Hal Young's Blog, page 38

Sometimes Even The Youngs Are Speechless

Sometimes even the Youngs are speechless. It’s rare,  I know, but it does happen!

Last night we drove up to our house, hours late, exhausted, but delighted to be home. We had just finished 8563 miles, 20 states, five conventions and more than a month away.

Our grown sons met us in the front yard. We thought they must be mighty excited to see us to come home and stay up til 1 am to greet us!

We stood in the driveway chatting when Caleb said, “Mom, you need to put on your glasses.” I was arguing with him when Hal suddenly said, “Wait a minute. What’s with the columns?” Those weren’t the columns we’d left on the house! Then he noticed the shining paint on the garage, and the boys broke down laughing.

While we were gone, our church, our incredible church family, had completely renovated the exterior of our house!

Our church, Southwest Wake Christian Assembly, is the best church we’ve ever been in for not just talking about being the body of Christ, but living it. We’ve seen church families take in needy strangers, come alongside families with cancer or other health problems, welcome a single mom into their home long term, and reach out to meet one another’s needs again and again. It’s a huge blessing to be a part of.

As we were preparing to leave on this trip, back in May, one of the men of the church offered to take care of our yard while we were gone. After we departed, he came by, noticed some work needed to be done on the house, and the Lord laid it on his heart to make sure it got done.

The remarkable thing, which he didn’t know, is how overwhelmed and discouraged we had been feeling. Our speaking schedule has been more crowded than ever before, we were straining to finish a book project, and keep up with all the other demands of business, ministry, and family. Although our family and ministry were well, our physical home was falling into disrepair, and we were wondering if we were just trying to do more than we were able. Did we need to just lay this ministry down and Hal go back to engineering?

The first Sunday we were gone, Kevin stood before the church and asked for a show of hands — how many had been blessed and influenced by the Youngs? Then he told them what he wanted to do …

Over the next several weeks, our church family replaced all the siding on our house, repaired woodwork, powerwashed and repainted the house, trim and all, cleaned the roof, weeded and replanted all the flowerbeds, put down mulch, and even more.

It was quite a testimony to our neighbors, too. They can’t stop talking about it!

John Calvin, our eldest, said over 100 people came at one time or another to help. And still they managed a complete social media blackout (there were tales of Kevin warning the teenagers in church: “No Instagrams! None!”). As active as we are on Facebook and other channels, and as interconnected as our church is, we did not have the slightest hint all this was going on!

This is what the body of Christ is all about. We each take the talents he’s given us and we bless the body with them.

Our dear, sweet friend Carrie often comes to help with laundry. When Melanie was feeling sheepish over her latest offer to help, Carrie told her, “God hasn’t put me in a position where I can speak and write and help families like He has you. He has, however, given me many teenage daughters, and we can do laundry and free you up to do those other things.”

Angie and Jed said much the same thing.  ”We know what it’s like to need to do something but have no one to care for your pets – we’ve been there,” they said. “Let us keep your dogs.” And they have, all summer long.

Angie and Jed and Carrie and Kevin and our entire church family are part of this ministry. They hold us accountable, they hold up our hands when we’re weak, they share some of our burdens to free us up for the work, they pray for us (and you!), they help us financially.

Every single one of them is part of what we do. The body of Christ working together as some hammer, some paint, some wash clothes, some write checks, some speak, to teach others about “Making Biblical Family Life Practical,” as our motto says.

Thank you, Father, that we don’t have to bear the burdens alone.

 

Thank You, Father, for our brothers and sisters in Christ and for their love for You and for us and for all the people we reach.

Have you ever been utterly surprised by God’s gracious provision for your family?

Yours in the battle,

Hal & Melanie

When Boys Want to Be Scientists…

Most boys at some time or another think they want a career in science or technology. Sometimes that’s what God’s calling them to, but other times, it’s what they think that kind of career would bring. That’s the way we were. Hal majored in engineering and Melanie in the hard sciences, though it’s become clear over the years that our real gifts and calling are in writing and speaking. So, the first thing you need to figure out is why your student is being drawn into the sciences.

