R.B. Holbrook's Blog, page 19

Angel vs. Demon: Under New Management 1

Angel: “RB? You busy?”

Me: “What’s up?”

Angel: “I wanted to talk about your failed goal and your lack of blogging.”

Me: *groan*

Demon: “Yep. You suck.”

Angel: “Please stop rubbing it in, Demon. It doesn’t help.”

Demon: “Duh, I’m not here to help.”

Me: “Okay, Angel, what is it? How can you help me?”

Angel: “Let us take over your blog, that will free one of your obligations.”

Me: “That’s a thought… I might actually like it.”

Demon: “Hell, yeah! We’ll rename it Demon’s Party Session!!”

Me: “But you’ll have to keep Demon in check.”

Angel: *grinning* “Oh. I think I can do that.”

Demon: *shivers* “Is that fear I feel?”

RBH

Filed under: Angel vs. Demon Tagged: 2013, Angel vs. Demon, blogging, new management, R B Holbrook, Writing

Angel vs. Demon: 2013

Angel: “Happy New Year, RB!”

Me: *groan*

Demon: “Somebody didn’t make their goal…I wonder who?”

Me: *groan*

Angel: “At least you haven’t given up. Keep working on it.”

Demon: “Yeah, maybe by 2014 you’ll actually be done with this manuscript.”

Me: “I’ll be done before the winter’s out. It’s just… this book is so different from my last books. I want it to be right.”

Angel: “I understand. But I believe 2013 will be your year.”

Demon: “I believe you’re a loser.”

Me: “Happy New Year to you, too, Angel. Demon, go jump off a skyscraper.”

Demon: “You know I can’t die right?”

Angel: “Oh…you can…you certainly can.”

Demon falls silent.

Me: “You shut him up? Hoho, I like 2013 already.”

RBH

Filed under: Angel vs. Demon Tagged: 2012, 2013, Books, goal, new year, R B Holbrook, resolutions, Writing

Angel vs. Demon: Countdown

Angel: “Well, the world hasn’t ended yet.” *giggle*

Demon: *snicker* “Human’s are so gullible, they believe anything.”

Angel: “Sad, but… Where’s RB?”

Demon: “Writing. Being boring. Writing some more.”

Angel: “But what about the New Years Countdown?”

Demon: “I was told that we’re on our own. Dammit, I’m almost out of beer!”

Angel: “Nasty stuff. You don’t need it.”

Demon: “No, what I don’t need is to be here bored along with you wimps. I’m going to party with the rest of the sinners. Later!”

Angel: “Hmmm… No RB. No Demon. Ooo, I don’t have to share the ice cream, the popcorn, or the remote? And I can stretch out on the couch?! Whoa… BEST NEW YEAR’S EVE EVER!”

RBH

Filed under: Angel vs. Demon Tagged: 2012, 2013, Angel vs. Demon, Countdown, New Year's Eve, R B Holbrook, Writing

Angel vs. Demon: Merry Christmas!

Angel: “Merry Christmas, RB!”

Me: “Merry Christmas, Angel!”

Angel: “Merry Christmas, Demon!”

Demon: “Oh stuff it! Bah humbug!”

Angel: “You can’t ruin my spirits. It is a glorious day! I even brought you two presents. For you RB, a blessing of health and God’s favor.”

Me: “Thank you!”

Angel: “And for you Demon-”

Demon: “If you bless me with anything, I’ll cram it so far down your yap, you’ll fart prayers ’til kingdom come.”

Angel: “Coal. Just for you. I think it goes well with your pit of eternal flame.”

Demon’s jaw drops.

Me: “Whoa! I think she just rubbed something in… but I can’t put my finger on it…”

Angel: “MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE!!!!”

RBH

Filed under: Writing Tagged: Angel vs. Demon, blessings, coal, Happy Holidays, Merry Christmas, pit of eternal flame

Angel vs. Demon: Roughest Draft

Demon: “Why the hell are you ignoring me? I won’t have it!”

