D M Roberts's Blog, page 7

Cooking, are women supposed to love it?

What could you do less of?

The thing is, you are expected to enjoy cooking as a female. I definitely do not. It’s not that I can’t cook or that I can’t cook well, I can. But do I enjoy it? Absolutely no with a passion.

I think like many mums, I have done way too much of it over the years. I’ve practically done 3 meals a day for what seems like forever. I’ve gone through the kids phases where they all want different meals, they don’t like this and they don’t like that.

So in fact I could do less of cooking.

Personal choice

What are your feelings about eating meat?

I don’t eat meat. Let me clarify that sentence (as I often have to) I simply don’t like it. I have never liked meat, not the taste or the texture. More than this I absolutely don’t like meat substitute products.

Not for me

You can imagine my joy when I hear “We got something especially for you because we know you’re a vegetarian.” But I’m polite, what can I say? Pass the mayo, lots of it.

My thing

I am perfectly happy eating veggies. I am okay with cooking a steak or beef casserole for others. I appreciate and respect those that are against eating meat. Let’s face it, we are all different in our views.

Life

Do you need time?

When I was young I thought of time as a thing that stretched on forever, if anything, there was too much of it. The possibility of it running out was never even a droplet of a thought in my mind so, I did not concern myself with this seemingly limitless concept reaching its finality.

Sands of time wait for no-one

I thought anyone above the age of 20 years was old and how long must it have taken them to reach their grand age. Not unlike most youngsters there were times when I couldn’t wait to be older and to be able to do the things that ‘grown-ups’ got to do. As a child it seemed I was forever hearing that I wasn’t old enough for this or that. I had a theory that I would make a mountain of money then travel the world as a great explorer. It most likely would take me 100 years or so to get around the world but that was fine, after all, the world was a big place and time was infinite.

One foot in front of the other

As with many best laid plans, I did not make that mountain of money and I most definitely did not travel the world. Life seemed to get in the way, as life often does. It is said that John Lennon once uttered ‘life is what happens when you’re busy making plans ‘ or some such phrase, how true is that. I watch in awe and admiration now as nephews and nieces post up photos on social media of their remarkable travels. Do I envy them? No, envy is too strong a sentiment that to me doesn’t sound very complimentary, I applaud their bravery and wish them nothing but amazing adventures. Would I change my life? Absolutely not, I cherish the children I have and the people I have known.

Family

But, time is not infinite to us mere mortals. In fact, there is never enough of it. I lost another sister at the beginning of the month, like the 2 that passed before her she was no age to be taken so soon and yet, in what seems like a split second, she was gone. It conjures up a multitude of overwhelming emotions that you cannot make sense of. You can’t speak because that would make it real, it is too soon to be real. This in itself gives off the impression that you are strong when in reality you are far from it. A rock that has been there since forever has been tossed out to sea by the great leveller known as Time, it didn’t ask if we needed more of it, it simply acted of its own accord leaving a helpless numb feeling that once again tears through a family.

R.I.P xxx

In answer to the title, yes, more time would have been a gift.

Stand back

Stand back and watch the world, the  noisy encroaching herd

Stand and watch the crazy ways, the hoard that steals our simple days

Stand and listen to the story unfold of progress and the price we’ll pay

Do you hear the changes in the polluted air

Tip toeing into your daily ways

Creeping at first they develop a trot, a little here, a little more there,  not changing much, you barely notice 

Stand back and watch the world, listen to the gallop that thunders in your ears buds 

 Listen as life speeds up around you,  

Listen as you’re instructed what to do

Stand back my friends and nothing will change

Stand up instead let simplicity remain

Feelings

How are you feeling right now?

‘Do what you can, with what you have, where you are.’

-Theodore Roosevelt

How am I feeling right now…well that’s a good question. Normally I would say I’m fine when asked, as we all mostly do, but, here we go.

Firstly,I cannot believe how quickly the year is going by.
I have to admit that I have done very little writing this past 12 months and even less conversing with people.
I really do miss that aspect of my life, picking the phone up and chatting with loved ones is a wonderful feeling, then there is writing, my sanctuary from the harshness of the world where I can escape into simpler times.

Communication

Work life has been full on and a few times I have found myself completely overwhelmed. On the whole the people I work with are a great bunch, this is not in any way directed at them.
I’m blessed with the most easy going nature and an endless supply of patience yet even I have found myself wanting to bang my head against the wall at times – not a feeling I’m proud of but there you have it – obviously I haven’t.

