Jude Stringfellow's Blog, page 51

Happy Birthday Baby Boy!

 OK, so no one is allowed to tell Reuben that I called him Baby Boy, OK? Thanks. So yeah, 37 years ago today I was in a lot of pain.  It's actually about the time I was in the middle of pushing. I delivered my firstborn child at 12:34 p.m. on March 22, 1986.  He was a long and skinny fella.  He came shoulder first on his first attempt at coming out, and the doctor had to reach in and give him a bit of a clue as to how to actually make his entrance. There was a joke however, at that time I didn't find it very funny, but it was...the doctor said to me, "Looks like you have yourself a lineman!"  LOL...yeah, really funny, and no, let's just get through this, OK!!  

    Reuben Andrew Stringfellow was born at 12:34 p.m. and he was 21" long and weighed just under 7 pounds. He was 6 pounds and 15 ounces. He was my longest and lightest baby.  He was already in command at the time of his birth, having been conceived EXACTLY 9 months to the day from the day he arrived. He's really always been that way; quite on time, precise, and punctual. He (nor I) is ever late.  At least I managed to get one of my kids to their destinations and appointments on time. Thank you, Reuben.

    Reuben was named after my father, Reuben Wayne Stringfellow. My father was named after his father, Reuben Jefferson Stringfellow. There are quite a few REU in the family. I believe my son is #17. There was one guy that named all of his 5 sons the same thing, using their middle names as the name they went by. My son's middle name is Andrew, named after my sister Andralyn.  So, since Andrew means "Masculine" and Reuben means "Behold a Son" My son is a masculine son to be beheld. So true.  I appreciate EVERY SINGLE DAY how God made him both strong-willed and strong-bodied. Reuben is an amazing fellow, and if you haven't met him you should do that. You'll be impressed. (I'm not biased, I promise)

    Since the day of his birth, Reuben has had a few traits that separate him from others. He is stubborn like me. He likes to have things HIS WAY, and I don't blame him. When he was starting school, and I do mean the first day of Kindergarten, he was dragged out of the school by his teacher. She presented him to me and stated that Reuben insisted on sitting in a particular chair even though she had assigned it to someone else. He literally traded his chair for the other one. Then, (the same day) he put all of the toys in size (or shape) order along the wall and told everyone that they were to be put back after they were played with.  The teacher told me that day my son had A.D.D. and he needed to be tested.  

    Reuben was tested at 6, 7, 8, 9, and finally 10.  EVERY single year the teachers INSISTED that he had A.D.D. and needed medication. EVERY single year he was tested and the doctors said no. Finally, when he was 10 the doctor wrote on his chart "This is a normal 10-year-old boy. Any teacher that can't handle him needs to find another profession."  I thought that was hilarious, but I did continue to discipline him when his teachers called me up to the school to discuss his dominant and commanding ways.  The boy was literally lining students up, telling them where to play, how to play, when to play, etc.  He's still doing that, only in the Oklahoma National Guard, having served several years in the Regular Army. Yep, he knew when he was little that he was going to be in charge. 

    In High School, and I guess in Middle School as well, Reuben played football. Guess what, he was a lineman!!  He did very well and was even invited by Bob Stoops himself, to attend the 2001 training camp in Norman. That was the year the Sooners took the National championship. Reuben couldn't hardly contain himself. I took him down every day for a week or so. He had the most fun ever. He played High School ball, and they went to the state play offs every year. When he was out of the Army and at the Indiana National Guard he played for the local club called the Marion Crusaders, and they took the National Championship in their division. Again, he was a lineman. 

    He graduated high school, worked for a year, then joined the U.S. Army. He's been in the military since September 21, 2006, and is about to become an E7 First Sgt. I am so very very proud of my son. He's made a couple of tours, and he's been stationed overseas for years. He's been home for a few years now and works for himself by selling insurance. Just last week he went to Los Cabos, Mexico, and was honored and recognized by the CEO and CFO of the company for his outstanding work. I am not surprised. He moved up to District Regional Manager in just under two years.   WOOT!!

Happy Birthday, son!!  I love you. 

Delight Yourself in the Lord.

 If you know me, you know my all-time favorite verse in the Bible, which is Psalms 37:4.  I like the next one too, but I REALLY get into the promise of Psalms 37:4.  The Bible doesn't say it, but we assume that David wrote this passage (maybe it says it, but I haven't seen where it is said) and it is so very simple.  Do this, and God will do that. If you do this, God will do that.  The Bible says, "Delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart."  It goes on to say in the next verse, "Commit your way unto Him, and He will bring it to pass."  So that's really a reiteration of the first promise. The writer is telling you to do something, and when you do it, God will do something. God doesn't lie. Don't think He can. He can't. The writer knew this and wrote if you are happy in God and show it, He will bring your heart's desires. I am one of the MOST selfish people in the world...because of this one verse. I want my desires, I want them more than most things, and so, in order to have them, I only have to do one thing....the easiest thing ever, and that is to delight in God.  Done!