Ask a lot of good questions. Why does he want to be a scientist? What does he think a scientist does on a typical day? Often, our students are imagining the adventurous life shown in the movies rather than a professor’s quiet lab work and research. They see themselves as Tony Stark or Bruce Banner. Melanie imagined studying robotics would lead to the exciting kind of life portrayed in science fiction, instead she’s found great adventure being engaged in the war for souls in our family life and ministry. Help your child find their real gifts, science or otherwise.

Create real world exposure. Find someone employed in the sciences, a professor or research chemist perhaps, and suggest your child ask if they can shadow them for a few days. If he’s still interested after that, see if you can arrange for a longer term internship.

And, if he’s still thinking science, what then?

Math. One of the things that derails a lot of science and engineering aspirations is math – namely, calculus. You don’t necessarily have to do calculus in high school, but they need a solid foundation in math, extending at least to precalculus, so that they can move into calculus confidently.

Science. Taking an Advanced Placement (AP) course or dual enrollment course or two in the sciences can help prepare them to jump ahead at the college level – or even just be better prepared. Be aware, though: AP classes, as well as college classes, assume a student has already had a year of the high school level of that science before they start the advanced course. That means that it’s helpful to start high school science a year early if you have a science-oriented student, so that they have time to complete advanced courses without doubling up.

We’re hopeful that the next generation of scientists will have a lot of homeschool graduates. The things we are so good at teaching as homeschoolers – Biblical worldview, diligence, critical thinking, integrity – will be real assets in the scientific community.

Hal & Melanie Young

For more information, see our workshops, “Homeschooling High School & Transcripts” and “Aiming For College.” Link:

This article first appeared in The Homeschool Minute by The Old Schoolhouse Magazine

Rambunctious or Obnoxious?

A reader on Facebook recently asked privately, “My friends and I parent differently. What is the difference between allowing your boys to be rambunctious and boyish and letting them be obnoxious and run wild?”

I think the balance is found in appropriateness. Outside, let them run and play and wrestle and yell. Inside, they moderate it to keep from damaging things and driving you crazy. At other people’s houses, they moderate it still more to comply with their rules and to be good guests. At church, or elderly family member’s house or a wedding or funeral, they learn to be quiet, still and respectful. They can learn the difference, though it’s a challenge when they’re younger.

Much love,

Melanie

Guest Post: Kristyn Getty on Mother’s Day Prayers

I noticed an older journal of mine amongst the debris of an Eliza playtime around my bookshelf and sat down to leaf through it. Before the sickness and tiredness of pregnancy, in the days when I had time in abundance and thought I was ‘busy’,  my most focused and best devotional times were always when I journaled.  To my shame, through pregnancy, and even now I have not managed to be anywhere near as consistent as I’d like to be or need to be. But in this newly discovered old notebook I read through a few prayers I had scribbled pre and post baby and remembered again God’s continuing faithfulness through the transitions of new life, chapters and all the unknown days ahead. It also inspired me to really focus on journaling again! I noted some of the prayers below – they’re nothing grand!- but I hope they might help someone in someway…

December 26th 2010 (10 weeks until baby comes)

‘Lord, help me not be afraid’

 

January 4th 2011

Father in heaven,

What a miracle it is that a little one is hidden inside of me and that You are weaving her together piece by piece, inch by inch; that You know all her days before they come to be, her abilities, her struggles, her humor, her disposition, the color of her eyes, the shape of her feet.  Such knowledge is too marvelous for me. I praise You for she is fearfully and wonderfully made.  Lord please protect her within my womb…’

January 8th 2011 – 8 weeks and 2 days till baby comes

‘Thank you for this little child within my womb – may she very early in life add her praise to the great song of praise and that those looking on might see Your goodness and strength through her young voice.  Help us teach her Lord, inspire her, make known what is right and how holiness is always beautiful…’

