Jennifer Flanders's Blog, page 38

How Will You Be Remembered?

An interviewer once asked Nobel Laureate Toni Morrison how she had become such a great writer. Did she study a particular method? Read books to hone her craft? Study under famous authors?

To which Morrison laughed and replied, "Oh, no, that is not why I am a great writer. I am a great writer because when I was a little girl and walked into a room where my father was sitting, his eyes would light up. That is why I am a great writer. There isn't any other reason."*

I find this story both encouraging and convicting. Encouraging, because it shows what a profound effect this man's love for his daughter had upon her development. Convicting, because it begs the question, How will my children will remember me?

Will they remember a mother who took utter delight in their company? Or one who was too distracted to notice when they entered a room?

Will they recall eyes that danced as she listened to their stories with unfeigned interest? Or eyes that drifted back to an iPhone or computer screen before half a dozen words were uttered?

Will their minds replay the unceasing stream of affirmation, love, encouragement, and respect that flowed from their mother's lips? Or will they be haunted by criticism, disapproval, and remarks made in anger or frustration?

Will they envision a mother who willingly laid aside projects, plans, and pastimes whenever she heard them call, "Look, Mom! Watch me, Mom! Mom! You've got to see this…"? Or will they remember a mom too busy to be bothered?

Will they remember a mother who smiled?

The mother I want my children to remember in the future is the mother I must be in the here and now.

How do you want your children to remember you? What steps will you take today to make today to make those memories happen?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Further reading on related topics, may I suggest:

One Awesome Piece of Advice Every Parent Should Know by Darlene Schacht (The Time Warp Wife)

Missing More Than Life by Rachel Stafford (Hands Free Mama)

The Interrupted Life by Charlotte Siems (This Lovely Place)

*As quoted by Nancy Campbell on page 362 of her newest book, CHEER UP!

A Good Reminder

I don't think this means to pray hardest when we're in the most trouble. Most of us find it pretty easy to pray when we need God to get us out of a tight spot. For me, this quote means that I need to pray hardest when I'm . . .

. . . exhausted

. . . excited

. . . angry

. . . anxious

. . . annoyed

. . . busy

. . . behind

. . . distracted.

When is it hardest for you to pray? Let's work harder at remembering at that moment to pray for God's strength, comfort, wisdom, and grace.

Pray without Ceasing

I've been meditating on 1 Thess. 5:17 lately: "Pray without ceasing." Try as I might to maintain a continual attitude of prayer, I get distracted by the million other things that vie for my attention. Consequently, I often lose sight of that goal.

Yet my days are sprinkled with enough mindless tasks that it's easy to pick up the conversation with God wherever I left off, provided I make a point to do so. Some of my favorite multi-tasking opportunities include praying while:

folding laundry
climbing stairs
washing dishes
nursing babies
riding bikes
taking showers
falling asleep

When and where do you squeeze in extra prayer time? Please share. I'm eager to add to my list!

NYNY Week 1: Pray without Ceasing

I've been meditating on 1 Thess. 5:17 lately: "Pray without ceasing." Try as I might to maintain a continual attitude of prayer, I get distracted by the million other things that vie for my attention. Consequently, I often lose sight of that goal.

Yet my days are sprinkled with enough mindless tasks that it's easy to pick up the conversation with God wherever I left off, provided I make a point to do so. Some of my favorite multi-tasking opportunities include praying while:

- folding laundry

- climbing stairs

- washing dishes

- nursing babies

- riding bikes

- taking showers

- falling asleep

When and where do you squeeze in extra prayer time? Please share. I'm eager to add to my list!

A New Year/ A New You

Even in grade school, my favorite section of the library was the "how-to" shelf. While my friends were reading their way through all 175 volumes of Nancy Drew, I was checking out book after book on crafting and building and drawing and sewing.

It was not until I'd finished all the projects in McCALL'S GIANT GOLDEN MAKE IT BOOK that I came across a curious manuel entitled A NEW YOU, all about the benefits of regular face-washing and how to do a proper push-up.

I devoured it cover to cover.

It wasn't that I was dissatisfied with the "old me," but the book fell into my hands just as puberty was setting in. I'd like to think that reading it helped me navigate the attendant changes with a little more confidence and grace, despite the fact that my "awkward stage" was, by all other accounts, rather protracted.

So I rechecked the book about thirteen weeks in a row and would have kept it indefinitely had our school librarian not insisted I find something new to read and suggested I try ISLAND OF THE BLUE DOLPHINS, (which I likewise loved).

