Todd Perelmuter's Blog, page 6

Path to Peace How to Live with a Broken Heart in a Broken World

When we look around and see the suffering in this world, it can be easy to wonder what the point of life is. But it is not our world that shows us the suffering. It is our mind.

When we are happy, we notice the kindness and beauty in this world. When we are in pain, we only see the bad stuff.

In today's podcast, I talk about how we can change our mindset, not to tune out the world's problems, but because only by changing our level of consciousness can we actually create real and lasting change in this beautiful world.

Please enjoy other episodes where I share meditation techniques, tips and spiritual lessons from around the world for peaceful and stress-free living. Remember to subscribe to stay up-to-date.

*****
If you ever feel like my words brought a change in your life, and want to show your SUPPORT for what I am doing, click here.

Find all of my BOOKS for wherever you are on your spiritual journey: https://www.eastwesticism.org/spiritual-meditation-books/

Want to gift a book to a prisoner? Go here.

The post Path to Peace How to Live with a Broken Heart in a Broken World appeared first on EastWesticism.

Path to Peace Is Life a Tragedy or a Comedy?

Why do we exist? Are we here to suffer? Is life a tragedy? Or, is life a cosmic joke? Are we the punchline? Is the joke on us? 

Sometimes, it's easy to wonder why we are here on this Earth if life is so full of suffering. But one thing is clear; there is a way out of this suffering. The more seriously we take life, the more we suffer. The more attached we are to the physical world, the more we suffer. And the more consumed we are by desire, the more we suffer.

Only when we tap into the spiritual dimension, can we find the everlasting joy and humor in the physical one.

In today's podcast, I share how we can connect to the deeper reality of our existence. I talk about how to stop taking life so seriously, how to develop a sense of humor about it all, and how to release the immense and needless pressure we put on ourselves.

Please enjoy other episodes where I share meditation techniques, tips and spiritual lessons from around the world for peaceful and stress-free living. Remember to subscribe to stay up-to-date.

*****
If you ever feel like my words brought a change in your life, and want to show your SUPPORT for what I am doing, click here.

Find all of my BOOKS for wherever you are on your spiritual journey: https://www.eastwesticism.org/spiritual-meditation-books/

Want to gift a book to a prisoner? Go here.

The post Path to Peace Is Life a Tragedy or a Comedy? appeared first on EastWesticism.

Path to Peace The Perfect Life Is an Illusion

Our friends, family, neighbors, community, society and the media all tell us what makes a perfect life. It's inescapable. We're supposed to graduate at 18, go to college, get rich, get married, get a house and 2.5 kids all by the time we're 30. We're supposed to remain in the same profession until we retire at 60. And if we do it all just right, we'll be happy.

But human beings are not all the same. What if following the plans of someone else doesn't make us happy? What if our life doesn't line up with society's schedule? How can we follow our own path without letting down our parents and family? And how can we be sure we'll find happiness on an uncharted journey into the complete unknown?

In this podcast, I talk about these questions and more. I discuss what prevents us from being truly happy, why we feel the need to follow someone else's path, and how we can discover the bigger life that was meant for us. I share how to overcome the fear that stops us. And I talk about how to stop always comparing our life to other people's and to what could've been, so we can enjoy the one and only brief ride we have on this remarkable planet.

Please enjoy other episodes where I share meditation techniques, tips and spiritual lessons from around the world for peaceful and stress-free living. Remember to subscribe to stay up-to-date.

*****
If you ever feel like my words brought a change in your life, and want to show your SUPPORT for what I am doing, click here.

Find all of my BOOKS for wherever you are on your spiritual journey: https://www.eastwesticism.org/spiritual-meditation-books/

Want to gift a book to a prisoner? Go here.

The post Path to Peace The Perfect Life Is an Illusion appeared first on EastWesticism.

Path to Peace Life Is a Psychedelic Trip

What is life? What is reality? What is our place in the Universe? Why are we here and what does it all mean? And how can we best go about navigating this chaotic world so that we can have a peaceful life? I answer these questions and more in today's podcast.

Please enjoy other episodes where I share meditation techniques, tips and spiritual lessons from around the world for peaceful and stress-free living. Remember to subscribe to stay up-to-date.

*****
If you ever feel like my words brought a change in your life, and want to show your SUPPORT for what I am doing, click here.

Find all of my BOOKS for wherever you are on your spiritual journey: https://www.eastwesticism.org/spiritual-meditation-books/

Want to gift a book to a prisoner? Go here.

