Thom S. Rainer's Blog, page 41

Leading Wounded: Dealing with Church Hurt, Disappointment, and Despair as a Leader

I’m sure you’ve heard it said, “Ministry would be great if it weren’t for the people.”
It is a pithy statement loaded with stories of wounds, conflict, and misunderstandings to try to rationalize the reality of church hurt.

Church hurt happens all across the board between staff, pastors and members, and within small groups. As you read this you probably have a handful of faces that are coming to mind where something was said, a decision was made, or the neglect or lack of response to a situation resulted in a broken relationship, awkward stare, or maybe even the decision to leave a church all together.

With statistics growing larger for those who are leaving the Church and leaders who are quitting the ministry due to burn out and exhaustion we have to ask the questions: “How do we deal with church hurt?” and “In what ways can we make sure that we as leaders are processing our own hurt?”

A 3-point blog is in no way going to heal the losses and pains that you have endured, but I hope that in acknowledging and recognizing what so many leaders are carrying right now, we can begin to take steps toward health and healing. 

Grieve What Is Broken

Pete Scazzero says that “Good leaders are good grievers.” This concept was revolutionary to me as a leader several years ago. I often approached my disappointment in church like I did in my softball days where I would get hit by a ball, and though painful and sudden, I would walk it off and keep pressing on for the sake of the game. I was doing the same in my ministry. I would avoid, act like the words or situation wouldn’t phase me, and keep doing the next thing. What I didn’t realize was how much hurt, pain, and rejection I was carrying around in ministry and perspective toward God and His church. The staff departures, the gossip and betrayal, the isolation and the crushing feeling of members leaving the church were all wounds that I had endured but not grieved. 

I love the example David gives us in the Psalms of wrestling out all of the injustices, hurt, and emotion that come with leading. As leaders we often have a tendency to brush it off and rationalize it as “part of the job” but if we don’t humbly and transparently take all our disappointments, failures, and injustices to the God who sees, knows, and cares, we run the risk of leading out of our hurt.

Pray and Reflect

One of my consistent prayers as a leader is, “God keep my heart tender and my skin thick.” The hard parts of ministry and life usually are used by God to unearth the false identities and comforts that I tend to cling to other than God himself. The temptation for a wounded leader is to puff up in self reliance and protection, but it is through the work of the Spirit that we are shown where our blind spots are revealed, compassion is birthed, and dependence is deepened.

Psalm 23 is a picture of God as our Great Shepherd who leads us, cares for us, and restores our soul. If we aren’t willing to trust God for His work in our own lives we can not lead people to Him in their times of struggle and brokenness. The same God you teach and preach about who restores is the same God who desires the same for you. Not so that you can lead better or wiser, but because you are His child and He wants you to know and experience Him.

Fight for The Bride

Jackie Hill Perry once said, “What healed my church hurt, was the Church.” 

When I am facing hard seasons I think of these words often. I believe in the Church because it is God’s mission to be a light in the midst of darkness and hope in the midst of despair. I believe in the Church not because of what I think I can accomplish or how I can fix her, but because it has been God’s plan from the very beginning of time to image His love, justice, and redemption to all people. The privilege of watching Him work, move, and redeem what is broken in me and in those I lead and minister to is the primary motivation of my ministry. With this truth we have to choose to fight for the Church – for her purity, her righteousness, her love, and for a focused mission.

My heart breaks and goes out to so many leaders in this season. I have heard story after story of leaders feeling disposable, division ripping apart faith families, and the deep despair of depression and hopelessness. So many of us are leading from empty souls wondering if we will make it through this season, and my hope and encouragement for all of us is that we recognize our deep need for our Father in these moments. 

I’m praying for all of you wounded leaders right now. Though like Jacob you may walk with a limp, you are a physical reminder to those around you of seeing God face-to-face. I’m praying for you to sit and wrestle out your grief, that you drink deeply of His goodness and righteousness, and that you are able to stand firmly in grace.

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Increase Your Ability to Listen with These Three Easy Questions

If you’re not listening well, then you’re not leading well. In the church, listening is essential because of spiritual growth. How can you guide someone to being more like Christ if you don’t listen carefully to what they say?

I know I can be guilty of thinking of my next sentence as someone speaks. Just because you’re not cutting people off while they speak doesn’t mean you are listening.

Even when you are listening actively, with the best intentions, you can still miss important cues and information. Not only should you carefully listen to what is said, but you should also listen for what is not said. Sometimes what church members don’t say is as crucial as what they say. Three questions can help you discern if anything significant is not being said.