The events calendar that occupies most weekends from April to October is, as ever, fun and mentally lifting – if a tad tiring on those early mornings – still, it keeps you active.

With winter fast approaching I can’t help but daydream about sleeping in on the odd Saturday/Sunday morning. I appreciate this may not seem like the most exciting thing to daydream about but truth be told I am exhausted.

I had my first experience of the dreaded covid last month – I assumed I was superhuman for a while having avoided it for so long – it wiped the floor with me, I understand how fortunate I am in comparison to so many that didn’t fare as well, all the same I don’t think I want that again thank you.

Today I met up with my sister, she doesn’t live very far away from me but with her rota and mine we haven’t had the same day off in some months. We did the usual browsing and catching up but again the time just flew. All the same it was a lovely day. I got to hear all about her trip to the Pride festival in the North of England, something she travels to take part in every year.

So, tomorrow it’s back to work after a good day off.
There you have it, few extra days in the week would be greatly appreciated.
Stay well

A Quiet Place

What brings you peace?

Faith

I wouldn’t say that I’m an overly religious person, that said I completely respect the faith of others. I believe in faith, I believe in hope. Most of all I believe that whatever gives you comfort in those times when you feel totally alone and without direction you should have that one thing you can call your own to draw strength from.

Peaceful solitude

I often find this to be music. Music has immeasurable power beyond our comprehension. Music can take you from happy to sad and vice versa within a few notes. Music conjures up long lost memories whether they’re good or bad, pinpointing specific dates, people or pivotal events. One song can whisk you back to childhood or throw you headfirst into your 20’s, 30’s and so on.

Free images

For real peace, the type that settles my mind and spirit in ways that nothing else can I find I am drawn to one of 2 places.

The first being a church, it really doesn’t matter to me which church, denomination or faith as long as the door is unlocked and I can go inside to sit a while, get my bearings back so to speak. I don’t need to think or speak to anyone, simply sit. There is a comforting calmness washes over me that reminds me I am but a speck in this vast world, that whatever issues I may be dealing with are too a speck of dust that will blow away in the blink of an eye.

Dust in the wind

My 2nd place is the sea. The sea and I have a very healthy respect for each other. I’m incredibly lucky to be able to get to the coast everyday if I wanted to, 15 minutes away on a quiet traffic day. I’m not a sun worshipper so will, instead, walk along the shoreline listening to the waves, feeling the breeze on my skin. There are many beautiful things in this world, in my mind nothing comes close to the hypnotically stunning sunsets over the water.

Seascapes

Whatever gives you peace is the universes gift to you , embrace your gift. Use it as little or as often as you need to.

So, this is Summer

Scour the news for an entirely uninteresting story. Consider how it connects to your life. Write about that.

‘South East Water hosepipe ban affecting Kent and Sussex to be lifted immediately‘ and then we laughed and laughed… No, seriously I did laugh. It seemed we had one sunny day – I can’t actually recall the date and it seems a distant memory now- then BAM!! Hosepipe ban. Here in the South you have to understand that the ban had literally just been lifted when it was reinstated, I imagine due to the amazing summer that was expected coupled with the inadequate attempts to plug leaking pipes left, right and centre.

Splish splash I was…

Let’s face it, whilst the world and his wife have been sweltering in record heat, here in Blighty, Summer has decided that it simply cannot be bothered this year. Not unlike a sulky teen that has been asked to clean up their bedroom. Sure, they have picked up a stray moldy plate here and there but, is it to the exasperated parents liking? Not one jot, not even a job half done.

Tenor

It’s only weather, some might say, and they would be correct. People have it worse and people have it better depending on where they are. The trouble with grey weather is our mood and mindset.

Grey

Grey days give way to feelings of lethargy. As a young cashier said to me today “it feels like we’re having a mild winter”. Whereas a freezing day in January can lift a person’s spirit simply because the sky is blue and the sun is shining. I’m a firm believer that bright days bring out the best in people, they smile more, do more.

Live in the light

In an age where we are all (hopefully) water waste conscious how does this quiet story connect? Autumn is fast approaching as are darker nights. I am a soul guided by brightness, optimism and happy thoughts. I had counted on a sprinkling of unmistakable summer blue sky, freshly cut grass smells and garden fetes to tide me over for another year.