    One of the things I have found that brings so very much joy, fun, happiness, and yes, delight, is reading the Bible as it is written in the Scots language. I'm not talking about Scots Gaelic; I have that version as well, but the Scots language is a real language, and the New Testament has been translated into the Scots language, making it both fantastic and wonderful. I have too much fun reading it, and every time I do I LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE it. I laugh, I whoop, and I get really silly happy because of the way my mouth has to twist and pucker up just to say some of the words. I get the biggest kick out of it, and it really brings home the fact that my ancestors were both Believers and they talked funny! I am getting so good at reading Scots!!  I can't say it out loud really, not without sounding sort of stupid, and I would never try to do it in front of native speakers. I just read it, and I giggle to myself; unless I'm near someone.  If I'm near someone they have to hear me laugh; it's gonna happen.

    I'll post a single page from my Kindle so you can see what I'm talking about; you'll have to try it. I bought the New Testament in book form about four years ago, and I've been learning to read it faster and faster. It took me months to get past the first 10-15 pages. I was constantly looking up words to see what they meant, and then I'd read it again and again and try to do it without stopping. After as much time as I've put into it, I can say that I can read the Scots language so much better than I used to, and I wish I could speak it. I really do. I pull out a word now and again, but I don't have it down like I want to. Ay canna dae it.  But I do try.

    So, what are my heart's desires? Well, to be perfectly honest with you, that's none of your beeswax.  It's all going to be kept a big fat secret between me and God. He knows me. He knows my heart. He knows my wants, my wishes, my dreams, my desires, He knows it all. I'll just sit back against the mega pillows I have stacked on the bed, and pull up a dog to share my giggles with.  I have the New Testament on my Kindle now, so I read it from there. I lent the book out to my friend who said she simply had to try it. She's returned it, but not until she purchased her own copy!! It's just so much to take in, but worth every minute of every hour or every session. I try to read at least five pages a day. It's not hard now. I remember when I couldn't get one read without spending four hours diving into the Scots/English dictionary trying to figure out what I was reading. The Scots Gaelic version has the Scots Gaelic on one side and English on the other. This is simply just Scots. (LOVE IT)

    Since I know God to be 100% honest, true, and worthy, I'll not worry one bit about my heart and its desires. They're already being brought to me. It's a done deal. God can't lie. I just have to wait for the right time(s) but that's OK, I have all of eternity. No worries. Dinna fash! 

Photo Credit: Me 

FIRST WORLD ISSUE - - Cellular Phone Expense RANT.

 Every now and again, I am woefully reminded of just how ignorant I really am. I don't know if you know this, but being woefully ignorant never really makes me happy. In fact, it can have the very opposite result on my psyche. I can actually become upset. I don't want to become upset, so what I do is just rant here, taking all of my frustrations about the world and its issues out on my poor bald (blank) keyboard. If you don't know me, you don't know that my keyboard is about 10 years old, but I like it, so I don't replace it. It's one of the first curvy ones and almost all of the numbers and letters are completely rubbed off of it. The damn thing needs to be replaced, but it works, so yeah; not going to get another one. I don't even know if they make them now. This is another First World Issue and not the one I'm ranting about today.

    Today, I am ranting about my phone bill. I have U.S. Cellular, and I may stay with them for another four months until my phone is paid off, or I may pay off my phone and just switch to Consumer Cellular. I haven't made the decision yet. I called Consumer Cellular (CC) and asked them what their plans cost, and I was quite impressed with their answer. I never ever go over 3G of data so I can get the 5G plan for $25.00 and as long as my phone is owned and not financed, I can get away with just paying $25.00 + state and local taxes. We're talking $32.00 tops.  I have been paying $138.00 a month. WHY? I'll tell you why.  That's why I'm ranting.

    About a year or so ago, I went into the U.S. Cellular store here in Oklahoma City, and I spoke with a person who sold me on a LIE that I needed the insurance for my financed phone. She said it was mandatory, I never questioned her because having full coverage insurance on your car is required in our state if it is financed. I could have and I should have checked. I don't throw my phone. I don't ever put my phone into a bad situation; not that something bad can't happen, but I was paying $14.99 a month JUST for the coverage and if my phone was lost or stolen, I would have had to pay another $109.00 I believe, to have it replaced. I think that's what she said, it could have been more. That's not the real issue here. The REAL issue is that I was paying $10 a month (for more than 35 months) for an iPad tablet to be used with 1G of data and another $14.99 for insurance on it. I had NO NO NO idea that I was paying that because at the time I bought the new phone, I specifically asked and the lady told me no I wasn't paying for the tablet. I told her I better not be because I hadn't used it in almost two years at that time. THAT WAS A YEAR AGO.