1. What is avoided? Let’s assume you’re discussing a sensitive issue with two people, one in which an obvious offense exists, but neither of them mentions it. Instead, they talk around the issue. The fact they are avoiding the issue and not discussing it is more telling than the ancillary items they bring up. Also, you should take notice when people hesitate. You might ask someone what you believe to be a benign question, but then the person hesitates in responding. Hesitations should cause you to think there might be something deeper there.

2. What is unknown? Pastors are often the first to know about an occurrence in the church or the last to know. The tone of a group in the church will change, and you won’t know why. They will be unusually sad, unusually happy, or just different. Often, there is something unknown to you. Simply asking what’s occurring will many times lead to an answer.

3. What is hidden? Yes, people hide things, even your closest confidants. When church members confess sin, they rarely confess everything at once. Rarely do conspiracy theories pan out to be accurate, but sometimes people do have hidden agendas. You should remain alert to the assumptions of others.

You should not attempt to “read between the lines” in every conversation. Only paranoid pastors think there’s a hidden agenda in everything. But careful and shrewd leaders grow to appreciate and learn what they don’t know. To gain this understanding, you must learn to listen to what is not being said.

 

Want to learn more about this subject? Check out these resources: “ Listening When You Can’t Possibly Hear Everyone ” by Sam Rainer, Church Answers Silver

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Church Leaders’ Frustration with Sunday Sports: Five Considerations

“If our members did not let their kids play on travel leagues or Sunday sports, our attendance would increase by 25 percent.” 

A pastor in Texas said that to me just one week ago. I’ve heard that sentence or similar sentences countless times. Sunday used to be the day for church and only a few other businesses. Now Sunday is a day for almost anything and everything. And church leaders are often frustrated that some of their most committed members are among those whose children are in Sunday sports. 

Let’s look at the issue as objectively as possible. I get the angst. When I served as a pastor many years ago, we would lose one-fourth of our attendance when members and their extended families went on a weekend camping excursion twice a year. I immaturely dreaded preaching to the more vacuous room on those frustrating days.

Here are five considerations. I would love to hear your perspectives as well.

1. Many members are less committed to the church today. From the second chapter of Acts to the third chapter of Revelation, that entire part of the New Testament is either to the local church, about the local church, or written in the context of the local church. The local church is God’s plan A for His mission on earth until Jesus returns, and He did not give us a plan B. Sadly, many church members view the gathered church as just another activity from which to choose. Sometimes sports win. Sometimes sleeping in wins. And sometimes, taking a day off wins. By the way, what do you call a church member who attends only once a month? An elder (or deacon). Yes, that was my weak attempt at humor.

2. Churches expect less today than they did a few decades ago. It’s not just that members are less committed; churches have lowered the bar of biblical expectations of what it means to be a part of the body of Christ. It’s analogous to a wedding ceremony where the groom tells the bride that he loves her, but that he does not plan to spend much time with her. We have dumbed down church membership in many of our churches. We don’t even expect our members to spend time with the bride of Christ.

3. Cultural norms have changed. Have you ever heard of “blue laws”? Those were real laws of cities, counties, and states that restricted most businesses from opening on Sundays. I grew up with those laws. You either went to church or hid in your home so no one would know you weren’t in church. The culture was largely pro-church and pro-Christian then. Yes, the times have changed. But we can’t blame culture for our low-commitment churches. The problem is best seen in the mirror.

4. Churches have adapted to cultural changes in the past. It is likely that Sunday morning worship times, particularly the sacrosanct (at least for a season) 11 am service, was an accommodation to an agricultural society. Get the farm chores done, then go to church. Do we leaders in churches need to reconsider our times and days? Is there anything heretical about offering a Thursday night service in addition to the Sunday morning service? Are we being too rigid with our own schedules? Should we consider accommodating the Sunday sports schedules at least part way?

5. The frustration has been exacerbated by COVID. Since the quarantine and re-opening of churches, attendance has fallen by a median of 20 percent. It feels like we lost one of five members and attendees overnight. In reality, we did lose them! Now, when those three kids are playing soccer, softball, and flag football on Sunday morning, we really get frustrated. There are even fewer people gathered for worship than before. 

I doubt we will solve this challenge with this short article. But I would really like to hear from you. Does your church have the Sunday sports challenge? Are you trying to address it positively? If so, what are you doing?

Let me hear from you.