Tenor

Next year, I’m crowd funding a 4 week research trip to the Bahamas stay well and keep smiling.

Words

What are you curious about?

Okay, I love words, whether they’re written, spoken or sung.

I have a strange -if only to myself – fascination and manic curiosity as to where certain words, names or sayings come from. I mean, who decided that rain means rain? How did it catch on? It’s not like they had the Internet back at the beginning of existence to put that out there. This word will mean water will fall from the sky, it will from this day forth be known as Rain.

As crazy as it sounds I study street names, playing a game in my head as to why a street or road is named what it is… I sometimes come to the conclusion that maybe the person naming it simply lacked any imagination. For example, the street, ash tree road, coldblow lane. These are but a tiny example of names that could have been so much more for a landmark that, let’s face it, will most likely be there for a very long time. Bolderwood Arboretum Ornamental Drive is a place in the New Forrest UK, now that’s using your imagination, granted it will probably never fit in the small box on a form you might be filling in but, it’s interesting.

Photos courtesy of Tumour/web

Words are an amazing tool, we use them everyday and seldom wonder what their origins are. I love words such as Discombobulate (confused , disordered) Onomatopoeia (sounds like the word) Conundrum (confusing problem), Serendipity (happy & accidental discovery) great words but how did they come to be? If you know, drop me a line.

Splash

So good people, this is my curiosity. It has me constantly talking to myself and looking up origins, kind of a Call my Bluff pastime.

Let’s skip the obvious.

If you could host a dinner and anyone you invite was sure to come, who would you invite?

The obvious being Marilyn Monroe, Winston Churchill, Abraham Lincoln. Right, that’s my go to guests out of the way. If I’m hosting a dinner party I want some fun guests, life can be so hard that a little levity would go a long way.

Freddie Starr, even now when I watch clips of this fella, he still manages to have me laughing until my ribs hurt. Freddie was from a time when a comedian could be a comedian. We weren’t offended, we took his humour in the way it was meant to be taken. He poked fun at everything and everyone including himself.

My next guest would be Spike Milligan. A classic British comedian that wrote some amazing nonsensical verses, starred in multiple movies all whilst battling manic depression. Spike Milligan reminds me of my younger days, watching comedy before the “sensitivities” arrived. A time when people took a joke as a joke and never a personal slight.

My mother would be number one on my list. To be able to sit and spend time with her would be the most precious gift.

My grandad, sadly passed when I was a kid but a man I remember as a kind person. A man I have never heard a bad word about in all my years. I would ask him about his life and where he came from.

I would have Stephen Fry as a guest, such an intelligent, funny man. I imagine he has some great and humourous takes to tell.

Freddie Mercury, George Michael, David Bowie, Kurt Cobain and Marc Boland would be my super group for the evening. I know many would go with the Beatles, Elvis, Mozart etc but it’s my party as the song goes.

Serving I’d be tempted to go with the crew from Fawlty Towers, that would be a scream in itself.

Who would sit at your table?

Music and me

What is your favorite genre of music?

Honestly, I love music, all kinds of music. To ask me what my favorite genre is, well that’s the question I could not possibly answer.

What a gift

I couldn’t even tell you what my favorite group, artist is. I could start by naming one, that would remind me of another and before you know where you are my list is a mile long.

Open your mind and your ears

Music to me is like breathing, I can’t imagine not having it in my life.

Growing up I guess I was fortunate having parents that always had music – my mother was a singer long before she had children and marriage, sadly passing when I was a kid – my siblings being mostly older would have the most diverse collection of tunes blaring out from Barry Manilow to David Bowie.

You remember this…

We, as children were practically pushed into school plays, always including a song or 10… I think I must have been the only 7 year old that knew all the words to the amazing Billie Holiday s Summer Time!

Feed your soul

The first time I heard Madame Butterfly was mind-blowing as was the first time I heard George Michael, Freddie Mercury.

This is a list of instantly recognisable songs to me, from the second they start to play.

Mr Blue Sky
Don’t go breaking my heart
Dancing queen
Man-eater
The tide is high
Love me do
Native New Yorker
Living Doll
Oh Lori
Chantilly lace

Do you have a similar list?

Questions and answers

Music takes me to so many amazing places, always has and always will. Do I have a favorite genre, no. Does that bother me, not in the slightest.

Nothing better than a concert atmosphere