The same day -

‘I think today of those ladies I know who long to be mothers remembering my own heartache and how hard it is to wait and not know.  Father, please enable them to conceive and carry babies full term.  Help them to get through each day fulfilling what it is you have called them to for that moment.  May their greatest delight be in You and if children do not come move in their hearts by Your grace that they may not be lost in the distraction or disappointment but know Your healing and purpose for their lives.  You know the pain – draw near to them this day’

 

April 8th 2011 (Eliza is 5 and a 1/2 weeks old)

‘Father in heaven, thank You for this new morning and safety and rest through the night as Your unsleeping eye watched over us.  Thank You that all our nights and all our days are known and measured by You.  Thank You for the joy of family and that You love and care for each member of my family more than I ever could.  And yet the love of a mother is both fierce and gentle, strong and tender – thank You for our beautiful baby.  Forgive my anxious thoughts, worries and any idolatry in my heart.  She is Your child and may I love and serve You well in loving and protecting her to the best of my ability.  May I love and honor You by loving and honoring my husband well.  Thank You for Your care of me in these last weeks’

 

First Mothers Day – May 8th 2011

Today is my first Mother’s Day as a mother – thank you Lord for enabling me to be a mother and for the precious gift of Eliza in our lives.  Help me be a godly and gentle and hardworking and loving and joyful mother to the glory of Christ. May He be first in our hearts as we pray He will be first in Eliza’s heart.

Kristyn Getty

Guest Post: Kristyn Getty on Reflections on a Mother’s Prayer

In the spring of 2008 I first prayed for a baby, and in the spring of 2011 God answered that prayer with the birth of our beautiful daughter.  My joy was full but so were the fears I wrestled.  In some ways I felt like a baby Christian again, caught in a whirlwind of emotions, learning and applying what I have known and trusted into a completely new life – I know I’m definitely not the first to feel that!

Friends of ours had given us a card when their first son was born; it was full of prayer requests for his little life, a prayer for every day of the month. My prayers were not quite as coherent as those, especially at first, but the urgency of the moment drove me to my knees.  “Help her, help me” baby prayers at 3am; prayers as I heard the baby monitor light up in the morning; prayers when I thought of her safety, her soul, her future; prayers  with my husband; prayers while Eliza listened in.

When people found out that I was pregnant one of the most frequent comments I received was how my creativity would discover a whole new vista of inspiration as I became a mother.  So, when Eliza came I was anticipating a fresh flow of profound poetic thought, but instead I was swept up in the constant flow of changes and feedings and “Old MacDonald had a farm!” I was expecting full sentences, but I was blubbering looking at my beautiful girl! I actually wondered if I’d ever be able to write again.  I just about tucked some thoughts away to ponder later when my brain would start to fit itself back together again (still nowhere near a completed process!). As I continued to learn the wonderful balancing act and privilege of mothering, homemaking, writing, traveling and singing, Keith and I began to write a song for Eliza choosing this theme of praying for her, and the end result was “A Mother’s Prayer.”

My parents have faithfully prayed for me my whole life, and I remember when I was younger my mum met with other mums to pray for all their children – a “Moms in Touch” group in Belfast. Even just the knowledge of that helped me, and I want Eliza to know we are praying for her and trying to guide her in this context that reaches to the call and purpose of her whole life and an understanding of the Lord’s grace and faithfulness. We’re now in the toddler stage and some of the prayer needs are shifting.  We wanted the song to reflect the different seasons – ones we had discovered and then those still to come.  We also wrote it to remind us of our promise to pray for her through all the years we’re given.  We hope this song for her – and even more our praying for her – might catch her ear and help guide her heart as she grows up.

Kristyn Getty

A Mother’s Prayer by Kristyn Getty

Keith & Kristyn Getty are some of our favorite modern songwriters. Right up there with our son, Matt Henry Young (BTW, if you haven’t listened to this song of his, you need to!). They write songs of praise that aren’t merely choruses or full of mindless repetition, but instead are full of faith-building truth just like our favorite hymnwriters of the past. So, when the Gettys contacted us to see if we’d like to share Kristyn’s newest song with our readers before Mother’s Day, of course, we said yes!

