Sherry Ellis's Blog, page 137
August 25, 2011
Back to School
It was strangely quiet in the house today. The kids went back to school. My son just entered the first grade, so it was the first time I had a whole day without kids.
So, when my kids came home they asked, "Were you bored, hanging out at home all by yourself?"
"Heck, no!" I said. I proceeded to go down the entire list of things I did.
"Wow!" they said. They couldn't believe I actually had that much to keep me busy.
"Yeah, and this is all the stuff I usually try to do when you're home. Pretty amazing, isn't it?"
I could tell that they were impressed. Maybe now I'll get a little respect!
So, when my kids came home they asked, "Were you bored, hanging out at home all by yourself?"
"Heck, no!" I said. I proceeded to go down the entire list of things I did.
"Wow!" they said. They couldn't believe I actually had that much to keep me busy.
"Yeah, and this is all the stuff I usually try to do when you're home. Pretty amazing, isn't it?"
I could tell that they were impressed. Maybe now I'll get a little respect!
August 24, 2011
Horsefly Protection
A rogue horsefly entered our house when we opened the door today. This sent a wave of panic through all of the kids in the house (mine plus a couple of guest kids).
"Help, a horsefly!" they cried.
My son immediately went into the basement to get into his horsefly protection gear.
When he came back upstairs, he was wearing his Incredible Hulk mask, baseball helmet, and plastic knight armor.
"I'm fully protected," he announced.
"Yeah, me too," I said wielding a can of Raid.
That fly doesn't have a chance!
"Help, a horsefly!" they cried.
My son immediately went into the basement to get into his horsefly protection gear.
When he came back upstairs, he was wearing his Incredible Hulk mask, baseball helmet, and plastic knight armor.
"I'm fully protected," he announced.
"Yeah, me too," I said wielding a can of Raid.
That fly doesn't have a chance!
August 21, 2011
Rolling Along
My seven-year-old son isn't the best about cleaning up after himself. For example, when he takes a bath, there's usually a dark ring around the tub and clothes left on the bathroom floor. We've been trying to remind him to clean up so others don't have to deal with his slobbery.
This evening, after he had taken his bath, my daughter questioned him about whether or not he had cleaned up.
"Did you clean the bathtub?"
"I cleaned up my clothes."
"Did you clean the bathtub?"
"Well, I didn't have time because I cleaned my clothes."
Then the daddy got in the game. "So, is that a yes or no answer?"
"Um, no."
Then my husband turned to my daughter. "Go clean the bathtub."
She and I looked at each other.
"What?" I said.
My son grinned. "That's how we roll."
Argh!
This evening, after he had taken his bath, my daughter questioned him about whether or not he had cleaned up.
"Did you clean the bathtub?"
"I cleaned up my clothes."
"Did you clean the bathtub?"
"Well, I didn't have time because I cleaned my clothes."
Then the daddy got in the game. "So, is that a yes or no answer?"
"Um, no."
Then my husband turned to my daughter. "Go clean the bathtub."
She and I looked at each other.
"What?" I said.
My son grinned. "That's how we roll."
Argh!
August 20, 2011
The Many Uses of Duct Tape
I thought duct tape was this bland silver tape that was used by electricians.
Turns out I was wrong.
"Mom, I need to buy some duct tape," my nine-year-old daughter informed me.
"Why? Are you planning some home repair project?"
"No. I'm going to make a bracelet."
"Huh?"
We went to Target and got some "Hello Kitty" duct tape. Yes, duct tape is no longer the boring silver thing it once was. It comes in all kinds of fashionable colors and designs. "Hello Kitty" is apparently one of the more popular designs.
Soon my daughter was sporting a lovely "Hello Kitty" duct tape bracelet.
Who would've thought?
Turns out I was wrong.
"Mom, I need to buy some duct tape," my nine-year-old daughter informed me.
"Why? Are you planning some home repair project?"
"No. I'm going to make a bracelet."
"Huh?"
We went to Target and got some "Hello Kitty" duct tape. Yes, duct tape is no longer the boring silver thing it once was. It comes in all kinds of fashionable colors and designs. "Hello Kitty" is apparently one of the more popular designs.
Soon my daughter was sporting a lovely "Hello Kitty" duct tape bracelet.
