Michael Joe Armijo's Blog, page 136

A Mama's Boy

He had to let off steam, otherwise we would never hear the end of it.
-Thomas Mann
"Fallen", a short story, 1894

Twenty-five years ago today

December 16, 1985
Monday

It's Chad's Birthday and he's still asleep in my bed (where I wish I was right now). He may meet me for lunch and we may go to FRIDAY's in South San Francisco tonight. We'll see how it goes.

I telephoned Chad periodically throughout the day.  He couldn't make it in time for lunch in The City.
He did say, "I will be there at five o'clock though!"

At 5PM he still wasn't anywhere in sight.  I didn't know what to make of it. He ran into some difficulties.  I waited in front of my building until 5:45PM when he finally appeared. We went to TGIF's and had a nice dinner.  We called Mary McTiernan who lived nearby and she came over to join us. It was fun until Chad made some snide remarks that I didn't like.
For instance, he said, "Joan Rivers has a strong gay following."
I didn't like WHEN he said it. He said it right after I said, "I'm a big fan of Joan Rivers."
Chad also said (in front of Mary), "You're a wuss and a mama's boy."
He said this after I said, "I like to eat over at my mom's house because it's hard to cook for one person."

And to top it off, I noticed Mary ordered a Michelob beer and I said with a smile, "Oh, a 'MICHAEL'—Obe!"
Chad responded, "You're so vain."
Those little things really do build-up. I got even by making a few comments about his waistline. It was kind of silly since his body is exquisite as far as I'm concerned.

During the drive home I didn't say a whole lot. Chad followed me home in his car.
Once at my pad, Chad telephoned Larry.  They spoke about little nothings.  I believe Chad only called Larry because he wasn't enjoying my company. I don't think he realized that I was just trying to get over his sarcasm from earlier this evening.

I spoke to Larry for a while also.
Larry said, "I'm confused. I don't know why Chad is calling me to find out if Randy was working. He said he was 'just curious' but I don't get it."

Earlier, Chad and I were at the San Francisco BART station.
Chad blurted, "I feel like going out for my Birthday. I'll follow you home and I might call some friends about getting together."
Perhaps he wanted to see my reaction when he chose to call Larry or whoever…


We started to watch a 'Cagney and Lacey" TV-episode which I did NOT really want to see.  I managed to persuade Chad to watch the PAPILLON movie.  We did.  We didn't get to bed until late (12:50PM).  I was beat-tired.  I slept—but not long enough.

We live in a state of dreaming.
...as long as we continue in this dream we are...living in a circle.
-Tony Parson
"As It Is"

Spoil A Man

Hurts and fears can lurk deeply concealed under layers of stress, but they are there and can be found, no matter how powerful the psychological forces of denial can be.
-John Katzenbach
"The Analyst"

Twenty-five years ago today

December 15, 1985
Sunday

Well, I've decided to let bygones be bygones. I unplugged my telephone this morning, so I slept well (as did Chad). We awoke at about 11AM.

Chad and I visited Larry at the Oakland Airport even thought I didn't really want to go. I complied with Chad's wishes once again. I tend to be so agreeable where he's concerned. This could spoil a man.

Then we went to his folks' house where we had a nice, early Birthday dinner for Chad. We played UNO. I met his sister, Narn, and her husband, David, and Chad's brother (also named David). We had a good time. We even went to his father's Baptist Church for a Christmas Evening gathering. That was nice. We returned to his folks' house and munched out and watched 'A Christmas in Washington' with Amy Grant, the singer.


Chad and I eventually came home to my pad and we 'horsed around'. We slept. Chad did open his Birthday gift. I think he liked it. I did.

Question: "How are we going to solve this puzzle?"
Answer: "We sum up the facts we have. We try to find more."
-Stieg Larsson
"The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo"

The Slap

"You have to earn forgiveness.
You can't run from your mistakes."
-KYLE-XY
Season II

PHOTO, December 14, 1985:
Chad Mark Glen, Karyn Kossoff, Michael Armijo

Twenty-five years ago today

December 14, 1985
Saturday

I woke up and went to mom's house. We had a nice talk. She was setting up the Christmas tree. We laughed together. We made each other smile.