Once I’d heard it, though, I was especially glad to bring it to you because it shares the heart of every believing mother — that her child would learn to love her Lord. Enjoy!

Want to share this sweet song? Head over to the Getty’s site by clicking here and you can send a Mother’s Day card with this song — and get 15% off of their music, too!

Keep your eyes out tomorrow for a guest post by Kristyn sharing her thoughts about this song!

Melanie Young

Teaching the Manly Virtue of Controlling Your Mouth – and Heart

I just read a news article about a young newscaster on the air for the first – and last – time at his first job out of college. His first words on the air were a blast of profanity. Oh, he didn’t know his microphone was on, but part of a reporter’s training is to always remember any mic nearby could be hot. The real problem, however, is that he has not learned to control his temper and his mouth. He’d been practicing pronouncing the name of the winner of the London Marathon and couldn’t get it right. He just blew up and broadcast filth to the entire audience. The station let him go and I’m sure he’s rethinking his language habits right about now.

This is a great example to teach our sons the dangers of having a bad temper and of letting ourselves use bad language. Why not go a step further, though?

I’ll never forget the mom’s night out meeting when an older mom said, “You know, I’ve had to give up sanitized cursing. You know, those nonsense words that we use when we’re mad instead of cussing.”

Everyone was pretty surprised, “What’s wrong with that?” She explained much to our surprise how many of them are clearly meant to be the same thing as the original word. Gosh seems to be from the word God, Jeeze from the word Jesus, darn it from that phrase that asks God to condemn something to everlasting punishment. That was startling enough for someone who takes very seriously that we shouldn’t take the name of the Lord in vain, but then she said something even more surprising,

“Even if those really were just nonsense words, doesn’t our use of them say something about our hearts?” After all, why do we use exclamations like that? Why are we so angry about the things that happen to us? Shouldn’t we trust God more to have our good at heart? Shouldn’t we be more content? As Paul said:

“Not that I speak in regard to need, for I have learned in whatever state I am, to be content: I know how to be abased, and I know how to abound. Everywhere and in all things I have learned both to be full and to be hungry, both to abound and to suffer need. I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.” Philippians 4:11-13

Wow, that was convicting. Let’s talk to our guys about having a heart of contentment and not one of cursing and railing against the sovereignty of God – and about the manly virtue of self-control. That even when we blow it in our hearts, it doesn’t have to come out of our mouths! Instead, we should pray and ask for help to make our hearts right. It’s not easy, though, we have to work at it:

“But no man can tame the tongue. It is an unruly evil, full of deadly poison. With it we bless our God and Father, and with it we curse men, who have been made in the similitude of God. Out of the same mouth proceed blessing and cursing. My brethren, these things ought not to be so.” James 3:8-10

When we explain to our guys that letting any old thing out of their mouths could cost them the job they need to support their wife and children, they see it’s not just mom and dad being picky, it’s a real issue that affects their future – and says something about their relationship with their God, too.

-Melanie

Many thanks to bromundt of Stock Exchange for the perfect photo! 

Coming in May!

The Young family is on the road again in May!  We’ll be speaking at four major events in North and South Carolina, Tennessee, and Nebraska, and kicking off the first leg of our 2013 Great Western Tour.

May 2-4

Spartanburg, S.C.

Teach Them Diligently

May 16-18

Nashville, Tenn.

Teach Them Diligently

May 23-25

Winston-Salem, N.C.

North Carolinians for Home Education

May 30-June 1

Omaha, Neb.

Teach Them Diligently

Do you live along these routes? Would you like to have Hal and Melanie speak to your church, support group, or just a meeting of friends? Then drop us a line at info@raisingrealmen.com and start the conversation. You may be surprised how easily and inexpensively it can be done!

Opportunities:

Sunday, May 26 – West Virginia – Hal is available to teach a Sunday evening service, or both Hal and Melanie can speak to a group anywhere along the route of Bluefield-Beckley-Charleston-Huntington

Monday-Tuesday, May 27-28 – Missouri/Indiana/Illinois/Iowa – We are planning to stop two nights somewhere in a region bordered by Huntington, W.Va.-St. Louis-Kansas City on the southern edge, and Cincinnati-Indianapolis-Des Moines on the northern edge. If you are in that area and would be interested in hosting us for a meeting around that time, we might be available!