The post Path to Peace Life Is a Psychedelic Trip appeared first on EastWesticism.

How to Keep Unkind Words from Hurting You

You may not know it, but I am by nature a very private person. Even on my spiritual journey that took me around the world, I never posted about my travels. I understand the stress that social media can cause when people see others posting their travel photos, and I didn’t want to contribute to that.

But then I met the remarkable woman who would become my wife. She was shocked that a writer, performer, and full-time talker such as myself didn’t already have a YouTube channel and podcast. She in fact was the person who first encouraged me to share my thoughts online, as she convinced me that my story could really help people.

So I started to open up. I began sharing my observations about spirituality, life, and the nature of mind. And, judging from the overwhelming response I received, it was indeed helping.

Recently, she encouraged me to open up even further, conveying that how I apply these principles to my daily life can provide far more benefit than the lessons alone. As a storyteller, I know that she’s right again. So that is what I will be doing more of in my newsletters. So here we go.

Last week, I was at a live music show with some dear friends. Live music is one of my favorite pastimes. There in the very front row was a fighting couple screaming at each other louder than the musicians on the stage. She would scream something and then he would yell back, and this ball of chaotic energy would be bounced back and forth for much of the evening like a game of volleyball.

We all know the feeling of being yelled at, of unkind words being spoken to us. Have you ever noticed how hard it is to not let cruel words affect you? It’s almost impossible. Unconsciously, we are mirrors for other people’s energy. When someone shows us cruelty, we reflect cruelty back to them. When others are kind, we respond with kindness. 

While it’s nice and pleasant to be surrounded by kindness, being a mirror is a form of slavery. We inescapably become upset by cruelty. We let other people’s behavior affect us immensely. And we inadvertently let the cruelest people steal our joy and kindness away from us.

It feels very liberating to not be a slave in reaction to your thoughts or other people’s thoughts. In fact it is the only true form of freedom. 

So here are three ways to hold onto your happiness and take back your power:

Recognize cruelty as a mental illness.
There is nothing sane about the unkind rantings and ravings of a person. Just because there is no official medical diagnosis for “jerk” doesn’t mean it’s sane. Someone screaming or being intentionally hurtful is clear evidence that they are having a nervous breakdown.

Allow the words to pass by you without acceptance or rejection
We are used to treating people like sane and rational adults. It is natural to try to understand where people are coming from. But when someone is being excessively negative and irrational, it would be equally irrational to try to understand them. Instead, imagine you are looking at them with headphones in your ears. You can hear mumblings and sense their energy, but the words are of little importance. This is how we can not be negatively affected by people who are clearly suffering.

Remain compassionate for the sick.
I wish “jerk” was an official medical diagnosis. It is not healthy for the person, their relationships, or for society. If it were deemed a medical condition, we as family members and friends would find it much easier to remain compassionate. Instead, we often respond to jerks with anger and hatred. So remember, they are the result of immense trauma and suffering. Healthy and well adjusted people do not treat others unkindly. The way people are is rarely a choice. We are all doing our best. Mental illness often goes undiagnosed and even close family members fail to see it after many years. So always remember that we do not know what other people are struggling with, their unkindness is a sign of their pain, and we can always provide the compassionate care (albeit sometimes from a safe distance) that everyone deserves.

Much love,
Todd

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What I’ve Learned from My Travels

When I was a Creative Director in advertising, I had to travel a lot for work and my companies would always put me up in 5-star hotels. It wasn’t the sheets or marble walls or gold trim that impressed me. It was always something that cost absolutely nothing: the attention and generosity of the staff.

I am currently on a family vacation (hence the infrequent newsletters), showing my dear mother-in-law the ocean for her first time. It was reminding me of the old days when I traveled all the time for work. Thinking about my busy travel days, something profound struck me —  treat everyone like they’re your guest at a 5-star hotel. 

Ever since I spent 50 days meditating in a forest by myself, I’ve had no expectations of service or staff because I did everything myself in the forest. Today, every little act of kindness just blows me away and I am overcome with gratitude.

I love to treat the staff and everyone I meet like they’re my customers. I always want to make sure everyone is having a good time. My hope is to live in a world where we all do this for each other, and so I live the example. 

It’s so simple, it improves every relationship, and it makes life a selfless joy. There is no greater feeling than giving. To focus on others’ wellbeing is a hack for getting out of your head and into the present moment.

You can still kick people out if they violate your rules of decency. You can call the cops if they are violent or break the law. But for everyone you allow in, treat them like kings and queens. And don’t forget to treat yourself too. 