I met Chad at Bay Fair Shopping Center in San Leandro at 12:45 this afternoon. He was supposed to be there at noon but he was late. I had already bought my Grandma her Christmas gift. I bought Carl (my coworker) a gift also.

Chad and I had a bite to eat. I got sick on the baked potato. I went home. Chad went to the gym.

I tried taking a nap. I telephoned Chad at about 4:15PM.

Chad came over looking dashing in his black bow tie, white shirt and black velvet blazer. I changed my clothes very quickly and we were off to The City.

The San Francisco Bay Cruise Party was pretty fun. The food was good. Chad seemed to thoroughly enjoy himself.
Karyn Kossoff said, "Michael, I have a question but I want to make sure you won't be offended if I ask."
I knew this was coming.
"No, its okay, Karyn…just ask me."
"Are you and Chad more than roommates?"
I denied it.
Now that I think on it I am sort of offended.

Ron Shelly tried to persuade Chad to do a line of COKE.
Ron said to Chad, "I hope to see you Friday night for Karyn's farewell."
I may or may not go to Karyn's farewell. Drinks are expensive. Funds are slim this time of year.

The fist-clencher event on the boat came when Chad slapped my face! I kiddingly made a remark to Carmen about her slip.
Carmen said, "My slip doesn't match my dress."
I said something like this: "Let me see…or just go up the stairs to the upper deck and I'll try to look under."
Maybe it's Chad's gentleman nature or his religious upbringing but he sure as hell knew I was kidding around. It was a party and I didn't mean any harm. Besides that I was sure she's heard worse lines. Regardless, Chad's slap was uncalled for. Of course, Dale Orlando had to be the person to notice.
Dale blurted, "Good slap, Chad!"
The big slob!

The rest of the cruise was okay. I danced with Karyn Kossoff, Margaret Lai, Michelle Fall's sister (Stacey), and Elizabeth Center. That was about it. I didn't win a door prize either.

At first I thought Chad seemed to envy the relationship of Ryan and Joe. Surprisingly, I saw Chad give them a dirty look while in the bathroom. One of those 'Ugh, you're fags' looks.

After the cruise Mary, Brenda, Carmen, Mary's brother, Chad and I went to SILOHETTES. It was an okay after party (nice and brief). We all had a good time.

Chad and I went home and we reconciled our differences regarding 'The Slap' during the drive. I'd almost forgotten but it bummed me out to think of it—as it still does.
I told Chad once before, "If you ever hit me that would move me in the wrong way."
I'd say 'The Slap' constitutes as a hit.


One thought and one thought alone was in his mind.
-Shyam Selvadurai
"Cinnamon Gardens", a novel

"No Show"

"If you want her...don't try...don't plan...don't prepare...FEEL!"
-as heard in the 2000 Film
"Woman On Top",
starring Penelope Cruz

Twenty-five years ago today

December 13, 1985
Friday

Well, today is Friday the 13th. I trust a lucky versus unlucky day is in store for me. It's nice to have a clean car again.

Well, it's now time for breakfast. Maybe I'll have a pancake today.

Work flew by as usual. I met my commitment to go to the gym. Chad pulled another "no show" but that's okay.

Denise Vinsonhaler telephoned me at work to flake out on lunch. She urged me to go to Baxter's in Concord tonight once again. I don't really care to go there two weekends in a row.

I was home after my gym work out and watched my taped episode of DYNASTY. I telephoned Chad and he was preparing his Christmas Cards.
"I can't wait to see them," I said excitedly.
"I'll try and come over later."
I was happy that Chad planned to come over but as it turned out he didn't.

Strangely enough, Margaret Lai telephoned me in the middle of the night. She was crying about Dex and his attitude towards her. I tried to console her, and then I went to bed.