 

Want to learn more about this subject? Check out these resources: The Complete Membership Class Toolkit , I Am a Christian , “The Once-a-Month Churchgoers Are Becoming More Common” by Thom S. Rainer.

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The Art (and Science) of the First-Time Guest Follow-Up Phone Call

In previous posts, I talked about the importance of following up with first-time guests (FTGs), and seven ways to structure your follow up process. Today: the phone call. If you’ve determined you should make one, what’s the best way to do so? I have five tried-and-true methods that have served me well over the years:

1. Redeem your otherwise-wasted time.

“I just don’t have any more margin to add something to my calendar!” Yes you do. It’s your daily commute, and you can trade off the time you’d listen to podcasts by investing in your guests. The Monday and Tuesday afternoon commutes are usually my go-to times for guest follow up. Typically, I’m catching guests at times they’re also in the car, so it’s a win-win for both of us.

2. Use the etiquette your mama gave you.

Identify who you are and what you do early in the phone call. “My name is ___ and I’m one of the staff members at ___ Church” will build an immediate bridge with someone who just visited your church. (It also sets you apart from telemarketers.)

Ask if this is a convenient time to talk. Sometimes the background noise or stress in their voice will answer that question. If it’s not a good time, ask when would be, and then make sure you call back as promised.

Focus the conversation on them and not you. ‘Nuff said.

3. Keep it short.

My goal is two minutes for the phone call, unless the guest is carrying the conversation and wants to talk longer. I have four things I want to cover:

A personal thanks for their visit. That “thank you” goes a long way.“How was your experience?” This question opens lots of doors to the good and bad of their visit.A chance for them to ask questions. 98% of the time, our guests don’t have any, but this gives them the opportunity.An invitation to a next step. For us, this is our newcomers class called Starting Point. For you, it may simply be a return visit next weekend.

4. Voicemail is your friend.

In the last post I shared that on the first day of follow up calls, I will typically have 80% of my calls go to voicemail. However, if I leave a message and promise to follow up the next day at the same time, I will then get an 80% answer rate. So leave that voicemail…and follow up.

5. Make notes.

I’ll toggle back and forth between phone calls and my voice memo app in order to make sure I’m keeping good information. “Bob was invited by his co-worker Jerry. He’s lived here for a month and is actively looking for a church. His wife and kids are moving here in a few weeks.” That info will go into that person’s profile on our database, so that any other pastor can get up to speed when necessary.

I don’t like to admit this, but as one who doesn’t love talking on the phone, I’ve often said that the five minutes before making follow-up calls are the five most dreaded minutes of my week. But five minutes after the call, I’m always reminded that there’s no better investment of my time.

___________________

This post originally appeared on dfranks.com .

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Pastors with Initiative Build Healthier Church Relationships

Leadership requires initiative. Healthy relationships require initiative. You’re the leader as the pastor. You must take the initiative, especially with relationships in the church. Many pastors rigorously protect their study time in God’s Word. The same intensity should apply to personal relationships.

Will you intimately know every person in your congregation? Of course not. Neither will you know every nuance of every passage in Scripture. But you still make the time to study a specific passage for your sermon preparation. The same initiative that applies to the study of Scripture also applies to relationships in the church. Pastors who take the initiative build more relational bridges in the congregation.

Don’t wait for others to invite you to a meal. You should reach out to people. Invite them to Sunday lunches with your family. Have members over for dinner at your home once or twice a month. Meet key leaders for early coffee or breakfast before work. Don’t have an agenda for these meals. Simply get to know people. It will build relational capital. More importantly, it’s biblical.

When you have an awkward moment with someone, call them. Pastors use a lot of words, especially lead pastors. You speak, preach, pray, and guide meetings. The sheer volume of words used by pastors means people will misunderstand you, and you will unknowingly misstate your intentions. When you have an awkward moment with someone, call them. Take the initiative to clarify what was spoken. Don’t assume people will figure it out or forget. Clarity is critical to the health of relationships, and you have to take the lead to obtain it.

When you don’t know someone, introduce yourself. Wallflowers are not leaders. Pastors do not have the luxury of hiding in the corners of crowded rooms. Take every opportunity to make an introduction with someone you do not know.

Be the main greeter before and after worship services. Worship services are the perfect opportunities to build relationships. The majority of the church tends to be on campus for worship. Handshakes, hugs, and smiles are quick but powerful reminders that you care for people.

Text people when you pray for them. This one is simple. When you pray for someone, take the extra ten seconds to tell them! Your initiative could brighten someone’s day at just the moment needed.

