R.B. Holbrook's Blog, page 17
March 20, 2013
Steer Clear of Procrasti Nation
Rb: “While Angel and Demon are writing their story and adding finishing touches I want to issue a public service announcement: BEWARE OF PROCRASTINATION!”
PN: “Dude, its twooooo words, first name Procrasti, last name Nation.”
Rb: “Who names their child Procrasti? Especially with a last name like Nation.”
PN: “Seriously, dude, really? You seriously, like really, kind of need to back off about my name. K?”
Rb: “Right. As I was saying: Procrastination is a worthy foe. If you lose focus procrastination will keep you from reaching your writing goal or any kind of goal.”
PN: “Really? It’s not that serious. Everyone just needs to chiiilllll. Relax, it’s alright to enjoy and have fun. Why rush? Life’s not going anywhere. Like, people are just letting the man really put stuff in their head, making them believe…stuff. You know?”
Rb: “…… But some people have dreams they want to accomplish and goals that will open doors for them. If they procrastinate, some opportunities will be missed. Don’t you have dreams you want to focus on and achieve?”
PN: “Naaah…Well… There’s like this one dream where I get laid by–”
Rb: “Not that kind of dream! I’m talking about a goal you want to reach.”
PN: “Goal? Duuuude, I got this really awesome goal to get high like every day. But since money’s low I only smoke like–”
Rb: “AGAIN I REPEAT: BEWARE OF PROCRASTINATION!!”
PN: “Seriously dude, you’re saying it wrong. I’m starting to think, like you’re doing it on purpose.”
RbH
Procrastination is opportunity’s assassin.
–Victor Kiam
Filed under: Angel vs. Demon Blog Tagged: dreams, goals, procrastination, R B Holbrook, writing
March 15, 2013
The Devil’s in the Details 4 [End]
Angel: “We have the setting of the story, characters, and most of the important details. One thing’s missing.”
Demon: “Hell! There’s more?! I can’t take all this crap! Why do stories need all this shit?!?!” He screams.
Angel: Taking her hands off her ears, “……are you finished now?”
Demon: “I think so. Continue.”
Angel: “The last important detail is the tea maker.”
Demon: “Hell who cares…besides you.”
Angel: “This is a crucial detail. Our whole story centers around the tea, why not have the maker?”
Demon: “Why? Because I DON’T CARE.”
Angel: “Really?”
Demon: “Don’t. Care.”
Angel: “Very well, I’ll make her a wise benevolent woman who loves just deeds and–”
Demon: “Hold the damn phone. That plays right into your hands! You sneaky bitch. Your character would win the race!”
Angel: “But you said you didn’t–”
Demon: “Too damn bad for you I changed my mind. Move over, we’re compromising on this character.”
Angel: “So sensible of you.”
Demon: “Shut the hell up and start writing.”
RbH
Filed under: Angel vs. Demon Blog Tagged: Angel vs. Demon, creative writing, details, healer, R B Holbrook, tea maker
March 14, 2013
The Devil’s in the Detail 3
Demon: “Okay… In this story we’re writing, I get that we’re supposed to find the healing tea of Mysteria but what exactly does it do?”
Angel: “Heals.”
Demon: “Yeah, smartass, I got that much. But what does it heal? What ailment? It can’t just heal everything.”
Angel: “Why not?”
Demon: “It’s too broad. Too general. Too many people would be after it.”
Angel: “Good, then we’ll have plenty of conflict to choose from. But the better question is who makes it? And why is there a race to get to it if its made?”
Demon: “…yeah … Couldn’t the maker just make more for everyone?”
Angel: “Exactly! There has to be a reason for this race. Like the tea takes several years to brew.”
Demon: “Damn that’s some strong tea. Like Vodka! Pour me some!”
Angel: “Or the ingredients to make the tea are extremely rare.”
Demon: “Ooo, what about if the only person who makes it is about to die with no heir and refuses to pass on the secret!”
Angel: “Morbid…but it could work…”
Demon: “Hells yeah, ’cause I thought of it.”
RbH
Filed under: Angel vs. Demon Blog Tagged: creative writing, healing, R B Holbrook, story, tea
March 13, 2013
The Devil’s in the Details 2
Demon: “So we got the scenery for the regions and the different sapient races…You know we may not need all this shit since this is just a short story.”
Angel: “Maybe, but at least we have the foundation for our world. The mountainous region with thickets of trees, snow caps, jolly elves, and thieving trolls is where my character resides.”
Demon: “I can’t believe you named it Jolli Frosti Peaks. That’s just bullshit.”
Angel: *sigh* “I need something happy and positive. The premiss of the whole story is dark and gloomy. I mean your kingdom is ruled by a vicious tyrant who enslaved his poor faeries and is making them build a giant monument to… I can’t even say it.”