"Some mysteries are better left unsolved."
-KYLE XY,
Season I

Santa's Helper

Man is an animal organism with (like others) an unmistakably bisexual disposition. The individual corresponds to a fusion of two symmetrical halves, of which, according to some investigators, one is purely male and the other female.
-Sigmund Freud
"Civilization and its Discontents"

Twenty-five years ago today

December 12, 1985
Thursday

It was 9:07AM and Chad had set his alarm clock for 9:15AM.
"Chad, you have eight more minutes."
It was now 9:12AM.
"Chad, you have three minutes."
Suddenly, he yelled at me.
"I can't stand that!"
Chad stormed out of the bed and yelled loudly, "Please don't do that!"
I said calmly, "Please don't yell at me."
Then Chad stormed in to the bathroom and shut the door.

I remained in bed for a while and then decided to get up myself. I was planning to stay and wash my car while he got his hair cut but I decided to just leave.

By the time Chad came out of the bathroom he transformed his attitude and became apologetic.
"I'm sorry for yelling."
He tried to rationalize his grouchiness in the mornings.
"It's all right," I said, giving in easily.
I still decided to leave when he departed for his scheduled hair cut appointment.

I went straight to mom's house and enjoyed a hearty meal of pancakes for breakfast. I went ahead and washed my car after all. I had the air pressure in my tires checked, including the oil, lube and filter change. I returned to my place and went over to play with my niece, Ashley, for a while. I ate a grilled cheese sandwich for lunch.

I took a nap at mid-afternoon and dreamt about all of my bills that needed to be paid. It's true that we all try to dream our problems away. Chad had previously mentioned a dream of someone trying to kill—or get rid of—him. I bet that someone is Larry, his roommate, because in reality he has been hinting and pressuring Chad to move out of his house.

I thought I left my keys inside my house and locked myself out at four o'clock today. I sneaked into mom's house and couldn't find my spare key. I telephoned Dad at his work place.
Dad solved the mystery: "I have the spare key and garage opener in my Pinto."
Since Dad's Pinto was parked at his work establishment at the Del Monte Corporation I chose to stay over at my brother's (John) house until 11:30PM (when my Dad would be getting home).

After John left for work and Sherri was about to leave I realized that I'd left my keys at John's house all along when I came by earlier to play with Ashley.

I left a message with Larry.
"Oh, Hi Larry, could you just tell Chad that I called."
"Okay, I know he's at his folks' house."

I received a phone call from Steph Redding.
"So Michael, how do you like my book, The Texas Temptress?"
"Well, I haven't had a chance to start it yet."
Chad returned my call. I arranged a meeting with him at the Southland Mall in Hayward for 8PM.

I left my house and arrived at the Southland Mall before Chad. I ended up browsing some stores and bought my sister-in-law, Sherri, a purse for Christmas. The sales girl was cute, too. She gave me a tempting 'I like you' kind of smile.
I smiled back and said, "You make a good lookin' Santa's helper. It makes me want to be Santa!"
After purchasing the gift she said, "You'd make a cute Santa."
That statement could be taken as a complement—I guess.
Chad showed up and we shopped for a shirt for my Company Christmas Cruise Party and a gift for my niece, Lauren. I also bought a few strawberry preserves for my office Section.

Lastly, Chad and I went to our clean cars (both were washed today). We sat in my car for a while and Chad was wondering about me. I think he was a trite bit worried about how and why I left his house this morning. I believe he just wanted reassurance of my feelings—but he must know! I mean, I do "feel" for Chad. He trusts me as I do him.

I went home and was in bed by 10:30PM.
Chad telephoned.
"I wanted to wish you a good night. I'll call you between five forty-five and eight o'clock tomorrow night so we can get together at the gym and maybe come to my place for a pizza and video."
I replied, "I like that idea…and I look forward to it."

I was falling asleep when Denise Vinsonhaler telephoned.
"Are you blind to NOT know when someone really likes you?" Denise asked, "Namely me!"
I laughed.
She continued, "I'll come to San Francisco tomorrow afternoon to meet you for lunch."
"Okay," I said, but I'm skeptical. I'll believe it when I see it.