    The ONLY reason I even realized I was actually paying for the tablet, is the woman I spoke to tonight about canceling the service told me I had the tablet on the bill. She was able to take off 3 months but not the 35 I have been paying. I'll have to write to corporate about that, and I will. I am livid. I am simply beside myself, so rather than freak out, blow up, and/or otherwise meltdown, I decided to make a really cool chicken tortilla casserole, and write this blog. I do that. I cook. I get in that kitchen, I find things, I mix things, I make things, and then I get on the computer and bitch! It makes me smile, the dog isn't kicked, and no one has to put up with my ranting unless you read my ranting, then you do. You'll be OK. I promise. The casserole is delicious. 

    Bottomline. I went from paying $138 to paying $63 since I am still paying for the phone.  I'll end up paying $29.99 for unlimited service, even though I never go over 3G and the CC has a $25.00 service. I don't mind paying another $4.99 to U.S. Cellular until I can get my phone paid off. I may just do it. I'm that way. I get a burr up under the saddle and I don't stop until it's gone. I may just pay it off and switch. I have a mind to do that. I was REALLY happy and pleased with the customer service woman Amanda. She was tops, and I told her I would leave her good reviews. She pointed out that I was paying too much for insurance on a phone that was almost paid off, she recommended I keep the insurance, but I have my phone insured under my renter's policy. If it is stolen it will be covered. If it is broken...well, that's when it may end up getting stolen, but I probably won't lie. I don't do that very well.

    Anyway, I'm down to paying a reasonable amount now. After the phone is paid off I can either switch to Consumer Cellular or stay with U.S. Cellular, and it will be either $25 or $29. and of course taxes. That's a whole lot better than what I've been digging in my purse for these past three long damn years. That's it, that's my rant. I'm done, and the food is ready, so I'm off to the kitchen. Check your plans people, don't be an igmo like me.

Photo Credit: Pagedesignpro.com 

Scorpio November 22. JUST FOR FUN.

 This is an article I found for fun. I don't really follow this stuff but some of it is really spot on. (Except the introverted part.)

https://scorpiomystique.com/november-22/

Scorpio Born on November 22

Scorpios born on November 22 barely made the cut into Scorpio Season. In fact, it all depends on their exact time of birth. Similarly to the October 23 Scorpios, these Scorpios are cusp babies, absorbing the energies of both Scorpio and Sagittarius into their complex and dynamic personalities. These Scorpios demonstrate that they possess the physical stamina of Sagittarius, and the spiritual wisdom of the more introverted Scorpios, making them the best of both worlds.

If you were born on November 22, you have a very strong and stubborn personality. People tend to follow your lead, because even if you are not quite sure of what you are doing, you do it with confidence and assertiveness. You know how to both play the system and play your own rules, and this allows you to outsmart your competitors without making them realize how far ahead of the game you are. You are witty, sarcastic, spontaneous and remarkably intelligent.

You love connecting with those around you and merging with them, but you also always fiercely protect your individuality and freedom. You do not like to feel stifled, coddled or clung on to. You want to have the freedom to spread your wings, explore whatever your heart desires, and then come back to your loved ones to tell them of your adventures. Ideally, your social group is full of equally adventurous and risk-taking people, not only physically but also emotionally and personally.

November 22 Scorpios thrive in action-oriented careers such as sports, or those which allow them to exercise their mental muscles, such as politics, law or education. Full of strong opinions and an ability to say things as they are, these Scorpios are a breath of fresh air when it comes to how hopeful they can be. However there will always be a part of November 22 Scorpios which remains locked away in their Scorpio world, and no one will ever fully know who they are. This blend of being open and being mysterious makes November 22 Scorpios extremely intriguing creatures, full of sexuality and charm.

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There you have it  -- or me.

Photo Credit: Sunsigns.org

Virgo and Scorpio....Who Knew?

 So you know, as a Christian, I don't put too much stock into the whole Zodiac thing, but I do believe that it has some merit in the area of personality traits. I don't read a horoscope, I don't follow the stars (even though God made them) and I don't think I will end up with fame and fortune just because a scrolled-up piece of paper says so; which can be altered to fit any and all zodiac signs. What I do believe is that there are certain times of the year that a person is born and that these dates and times can have an influence on the way they believe, think, or feel. For instance, I was born in the Autumn, and Autumn just happens to be my favorite time of year.  My best friend was born on the first full day of Summer, and she loves Summer more than any other season. All that being said; let's get into the fun stuff.