Demon: “I’ll say it! They’re making a shrine to me! MUWAHAHA-”
Angel: “Sickening and wicked. And you have no green shrubs, no flowers, not even a blade of grass. The only bright spot is the river I suggested otherwise your poor faeries would thirst to death… I’ve never heard of faeries living in a wasteland. It’s absurd.”
Demon: “Delicious. That’s what it is. Beautifully delicious with a side of yummy.”
Angel: “……..”
Demon: “What?”
RbH
Filed under: Angel vs. Demon Blog Tagged: Angel vs. Demon, creative writing, description, R B Holbrook, scenery, setting, story details, wicked
March 12, 2013
The Devil’s In The Details 1
Angel: “So we need to agree on a few of the story details so that both of our parts have some consistency.”
Demon: “Let’s agree to whatever I decree.”
Angel: “NO. First detail: is what kind of world is Mysteria?”
Demon: “Hell, you made a list?!“
Angel: “I did. Now pay attention. Mysteria is a fantasy world with-”
Demon: “Bone crunching ogres and trolls that will rob you blind. Oh and don’t forget the religious freak faeries.”
Angel: “I was thinking topography.”
Demon: “Boring shit. Perfect for you! You work on the flowers and rainbows. I’ll influence the populace.”
Angel: “No way or everyone will be killing each other, eating each other, or raping each other.”
Demon: “Your point?”
Angel: “WE’RE DOING THIS TOGETHER!”
Demon: “Fine, fine. Damn, don’t get your panties in a vise.”
RbH
Filed under: Angel vs. Demon Blog Tagged: creative writing, details, imagination, R B Holbrook, story
March 5, 2013
Out of touch….
Angel: “RB-”
Demon: “Where the hell have you been?”
Rb: “Well you see-”
Demon: “We’ve been working our asses off on this story and you’re nowhere to be found?!? FIVE DAYS!! You disappear for five days and don’t tell anyone. No phone! No text message! What the fu-”
Rb: “I would have told you but where I was had no internet or domestic calling and-”
Angel: “No domestic calling?”
Demon: “Dammit, you went on a trip without me! You left me in this country with her!!”
Rb: “I never said I left the country.”
Angel: “You did. Indirectly. Did you at least have fun?”
Rb: “A blast! Sorry I didn’t take you with me, Angel. But if I took you then I would have to take…”
Angel: “I understand.”
Demon: “Damn you both!“
RbH
Filed under: Writing
February 28, 2013
Demon’s Dilemma 3 [Final]
Angel: “So why is the king killing everyone?”
Demon: “Why? Does there need to be a reason? He’s the king, he can do what he damn well pleases.”
Angel: “I…suppose. But when you write your story, you should always have a reason for each sentence and each paragraph. Just like you told me to get into my character, you have to get into your story. Readers want to understand and sympathize with the characters. You have to be there in that world and know what you are writing to do that.”
Demon: “Be in the world…?”
Angel: “Yes. Know your characters, your setting, your scenes, and describe in a way that makes you the authority of this story.”
Demon: “Yes…the authority. YES! I see what you mean. I understand what RB has been saying all the time. I am this world’s god.”
Angel: “Wait. No-”
Demon: “He may be king, but I am his god and he does what I will. Sacrificing blood in my honor. To the great Demonis. WUUHAHAHAHAHA!!!”
Angel: “Um. What? I think you might-”
Demon: “Yes, that’s the king’s motivation. He wants to please his god. He wants everyone to know the sheer power of my indomitable will. And by pleasing me, I bestow great power and honor on him… I think giving him all the virgin faeries is a suitable gift.”
Angel: “I protest! Absolutely not!”
Demon: “Aaaahhhh, religious zealots really are the best.”
Angel: “This is outrageous!”
Demon: “That’s it! I’ve found my motivation. This faery kingdom will bow to me or feel my wrath. And the instrument for my doctrine will be king… king… king…?”
Angel: “You came up with a name for yourself in this story before you came up with a name for your main character?!?”
Demon: “Maybe.”
Angel: “Ugh!“
RbH
Filed under: Angel vs. Demon, Writing
February 27, 2013
Demon’s Dilemma 2
Angel: “Demon, before I help you write, do you remember what RB always says.”
Demon: “Something about imagination…creativity…”
Angel: “You have to have imagination, Demon. It fuels the creative process. And this,” Holding up Demon’s paper. “Is not creative. So let’s start at the beginning. Once upon a time isn’t going to work.”
Demon: “You’re getting your rocks off rubbing in my failure aren’t you?”
Angel: “Why of course not?! But I am enjoying it.”
Demon: “Same damn difference. Shit stop grinning and just tell me what to do.”