Chad had told me he'd meet me in The City for lunch on Monday, December 16th. It's his birthday. He'll be the BIG '26'.

"She delights me."
-actor, Eric Bogosian
TIME STANDS STILL
Broadway Play, CORT Theater

Texas Temptress

Odd that a few lines of typing could mean so much, could so change a person's life.
-Nial Kent
"The Divided Path"

Twenty-five years ago today

December 11, 1985
Wednesday

I learned that I have another day off with pay this year. I may take this day off tomorrow!

Today our office is having a catered lunch. At 2PM our Section and others are going on a San Francisco tour with a dinner to follow. It should end around 7:30PM or so. I've just had one activity after another lately.

Oh yes-Stephanie Redding is supposed to be coming in to The City today, too. That'll be a sight. I talk to her over the phone enough. I wonder how she'll appear now. I wonder if she's still fat. I wonder what Christmas gift she purchased for me. I haven't found anything for her. I'm not sure what to get her (period!). I'll see.

The main ones on my Christmas list now are Sherri, Lauren, Grandma, Paloma, Margaret, my coworkers in Section G. I am adding Steff and Tabitha, too—I guess (only tidbit gifts, of course). I'm broke!

Steff Redding did come by. She brought me a gift too. The gift gesture kind of surprised me. She also brought "Texas Temptress" by Jean Haught (the paperback book that she supposedly wrote). We ate lunch at Elsie's Café and had a nice talk. The hour went by very fast.

It was 2PM before I knew it and we were off for our San Francisco Touring Adventure. First, we went to the Cable Car Barn, then inside some Submarine near Pier 43 ½. We went to some Fortune Cookie factory on Otis near South Van Ness. Last—but not least—we dined near Union Street. It was a good dinner. We all had a fun time.

By 8:30PM I was home. I telephoned Chad, leaving him a message:
"I just wanted to tell you that I'm heading over to the gym. Maybe I'll see you there. Oh—I have tomorrow as a day off, too."

As it turned out, Stephanie Bautista (my boss), had ripped me off a day with pay; whereby, I just decided to take the day off tomorrow (Thursday). Why not just take the next available day off?

While at the gym I was on my second set with lifting weights when I looked up and saw Chad walking in my direction. I had seen Leonard Perillo's BMW outside but I didn't see him in the gym.

Chad and I talked a bit and then I decided to go outside, terminating my work out. While I was outside, some guy named Bill asked for a ride home to Castro Valley. I took him and then followed Chad to his house. Chad received a voice mail message from a couple of gal friends. These girls were going to SHAKERS in Hayward, so we decided to go there.

When we arrived at SHAKERS we saw no sign of these girls.  The place was 'dead', so we left and dropped by some other bar.  We walked out of that place, too.  I ended up spending the night with Chad at his pad in Castro Valley.



"Notice how she sticks around?  Women don't stick around unless they like you!"
-RED, 2010 Film
starring Bruce Willis, Mary Louise Parker, Helen Mirren, John Malkovich

Mingling With the Crowd

"When you want something you forget everything else."
-as heard while watching the 2008 German film
"NORTH FACE"

Twenty-five years ago today

December 10, 1985
Tuesday

I am wearing the new scarf I bought that I thought was "me" at MACY's San Francisco. I saw it when I was with Chad last Saturday.

It's hard to floss my teeth regularly. I always forget. I have a dentist appointment on January 9th, so I better floss regularly!

I telephoned Chad this afternoon. I was hoping he'd be home but he wasn't. I left word with Larry.
"Oh, just let him know I called," I said.

I went with Margaret Lai after work to the Pac Tel Info Systems Open House. I met Emmalene Yee. We drank wine and champagne. We ate sushi and other hors d'oeuvres. It was fun mingling with the crowd. Margaret enjoyed it.