Calm yourself before you speak to others. Don’t use something else to calm yourself like tobacco or alcohol or food or other substances. The more you do practice this, the better and faster you’ll get at calming yourself. It’s an important practice.

When you get upset, sit with those feelings. Invite moments of presence by focusing on something peaceful in the here and now, like your breath or surroundings. Remember that whatever or whoever upset you, people often don’t know what they’re doing or saying. People are just acting the only way they know how. Remember to assume the best in people. Give them the same grace you would have wanted before you knew better. And remember that your highest self can hear hurtful words and not let them bother you. Your higher self can laugh it off and pierce through the words, through other people’s hidden pain, and see their loving presence way way deep beneath all the superficial layers of conditioning that they’ve been through and that we’ve all been through. I have shared a 3-step process for ignoring the negative opinions of others in my latest podcast episode.

In addition, in my latest YouTube video, I share the one simple practice to improve all the other aspects of your life. By making this one skill your number one priority, every other priority becomes easier to achieve. Focusing on a million things makes us feel scatterbrained. Focusing on this one thing will allow everything else to fall into place effortlessly. 

Much love,
Todd

P.S. Many of you have asked if an audiobook version of Aloneness to Oneness would be coming out, and I am happy to share that it is now available on Amazon and Audible. When we see only separateness, fear and isolation dominate our lives. When we become one, peace, healing and happiness emerge. I hope you enjoy it.

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What I’m Watching and What I’m Thinking

The Golden Globes and awards season is here. I didn’t watch the Globes, but I do love the modern art of cinema. Few artforms are so captivating, moving, immersive, powerful, persuasive and empathizing. For two hours, you can experience what it is like to forgo identification with the self and identify with the characters in the story instead.

While this escape can become addictive (because dissociation with our ego is extremely pleasurable), in the right doses it can remind us not to take ourselves too seriously or make our stories too important. Films can remind us that our own lives are merely the flickering of light and symphony of sounds. If we get too hung up on the beginning of the story (i.e. the past), we’ll miss out on the story unfolding before our eyes. Watching films can be a fun practice in presence, even though we are transported to a fictional world or a galaxy far far away. They can inspire us, teach us, delight us and connect us. And we all need that.

This year, while I haven’t seen all the nominated films, I (perhaps surprisingly) absolutely loved the film Heretic. I thought its depth and humor made it one of the greatest horror films of all time. You can’t help but love Hugh Grant in this, despite his being a monster.

Deadpool and Wolverine is my kind of movie. Who can’t be charmed by the adorable, The Wild Robot. Gladiator II, Beetlejeuice Beetlejeuice, and Twisters are all fine sequel treatments if the nostalgia is enough to keep a viewer happy. Baby Reindeer and The Penguin were instant classics in my book.

But the one Golden Globe nomination that really impressed me this year was the show, Shogun. Usually my heart is racing and I’m holding my breath watching shows and movies. I have to practice keeping some of my awareness on myself and my breath so I don’t get too lost in the suspenseful stories. But Shogun is like a breath of fresh air. This beautiful show, set in medieval Japan, felt like a Zen meditation. The slower pace of the show along with the beautiful architecture of the time, evoked a feng shui energy that left me feeling deep peace, even if the characters were in almost constant battle. It was such a pleasant surprise to see a film buck the trend of frantic hyperactive pacing, and to be so well received and highly regarded.

So that’s what I thought. Let me know what your favorites were this year. And on this spiritual journey that we’re on, let’s not forget to enjoy the simple and beautiful pleasures of this world. For me, art and music are essential. They are why we’re here — to enjoy and to create. Make your life an art piece, put care and love into everything you do, and life will always be beautiful. 

If you ever feel like your life has taken a detour and want it to get back on track so you can enjoy the journey of life again — twists and turns and all — then this is for you.

Much love,
Todd

PS – Hope you are enjoying the recently released series, Lost and Alone: Secrets of Finding Yourself. The 4th episode is out now in which I explore whether beliefs are something we’re born with, something we learn, or something we can choose. I discuss whether we can only believe what already resonates with our current beliefs and understanding; or if we can reshape and consciously choose our beliefs in order to bring about the most joy, peace, confidence and healing that we can possibly have. Don’t miss the last episode which will be out on Sunday, January 12th, 2025 at 8:00 AM EST on YouTube.

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Peace Begins With You

The world we live in is designed by each of us. We are each totally responsible for the world. You are humanity, you are society, you are the universe. 