Hand-write thank you notes. Write a few letters weekly to people in the church who went above and beyond with their service. Five notes a week will yield 260 personal communications—many of which your congregation will keep in a desk drawer or box to be pulled out occasionally and read again. The initiative to write these notes speaks volumes about your passion to care for people.

When someone implies they are struggling, ask them about it. I’ve noticed few people will explicitly state they are struggling. Usually, they speak in a couched tone or with veiled words. When you can tell they are hurting, ask them about it. Rarely will people be offended. Their reserved posture is more of a cry for help than a desire to hide something.

To love Jesus is to feed His sheep. This effort takes initiative, especially within the context of relationships in the church.

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10 Changes Many Pastors Need to Make to Strengthen Evangelism in Our Churches

We at Church Answers have a growing burden to help church leaders and congregations do evangelism in a rapidly changing world. As a pastor and professor, though, I know many of us need to make some changes to take this lead in our churches:

1. Ask God to deepen our personal burden for lost people. If we’re honest, many of us have lost some of our heaviness about lostness and eternal judgment. We need our theology to compel us outward again.

2. Take responsibility for leading our church to do evangelism. As I’ve said before, I have never, in more than 25 years of studying churches, seen an evangelistic congregation without an evangelistic pastor. Evangelism starts with the person in the pulpit week after week.

3. Enlist prayer warriors to pray Ephesians 6:18-20 and Colossians 4:2-4 for us. The apostle Paul requested prayer for boldness, clarity, and opportunity in evangelizing others—including jailors who arrested him in the first place. If Paul needed this prayer support, we pastors do, too.

4. Raise up others to help do pastoral care. We need to be doing this anyway as we equip saints to share the work of ministry, but we especially need to do this if we want to lead the way in evangelism. Ministry to believers can consume all our time if we do it alone.

5. Get outside the office to be among non-believers. Most of us have to build this time intentionally into our calendars. If you take this step, be sure to let your church know what you’re doing so they can pray for you and follow your example.

6. Focus on reaching 2-3 non-believers. Cry out for their salvation (Rom 10:1). Fast on their behalf. Grieve their sin more than they may grieve their own. Trust the Lord wants to save them—and press on evangelistically in faith.

7. Build evangelism mentoring into our ministries. Evangelism training programs are important, but this kind of training starts best in small groups. We can light a fire for evangelism in our congregations by striking the match with just a few members.

8. Lead our congregations to emphasize prayer by name for believers to be witnesses and for non-believers to follow Christ. We can pray generically, “God, make us evangelists and call others to Yourself,”—but a nameless burden is really no burden at all. We pray with the most passion when we can name people who need Jesus.

9. Hold ourselves accountable to other church leaders for our evangelism. That might be other elders, deacons, lay leaders, or even other pastors in the area – but be accountable to someone. What we do as pastors matters.

10. Start today. If you read this post and consider changing something later, it’s likely nothing will change. Do something today.  

Pastors, what might you add to this list?

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You Are My Pastor

You are my pastor.

You spend hours each week preparing a message for me.

You are faithful each week, even if life has been tough for you.

 

You are my pastor.

You told me about a Savior named Jesus.

I accepted him, and my life has been changed forever.

 

You are my pastor.

I woke you up at 1:00 am to tell you my son was in a terrible automobile accident.

You were sitting next to me in the hospital within an hour.

 

You are my pastor.

You were there for me when my marriage was on the rocks.

I never thanked you for the hours you spent with both of us.

 

You are my pastor.

I asked you to pray for me, and you did.

I got a glimpse of your prayer list with so many names on it.

 

You are my pastor.

I criticized you for something you did not deserve.

I realized I was one of the many criticisms you get every month.

 

You are my pastor.

I saw the hours you invested in that family.

They ended up leaving the church because they “weren’t getting fed.”

 

You are my pastor.

I see the exhaustion on your face regularly.

You are trying to meet the needs of your own family and your church family.

 

You are my pastor.

You recently preached at the funeral of one of your close friends.

I saw the tears you tried to hide as you ministered to the family.

 

You are my pastor.

I am amazed at how you love the members of our church.

You will laugh with a child, and you will hug a senior saint without a second thought.

 

You are my pastor.

This week you took a new family in town to lunch.

You love reaching people outside the walls of our church.

 

You are my pastor.

You could have taken another line of work with higher pay and shorter hours.

But you decided to answer a calling rather than accept a job.

 

You are my pastor.

I rarely say thank you or tell you how much I appreciate you.

But I do. I really do love you and appreciate you.