I returned to the office and Dale Orlando was waiting for me. We had to continue on with our committee functions. We had to deal with buying door prizes at Price Club for our Christmas Cruise. We arrived at Price Club at about 8:15PM. It was a mad house there! We saw Michelle there. She was kind of rude to me. I was glad when it was all over. Dale and I chose a number of pretty good door prizes. When we went off over something or another and I didn't say a whole lot to him. I still feel he's a big asshole.

I was home by 10:15PM. I was just getting in to bed when I figured I should give Chad a phone call. He may have returned my call. As it turned out he was just falling asleep.
"No, its okay, I'm glad to hear from you," Chad said deliriously.
"Really?" I asked.
"Yes, where were you all night?"
I explained.  Rest-assured we ended up having a restful, caring conversation. I learned he has two finals tomorrow (History and Math).
Chad said groggily, "I have to wake up at 4:30 in the morning."
And so, we didn't say a whole lot except the general mushiness.


I went to sleep. Chad went to sleep.

"We're a fixture!"
-Audrey Hepburn
in the 1967 film "Two For The Road"

A Charming Chum

"From now on we don't copy, we examine, we probe."-Hugh Dancy
"Confessions of a Shopaholic", 2009 Film

Twenty-five years ago today

December 9, 1985
Monday

Steph Redding won $1000 in the Lottery. She's coming to San Francisco on Wednesday to meet me for lunch.

There was a big bash this morning, getting everyone at the office all riled up about selling in order to make a 10,000 sales point day. I did my usual contact handling. If I sell…I sell.

Margaret invited me to a stockholder's luncheon at the Meridien Hotel tomorrow.
"Sure, I'll go," I said, smiling.
It's an hour and a half luncheon. It sounds good to me.

Then Emmaleane from Pac Tel Info Systems asked, "Why don't you come by our store because we're having an Open House between five and seven tomorrow night?"
"I'll try and be there!"

Then there's the San Francisco Tour and Dinner on Wednesday. And then there's our Company Cruise on Saturday! It's just one party thing after another—or so it seems.

I went to the gym right after work, arriving at 6:30PM. I left at 8PM, feeling like I had a fair work out.

When I arrived home Stephanie Redding telephoned. She's such a lonely woman. She calls me so much. She is an enlightening spirit, so I love her as my friend.

I didn't telephone Chad. I did think about the both of us. I miss him. I wrapped his birthday gift. I clipped magazine pictures and other clip art from other sources. He should love it. He'll probably love the wrap-job more than the gift.

I refrained from calling Chad for I know he is cramming on finals. He'll do well.

I hate it when I feel an argument coming on when Chad is being disagreeable or vice versa. I shouldn't let it bug me. I'm learning to speak out over whatever issue comes up that affects us. He is a charming chum. I like it when he says, "I think of you." If he becomes my roommate I'll really enjoy that. I am beginning to be able to actually fall asleep with him while he's around. We both had no trouble with our Sunday Afternoon nap yesterday. Sleeping comes natural when one is truly exhausted.

"It takes experience to be careful."
-"Shall We Kiss",
2007 French Film

The Last Time

PHOTO Collage:
Mary Genoveva Leyba-Lucero
"A relationship is like a shock. It has to constantly move forward or it dies."
-Woody Allen to Diane Keaton on a TWA Flight
"Annie Hall", 1977 Film

Today, December 8, 2010 is the MEMORIAL Service for my maternal grandmother, Mary Genevieve Leyba-Lucero in San Leandro, CA. She was born on July 10, 1913 in Cerrillos, New Mexico and passed away on December 5, 2010 in Walnut Creek, California.  She will be greatly missed by her children, grandchildren and many great and great-great children.

Below is a bit of insight about my grandmother's maiden name (LEYBA) and her married name (LUCERO).

The surname LEYBA has been identified by the Holy Office of the Catholic Church of Spain as a Sephardic (Jewish) surname. If you are interested in researching this aspect of the LEYBA family line, you are invited to visit Sephardim.com, located at http://www.sephardim.com
The LUCERO name originates in SPAIN.  The surname LUCERO in New Mexico translates to "The Morning Star" (the planet Venus) or "El Lucero de la Manana". The work "luz" (pronounced luce) means "light or candlelight". There is a Coat of Arms for the LUCERO name that is available throught the Historical Research Center. It has a knights armor with three feathers on top. There is bright yellow, smiling sun on the shield. It is of royal blue and bright yellow color.