    I have been single since March 31, 1999.  That's right, I've not had a single date since the 20th Century!!  I'm OK with that fact really, I have had the best friends ever, the best kids ever, the best dogs ever, and of course, I'm not ever really alone. I have me, and I'm enough. I decided for fun to read a book (on Kindle) about the most complete you...or me.  It was saying that a Scorpio woman (I am one. I was born on the last day of Scorpio on the last day they counted November 22 as a Scorpio) can be one of two types of Scorpio.  Who knew there are two types of Scorpios (apparently the only sign with this)?  I found out I am an EAGLE and not a belly crawler. What that means is I look out for others with a fury and viciousness that other Scorpios use to look out for themselves.  Again, who knew? 

    I am reading the book and it says I need a Virgo man to complete myself. If I had a man at all, he would or should be a Virgo according to the book and their gurus who do actually follow this stuff.  They list the reasons as "opposites attract" but that they also have many traits in common. Both signs are intelligent, intellectual, and independent, but that they also love being a part of a union, they want to be mated and mated for life. That was interesting to see because I have chosen NOT to date for that very reason. I will NOT date anyone, but I may marry them. I will mate, but it will be for life, none of this temporary crap; it's all or nothing. So far, it's been a whole lot of nothing, and I' not crying about it.  

    The Virgo man has a few traits that other zodiac signs don't appreciate apparently, but the Scorpio (the Eagle Scorpio) actually desires and hopes for in a man. One such trait is being a neat freak, a bit OCD, because the Scorpio is too busy living to slow down long enough to make the bed. The Scorpio isn't upset about a frame being crooked but doesn't mind if the Virgo goes around straightening things, or organizing the refrigerator. The Eagle Scorpio will not only allow the Virgo to clean, organize, straighten, streamline, and/or otherwise make ready, but they will adhere to the program and do their best not to disrupt the flow, whereas a belly crawler Scorpio will intentionally disrupt and destroy the work of the Virgo, so the Virgo (according to the book) needs to be sure he/she has found the EAGLE type before jumping into bed with them...which is another trait that the Eagle finds interesting about the Virgo. Let's go there.

    According to the book, the Virgo (especially the men) are a bit kinky. They are shy and introverted in public, but in the bedroom, they can be open, naughty, and even a bit unorthodox. The Scorpio (any of them) is open to this as long as the lovemaking is very very very monogamous. The one thing a Scorpio won't tolerate is a cheater or a swinger. Strangely, with Scorpio being the zodiac with the most famous libido, it's also known for its monogamy as well. I can see that. I divorced a man for his infidelity, and I won't be fooled again. I'm open to experimenting, exploring, and having the best of times but only with my soulmate. Maybe I should be on the lookout for a Virgo man....a bearded Virgo man....a quiet musician-type bearded Virgo man with only eyes for me. Why a musician? Well, I want to learn how to play the guitar for one thing, and he can teach me...while he's naked and hanging upside down if that's what he wants to do.

    Another trait that attracts the Eagle to a Virgo is that the Virgo is a clean man/woman. They like taking showers and wearing deodorant. They feel complete when they have a bit of perfume or cologne on; but not too much. I like that. I like being clean, and I want my man to be clean, but then again, if I can get a bearded musician with haunting eyes and a big grin to roll down the hill with me and end up in the mud I'm OK with that too. I do like kilted bearded quiet musicians with haunting smiles and bedroom eyes...and dirty black boots....and if he's hungry and wants to be fed, I'm really into that. I like to cook.  I really don't care if he's a Virgo, but the book says I need one, there's that. 

    Yet another trait the Virgo man/woman has that the Eagle Scorpio appreciates is that they are workaholics and don't always need to be cuddled or held constantly. They don't always come into the same room I'm in just to be with me. That's good. They don't like to stop working to eat, sleep, or hang out, and I'm OK with that too because I have things I'm doing. I don't have an inferiority or insecurity issue where I feel that I have to be in someone's presence to be theirs. I don't have to wear their ring, they don't have to wear mine. Their word is their word, and their actions are their actions, so if the bearded kilted musician with haunting grey eyes and dirty black boots decides to work another hour or so on something he's writing or thinking about writing, he can do that and I'll be on my Kindle when he's finished and wanting to scarf something down before he shows me how to strum his....strings...remember, I said I want him to teach me how to...you know, play the guitar.

    The last trait that the Eagle appreciates that the Virgo man/woman does that other zodiac signs either don't appreciate or refuse to assist with, is the fact that the Virgo becomes upset about something and will get really quiet and reserved. If they are upset with you (me) they pull away, and if they are upset with someone else they are still quiet, but will mention it over and over again in different ways, allowing the other person the opportunity to either ask them to discuss it or to let them know they are aware of the situation; the Eagle will say something like "I'm here if you want to talk about it" but the belly crawler will often blame the Virgo and say it's probably their fault...Virgos need to stay away from (anyone needs to stay away from) the belly crawlers.  It's OK bearded music man without your kilt, but who still has those boots on your feet while hanging upside down naked in the bedroom with your guitar --- I am here for you...if you need me. If you don't, I'll at least stick around and watch.

    https://thezodiac.com/eagle2.htm  (Eagle / Scorpio info) 

Photo Credit: Stocksy.com

You Get What You Get. I'm FINISHED.