 

You are my pastor.

 

And I thank God that you are.

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Clinging to Hope

One thing I’ve noticed in recent years is that people have no margin. More and more, people from all walks of life seem to be living on the ragged edge of chaos.

one financial crisis away from bankruptcyone blowup away from relational collapseone temptation away from moral failureone calamity away from emotional meltdownone illness away from physical breakdownone doubt away from apostasy

If chaos and calamity haven’t found you yet, it’s only a matter of time before they do. When—not if—that happens to you, where will you go for strength to endure—and for hope to carry on? None of us is exempt from the sudden trials and lingering tribulations of life. None of us.

Throughout 2020 and in the early months of 2021, it seemed everybody around me was dealing with their own calamities. They rolled in like a storm, stopped people in their tracks, and left their victims feeling helpless and even hopeless.

This reality hit hard while I was working on this very book. For about eight months, I lost sight in one eye. It was like a dust storm had blown in from the Texas Panhandle and obscured my vision. With one eye out of commission, the complications began to domino. My depth perception evaporated, and my night vision weakened. That made driving “exciting.” Needless to say, my passengers suggested I give up driving for a while.

Others around me faced their own trials.

A very close friend of mine had to be rushed to the ER in an ambulance. It turned out he not only tested positive for COVID- 19 but also had pneumonia, bronchitis, and strep! They got him to the hospital just in time, but that quartet of troubles could have easily done him in.  I’m sure we could all close our eyes and picture people who didn’t fare as well as my friend did.

Another friend of mine had his daily life come to a screeching halt during the infamous Texas “Icepocalypse” in February 2021. Historic below-freezing temperatures combined with lost power caused a pipe in his home to freeze and burst, flooding his downstairs. In the months it took to repair the damaged house and replace ruined property, everything in his life was put on hold. When something like that T-bones your life, you never really catch up, do you?

I know people who have spent their last cent of borrowed optimism struggling against cancer. They suffered through aggressive chemotherapy, gathered prayer warriors around them who pleaded their case before God, and gripped hope with numb fingers while their suffering tried to rip that hope from them like a thief. Then they went in for a checkup and heard crushing news. Instead of the tumor shrinking, it metastasized. Perhaps you know all too well what that ride home was like or what dinner around the table felt like that evening. How easy to just give up on hope in days of deep disappointment and despair!

We’re living in some tough days, friends. Sudden calamities hit us like nuclear meltdowns. The disaster itself is bad enough. But the aftermath and desolation can linger for years—even decades.

All of us are in desperate need of strength and hope. Life is difficult and demanding. It’s often filled with pain, heartache, setbacks, and detours. Our disappointment in others saddens us. Scandals among those we respect shock us. Disputes in our families, churches, or workplaces demoralize us. When such troubles strike, they can be downright devastating.

But they don’t have to be!

We can endure unexpected calamities. How? By taking our stand on the strong foundation of God’s Word. When trials and tribulations rumble in like a fleet of bulldozers to demolish our lives, we can emerge from the rubble with a strong resolve to recover and rebuild. We don’t have to settle for merely surviving; we can set our sights on thriving.

Our good, powerful, awesome God is inviting each of us to run to Him as our only strong tower, which can never teeter or topple.

In Him alone, we can find the strength and hope to endure.

 

__________________

Learn more about what Scripture says about weather times of trouble, chaos, and calamity in Chuck Swindoll’s newest book, Clinging to Hope.

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Follow-up Calls with Church Guests: What to Do and What Not to Do

Phone calls are an important connection point with church guests. Not all guests will give you their phone numbers. For those who do, here are some guidelines to consider.

What to Do When Calling Church Guests

Clearly identify yourself. Make sure you mention your name and the name of your church. It’s easy to forget this step!

Double-check the name of the person you are calling. I tend to make my phone calls in batches. After I’ve made several phone calls, I can lose track of who I am calling. When making several phone calls in a row, I’ll write the person’s name on a Post-It Note and have it right in front of me. For each call, I’ll use a fresh Post-It Note.

Ask how you can serve them. You should ask every guest if you can help them. People new to the community need help with local connections. People with life changes often have spiritual questions.

Ask if they have prayer requests. One of the best ways a church can serve a guest is through prayer. Always ask guests how you can pray for them.

Ask if they have any questions about the church. Some guests have questions. Most will not ask unless you prompt them. Encourage guests to ask questions. You’ll learn something about your guests and your church through the pattern of questions people ask.