All this to say, the idea of self-improvement has intrigued me for almost forty years now. I normally start every January with a ridiculously long list of resolutions, but this year, I'm taking a different tack. I still have lots of areas that need attention, but I'm not going to tackle them all at once. Instead, I'll take the entire year to focus on one improvement at a time. Since it takes roughly two weeks to establish a new habit, by the end of 2012, I'll have made 26 lasting changes. Doesn't that sound doable?

And since it is only by the grace of God that any endeavor meets with success, I plan to focus first on cultivating a more vibrant prayer life. Anybody care to join me? I plan to post plenty of how-to's, progress reports, and other inspiring thoughts along the way, so check back in and let me know how it is going, okay?

Twelve Things I Love About Winter

1. Crackling logs

2. Mistletoe

3. Church pageants

4. Hot chocolate

5. Christmas carols

6. Shoebox stuffing

7. Cards and letters

8. Family traditions

9. Fantasy fudge

10. Snowflakes

11. Evergreen wreaths

12. New year's resolutions

Our Family's Newest Christmas Tradition

After our six-year-old was diagnosed with diabetes just before Thanksgiving, our family was invited to take part in a study aimed at discovering the cause of Type 1 diabetes and finding ways to prevent it. We were great candidates — twelve biologically-related children in a single family, three of whom have Type 1.

When we first agreed to be screened, we assumed we were signing up for a one-time finger prick, but it was actually more involved than that. A full vial of blood was required from each child, as well as from their father and our grandsons. (Luckily Unfortunately, I missed the age cut-off by a few months myself and was therefore ineligible to participate).

The staff who were taking the samples were very kind and extremely good at what they do. They made it easy for our children to bravely submit to the blood draws, although we're all grateful we don't have to endure four blood tests and four shots a day like their brothers. If any of the screens come back positive, we'll get to do this all over again. If they are negative, guess what? The kids can still come back every year for another blood draw until they turn eighteen.

So we're adding this event to our "Christmas Countdown Calendar." It's our newest Christmas tradition, and one we'd highly recommend to any other family affected by Type 1 diabetes.

Mixed Blessings

…. Life took yet another unexpected turn the day before Thanksgiving when our excessively thirsty Daniel tested positive for diabetes. That brings the tally to three children with Type 1, all diagnosed during major holidays. What are the odds? Daniel took the news like a real trooper, although he has since asked, "Mommy? When do I get to stop having diabetes?" The answer is that, unless a cure is found, he will have it for the rest of his life.

I think it is significant that Daniel's diagnosis came at a time traditionally set aside for counting blessings and giving thanks. It's easy to express gratitude for obvious graces like warm homes, good jobs, sound minds, and full bellies, but Scripture bids us count it all joy when we encounter hardships, as well (James 1:2-3), knowing that our Heavenly Father loves us and can be trusted, even amid tragedy, to work all things together for good (Romans 8:28).

So this year, we are also thanking God for His purpose and plan in allowing into our lives some things we would not have willingly chosen for ourselves—things like diabetes and miscarriage and broken bones (five of them in five different kids!). But God is good all the time, and we can see His hand of mercy at work even now. Won't you join us in offering up a sacrifice of praise this season?

Putting It in Perspective

I don't know who wrote the following poem, but it is a good reminder that we should "not despise the day of small things." God knows this season of life will be gone before we know it, and won't I miss it when it is!.

[image error]My days are days of small affairs,

Of trifling worries, little cares,

A lunch to pack, a tea to make,

A room to sweep, a pie to bake,

A hurt to less, a tear to dry,

A head to brush, a bow to tie,

A face to wash, a rent to mend,

A meal to plan, a fuss to end,

A hungry husband to be fed,

A sleepy child to put to bed.

I, who'd hoped someday to gain

Success, perhaps a bit of fame,

Must give my life to small affairs

Of trifling worries, little cares.

But, should tomorrow bring a change,

My little house grow still and strange—

Should all the cares I have today

Be swept, quite suddenly, away—

Where now a hundred duties press

Be but an ache of loneliness,

No child's gay ribbons to be tied,

No wayward little feet to guide,

To heaven I would raise my prayers,

"Oh God, give back my little cares."

~Author Unknown

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Twelve Things I Love About Fall

1. New school books

2. Pumpkin patches

3. Bulky sweaters

4. Sharp yellow pencils

5. Round, rosy apples

6. Crsip, clean air

7. Wood smoke

8. Thanksgiving dinner

9. Marching bands

10. State fairs

11. Tent camping

12. Hay rides