 If I was 100% completely honest with you, I would have to tell you that I could probably go back over the manuscript another 3 or 4 times, but I'm not going to do it. I'm LEAVING IT alone, and if that means there are mistakes, then that's the way it will have to be. I'm just done. I've read the book "Of Kilted Pleasure" more than a dozen times from start to finish. I've been pouring over it, trying to find the tiny mistakes and I know (I just know) there are a few. I can't do it again.  I really should pay for an editor, but hey, where is the fun in that?

    Here's the thing. I am a human. I really am a basic individual. I write. I have money to publish, but not always to have the thing edited. When I had one or two things looked at for editing (back in the day) they wanted to change the story, change the plot, change this or that. I didn't write this or that. I wrote what I wrote. I have always been that way. Even in High School, when my creative writing teacher tried to tell me it would sound better if....I told her to write it if she preferred it that way. I asked her to think about grading it as if she wasn't trying to make me do things HER way. If she gave me anything less than an "A" I took it straight to the principal to claim she was discriminating against me for being a great writer and she was envious. YES, I have always been a writing diva.  The good news is, I'll leave your work alone. I won't try to ask you to write like I do. Have I won awards? Yes. I have won money, awards, scholarships, and other things. I don't talk about it because I think writing is too subjective to be pigeonholed. I took the money because I needed it but I NEVER gave my words to the buyer. NO ONE uses my words except me. THEY ARE MINE.

    That being said. I am selling my books for people to read, but no one can say they wrote "Of Kilted Pleasure" or anything else I wrote. In a very real sense, I created Aria, Ewan, Antoin (even though I fashioned Antoin using someone) and I created the plot, the story, the events, the places and the situations. No one gave me hints or clues; not even suggestions. I didn't know what I was going to write when I sat down to do the book. I knew Aria would have an imagined lover Craig Allan Mackenzie, and that's about it. Craig, by the way, is my personal imagined lover, we've been "married" for over 35 years. The Craig in the book is NOT the Craig in my mind. My Craig is rounder, and more robust. He's older, and he burps.  I'm getting to the point that I can actually understand one out of every 40 words he says too. My Scots Gaelic is getting so much better. "Tha mi aon cu agam".  It is true, I have one dog.

    So, the book is now sent off to the publisher. I'm not going to tweak it again. It is done. You get what you get, and if you go through it and find mistakes, please email me to let me know. I love that. I know, some people would hate it, but I love it. It keeps me humble.  I am having a fit with the illustrator at the moment, but it will work itself out, I'm sure. I paid for Level 3 and they sent me their rendition of what it should look like but they used a Level 1 drawing, of what can ONLY be described as a cartoon...a coloring book illustration. I'll post it.  I won't go into the battle I'm waging at the moment, but I know I'll hoist my flag soon enough. This old Southern wet hen won't stop pecking at their legs until I get my way. It's my money. It's my book. I won't even apologize for feeling that way. I'm not Canadian. 

    In about six weeks or so the book should be ready to buy online. I'd love to have control over what they charge, but again, I really don't. I think I'll try to get them to have it on sale for $1.99 a download for the first month, that way it can get out there. I think that's fair. The downloads are usually $5.99-7.99 on Kindle and the paperback will be $19.00-21.00.  I'm not doing a hardcover option on this book. It's a romance novel, come on!!  I think the Kindle is the way to go, it's cheaper, at your fingertips, and you can make the font bigger. OH...that's a good point to make; I did make the font bigger. I told them to make it 12 point, not 11. It makes a HUGE difference when you're reading it, and I used THIS font, which is GEORGIA. They had not done a book in Georgia before. I am the first. There you go!  It's just an easier wider font. I like it.  I hope you do too.

    Whew.  Done. Well, the manuscript is. Now we fight for the lovers to be painted and not displayed as something a child would take a crayon to.  Geez!

 

Photo DISCREDIT: Xlibris.com (I'll give her name if I don't get this settled)

Books I May Not End Up Writing.

 I'm about to submit "Of Kilted Pleasure" back to the publishers for its final go before it's made into an actual book. They've been so kind to me in terms of letting me go back through it a dozen times to make sure all of the mistakes are found, corrected, and that the spelling of the Scots words are right....or are they? Anyway, I have been reading some of the reviews given by random people who I've never met, who are giving my book a read before it hits the market. These are readers paid by the publisher, not myself. They give a genuine thought or comment about this or that. You take it with a grain of salt or you listen and end up stabbing yourself in the eye. I choose not to listen and just thank them for their candor.  Most of the people are NOT American, and they couldn't find Scotland on a flat map of the world.  To expect them to understand anything related to 18th Century Scotland would be a stretch.

