Michael Joe Armijo's Blog, page 137

Jealous of Me

"To win a game of chess, you must plan further ahead than your opponent. That single move beyond the scope of what he has envisioned is what creates checkmate and defines victory."
-John Katzenbach
"The Analyst"

Twenty-five years ago today

December 6, 1985
Friday

I had fun drinking and socializing with my peers at the Conference yesterday. I know the Christmas Cruise will be just as enjoyable—if not more.

Carl Brooks is also having a social Christmas gathering on December 22nd. I'm leery about attending and whether or not I should bring along a guest. I may ask Chad to accompany me. I hope he'll want to go.

When I arrived home last night I called Chad and shared the news about my brother transferring to my office. He made me feel better.
Chad reassured me, "You'll be putting in your transfers soon, so it won't be so bad."
"That's true."

Chad and I may see one another tonight. I don't know for sure. I have a section dinner to attend at 'Restaurant on the Bay' in San Francisco. After the dinner I expect to be heading to my gym at 9PM.

I drove Carl Brooks and Margaret Lai home. Carl was all bummed out because he broke his crystal box with his initials on it. We all received one.
I called Stephanie Bautista when I got home, explaining Carl's sadness.
She said, "I'll find out how to get his replaced."

Steph Redding is to mail my letter of recommendation soon, so that's another plus. I cross my fingers to my forthcoming transfer request. Please…

Work was busy with half of the office gone for the Conference. After our work day I drove with Carl to Pier 39 and found 'Restaurant on the Bay'. We waited for the arrival of the rest of our Section. We ate dinner and joked over a number of subjects. All the while I was looking forward to the latter part of my evening (when I met up with Chad).
Forgetfully, I failed to telephone Chad. When I arrived home at about 9PM I thought I'd surprise him at the gym, so I went straight over there. I left the gym at 10:45PM when I called him. Chad was about to leave to pick up his Dad at the Oakland Airport. His dad was returning from Chicago. I made arrangements to accompany Chad to the airport. When we arrived at Oakland Airport we saw Larry leaving the terminal and he seemed pissed-off. He didn't even say hello to me. It was as if I was invisible.

"Larry seems to be jealous of me," I blurted.
Chad finally agreed to that one.

Anyway we took Chad's Dad home and stayed at his folks' house for a good while. They're nice folks. I liked them.

"You can't kill love before it's over. It will seek revenge."
-as heard in the 1999 French Film
"Children of the Century" ("Les enfants du siècle")

The Mark Hopkins Hotel

"In this rat race, everyone's guilty until proven innocent."
--Bette Davis
"All About Eve",
Best-Picture 1950

Twenty-five years ago today

December 5, 1985
Thursday

The weeks seem to go by faster now. I think it has something to do with 'the Excitement I Feel for Chad'. I am glad he'll be around for a while.

My Company Conference at the Mark Hopkins Hotel is scheduled for today. I'm pretty excited about it. I keep forgetting to tell Chad the news about my brother, Tony, transferring in to my office at the end of January. Why he had to follow my moves is beyond me? Anyhow, he's coming and I know his transfer was probably partially picked up due to my excellent performance in the office. Larry, my second line manager, probably figured another ARMIJO would do the office justice. Oh well, Tony will be in the other side of the office amidst the eighty people that roam our office. I may never really come in too much contact with him.

Tony and I get along reasonably well but too much of the bull-headed TAURUS gets on my nerves. He sometimes acts like he's too good and then again he's docile enough as far as I'm concerned. We always had fights and arguments when we were younger. Maybe it'll get better now that "H" is his wife (and she loves me much).

I boarded a bus and headed up to the Mark Hopkins Hotel. It was nice. It was truly a fun-filled day, too. It started out with a roll and coffee and them some comedy team called Murphy St. Paul. The comedy team played Masters of Ceremonies for the day. Rewards were distributed. Part of the day included the Golden Gate Bowl which was made up of answering each other's questions throughout ten groups. Then we formed small groups for a short problem-solving session. There was also a lecturer who entertained us on how to breathe and deal with difficulties at work (as well as getting more enjoyment from our work). It was really a fun day.