Be kind and brief, and call at a convenient time. Kindness and brevity are a must. Also, early morning calls and late evening calls are ill-advised.

What Not to Do When Calling Church Guests

Don’t wait to follow up. Call within the week of a guest’s visit. A Sunday visitor should receive a phone call by Thursday at the latest.

Don’t ask personal questions. There is a time and place for questions like, “Where do you work?” A phone call with a first-time guest is not one of those occasions.

Don’t use pressure as a tactic. With church guests, you’re not closing a deal. Rather, you should look for avenues to serve them. Aggressiveness is unnecessary and will scare away most people.

Don’t attempt to tell jokes. It’s awkward. Few people can make a good joke over the phone with someone they don’t know.

The phone call is one means of communication with church guests. You should also write a letter and send an email if you have the contact information. Remember, guests will expect phone calls if they give you a number. Don’t miss the opportunity.  

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Ten Reasons Pastor Search Committees Are Struggling More Than Ever

The pandemic is not the reason pastor search committees are struggling, but it did expose and exacerbate the problems. In fact, we at Church Answers see more pastor search committees struggling to find a pastor than at any time we can recall.

We understand that many of you may search for pastors by other means than a search committee. You could have an appointment process, or you could have another group, such as elders, seeking a pastor. These ten reasons are often present regardless of the polity or the process.

1. The search committee does its search like it’s 1980. They gather resumes from several sources. If the church is part of a denomination, it seeks resumes from that body. The members of the search committee painstakingly go through every single resume even though few of them represent candidates who would be a fit. If they contact a candidate, they usually don’t follow up. They keep the candidate hanging and wondering. It is a process headed for failure.

2. They take too long to find a pastor. They usually meet weekly or even less frequently. They assign search committee members a certain number of resumes. They deal with multiple candidates at one time which adds confusion and delays. The process to find a leading candidate can take six months or more. If that candidate does not work out, the process starts over. It’s painstaking. It’s slow. It’s frustrating.

3. The church is unwilling to use a search firm. They are many misperceptions about search firms. No, they do not select the pastor for you. They give you several names for the church to choose from. They understand this world; search committees do not. And please don’t use the modest cost of a search firm to deter you. It becomes much costlier if you don’t find the right candidate.

4. Many search committees are looking for pastors with the same profiles. If you are a pastor looking to move to a church, you are in a good place if you are between the ages of 35 and 49, you have at least 15 years of experience, and you have a perfect family. Other candidates need not apply.

5. Some search committees seek to over-correct the perceived problems of the previous pastor. If the previous pastor was “too evangelistic” and did not meet perceived pastoral care needs, the committee might seek a new pastor who spends 99 percent of the time meeting pastoral needs of the members. Of course, the church will decline since it has no external outreach leadership.

6. Some search committees seek a clone of the previous pastor. This path is less common than it used to be. It might take place if the previous pastor had long tenure, is the founding pastor, or if the pastor died. By the way, if a prospective pastor tries to denigrate the previous pastor, whether that pastor is perceived to be a hero or a mistake, move on to another candidate quickly. The prospective pastor has demonstrated unhealthy insecurity.

7. The church thinks the next pastor will be a silver bullet. The most common perceived expectation of a new pastor is that the church will become younger (one of the reasons every church wants a pastor between the ages of 35 and 49). The silver bullet pastor is hard to find. No, the silver bullet pastor is impossible to find.

8. The church has unreasonable expectations for the new pastor. In addition to the silver bullet syndrome, some search committees have expectations for a pastor that are somewhere between sainthood and sinless. I have collected search committee profiles of prospective pastors over the years. That is a topic for another article on another day.

9. The year 2019 has become nostalgic for churches in general and for pastor search committees in particular. It really has not been that long since 2019. But many churches look at the last pre-pandemic year with longing and nostalgia. Most churches don’t have a realistic perspective of how 2019 really was, but they long to return to that year. Search committees thus seek a pastor who can restore the attendance, programming, and the number of guests back to pre-pandemic levels.

10. Many churches don’t realize that they cannot afford a full-time pastor. I recently met with a pastor search committee that had not been able to move forward for over a year. I asked about the compensation package for the pastor. The amount they gave me was below the poverty line for a family of four. Additionally, they offered no benefits. When I responded that the amount was absurdly low, one search committee member said they were counting on his wife working. Churches must be realistic about this issue. It might be time to look for a bi-vocational or co-vocational pastor.

Though we don’t have quantitative data, we anecdotally see churches taking much longer to find a pastor. These ten reasons at least partially explain the conundrum.

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