    That being said, I was dreaming last night, which is something I do quite often, and I came up with an idea for a book that I may never write. Why? Why would I not write it? Well, because it was full of unbelievable truth and also unbelievable antics that would cause my readers to think I was that way. I'm not that way. I'm this way. To say that I am one way or the other would be difficult, but I'm certainly not going to go into prostitution to make my bills. I am NOT that way.  Sounds like an interesting read already doesn't it? Maybe I will write it. LOL

    As with all book ideas, there is NOTHING new under the Sun. It wouldn't matter if I told the world every idea I have, they can only duplicate it in THEIR way, not my way. It would NEVER have my humor, my spin, my thoughts, etc. I'm OK with telling the world that Susie had sex with Davy, and they were in Mikey's tree house at the time. They were both finishing college and both dating Patty. That's not the dream, but you get my drift. I could say anything at all, and someone could steal the idea but would it really be stealing? No. It's not really all that nice to take someone's idea, but unless you verbatimly (is that a word?) write out someone's book or idea, it's not stealing. You should however be cognitive that it could sound like the other book, and you should add your thoughts, ideas, spin, and/or humor. Just sayin'.

    So, the book I won't write, or may write deals with a school in the mid-west of the United States; we'll say Chicago.  There are dozens of teachers in the school, hundreds of kids, and a few administrators. That's the way it is all around the world. Nothing new there. The teachers are paid what they are paid, the benefits are so-so, and there is always room for improvement, so one or two teachers realize after having a tryst with the same man (for money) that they could benefit by combining their efforts, be on rotation, as it were, and collect the money from the man, not allowing him the time to go elsewhere. Sort of "keep it in the house".  This works, then they realize they could bring in more teachers who could use the supplement to their income. This leads to a full-blown pimp-house, and the teachers who started the mess can retire literally off the backs of their cohorts. 

    It was a dream, and I have to tell you, I laughed all the way through the thing. I wondered if it was wrong to even think it, but you can't help what you think when you dream. You can help with what you write, so I may not, but then again, I may. If someone else reading this takes the idea and makes $$$$$ off of it, go for it. I'm good with that. I'm just over here spitballing anyway. It could be that your story is better than mine ever would be. Or, it could be that I go back to this blog and use it to sue the pants off of you and make my money that way. It's all relative. You just never know. It would be a good book, it would be a fun book, it would be a sexy, sort of quirky book, but you know, it could also be dark, twisted, evil, and ominous. It could be spun any way you want to spin it. Throw in a Brit to make it that much funnier. 

    That was it, that was my dream. I may or may not write it, and I may or may not publish it if I do write it, but the thing is, it was a good idea. Someone else may have already had that idea. I wouldn't know. I got it from the fleshy tenant in my skull while the rest of me was in slumberland just checking out the new dirt roads that lead from the old barn out back to the new Oz out front. 

Photo Credit: Dreammeaning.online

I Work From Home.

 I work from home, and I don't ever want to go back into the "real world" to make a living. If the truth is told, I shouldn't have to, either. People throw out the current year all the time as if because it is THAT or THIS year, we should be doing this or that. OK, it's 2023, I don't want to have to get up at a certain time, get dressed, put makeup on, drive to work, fight traffic, get to the place, only to find it too cold or too hot, or that see that the others who work there can't be cordial, polite, or civil. I don't want to deal with people coming into the office to ask me something that could be handled in a text, email, or I don't know, by them doing their own due diligence! Guess what, buddy, there's an APP for that!  GET IT. USE IT. (I have to, everyone I know has to, and you can too. (I'll go ahead and say, "It's 2023!")

    When I work from home I don't get dressed for success, I'm dressed for work. I don't have to impress anyone by slathering on base, eye-shadow, lipstick, or blush. I won't wear mascara for anyone, so there's literally NO CHANCE of that happening. I don't have to, but if I have to, then the boss has to, and every damn person in the office is going to because no one is going to tell me that a WOMAN wears makeup. Think about it, I'm a right-wing conservative saying that; imagine if I were a left-wing liberal and the boss or someone else wanted me to wear makeup. I know my politics shouldn't come into it, but what if my religion forbids me to wear it? It doesn't, but that's not the point. The point is I work from home! Not one of my dogs or cats (not even my lizard) has asked me (or expected me) to dress and wear makeup. I still do my job, and I still do it well. There you go.