I realized that my brother, Tony, is going to be coming in my office at the end of next month (January 1986). I am not too thrilled about it…especially when my boss, Stephanie, said, "Larry says he got word from Tony that he was going to show you up."
"I'm not out to compete with my own brother," I thought, "I don't know what his problem is—maybe he just didn't know what other conversation to make with Larry. He's such a dip!"


Chuck Koveley came over to our table and spoke with me, Carl, Margaret, Sue and Mary. He was pretty nice. He's the VP of Marketing. I'd like to meet up with him again and exchange ideas. Then again I'd kind of like to simply transfer-out to Directory Yellow Page Sales. At least I'll have my Marketing Degree and three references of documentation (includes one form S. Redding and my current boss) to support me. I just may submit three transfers for a Directory Sales Representative position in Oakland, San Francisco or San Jose. I might submit one for Directory Advertising Rep. in Los Angeles, too. What the heck!


From 5:30PM—7:30PM there were cocktails served at the Mark Hopkins Hotel. I must have had five or six Vodka gimlets.  In fact, I'm still 'buzzing' as I write in my journal now and I'm on the next day…ready to write my entry for Friday morning, 7:30AM.

"Go! Do what you must."
-as heard in the 2006 film "DRESDEN"

Lift Heavier Weights

"All we need is LOVE."
-1998 Film, "Good Night Mr. Tom"based on the 1980 novel by Michelle Magorian
Twenty-five years ago today
December 4, 1985
Wednesday

During my haircut yesterday I told Bella, "Listen, I'll see what I can do about deleting your Installation Charges for your new telephone service."
I figured 'what the hell'. She gave me a free haircut.

Chad said, "I may see you at the gym tonight."
He's got finals coming and all. I don't want to detract him from studying. I know he'll do well even if he can't spell 'San Francisco' or 'license' or 'transferred' (Ha-ha).

Work was blah-zay. I received a call from Margaret Lai this morning and learned that she'd been sick and NOT on vacation.
Margaret said, "Dex and I had it out last night."
What that literally means I do not know. It sounded like she was about to cry when she said it though. I felt bad for her. She is coming to the Conference at The Mark Hopkins Hotel tomorrow night. It will be nice to see her and talk face-to-face.

Steph Redding telephoned me, too. She was feeling depressed and I aroused some happiness in to her.
"You made me feel better," she said.
I'm glad of that. Those words she blurted still ring in my head: "Things never seem to work out for me."
I feel all of that remains to be seen. Everyone feels this way at one time or another.

After work I went home and I dropped by mom's house to receive a package that arrived my U.S. mail. Then I raced over to the '24 Hour Nautilus' gym in San Leandro. There was no sign of Chad. I did see Bob Maloney doing aerobics. I could tell he was having a hard time with the class today because he hadn't been too regular with his visits to the gym.

I popped over to MACY's and found an Estee Lauder 'White Linen' perfume gift for mom.

Once home I was attempting to wrap Chad's 'December 16th' Birthday gift when he telephoned. It was a nice surprise.
"I just got off work at the TV studio at eight o'clock. I regret not being able to see you at the gym."
"That's okay," I said reassuringly.
"You know, a good work out takes two hours for me because I do twelve minutes on the bike, one set of twelve reps on the machines, a repeat of one set/twelve reps with the same weight, then six to eight reps at increased weight levels, then twelve more minutes on the bike."
"I'm tired thinking of all that. I'm not sure if that would kill me or not—but I'm going to try that the next time I go."
We laughed.
I added, "My goal or New Year resolution for 1986 is to look awesome this summer for 'on the beach' days. I can't wait to get started. I mean, I don't have to wait until January 1st to get started, do I?"