Who would've thought?
August 19, 2011
Flying Food
You'd think that dog would behave himself after all the trouble he's gotten into lately. Fat chance. Today, he decided to make his food fly. How? He jumped into his food bowl which catapulted the food high into the air. The food landed all over the kitchen floor, and even spread into our front entry-way.
"Moron!" I said. "What's the matter with you?"
My husband came in to see what the problem was. Of course he thought it was funny.
"Oh, but he loves you!"
I got out the broom. I swept up the floor and left a huge pile of kibbles, dirt, and hairballs in front of the dog.
"There you go, dog. I hope you like hair with your kibbles!"
He did. He ate it all up.
"Moron!" I said. "What's the matter with you?"
My husband came in to see what the problem was. Of course he thought it was funny.
"Oh, but he loves you!"
I got out the broom. I swept up the floor and left a huge pile of kibbles, dirt, and hairballs in front of the dog.
"There you go, dog. I hope you like hair with your kibbles!"
He did. He ate it all up.
August 18, 2011
Escaped Dog
Yep. The dog did it again. I'm not sure what happened, but I think my husband opened the backyard gate to pet our German Shepherd, and the dog bolted. He ran our of our yard and around one neighbor's yard. Then he ran into our other neighbor's yard. Then he took off into the woods and disappeared.
I was in the house when all of this happened.
My husband came in. "The dog is gone."
(Quite frankly, I didn't know if I should be happy or sad.)
"You guard our yard, and I'll get the truck and look for him." Then my husband took off into the dusk. Yes, it was starting to get dark. Wonderful timing!
About 15 minutes later, my husband came back. "Do you have the dog?"
"Nope."
"I'll go out one more time." Things did not look good.
Ten minutes later a red pickup truck pulled into our cul-de-sac. Three rough-looking men were piled in the back.
"You missin a dawg?"
'"Why,yes."
"We have him chained up. Can we cut through them there woods?"
"Uh...well, I guess the neighbors won't mind."
We cut through them there woods, crossed that there street, and made our way into the backyard of who knows who.
"We was worried, cuz that there is a big dawg. But he's a wuss." Yeah, I know.
So there was the dog. Panting away, looking guilty as sin. My husband arrived on the scene and we hauled the beast home.
Boy, did he get in trouble! I don't think he'll be trying that stunt any time soon!
I was in the house when all of this happened.
My husband came in. "The dog is gone."
(Quite frankly, I didn't know if I should be happy or sad.)
"You guard our yard, and I'll get the truck and look for him." Then my husband took off into the dusk. Yes, it was starting to get dark. Wonderful timing!
About 15 minutes later, my husband came back. "Do you have the dog?"
"Nope."
"I'll go out one more time." Things did not look good.
Ten minutes later a red pickup truck pulled into our cul-de-sac. Three rough-looking men were piled in the back.
"You missin a dawg?"
'"Why,yes."
"We have him chained up. Can we cut through them there woods?"
"Uh...well, I guess the neighbors won't mind."
We cut through them there woods, crossed that there street, and made our way into the backyard of who knows who.
"We was worried, cuz that there is a big dawg. But he's a wuss." Yeah, I know.
So there was the dog. Panting away, looking guilty as sin. My husband arrived on the scene and we hauled the beast home.
Boy, did he get in trouble! I don't think he'll be trying that stunt any time soon!
August 17, 2011
Another Dog Story
The problem with our German Shepherd is that he's too darn smart. And he has too much time on his hands (paws).
Today he decided to pull up the registers on the kitchen floor. He carefully placed each register cover in a verticle position in the vent, and placed his doggy food bowl and water bowl upside down on top of it . Unfortunately he dumped his food all over the floor, and his water down the vent to accomplish this task.
It was a magnificent piece of art. He seems to have a special talent for decorating. Maybe he should have his own TV show.
Or maybe he should put all that creative energy into something useful, like cleaning up the hair balls he leaves all over the floor!
Today he decided to pull up the registers on the kitchen floor. He carefully placed each register cover in a verticle position in the vent, and placed his doggy food bowl and water bowl upside down on top of it . Unfortunately he dumped his food all over the floor, and his water down the vent to accomplish this task.
