Sam Pink's Blog, page 82
May 3, 2013
DON'T BELIEVE ANY REVIEW YOU READ
most reviews seem like a combination of vague/abstract/sweeping statements, lies, inaccurate chains of thought, irrelevant information, personal prejudices, blind allegiance to traditions, personal belief in one's ability to judge for others, passive insults, reluctant/qualified acceptance of talent, asskissing, exagerrated statements, reference to older authors and his/her work as template for how one can be better, unresolved psychological issues, jealously, desire for acceptance/shittalking how 'cool' the author and his/her group is, and other insecurities/pettiness.
April 27, 2013
April 25, 2013
inspecting the truly shitty haircut i gave myself, i noti...
inspecting the truly shitty haircut i gave myself, i noticed myself thinking, "well, you really did it this time, chuckles."
April 24, 2013
April 23, 2013
I CAPTIONED A PHOTO I FOUND ON THE MUUMUU HOUSE WEBSITE
this is a picture of mira gonzalez i found on the muummuu house website. it's from a recent reading. i captioned/did notes on the picture. click on the picture to see it better if you want.
1. Spearmint Shirt Lady: the 'coat slung over folded arms' suggests a tired patience, a willingness to listen, but her mind is somewhere else. Thought in her head as this picture was taken: "You know what, I think the radishes will go better with that fish I bought. So yeah, I'll just save the asparagus then, perfect."
2. 'All Bidness/Big Blazer Daddy' : This person is trying to make eye contact with his male friend across the room. Big Blazer Daddy is about to (once he makes eye contact) motion with his fingers back and forth between him and his friend and mouth the words 'should we go' and then make a 'driving' motion with his hands then nod and wink his one eye a little like, 'yeah we'll leave soon.' Thought in his head while this picture was taken: 'I would've eaten more of the free shrimp out in the lobby but that art girl I tried to hit on made a weird face at me. Fuck that shit. Can't be like, held down by that shit, I'm All Bidness/Big Blazer Daddy.'
3. Hiding Girlfriend: Holding that complimentary art museum tote bag like it ain'no thang. She's judging herself and mira--comparing and contrasting--after hearing Big Blazer Daddy remark that he thought mira is 'cute.' Thought in her head as the picture was taken: 'I don't think i'd be able to kill someone if i had to.'
4. Little Daddy Blazer/Belt-Buckle Mang: Wanting to appear both more engaged but also aware of how he looks to others. He's thinking about having sex with mira. thought in his head when the picture was taken: 'Hmm, which book should i mention i just read....in order to get mira to have sex with me.'
5. Greasy Ass Hair: You go girl. Thought in mira's head when the picture was taken: 'Niggas ain't on nothin (nah!)/Don't make me shoot sumpin (bla-ow!)/Doin that gum-bumpin (talkin!)/Now they forrest gumpin' (runnin!)'
6. Authoritative Finger Gesture: the result of vaguely remembering a scathing one-star review on goodreads where the reviewer said something like, 'would've given this no stars but goodreads doesnt allow it.'
7. Timid Art Museum Employee: In a hilarious slip up, they didn't have her name-tag ready (first day) so she went through the day wearing a 'Jerry' name-tag, which resulted in a number of 'Hey Jerry haha' jokes (three of which were from Big Daddy Blazer). Thought in her head when picture was being taken: 'I'm supposed to tell them they have to clear out for the 'guy who covers himself with post-it notes' performance. Can't believe that asshole ate so many shrimp then asked for a tote bag "without a scuff on it" for his girlfriend.'
8. Ominous Person: This person gave mira's book a one star review on amazon because she 'couldn't give it no stars' and now she's come to the museum with the heater to put some holes in mira. Thought in this person's head when the picture was taken: "I like [contemporary indie band]."
9. Gams
1. Spearmint Shirt Lady: the 'coat slung over folded arms' suggests a tired patience, a willingness to listen, but her mind is somewhere else. Thought in her head as this picture was taken: "You know what, I think the radishes will go better with that fish I bought. So yeah, I'll just save the asparagus then, perfect."