I still haven't finished writing out all of my Christmas Cards. I did mail a number of them off yesterday evening though.


I telephoned Chad before I went to bed to simply say, "Good night."
"Pleasant dreams," Chad replied.


I don't recall my dreams lately.


Rene Narducci, a coworker at the Office, asked, "Are you losing weight?"
I was thinking about that. I had explained to Chad that I wanted to gain weight, but not fat.
Chad advised, "You need to lift heavier weights."
That sounds hard to do but I've got to try.




Diversity of opinion about a work of art shows that the work is new, complex, and vital.
-Oscar Wilde
"The Picture of Dorian Gray"

Russian Cut

"Do you have some chocolate cake?" she asked.
"A chocolate cheesecake," the woman replied.
She nodded.
"Bring a piece for my friend, here," she said. "His life has suddenly turned bitter and he neeeds some sweetness to get him through the next few days."
-John Katzenbach
"The Analyst"


Twenty-five years ago today

December 3, 1985
Tuesday

I was thinking of Chad this morning and wondering if he may show up one day at my home (upon my arrival home from work). That would be a nice surprise. Just then—Chad telephoned.
"Hey Mike, I just called to wish you a good day and to tell you how very much I've been thinking of you today."
That call meant a lot to me (as does he). WAGG: What a Great Guy.
Chad also said, "I played hooky from my first class today and I was just now reminiscing over everything—from beginning to end—between us."
I'm glad he's happy because it makes me happier.

I guess I will let Bella cut my hair tonight at 6PM. She's the client who offered the free haircut.

Margaret Lai is out ill today. I hope she'll show up on Thursday for the day at The Mark Hopkins Hotel. That's a freebie day.

I went to Wendy's for lunch with Mary McTiernan. I told a fib, mentioning my new roommate, Chad.
I added, "Chad might be going on the Company Christmas Cruise with me."

I was just going over some of the things Chad (may have) read in my journal. He didn't say much about what he'd read; however, I guess I didn't write all that much that he didn't know already (except for some of my private inner thoughts, relating to him). The thoughts were good (the majority of the time).

After work I went to the 'Banana Republic' store and bought Dad a Swiss army shirt, socks and a thermal-like T-shirt for Christmas. I also bought my niece, Ashley, something educational: An Activity School Center at a Toy Shop near Union Square. Then I went to Bella's Salon which happens to be next-door to Vidal Sassoon's Salon. She did a good job cutting my hair (at least I thought so). Bella has lived in San Francisco for five years and comes from Russia.
Bella says, "I've been cutting hair for sixteen years!"
I guess one could say that I just received my very first 'Russian cut'.

I left San Francisco by 7PM and went straight home to telephone Chad. Chad read some statements over the phone about 'The Positive Relationship'. We matched the statements to our own relationship. We agreed that we seem to be working out fine.


I wrote out some Christmas Cards to a number of people. My pictures (most of them anyway) were ready, so I included about half of them inside my cards.

I began watching the movie that Chad had given to me called "Something Wicked This Way Comes." I was too tired to watch it all, so I went to bed.

Sometimes I wonder what the future holds. I know I am now having Chad in my life and all. I may as well make the best of it.

'As I have said many times, one is lonely when one is in some way impoverished inside oneself. I do still love solitude and need it to discover where I really am.'
-May Sarton
At Eighty-Two, A Journal (Sept. 15, 1993)

A Dream Apart

"It's funny how you can tell when people are in love."

-Ray Milland

DIAL M FOR MURDER, 1954 Classic Hitchcock Film

It was only a few days ago (November 23, 2010) that my longtime partner, Alan, found two cards that I had written to him on October 5, 1998 (a little over 12 years ago). It was fun when Alan read them aloud recently:

October 5, 1998

Monday, 12:50PM

Dear Alan,

Obviously, the reasons I chose this card are quite clear. The words I would have expressed are ALREADY imprints on this card (I love the time we spend TOGETHER...especially our time ALONE).