It was a magnificent piece of art. He seems to have a special talent for decorating. Maybe he should have his own TV show.
Or maybe he should put all that creative energy into something useful, like cleaning up the hair balls he leaves all over the floor!
August 16, 2011
Frog Bait
My son had just finished eating lunch. He had a brown ring of pudding around his mouth. It looked absolutely ridiculous.
"Come here, buddy," I said. "Let me wipe your face."
"No! Leave it!"
"Why? You're filthy!"
"It's frog bait."
Okay.
On another note: Sequel to the doggy kong story: If you recall, the dog genious threw his kong down our vent. My husband dismembered the vent in the basement today and recovered the kong. Big hassle, but at least we don't have to worry about our house blowing up!
"Come here, buddy," I said. "Let me wipe your face."
"No! Leave it!"
"Why? You're filthy!"
"It's frog bait."
Okay.
On another note: Sequel to the doggy kong story: If you recall, the dog genious threw his kong down our vent. My husband dismembered the vent in the basement today and recovered the kong. Big hassle, but at least we don't have to worry about our house blowing up!
August 15, 2011
Doggy Strikes Again
Genious did it again. This time the naughty German Shepherd has put our entire house in jeopardy.
I was in the office when I heard a thud, and a rolling sound that seemed to go through the vents.
Uh, oh, I thought.
I went into the kitchen to see what kind of trouble the dog had gotten into.
I looked on the floor. The dog had pryed off the register cover that was on the floor. I also noticed that his big red rubber kong was missing.
Then I knew what happened. The beast had thrown his kong down the vent.
I crated the beast, and attempted to get the kong out.
Unfortunately, I could not reach it. I tried all kinds of devices to get that thing out. No luck.
I went downstairs in the basement to assess the situation. That particular vent leads directly to the furnace.
So now, the kong lies somewhere in the vent. At any moment it could teeter into the furnace and our house will blow up.
So, ladies and gentlemen, if these posts stop, you'll know what happened.
I was in the office when I heard a thud, and a rolling sound that seemed to go through the vents.
Uh, oh, I thought.
I went into the kitchen to see what kind of trouble the dog had gotten into.
I looked on the floor. The dog had pryed off the register cover that was on the floor. I also noticed that his big red rubber kong was missing.
Then I knew what happened. The beast had thrown his kong down the vent.
I crated the beast, and attempted to get the kong out.
Unfortunately, I could not reach it. I tried all kinds of devices to get that thing out. No luck.
I went downstairs in the basement to assess the situation. That particular vent leads directly to the furnace.
So now, the kong lies somewhere in the vent. At any moment it could teeter into the furnace and our house will blow up.
So, ladies and gentlemen, if these posts stop, you'll know what happened.
August 13, 2011
Making a Music Video
"Mom, I want to make a music video," my nine-year-old daughter announced.
"Okay. How are you going to do that?" I asked.
"I dunno."
"Hmmm. It sounds like a Klutz project."
For those of you who don't know, Klutz is a company that makes books for kids that shows them how to do all sorts of things, from playing Cats Cradle string games to making music videos.
I found a Klutz book on how to make music videos.
We put up a green screen and started shooting the video. My daughter and her friend were really rocking.
Then the fun began. I had to figure out how to use the software to change the background for the video. I tried a bizillion different ways, but nothing seemed to work. I was getting pretty frustrated.
Then I discoved the directions. Ahhh. Enlightenment.
Now I'm a pro at changing backgrounds and adding all kinds of special effects.
Who knows, maybe someday I'll make my own music video!
"Okay. How are you going to do that?" I asked.
"I dunno."
"Hmmm. It sounds like a Klutz project."
For those of you who don't know, Klutz is a company that makes books for kids that shows them how to do all sorts of things, from playing Cats Cradle string games to making music videos.
I found a Klutz book on how to make music videos.
We put up a green screen and started shooting the video. My daughter and her friend were really rocking.
Then the fun began. I had to figure out how to use the software to change the background for the video. I tried a bizillion different ways, but nothing seemed to work. I was getting pretty frustrated.
Then I discoved the directions. Ahhh. Enlightenment.
Now I'm a pro at changing backgrounds and adding all kinds of special effects.
Who knows, maybe someday I'll make my own music video!