Consciousness is the home you live in. You are its creator and caretaker. 

So, what does all this mumbo jumbo mean? Well, it means that if you see people as enemies, you have created the illusion of enemies. It means that when you truly love everyone, when you see the oneness in all beings, then that concept of enemies disappears. 

When you become totally peaceful within, when all internal conflict is eradicated because you no longer live according to your ego, then conflict in the world ceases from your perspective because there is no longer anything to be in conflict with.

This can be hard to understand when we are so used to identifying with our ego and its desires. So here is the best example I have ever seen, and it has nothing to do with being blessed with idyllic circumstances. Mahatma Gandhi fought for the liberation of India, but he never for one minute fought against the British. He simply wanted them to see the wisdom in leaving India. He so loved the British that any violence or ill will toward them literally pained him. In return, any pain the British caused Gandhi pained the British. Even an ounce of anger, hatred or animus from Gandhi would have triggered a feeling of justified violent retribution in the British. Despite their goading, he remained loving. The British were ready for war, but they were not prepared for this.

Gandhi achieved independence peacefully because he had eradicated all division and nourished total peacefulness within himself. He wasn’t simply preaching peace but in private hating the British. He saw the humanity in all beings. He saw himself in the shoes of the British empire.

It’s easy to hate corrupt politicians and point our fingers. But are we not greedy? Do we not want cheap goods, cheap energy, the spoils of war, and the security of a mighty and aggressive military? 

For the record, I am not saying abolish the military. We are not there yet. But I am saying we can abolish the military in our hearts. We can throw off the mental shackles of division, identity, hatred and selfishness. When we do, all that remains is eternal peace. And this is how we change the world.

The first three episodes of the YouTube series, Lost and Alone: The Secrets of Finding Yourself, are out now. You can watch them here.

Wishing you a wonderful new year. May it be a time of peace, growth and reflection.

Much love,
Todd

PS – We all can reach a point where we just don’t feel like doing anything. But why does this happen? Why do we get to a place when we feel like we need Tony Robbins to walk into our bedroom and start yelling at us to get it together? And if we are not close friends with Tony Robbins, what the heck are we supposed to do about it? I talk about what to do when we don’t feel like doing anything in my latest podcast.

P.P.S. The response to last year’s 10,000 Mental Steps Challenge has been overwhelming. So many of you have reached out and shared your stories of transformation and I was moved to tears (good tears). Something resonated about this topic because we all know that we need to move our body every day to stay physically healthy, but nobody tells us the steps we need to take every day to stay mentally fit.

Because so many people have asked how they can share this challenge with friends and family, I am excited to share that the 10,000 Mental Steps book is now available on Amazon. In this book, I expand upon the topics introduced in last year’s newsletter challenge.

All proceeds for this book will go toward helping to bring inner peace and healing to our beloved military veterans. Thank you so much to everyone who took part in the challenge and to everyone who reached out to share their story. Your encouragement inspired me to write this book. I hope it brings you, your loved ones, and our selfless soldiers much peace and happiness.

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Enjoying the Illusion of Life

If you can see it, feel it, hear it or think it, it is an illusion. So yes, kindness and cruelty are both illusions. Pain and pleasure exist in our mind and nowhere else. But that doesn’t mean they’re both meaningless. 

“Illusion” does not mean we dishonor the illusion. We don’t have to ignore it nor neglect it. We also don’t have to get attached to it. Illusion simply means we also recognize the higher truth of this reality. It means that we can stay peaceful no matter what is happening in this Universe because we know it is all part of the show — the dance of light and form and mind.

We don’t have to crave warmth and kindness when the world is cold and dark. We don’t have to hate the cold and darkness either. We can instead love the always-changing nature of this fascinating and rich illusory dimension of reality. 

When we see a magic show, we don’t suffer when the assistant gets cut in half. We don’t get carried away when we watch the magician defy the laws of gravity. We simply marvel at the miracle of perceptual phenomena. Is the Universe that gave rise to all things, including the magic show, any less miraculous?

So rather than focusing on kindness vs cruelty or suffering vs pleasure, focus on loving the whole of this beautiful show. Love the suffering in this world that offers us the chance to help others and ourselves. Love the fruits of our hard-toiled labors. Love the toiling labor for its fruits. Love the doing, love the being, love the whole of life. Not just birth, but death and everything in between. 

In these beautiful and rich lives we lead, sometimes it can be tough to know when to make a change and when to accept our circumstances? Is it better to stay in a familiar and safe situation than it is to take a risk on ourselves? Should we fulfill the expectations of our family or live a life that we find fulfilling?In my latest podcast, I share how we can strike that balance.