Spelling variations of this family name include: Lucero, Lucío, Lucio, Luz, de Luz, de la Luz, Luzío, de Luzío, Luzio and many more.

First found in Aragon, an important Christian kingdom of medieval Spain.

Some of the first settlers of this family name or some of its variants were: Early migrants to the New World included Juan Luz, who sailed to America in 1527; Francisco de Luzío sailed to Guatemala in 1538; Alonso de Luz sailed to Peru in 1592.

The Lucio name is also quite common in Italy.

Twenty-five years ago today

December 8, 1985
Sunday

On Sunday morning at 10:30AM Chad and I finally got up out of bed. We went bicycling to Ole's Waffle Shop. We shared a great breakfast or so I thought.
Chad announced, "That's the last time I want to go there because I prefer a quiet setting on Sunday mornings."
I would have to concur with that statement.

After our breakfast we walked our bikes and browsed through a few Park Street stores. We gave South Shore Shopping Center a quick run over, too. We returned to my house where we both took a nap together. Then we got up and ________.

 I drove Chad home to Castro Valley.
Then we went to the Ice-Cream Dock for avocado cheeseburgers. We returned to my place. All in all there was a lot of good that took place over the weekend. Chad did claim I 'cut him down' and made him feel foolish a few too many times. He may have been correct. Perhaps I was a bit harsh but then maybe it was because of Friday night. He made me feel hurt inside (especially when he doesn't allow me to touch. He's working on it though. Things will hopefully blow over for the best.
I stopped at my mom and dad's house on the way back. Mom and Dad were involved in a movie, so I left not long after my arrival (thirty minutes to be exact).

Once home I telephoned Chad.
"I just want to wish you a happy month-a-versary."
We both forgot.
"Good night."
"Good night."

"Let's start over."
-as heard in the 1997 Hong Kong film
HAPPY TOGETHER

Communicate and Dissect

"Actions have consequences."
-Dollhouse, Season I
Episode I, Ghost

Twenty-five years ago today

December 7, 1985
Saturday

It was 1:30AM when we finally left Chad's parents' house.

Chad and I proceeded to my house. My feelings were hurt by Chad though. I guess I felt that way because 'he does me' and 'I can't do him'. There are compromises but I sometimes feel that I'm getting the raw end of the deal. It's still early in our relationship. We've only been together for about a month. We will see what transpires between now and the next six months. I want our relationship to last, so we must communicate and dissect each problem. I'll need to talk to him the next time I feel a need—or whenever a feeling arises where things are not being fair.

We fell asleep by about 4:30AM only to wake up at 11AM or so. We met Suzy Miller at Ole's Waffle Shop on Park Street at about 11:45AM. The three of us ate breakfast together. Then Chad and I left for the MOSCONE CENTER to the International Car Show. I liked the Jaguar, the Aston-Martin and the Cougar the best. Chad liked the Porsche. We grabbed a bite to eat at Walgreen's (eight Reese's Peanut Butter Cups, chocolate milk and a Diet-Coke).  Chad has an addiction to Diet-Coke.

We browsed at EMPORIUM and some other shops. It was fun to just look around. Before long it was 8PM, so we decided to head on up to BAXTER's in Concord. Chad and I met Denise Vinsonhaler who happened to be there with some of her girlfriends. We danced and had a pretty good time. Chad ended up meeting some gal named Jenny.

Chad and I ended up leaving BAXTER's and the normal closing time (1:30AM). Our 'unity' was reaffirmed. It amazed me to learn that Chad had never been to an establishment of that sort before. Oh well… We went to my house and had a couple of climactic episodes, then fell asleep.

"You have to be convinced to be convincing."
-Remember Me, My Love (2003, Italian Film)
aka "Ricordati di me"