We just experienced a 3-day adventure in Amsterdam, Holland. I truly enjoyed myself. I can't Thank You enough for doing all of the planning you did. The Amstel Intercontinental was simply Presidential and suitable for royalty. Sometimes I feel we are in fact, ROYAL in nature, my dear Sir Alan!

You sure did an excellent job driving from Amsterdam to Brussels, Belgium in just two hours or so. You are my hero. I could never have done that---even if the cars in Europe were available in automatic versus 'stick shift'. You're so talented in many ways!

Well, our next stop is a former vacation getaway estate of J. Paul Getty in the outskirts of Rome called Poste La Vecchia. I'm sure that will be true luxury and relaxation.

If I don't say it often enough—allow me to write it: I do appreciate you. I do Love You. And if allowed--I will tell you the three things that stick in my mind about Amsterdam that I enjoyed with you. The three things are really simple events, not a fancy dinner or a special gift but…

1. Our walks amidst the Amsterdam Canals side by side

2. Holding you close during our naps and/or 'good nights' like so….

(PHOTO on front of Card):

3. Watching you and me fiddle over smoking two 'super skunk' joints at 'The Other Side Café' and creating a "BONFIRE" after getting fed up with the lighting of all of those matches.

Well, my best-friend and lover---

What new adventures are forthcoming?

Love You,

Michael

Enclosed in this card was a postcard.
PHOTO: "A Dream", The Postcard

I wrote:

"A Dream", a short story by Michael J. Armijo

I couldn't sleep during the HEAT of the night, so I went for a snack in the kitchenette in my Calvin Klein underwear and V-neck T-shirt. I simply peeled an orange, craving some Vitamin C. Here I was after two weeks on the Island of Capri, off the coast of Naples (Napoli), Italy; so tan and hot. The orange did not completely absorb the craving I needed. It was a HOT summer. Even the Concierge told us it was unusually HOT this year. It's no wonder I had a complete tan after the first week on the island.

The "us" I refer to is me, Michael, and my lover, Alan. After tossing my orange peels into the trash I heard a noise. I know I must have awoken Alan. He will be mad at me for making the kitchenette and faucet-running noises. I sat at the nearby table of antique wood and pulled up my V-nect T-shirt to disguise/hide myself when Alan walked in to the kitchenette. My lover looked at me and did not yell after all.  Instead, he reached out his hand…and I WOKE UP.

Twenty-five years ago today

December 2, 1985
Monday

Today was Cindy Chow's 'celebrate her Birthday' Day; yet, no one (hardly) was present in our office Section today. Margaret Lai had the day off (and so did our supervisor, Stephanie Bautista).

I had a good sales day.

Bella, a customer, offered me a free haircut tomorrow night. I may take her up on it. Why not?

I ate at Carl's Jr., today, after a quick visit for money at the bank.  I laughed to myself occasionally as I thought of Chad and our just plain being together. I flashed back to being with him and our silly festivities.

After work I went home and made a tape copy of my Muscle Motion Aerobics for Chad. I worked out to the aerobics tape. I was soon out the door and on my way to the gym. I returned home by 9:25PM.
Leonardo called me.
"I've been to the gym on Monday, Wednesday and Friday lately—but I must be going earlier than you," Leonard announced proudly.
"I think so because I must be missing you by minutes. I do go a little bit later now."
"So, what have you been up to?"
"Oh, the usual…I spent Thanksgiving with my family."
I didn't mention Chad though.  I may talk about it the next time.  He knows Chad but Leonard had previously stated, "I've talked to him a little and left it at that…"
I wonder if there's an inside-story.  Whatever--it doesn't matter now as it is MJA and CMG now.

I had some juice before bedtime. I took a brief peek at 'The John and Yoko: A LOVE STORY' movie.

I awoke with a dream at 3:15AM. Who remembers the dream now?  Surprisingly, it was difficult for me to return to sleep.

