Adam Chromý's Blog, page 41

Please fire me. I just had to endure a customer yelling and berating me for several minutes because...

Please fire me. I just had to endure a customer yelling and berating me for several minutes because I had no idea how to make him a Blimpie Best®. 

I work at Subway.

Please fire me. My boss can’t take stress so she criticizes and yells at me for no reason. Then when...

Please fire me. My boss can’t take stress so she criticizes and yells at me for no reason. Then when I told her that she was yelling for no reason, she says, “You’ve got an attitude problem!” 

Please fire me. I had to witness my boss hoover down a plate of tri-tip and then chase it with a...

Please fire me. I had to witness my boss hoover down a plate of tri-tip and then chase it with a triple slice of red velvet bundt cake, all in the 7 minutes it took to toast my sandwich.

Please fire me. The next time some elderly resident asks me what they’re name is and where they are...

Please fire me. The next time some elderly resident asks me what they’re name is and where they are I’ll probably lose it and finally cry.

Please fire me. My boss made me serve a whole cheesecake that I had dropped on the kitchen floor.

Please fire me. My boss made me serve a whole cheesecake that I had dropped on the kitchen floor.

Please fire me. A professor just back from sabbatical emailed all the staff members and asked them...

Please fire me. A professor just back from sabbatical emailed all the staff members and asked them to come into the main office at 10:00 a.m. He then doled out a souvenir for each person except me, even the receptionist who only started on Monday got a gift. I’ve worked in this department for 16 years. He even gave gifts to some of the grad students from the things he had leftover.

Please fire me. The second day on the job my manager called me and my colleague, who’s been assigned...

Please fire me. The second day on the job my manager called me and my colleague, who’s been assigned to train me, into his office to reprimand us because we were talking too much for the guy sitting in the cubicle behind me.  My colleague is now training me with signs, notes and by pantomime.

Please fire me. An older customer asked me if I wanted to smoke weed with him, then he said he...

Please fire me. An older customer asked me if I wanted to smoke weed with him, then he said he doesn’t smoke unless it’s after sex but it has to be quick.

Please fire me. I have a collection of Japanese iwako erasers at my desk to cheer me up. My...

Please fire me. I have a collection of Japanese iwako erasers at my desk to cheer me up. My associate loudly refers to them as “the zoo” and whenever she notices a new one on my desk she sneers and says my desk is “too colorful”. Meanwhile she leaves half-eaten potatoes, apple cores and 100% brown bananas on her desk for weeks.

Please fire me. My carpool stopped giving me rides after I suggested it was inappropriate for her to...

Please fire me. My carpool stopped giving me rides after I suggested it was inappropriate for her to ask me for vodka every morning.