Me: “I have work to do, I can’t spend all my time with you and Angel.”

Demon: “But we’re you’re muses. You need us! You need ME!”

Me: “Shut it. I promised myself I’d finish two books before the end of the year…buuuut that’s not going to happen. I at least want to finish this one. I just need to spend more time concentrating on this book. That means ignoring you for a while.”

Angel: “Why are you stressing? You’ve been done for some time now.”

Me: “Not really. Yes, I’m finished with the first draft, but it is incredible…extremely rough. There is still a lot of work to do. I have the second draft, the rewrites, and proofreading. The-”

Demon: “More work?! Just send it to an editor as is and be done with it. Now pay me some attention!“

Me: “But it’s just the rough draft… that’s sending an outline to be published to the world. No way!”

Angel: “I get it, the story has to be polished. If you send a story with just a first draft it’s like giving someone a cake that hasn’t been cooked yet.”

Demon: “Oooo, I like cake batter!”

Me: “The story isn’t ready until all the loose ends are tied or at least until it makes a complete picture of satisfaction to the reader.”

Demon: “I like this analogy better: It’s like picking a scab before it completely heals.”

Angel: “Eeeeewwww, yuck!“

Me: “I think he gets the point.”

Angel: “Well take the time you need. We’ll be here should you need advice.”

Demon: “Don’t take too long, my input’s too important to put on hold dammit!“

Me: “…thanks for your support…”

Demon: “Anytime.”

RBH

Filed under: Angel vs. Demon, Writing Tagged: Angel vs. Demon, first draft, proofreading, rewrites, rough draft, Writing

Angel vs. Demon: Turkey

Demon: “Ooooooohh, I’m stuffed.”

Angel: “No one told you to be gluttonous.”

Demon: “And no one told you to be a buzz kill.”

Angel: *sigh* “RB, are you going back to writing?”

Me: “Yeah.”

Demon: “Even after eating all that turkey? It’s a holiday, take a break.”

Me: “Took too many of those already. Got stuff in my head that needs to come out… must finish…”

Demon: “No fun. Are we at least going shopping tomorrow? I want to harass some shoppers.”

Me: “Take Angel.”

Demon: “No! Hell no! Forget it, I’m out of here.”

Angel: “Happy Thanksgiving, Demon!”

Demon: “You suck!”

RBH

Filed under: Angel vs. Demon Tagged: Angel vs. Demon, R B Holbrook, shopping, Thanksgiving, turkey, Writing

Angel vs. Demon: Righteous Punishment

Angel: “Trying to find the best way to punish a criminal?”

Me: “Yeah. Problem is there’s so many possibilities to chose from.”

Angel: “What are his crimes?”

Demon: “Does it matter? Punishment is in order! I’m great at issuing punishment! Come on ask me, ask me!“

Me: “Why bother? Just volunteer it like you usually-”

Demon: “You could push him off the edge of a cliff!”

Me: “No.”

Angel: “What about sending him to jail?”

Demon: “Hell no, that’s too anti-climatic.”

Me: “Wait… that…”

Demon: “No! You can’t be considering that? Too boring!”

Angel: “I think it’s a noble idea for a criminal.”

Demon: “Noble? Such bullsh-”

Me: “Think about it, Demon, if I send him to jail, that allows him to go and do more damage later if I want.”

Demon: “More damage? Send him to jail!”

RBH

Filed under: Angel vs. Demon, Writing Tagged: Angel vs. Demon, anti-climatic, crime, criminal, jail, punishment, R B Holbrook, Writing

Angel vs. Demon: Love Scene Part 3

Me: “I think I wrote a pretty believable scene.”

Angel: “Aaaaah, young love…”

Demon: “Easily squashed by a giant’s foot right in the middle of the mushy scene… Oh wait, wrong type of book. No giants. Oooooo, what about dragons? You have plenty of those!”

Me: “Now that’s an idea!”

Angel: “And ruin all your hard work? This is SUPPOSED to be a love scene.”