The question always exists in our world, does it not? Is anyone safe? Is any relationship without danger? Are we not often hurt the most by those we love and respect more than those we hate and fear?

--John Katzenbach

THE ANALYST

XS

I'll tell everyone that the children are my reason for living, when in reality my life is THEIR reason for living.
--Paulo Coelho
"Veronika Decides To Die"

Twenty-five years ago today

December 1, 1985
Sunday

My first day of December and I spent the start of it bicycling with Chad. We rode to 'La Petite Boulangerie' in Alameda. This place is becoming our standard local visit on Sunday mornings. We did some more riding after we checked for free candy samples at the Hallmark Card Shop. There were no complimentary candy handouts today.

We enjoyed lunch at the Ice-Cream Dock. It happened to start raining, so we didn't ride our bikes much longer. We proceeded to my place and watched 'COUNTRY'. I admit that I began falling asleep to it. Eventually we went upstairs to get ready to return the videotapes to WHEREHOUSE RECORDS. We both got side tracked because we both concurred to horse-back riding. Chad rode. It was fun.

We had to stand in a long line at WHEREHOUSE RECORDS. Dinner at Wendy's (sort of) made up for the long wait.

We returned to Chad's pad in Castro Valley since it was closer. I would have rather been back at my pad. Larry was there and I was recalling the phone conversation that Chad had with him at my house last Saturday night. Chad wanted to chew Larry out for his rudeness. Chad was on the defensive about 'us', saying we had every right to be at the house last Saturday. It seems that Larry's pal, Randy, feeds these negative things into Larry's head. As I was listening it sounded to me like Larry has had strong feelings towards Chad in the past. It's just that Chad never returned those feelings. There is definitely an inside story here but it's not important now.

When Chad and I left Wendy's I said, "It looks like your eyes are watering."
"They are," Chad answered, confirming the tears.
Suddenly, his eyes began to get more watery. It reminded me of Mel Gibson in the "TIM" movie. Tim would be so happy that he'd cry.  I think Chad is so happy to be so close to me.  I hope to (and I better) straighten him out to the fact that I care deeply for him as well.

I don't want our picture perfect scenario to ever mess-up. It is as I'd written in a previous card: 'It won't mess-up if we really want it to work.'

We lounged and watched Amazing Stories, Alfred Hitchcock and Johnny Dangerously. I was soon driving back to my home in the rain. I was thinking about all of the things Chad and I had shared over this last weekend. It's been "XS" (Extra Special).

He was afraid of deep water, hated swimming or trying to, and often thought that somehow his end might be watery.
-Patricia Highsmith
"The Boy Who Followed Ripley"

Leave Me Alone

It is easier to move mountains than to change the hearts of men.
-Bette Bao Lord
"Spring Moon"

Twenty-five years ago today

November 30, 1985
Saturday

We woke up late. It was already noon! I don't really like sleeping-in that late anymore. I could get reprogrammed if I don't watch it. I have trouble getting up at the crack of dawn as it is on Monday through Friday.

By 1:30PM or so—after showering—Chad and I went to Stone Ridge Shopping Mall in Pleasanton to look around. Chad and I ran into Randy who works out at our gym. He's a nice guy. We exchanged a few words with him and then we departed.

We tried on some neat olive green 501 LEVI jeans at The Gap. One saleslady named Michelle was exceptionally nice to us. There were a couple of other sales clerks (of the male gender) who were eyeing us as well. The visit to the mall was fun. I think it was mainly because of the company.

Chad read most of my journal (up to the green ink) on November 27, 1985. I allowed him to read it during our drive to the Stone Ridge Mall. It kept him interested to say the least. I believe he liked what I had written about him. It's mostly good except for his snide remarks that I may have mentioned. I do hate when he tells me to leave him alone.
He literally says, "Leave me alone!"
It kind of hurts my feelings. I do notice that he now says 'please' when he has to be rude with statements like that. 'Leave me alone, please' is still rather hurtful.