Angel: “Well, first, the beginning has to grab the reader. In this case, we have to please RB, who is our main audience. And she likes immediate action and suspense, an opening line that grabs immediately. If you give too much description, too much fluff, you’ve lost the main audience.”
Demon: “I can do immediate action. And since my main character is a king and a tyrant, I can definitely start with killing! Off with their heads! MUWAHAHAHAHA!”
Angel: “Another thing, don’t fill your story with cliches. That smacks of mundane with no creativity.”
Demon: “So… no off with their head?”
Angel: “No. No, off with their head.”
Demon: “Then how about… SLICE OPEN THEIR NECKS YOU SONS OF BITCHES!!!”
Angel: “Oh, dear,” *sigh*
RbH
Filed under: Angel vs. Demon, Writing
February 26, 2013
Demon’s Dilemma 1
Demon: “ARGH!”
Angel: Jumping in surprise “What!?! What’s wrong? What’s going on?”
Demon: “I don’t see how people write a story. Writing something good is harder than I thought.”
Angel: “Oh? So you have more respect for RB now?”
Demon: “Hell no…but I might understand…a little.”
Angel: “Riiiight. Let me see what you’ve got, maybe I can help.”
Demon: “No. You’ll laugh.”
Angel: “Come on. I want to help. My success also depends on you. RB wanted us to write this together. So…?”
Demon: “Fine.” Hands over his paper.
Angel: Reading, “Once upon a time…” She looks up at Demon, then back down at the paper, “It was a dark and stormy night………………….”
Demon: “Well?”
Angel: “Bwahahahahahahaha!!“
Demon: “You said you wouldn’t laugh!”
Angel: “Hahaha, No, hahaha, no, I never, haha, never promised such a thing. HAHAHAHA!!“
Demon: “Dammit! Let me see what you wrote since you think you’re soooo great.” Snatches Angel’s paper and begins to read. “The tears were there, edged at the cliff of her lashes as he killed the target with his bare hands. She didn’t say a word while the target’s pulse faded against his fingertips. Not a single word or whimper escaped her lips when she backed away, out the room, leaving silence and sorrow in his soul. That was the last time he saw her… the last time he ever took a life.” Demon looks up from the paper. “How…the hell…?”
Angel: “I pay attention while RB writes. And I read books. Shall I help you?”
Demon: “…shit.”
Angel: “I’ll take that as a yes.”
RbH
Filed under: Angel vs. Demon, Writing Tagged: Angel vs. Demon, dilemma, plot, R B Holbrook, reading, story, Writing
February 20, 2013
Angel’s Assassin 3 [Final]
Angel: Grabbing a pen and paper “Ok, I’m ready. Tell me how mortals become addicted to alcohol so I can make my character believable.”
Demon: “It’s not just alcohol, but really anything can be an addiction with the right conditions. First, that mortal needs a vacancy. An emotion void within themselves that needs to be filled. Emotional pain works wonders.”
Angel: Says while writing, “Emotional pain…? Like the loss of a loved one or the lack of self-confidence?”
Demon: “Yep, that’s where I come in and use the art of seduction to make something like a bottle of Vodka look like the perfect filler for that vacancy.”
Angel: “Seduction?”
Demon: “Oooh yeah. At first, I say it will numb the pain or take your mind off your troubles, blah blah blah. Then the second time I may mention it’s because you need to relax or feel good or whatever sounds sexy.”
Angel: “Ha!“
Demon: “Dammit, I can do sexy!”
Angel: “HAHAHAHAHA!”
Demon: “Shit. I quit.”
Angel: “No, *heehee* no. Forgive me… Continue.”
Demon: “Hmph, I can do sexy…”
Angel: “Don’t sulk, Demon…it’s not very…” *smirk*
Demon: “It’s not what?”
Angel: “Let’s continue.”
Demon: “…sometimes mortals don’t need my subtle suggestion, they have other influences. Either way, the excuses continue until the alcohol or whatever becomes habit, a psychological crutch, an escape from reality or responsibility, and a means to a mortal’s inevitable downfall. Beautiful really. Poetic even.”
Angel: “That’s monstrous. I can’t believe you delight in it!”
Demon: “Hell, you came to me and now you’re being a damn-”
Angel: “You’re right, you’re right. Forgive me. So my character was filling an emotional void…but now he’s trying to sober up and remain sober.”
Demon: “That sucks. What’s the point? There’s no fun in it.”
Angel: “Yes… I see my character now. It would have to be something powerful to make this ex-assassin turn his or her life around. Something powerful like love!“
Demon: “Aww hell, I feel sorry for your character.”
RbH
Filed under: Angel vs. Demon, Writing Tagged: addiction, Angel vs. Demon, assassin, mortal, seduction