    I work from home. I chose to work from home so I don't have to fight traffic and put myself into lethal situations when idiots decide they're late and can't be bothered to drive like a human rather than a cretin. I can't tell you how many times I have literally counted how many accidents I've seen or passed on my way to and from work all because, or mainly because, someone decided to pass someone, or get by someone, or they decided that they were more important than the rest of us who are abiding by the rules and laws. Why do that if you don't have to? Driving to work takes literally 40-45 minutes each way, and I'm trading that time for NOTHING. I don't get paid for it, it's given away. I'm losing it, and not being compensated for it. If I were to suggest being compensated for it, I would be laughed at. Don't laugh at me, just acknowledge that I work from home. 

    I work from home and yes, I have dogs. You may hear a dog bark if you call the office number. You can survive that. At least you won't hear a co-worker cussing or the boss freaking out. You won't hear me saying "I'm sorry, I can't hear you, there's a train going by."  I mean, I could say that, but there aren't any trains, it's just me and the dogs, cats, the lizard, and my kid. She works from home too. You could hear her, but then you'd think I was at work, wouldn't you? You'd think she was a co-worker, and want to know more about the Australian woman in the background? My daughter is a voice-over actress.  She could be a robot, she could be a man, she could be a chipmunk. She could be a male chipmunk from Australia fighting with a robot. She's very talented. 

    By the way, I work from home so I can make better lunches, and not have to spend an hour away from the office either driving around or pretending that I have something to do so I'm out from under the pressures of co-workers and bosses. I work from home so I can get my coffee when I damn well, please. I can go poop and not have to worry about someone coming in behind me and making faces. I can dance, do squats, lift weights, and study my Financial Advising materials without wondering if I will be seen, heard, or interrupted. If I am interrupted by work, I do my work. It's my job and I do it. I don't take from one boss to give to another. I am the other. I work from home for one boss, and for myself.  I work from home because I can get much more done that way. Yes, there are distractions, but not the type that sends me over the moon screaming and wishing I was at home, because I am at home. My distractions are the Amazon man delivering something, or the neighbor wanting to take my dog for a spin because she recently lost hers.

    All in all, I am very happy to be an at homer. I literally roll out of bed, take the shower, and dress back in my jammies. I eat when I want to, drink as much coffee, good coffee, as I want to, and NO ONE...NO ONE tells me to smile, and they don't ask me to run an errand. NO ONE ever asks me to just run to the post office, or the bank, to pick up their dry cleaning, their kids, or anything. NOPE. I work from home because it's where I feel most comfortable, free, relaxed, and capable. I do a much better job from home and when the whistle blows and the day if done, I don't have to get into my car and fight traffic again. I make it home on time for dinner, and I have NO angst or anxiety from the trek. 

    If you think about it, the Pandemic taught us that we don't need to be out and about and mingling with people. So, I guess all of us right-wingers were correct, not that the big pharms or others will admit it; but it is good that we can use their own words against them now. I don't want to be around people who may be sick. They say they're OK, but they say that so they don't lose their jobs. Being home I can work through a cold or fever. I don't have to lose money and my boss gets the work done without having to wait on it. There really are about 10 good reasons to work from home, but the best one I can think of is that I CAN!

Photo Credit: Flexjobs.com

Waiting on the Interior Proof

 I get a lot of emails every day, certainly every week, asking me what the process is for writing and publishing. I've been privileged to have written more than 100 books, but people like to tell me that my personal journals don't really count. Are you kidding me? I go through a 300-page handwritten diary every six weeks. They do count. I may not have them published, but they do count. The process of writing is simple, you grab a book and a pen and you start unloading everything inside your head. You don't stop just because the clock says it's late. You get the thoughts OUT of your head. Then, because no one really rewrites their diary or journal, you move forward to the next day. I have always dated my entries, and I even say what time I'm writing, where I am, and what the weather is. Who knows, someone may someday want to use my writings to prove something. Did you know that most of what we know about Blackbeard the Pirate comes from his own journals? Truth.

    Well, the process of writing is that you write. You get it out of your head either on paper or on the screen. You just write. Prewriting is easiest because you can either just write without a direction, and say absolutely anything, or you can start off with an idea and build on it. I tend to have an idea if I'm writing a book. I don't jump in willy-nilly. I think I may end up writing a book about writing a book. I could do that.

    The prewriting can last as long or as short as you want it to be. You can write and add to it, take away from it, split it up into sections, make an outline, build on the skeleton of what you think you want to say, and then add the flesh. You dig into it piece by piece, and you get a GIST of the story in place. That can be Phase 1 if you don't count the prewriting as Phase 1. When you've got it written, and I prefer to do it longhand first, you can add it to your Word documents either as an idea and/or as a sort of loose story with a sort of loose timeframe or plot. You put one foot in front of the other until the story is told from front to back.