Chad and I returned to his place and we played more FROGGER. It was getting a little boring for me. Chad could tell I wasn't into the computer game.

Larry came over and brought a pizza. We fiddled with observing a new 'BUCK ROGERS in the 25th Century' videotape but I didn't like that much either.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AnhEtkSxBr4
Larry politely asked Chad, "Are you staying-in?"
It was more like he was politely chasing us out.

Chad and I left to go work out at the gym. We had planned to go in the steam room but we didn't'. We didn't stay very long since we arrived at 9:15PM and they were closing at 10PM (early tonight).

We went to the Alpha-Beta grocery store. Chad laughed and made the "UH" sound when I said "Hi" to the sales clerk. Chad claimed that the sales clerk was actually saying "Hi" to the lady ahead of us (whatever). After purchasing our snacks of Honey Vanilla ice-cream and Chocolate Chocolate-Chip we sat comfortably in my car. I almost tripped on a banana peel while walking to my car.

We soon found ourselves at WHEREHOUSE RECORDS where we rented the movies, "Country" and "Vision Quest". We watched "Vision Quest" at my house and then went to bed.
Chad kept saying, "We better got to sleep."
I tend to just ignore his moodiness now. It's only because he eventually does 'come'. And then he ends up doing something really nice to make up for his abrupt words.

He was too ashamed really to cry, he merely cried in words onto the patient sheets of paper.
-Thomas Mann, "Six Early Stories"
FALLED, 1894

Jagged Edge

"Do you believe in love stories?"
-as heard in the 2000 French film,
"Just a Question of Love" (aka Juste une question d'amour)

Twenty-five years ago today

November 29, 1985
Friday

I woke up and cleaned house a bit. I did do aerobics for forty-five minutes.

When I telephoned Chad we firmed up our plans. I was to arrive at his place at around 2PM. I chose to go to mom's house beforehand for a 'leftovers' turkey special lunch.

When I arrived at Chad's pad I was introduced to FROGGER. It's a computer game that I was not too thrilled about (at first). Once I learned I became a tad addicted. It's fun. By the time Chad was ready we left and made the 3:45PM screening of the new movie, JAGGED EDGE (starring Glen Close). It was a good suspenseful thrill ride. We both liked it.


After the movie we looked around at SOUTHLAND and browsed at Emporium but we didn't buy anything. We did share some macaroni salad and lasagna at a Deli inside the SOUTHLAND Food and Restaurant area. Of course, what would a meal be without a bit of Mrs. Fields' cookies for dessert?

We returned to Chad's place for more FROGGER.

Larry and his young pal, Randy, were at the house, watching The Twilight Zone. I watched a little of it, then Chad and I went to bed. We slept pretty well.

Thank God that's over. Visits tire me to the bone.
-Joanne Harris
"CHOCOLAT"

Thanks for Giving

It was a privileged life, but it was still life in a gilded cage.
-Tilar Mazzeo
"The Widow Clicquot"

Twenty-five years ago today

November 28, 1985
Thursday, Thanksgiving Day

Chad and I got dressed to ready ourselves for each of our own family Thanksgiving's. I drove Chad home to Castro Valley and was at my mom's house by 12:30PM. I was the last one to arrive. We all ate together: Tony, Helen, Lauren, John, Sherri, Ashley, Ma, Pa and 'me'. It was nice.

I took a nap after the meal. I watched some of the usual videos (North by Northwest, Tim and Thief of Hearts).

My brother, John, had to work at Gallagher's tonight, so he left around 4PM.

Helen and Tony were going to visit Helen's mom and dad and left at 6PM.

I stayed at mom and dad's house until 9PM or so, then went home to do some aerobics (for a good thirty minutes). That's all I could handle after the yummy stuffing.

I watched DYNASTY II.

I was feeling lonely and decided to call Chad but he wasn't home yet. I left a message with Larry.