When we love everything, warmth and kindness radiate from us so brightly that darkness cannot touch us. 

Lately, it seems like everyone is saying, “These are crazy times.” It’s true. But, these are also the best and most peaceful times. If we only dwell on the negative, we lose sight of a deeper reality. So how can we honor both truths? How can we stay at peace while not burying our head in the sand? More on that in my latest YouTube video.

One final note. As some of you may know, I have been running a book drive to get these transformative teachings into prisons across America. Your generous support has been inspiring and the response we’ve received from prisons and prisoners has been better than we even imagined. The response has been so great that they have asked if we could send even more books. We are just 470 books short of our annual goal to be able to fulfill all these requests. If you are able to donate to this important cause of lifting up our society starting with the people who have fallen the furthest, it would mean the world to me. You can donate here. 

Much love,
Todd

P.S. New Year’s is coming and there is no better time to make big changes in our lives. The problem is, within a couple weeks we fall back into our old habits. This is because we’re focusing on the habits and not the root cause — the mind.

Because so many people reached out to tell me how much they loved last year’s 10,000 Mental Steps Happiness Challenge, and because many people have asked how they can share this challenge with friends and family this year, I am excited to announce that the 10,000 Mental Steps book will be coming soon!

In this book, I expand upon the themes I introduced in last year’s challenge, and all proceeds will go toward helping to bring inner peace and healing to our beloved military veterans. 

Thank you so much to everyone who took part in the challenge and to everyone who reached out to share their story. Your encouragement inspired me to write this book. I hope it brings you, your loved ones, and our selfless soldiers much peace and happiness in 2025.

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How Does Individuality Fit into Oneness

The universe exists on many planes of reality. On one hand, it’s entirely empty space because all matter is made up of empty space. On the other hand, there is no empty space because energy and quantum fields pervade the entire universe. And then there is the illusion that there is stuff and there is space, and the things appear separate and independent from one another.

Any three of these interpretations are going to be incomplete and misleading. Only when we see the whole does some semblance of truth start to emerge. Our existence is no different.

We are the universe, we don’t exist at all the way we appear. And, we think we are separate and independent.

So on one hand, we exist as differentiated consciousness. On the other hand, we exist as universal consciousness. Both are true. But both are incomplete pictures.

To understand the universe, or ourselves, on the level of mind will always be a reductionist approach — limited, incomplete, and false. True understanding comes from sensing, not labeling.

When we popped into existence at birth, the universe had already been humming along for eternity. We are the mere temporary expressions of this magnificent universe. Our illusory individuality is very real and necessary for our survival and for the universe to keep unfolding like an ever-blossoming lotus flower. Our separate sense of self created by the ego, is simultaneously real, limited, and nonreal.

Oneness is the deeper truth, but still incomplete. When the logical mind merges with our expansive heart, a clearer picture of our wholeness emerges. We must honor these bodies and minds we temporarily preside over, but we are also the entire universe, the creation and the creator. Only when we open both eyes can we start to see clearly. 

There are four common mistakes in our thinking that nearly all of us make and that contribute to our suffering. These misguided thoughts that stem from false beliefs cause us to inadvertently harm ourselves, our communities, and our planet. More on this in my podcast.

When oneness guides our individuality, and when our egos recognize our oneness, only then can our lives blossom like the lotus flower. Losing sight of either eliminates our depth of perception, leading us to live shallow and meaningless lives.

When we live purely as individuals we feel alone, we have a fearful ego, and we suffer the stresses and pressures of modern life. In my latest video, I cover the whole topic of stress and how we can stay stress-free in stressful situations.

So without neglecting either reality, by staying present and alert to all of the layers of meaning at once — something which cannot be understood by the mind’s one-word-at-a-time analysis — only then can we develop the deepest understanding, beyond words, of who we truly are. Only then can we become our true self — a being of love and peace. 

Infinity cannot be reduced, interpreted or dissected. No label can capture it. It can only be felt and sensed. This is awakening to reality as it is. Start to pay attention to the energy all around you, the empty space that pervades you, the silence underlying sounds, and the stillness always present within your consciousness that is able to perceive the constant change all around you. This is how we can remain at peace no matter what the superficial illusion of matter appears to be doing at any given moment.

Much love,
Todd

P.S. In my latest podcast episode, I talk about what to do when we have a low day, why we have low days, and what we can do to prevent them from happening in the first place.

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