2. 'All Bidness/Big Blazer Daddy' : This person is trying to make eye contact with his male friend across the room. Big Blazer Daddy is about to (once he makes eye contact) motion with his fingers back and forth between him and his friend and mouth the words 'should we go' and then make a 'driving' motion with his hands then nod and wink his one eye a little like, 'yeah we'll leave soon.' Thought in his head while this picture was taken: 'I would've eaten more of the free shrimp out in the lobby but that art girl I tried to hit on made a weird face at me. Fuck that shit. Can't be like, held down by that shit, I'm All Bidness/Big Blazer Daddy.'
3. Hiding Girlfriend: Holding that complimentary art museum tote bag like it ain'no thang. She's judging herself and mira--comparing and contrasting--after hearing Big Blazer Daddy remark that he thought mira is 'cute.' Thought in her head as the picture was taken: 'I don't think i'd be able to kill someone if i had to.'
4. Little Daddy Blazer/Belt-Buckle Mang: Wanting to appear both more engaged but also aware of how he looks to others. He's thinking about having sex with mira. thought in his head when the picture was taken: 'Hmm, which book should i mention i just read....in order to get mira to have sex with me.'
5. Greasy Ass Hair: You go girl. Thought in mira's head when the picture was taken: 'Niggas ain't on nothin (nah!)/Don't make me shoot sumpin (bla-ow!)/Doin that gum-bumpin (talkin!)/Now they forrest gumpin' (runnin!)'
6. Authoritative Finger Gesture: the result of vaguely remembering a scathing one-star review on goodreads where the reviewer said something like, 'would've given this no stars but goodreads doesnt allow it.'
7. Timid Art Museum Employee: In a hilarious slip up, they didn't have her name-tag ready (first day) so she went through the day wearing a 'Jerry' name-tag, which resulted in a number of 'Hey Jerry haha' jokes (three of which were from Big Daddy Blazer). Thought in her head when picture was being taken: 'I'm supposed to tell them they have to clear out for the 'guy who covers himself with post-it notes' performance. Can't believe that asshole ate so many shrimp then asked for a tote bag "without a scuff on it" for his girlfriend.'
8. Ominous Person: This person gave mira's book a one star review on amazon because she 'couldn't give it no stars' and now she's come to the museum with the heater to put some holes in mira. Thought in this person's head when the picture was taken: "I like [contemporary indie band]."
9. Gams
April 22, 2013
noticed myself referring to oncoming bad feelings as, 'it...
noticed myself referring to oncoming bad feelings as, 'it's time to return to the crazy cave of doom.'
was at a restaurant eating my food and looking out the wi...
was at a restaurant eating my food and looking out the window when i suddenly felt extremely happy--like drug-like happiness--and it felt like outside was inviting me out and i kept hearing something/somebody saying, 'come on, wake up, you have work to do' and i felt connected to things, and i felt like i was returning somewhere after being somewhere else for a long time, but i knew in like half an hour it would be something i look back on and just smile/laugh.
April 21, 2013
if anybody is filming like, a party/teen movie or whateve...
if anybody is filming like, a party/teen movie or whatever, i'm interesting in playing an older burnout character named like, 'Shlong' or something, and i'll wear a red bandana and leather coat and umbros, or just maybe a bathrobe with a red bandana on and i'll always be eating lunchables and one of the jokes in the movie can be that i make out with an old woman or like, i accidentally make out with a dog/monkey because of how fucked up i am.
April 20, 2013
i feel like if i was secretly videotaped today it would b...
i feel like if i was secretly videotaped today it would be good footage for a 'depression hurts' commercial and/or a commercial where they talk about 'that not-so-clean feeling.'
also, i feel attracted to the women in the 'not so clean feeling' commercials, where they're just sitting on the couch wearing a hoodie with the hood on and they're like, hugging themselves.
also, i feel attracted to the women in the 'not so clean feeling' commercials, where they're just sitting on the couch wearing a hoodie with the hood on and they're like, hugging themselves.