When Chad called back (at 12:30AM) I was asleep. He'd been playing MONOPOLY at his parent's house. We made arrangements to get together tomorrow. It was bed-time for me. Yawn.

Breathing in, I calm my body.
Breathing out, I smile.
Dwelling in the present moment,
I know this is a wonderful moment.
-Thich Nhat Hanh
"Being Peace"

Whispers of Wonder

No one is born a great cook, one learns by doing.
--Julia Child
"My Life in France"

Twenty-five years ago today

November 27, 1985
Wednesday

I had a dream last night that Rachelle Davies came back into my life. We were in bed together. I shuddered at the thought that I could get involved again with this "girl". It's true that our sex was always good but our relationship could NOT be built on that alone. Henceforth, I awoke from the dream and it made me wonder how often Rachelle may think of me. I plan to send her a photo Christmas card.
Today, Chad is coming in to The City. It's good and yet on another pretext it's rather scary. I mean, he's going on my Company Christmas Cruise with me. I know there will be 'whispers of wonder' about us. It shouldn't matter. It really doesn't matter. I guess I just don't want to see other fellow coworkers 'oooing and ahhhing' or asking me questions. Give me a break!

I guess I will start my day now and look forward to 5PM when I will see Chad (my greatest joy this Holiday season).

The Thanksgiving Holiday weekend is over but I shall back track and reminisce now…

Well, on Wednesday my section had another Pac Tel Referral luncheon. It was nice. Judy, the new gal in-training, was there as was Dean.

By 5PM (finally) I walked over to Montgomery and Post Streets, seeing no sign of Chad. As I stood around he showed up, looking as nice as he usually does. We walked over to and through the Sheraton Palace Hotel to a classy phone booth. We looked for an Italian Restaurant and I recommended "A Little Italy" on 24th Street, so that's where we went. I took a chance and parked in a No Parking zone. I got lucky.

Chad said, "You look a bit older tonight."
I laughed, "It's probably because I'm wearing a white shirt and tie."
He's so fun.

We went to Sutter's Mill after dinner. It was a place I'd heard about. It's a place where gay businessmen gentlemen go after work for Happy Hour to unwind. Chad and I walked to the bar and went in and out relatively quickly. I overheard an older gentleman at the bar ogling over the two of us to a friend.
"Don't they make such a nice looking couple? It's always the light with the dark."
I believe he was referring to Chad as the 'light' one and me as the 'dark' one. 

We continued the evening by going over to PIER 39. We walked along, looking through many shops here and there. It was fun. I (accidentally) walked out of one store after purchasing tiny bicycle plates with the names CHAD, LAUREN and ASHLEY. Tis the season.

Chad and I spent a good forty-five minutes in a sweatshirt shop. We finally chose solid black sweatshirts with the word CALIFORNIA imprinted on the sleeve. We had them personalized with our first names on the front (MICHAEL, CHAD). We walked around more shops and got some lemonade. Suddenly, it started to rain! We saw an old lady, wearing flood pants. Chad made me laugh.
When Chad felt the rain and the lady in the flood pants he commented, "How did she know?"
It was so funny. We really laughed non-stop about that.

By now we were ready to go back to Alameda. We went to my place. I loved those hugs when we got to my house.

Chad made Marshmallow Krispies in my kitchen while I wrote some postcards for my family for Thanksgiving tomorrow. I wrote Chad a couple of cards, too. He was cooking, so he had no clue. We looked at each other and dwelled over one another. We took deep breaths periodically.

One of my favorite parts of this evening was at PIER 39 when Chad said, "I have something to tell you and you may or may not like it but I am going to tell you anyway."
"What?"
"I'm at a point now where I feel I am falling in love with you."
I felt a big smile in my heart.

There need not always be real reasons for such disruptions; in the present unstable state of affairs often a mere nothing, a mood, will turn the scale, and in the same way a mere nothing, a word, can put things right again.
-Franz Kafka
"The Married Couple"