    Phase 2 can be the meat of the story, the details, the truths, the lies, and the part that proves or disproves whatever it is that you set out to say. You use the skeleton to find the words you want to flesh out the bare bones of the story. You start with Chapter 1 and you build it until you're finished telling that part of the story. Chapter 2 is the next part of the story. This goes on until you've reached the end, but you can take the chapters and move them around later on to fit the way you want them to fit. By breaking them up one chapter at a time, you can easily move them about. They don't always have to be in chronological order as long as your readers don't have issues with going from one part of the story to the next. I've seen books that have three separate main points, and they are told in A, B, C style. Chapter 1 is A, and Chapter 2 is B, and so forth. Then you do it again.

    Phase 3 is the part where you find all the fluff and stuff. You find points, bits, and details, and you put these into the story by telling little stories inside the other stories. You may do it in paragraph form, or you can take an entire chapter to dive deeply into a sublevel character who may interact with the main characters, or maybe they give background. With my latest book, I created several side characters and gave them really interesting features, facts, folly, and fun, just to be able to stretch the book another 30-40 pages really, to give the reader a break from the same old story they were reading, and keep their mind thinking about the overall tale, not just the details about the two or three main characters. I fill my books with historical facts, fun facts, lies, and discoveries, I don't want it to be boring or mundane.

    Phase 4 is the part where you sit back and clean it up. You go through it for comma issues, misspellings, word choices, and overuse of words. Let me tell you, you may be inside Phase 4 for a good while!! You clean it, pick at it, tweak it, and then you mull over it a few times to be sure you got it all. You never get it all. You have someone else read it a few times so they can find your mistakes. You correct your mistakes.  Then you send it off and you know you screwed up and you can't wait until it comes back to you so you can fix what you know you missed. 

    Phase 5 is the last phase. You've sent the book off. The publisher has formatted it, and has sent it back to you. You've gone through it with a fine toothcomb. You make the final changes. You list all the errors, or they may let you go into the original manuscript yourself to correct them, and send it back. Once it's done, and you are really sure it's done, you send it back again....and YOU WAIT. You wait on the cover art, and you kick yourself for all the times you made people read the galleys before they were complete, and before you had gone through them 188 times to be sure you hadn't used the same words a gagillion times; like I did. You panic because you think you misspelled Chapter. You panic because you can't remember if you put quotation marks on the inside or the outside of the punctuation mark. You panic because you just wrote a book and everyone is going to know you wrote it...and you ask yourself if that's really what you wanted to say. Then you decide to write a sequel to be sure you got all of the stories told.

    That is the writing process folks.  I'm in Phase 5. I'm waiting for the interior proof to be done again. Whew....and then when it is done, I can say it's a book, it's done, it's going to be great - - and I can't wait to start the sequel. 

Photo Credit: Praxis.com

ONE MORE TIME....I MEAN IT.

 It's Saturday, so I have a bit more time to blog. I'm about to go back into the throws of reading "Of Kilted Pleasure" one more time. I can honestly say that I've read this book more than 10 times now, and it is the one book I've read more than any other book. I'm going back over it for a really good reason. You'll love this too. 

    Xlibris was kind enough to send me the book in production form and to allow me to make corrections one more time before they finished the book.  Well, when they sent the book to me, I immediately dove into it, but I wasn't looking for misspelled words or misplaced commas (which I found), I was looking for word choices. I decided to use the FIND option and see just how many times I had used the same word(s) and I decided I would either change 1/2 of them to something more colorful, or I would find a way to restate what I had stated.  OMG...by that I mean WHAT THE HELL was I thinking?  I used the word "question" more than 150 times. I had used the word "seemed" as many times as I had the word "question". I had used the word "good" too many times. I think I said "little dog" eight or nine times, but come on, you're going to know the dog is small if I just say it twice! 

    Bottom line, I went through the book AGAIN and rewrote the rewrite. I went through it AGAIN, and changed the word "changed".  I went through it so many times and so many ways, that now I need to go back again to be sure I didn't miss putting an "an" in where an "a" had been before, and so forth. This makes me think that now I need to see how many times I used the words "so forth".  I did take out about 50 "now" and 50 more "he" or "she" to make the flow seem better. Geez, writing can be a pain in the ass. Speaking of body parts, there really aren't many choices to use when you want to replace the word "cock" in a book that takes place in the 18th century. Nope, you can say "dick" because the origin of the word does date back to the start of the 18th century in England! There you go! I was able to use that. I wasn't about to say "penis" or "phallus" in my novel, and "willy" just seemed too funny. Not as funny as "pecker" or "wood".  I did use "knob" once.  But yeah, you get the picture. It's hard to find a good word for "cock".  I almost said it's hard to find a good cock, or is it good to find a hard cock? I'm not really sure. Either way, I made my point.

    I'm going back to reading now. She smiles. I really like this book. The cover art should be out soon. I did have to write to the artist(s) to say that Craig Allan Mackenzie does have hair on his bare chest. 

Something like this, only longer hair and yeah, a kilt.

Photo Credit: Pinterest Adrian Paul