do not let your left hand know what your right hand is doing, so that your giving may be in secret. Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you.” Matthew 6:1-4

So, how do Christian institutions justify putting the names of donors on buildings or publicly identifying a major donor of a lead gift, when Jesus clearly says, do not do that!

The answer is obvious. Christian colleges, ministries and even churches encourage donors to name buildings, athletic fields or scholarships because they can raise more money if they do. It works!

So, let’s talk about how some have tried to justify this fundraising gimmick and what you can do to discourage it.

Is Bankruptcy Scriptural?

My father declared personal bankruptcy when I was a child. However, I grew to respect my parents even more when I learned how they handled themselves through this difficult time.

Many Christians feel guilty, or have been made to feel guilty by others over filing for bankruptcy protection. They feel guilty because the perception is that they ran up large debts on their credit cards and now are unable to pay back the money to their creditors. The truth is most personal bankruptcy is due to job loss, or uninsured medical expenses beyond their ability to control. And, many believe the Bible condemns bankruptcy. It’s important for us to define what is meant by the term “bankruptcy”; then, we can critically examine what the Bible tells us.

Wisely, those who governed us, many years ago, viewed the “debtors prison” ideas as clearly unchristian. So instead, under U.S. law, a debtor may receive a discharge of debts in a Chapter 7 bankruptcy once every eight (8) years. The Bible, likewise, contains debt forgiveness laws. Under Biblical law, the release of debts came at the end of seven (7) years.

“At the end of every seven years you shall grant a release of debts. And this is the form of the release: Every creditor who has lent anything to his neighbor shall release it; he shall not require it of his neighbor or his brother, because it is called the LORD’s release” Deuteronomy 15:1-2

Justice says that if you agree to borrow money and repay the debt, you must pay it back. But, the law of mercy allows those who cannot pay debt, to obtain forgiveness for their obligations through bankruptcy.

Another guiding principle of U.S. bankruptcy law is one that requires persons who file for bankruptcy to have “clean hands.” Accordingly, a debtor may not be freed from debts involving fraud, drunk driving, and deliberate wrongdoing. Moreover, bankruptcy law does not allow the discharge of child support and alimony debts. Further, most student loans, taxes (Romans 13:1, 4, 7) and secured loans are not forgiven in bankruptcy. Through these restrictions, bankruptcy laws seek to balance justice and mercy (Proverbs 1:3).

I believe the biblical wisdom would permit bankruptcy for the following reasons:

Having thoughtful Discussions with older Children About War

With ISIS in the headlines and reports of thousands of Iraqis fleeing for their lives, it’s an appropriate time to have a conversation with your older children about how Christians should think about war. St. Augustine and later Thomas Aquainis formulated what has been called, the Just War Theory, arguing that some wars are morally justified. In doing so they laid down the principles that ought to guide Christians before going to war.

Their task was a challenge. Critics seem to have on their side the very teachings of Jesus himself, “Love your enemies. Turn the other cheek,” and “thou shall not kill,” teachings that seem incompatible with any form of defiance or violence.

But Augustine argued that God judges the heart. The highest motivation for every act or thought must be love. Therefore, what is done from love, to bring about justice, must be good. That opened the door for Christians to perform outward acts that might appear to be forbidden by scripture.

So, what follows is a brief summary of this Just War Theory.