Demon: “RB doesn’t need it. Ass-kicking is fun + awesomeness.”

Me: “True. True.”

Demon: “Just one dragon.”

Me: “Just one?”

Demon: “a small one.”

Me: “A small one?”

Demon: “tiny”

Me: “I can do tiny.”

Angel: “RBH, LEAVE THE NICE COUPLE ALONE!!”

Me: “Okay, fine.”

Demon: “Damn!”

RBH

Filed under: Angel vs. Demon, Writing Tagged: angel, Angel vs. Demon, conscience, demon, dragons, giants, inner struggle, inner voice, love scene, mushy, R B Holbrook, romance, Writing

Angel vs. Demon: Love Scene Part 2

Angel: “You didn’t have this hard a time writing a love scene for Oracle’s Legacy.”

Me: “It was a different couple. With different circumstances. Those were adults who were almost pretty secure in who they were. These are teenagers still finding their place in the world. Big difference.”

Demon: “Just give them both a knife and let them duel it out. That will get rid of the teen angst.”

Me: “Don’t tempt me.”

Angel: “No!”

Me: “It was just a joke, calm down.”

Demon: “I wasn’t joking. Anyway, have you found your believable ideal yet.”

Me: “Well… maybe… This isn’t a romance novel so I wanted a slow steady building romance… Budding romance. And this is the initial discovery scene. This is what I have so far.” Shows them the screen.

Angel: “Good, but how about if you do this.”

Me: “Okay.”

Angel: “And maybe add a little nervousness. They are young, easily confused, and inexperienced.”

Me: “I see.”

Demon: “Throw some sex in there. Sex sells.”

Angel: “Oh! NO!”

Me: “Not that kind of book. Sorry.”

Demon: “Hell, well let me know when you get to that kind of book. Otherwise, I’ll be in the corner pulling out my horns in despair. Just ignore the screaming.”

RBH

Filed under: Angel vs. Demon, Writing Tagged: Angel vs. Demon, love scene, R B Holbrook, romance, teen angst, Writing

Angel vs. Demon: Love Scene Part 1

Demon: “Oh…Angel, how I have missed you. Please never leave me again.”

Angel: “No, never! I’ll never leave you again. I can’t bear it!”

Demon: “Does that mean…?”

Angel: “Yes, oh, yes! How I love-”

Me: “Okay, I can’t take much more of this. You two are really bad actors.”

Demon: “Told ya I don’t do love scenes.”

Angel: “I thought it was pretty good considering.”

Me: “Angel, you were TOO into it. And Demon looked like he was about to choke.”

Demon: “No, there was no about to, that was actually me choking. As for Angel, she likes anything with the word love in it.”

Angel: “It is a powerful emotion. Anyone who experiences love-”

Demon: “Shut up. Listen, RB, I don’t get the point of this. Just turn on the television and find a romantic movie if you want to create a believable love scene.”

Me: “Those aren’t believable. Romance isn’t that mushy and showy.”

Demon: “Romance is a pretense. It’s an act to get what you want in the end. It doesn’t matter if its believable. Nine times out of ten, people like the idea of romance, not the real thing. And in real life, who actually has time to sweep someone off their feet or present them with flowery words?”

Angel: “People who truly love one another! You don’t understand the power of love-”

Demon: “Shut up. Regardless, just write something down as you would see it in a novel or a movie. You don’t really need to see the real thing, it’s messing, confusing, and usually leads to divorce. Plus, people don’t want believable, they want fiction, that’s why they pick up books in the FICTION section or turn to reality television.”

Angel: “Wait. Reality television isn’t real?”

Demon: “My naive little angel, tsk tsk. Anyway, just put something on paper and move on to the violence.”

Angel: “Love demands more than just a short-”

Demon: “Shut-”

Angel: “Tell me to shut up one more time and I’ll kiss you right on the lips.”

Demon: *gasp*

Me: “Hehe, now THAT I can use.”

RBH

Filed under: Writing Tagged: Angel vs. Demon, love scene, R B Holbrook, romance, Writing