 

The Joy of Big Boys

Training the next brother to work the booth.

We’re getting ready to fly out to California for the CHEA Bay Area Homeschool Convention this weekend. I’m still part time on crutches, but as I was thinking through the trip, I realized I’m not worried. See, we’re taking two of our teens with us and I know they’ll take great care of me. It’s hard to imagine when you’re changing diapers or hauling them out of the toilet and washing them up. It’s even harder to imagine when they’re eleven or twelve and they can’t get their school work done unless you’re constantly on their case. It’s hard to imagine, alright, but the day will come when you depend on them – and it’s a lot closer than you think!

I realized how much I’ve come to depend on our teens when we began talking about the possibility of them working away for the summer. Uh oh! How could we manage without them? How would we handle all the equipment when we camped? It would take so much longer to set up, and then pack out in the morning! Who’s going to run errands – or babysit? And conferences? I don’t even want to think about doing that without those guys!

It’s time, though, for the next two to step up to the plate. It’s time for them to learn the diligence and responsibility that have made their big brothers such a blessing to us. I’m not looking forward to the work that will take, but I’ve seen the blessings and it’s so worth it! Raise your boys to work hard, to contribute to the family – and don’t despair when it seems an impossible dream! They’ll grow up before you know it!

Hal & Melanie

 

 

Convention Season – Should You Go?

When our eldest was just one, we went to our first homeschool convention – in a picnic shelter (really!) in Modesto, California. It was so exciting to talk to homeschoolers and to look through all the books. We knew we wanted to homeschool and this little taste of it just whet our appetites. We’ve only missed going to a homeschool convention once in the twenty-two years since then!

It’s true the Internet has changed things. It’s easier to get information and easier to “talk” to other homeschoolers than ever before. You can even download workshop sessions from your favorite speakers whenever you like.

So why should you go to a live homeschool convention?

It’s different when you are actually there. We love the time after our workshops when we get to talk to moms and dads face to face and pray with them. You can really get to know the speakers you enjoy – and they can get to know you.

Often the people who wrote the curriculum you are interested in are right there in the book fair. Even if they’re not, there will be knowledgeable folks running each booth, usually people who’ve used those books themselves. You can talk to other parents there and gain from their experience, and take a look at new things you’ve never even heard of before.

It’s good to be away from home, too. It’s hard to focus on your own learning when the children are running in and out and the laundry is calling. It’s so relaxing to sit back next to your mate, listen and learn, then head to lunch together talking about where the Lord is leading your family. It’s good for you and good for your marriage and children, as well.

The best reasons, though, are the divine appointments. Cool things happen when you put a few thousand homeschoolers in a building together. It happens all the time. We see two dads bouncing cranky toddlers in the hall and the dad who’s been worried about high school talks about the teens he’s met there. Teens who’d been restless at home gain a new perspective and a bunch of new friends in the teen sessions. A group of moms chatters up a storm waiting for a session to start, then settles back happy with some new ideas. Old friends call delighted greetings over stacks of books. The energy and joy is amazing!

 

We’re going to be speaking at a number of conventions this year, including:

Santa Clara, Calif. – Christian Home Educators Association of California (CHEA-CA), Bay Area Convention
Spartanburg, S.C. – Teach Them Diligently
Nashville, Tenn. - Teach Them Diligently
Winston-Salem, N.C. – North Carolinians for Home Education (NCHE)
Nampa, Id. (Boise area) - Christian Homeschool Organization of Idaho State (CHOIS)
Phoenix, Ariz. – Arizona Families for Home Education (AFHE)
Matthews, N.C. (Charlotte area) – HINTS Book Fair

If you come to one, stop by and say, “Hi!”

For more times and places, visit our Events page at RaisingRealMen.com/calendar

 

This article originally appeared in The Homeschool Minute.