Andrew Moore's Blog, page 9

Conjunction Function

I think the convential understanding is that asyndeton gives an impression of hurry and rudeness in narration, but I contend polysyndeton does that better. It's how children tell stories, after all.

Galactic Ruse

Scientifically speaking, what are the chances that all of space we can observe is a big prank? Basically a huge soundstage? I think it has to be close to 92%.

This Is No Longer Acceptable

We've been putting up with it till now, but stop saying "bend the knee" outside of A Song of Ice and Fire. The word is "genuflect," or if that's too fancy for you, "kneel." While we're at it, "bannermen" is not a general term, "vassal" is, and variant spellings of "sir" aren't getting you anywhere. I'm speaking especially to video game translators.

Rule of Power

Once, the people were distraught at the state of their laws and begged for a lawgiver to come to them. Hearing their supplication, Power Dragon descended.
"Shouldn't Law Dragon have come?" the people asked.
"I am stronger than Law Dragon. Therefore I conquered him and assumed his role."
From that, the people learned one important law. They desired to have more laws still but were perplexed by manifold considerations and subtleties.
"Then let the strongest among you decide."
"Is strength same as wisdom?" the people wondered.
"By no means!" Reason Dragon declared that during his descent. Soon Mercy Dragon and Harmony Dragon arrived as well. Their discourse on the science of law soon became bickering.
Power Dragon allowed them to engage in that for a moderate interval before he slapped all three away with his terrible claws and sent them tumbling. He departed without another word, confident the people comprehended the incident's significance.
Finis

A Caution

While we all know printer's devils are less cool than the name makes them sound, it's a mistake to make them into actual devils. It's too cutesy. If anyone has already done that, I forgive you, but cut it out.

Timing Your Release

Donkey Kong Bananza is almost out. Have you completed you banana fantasy story yet? Or was it bananapunk or a banana opera? I don't know what any of those things are, which is why I'm not rich.

Speaking of TCGs

If nerds like cards so much, why aren't books printed on cards? That way, putting them together in the right order is a fun puzzle, plus you can charge them a thousand times for a short novel.

Shaping Up

You've heard of round worlds and you've heard of flat worlds, but have you ever heard of ribbon-like worlds? Probably, followed by ". . . seemed like a neat idea but I couldn't think of anything that would do for the story." That kind of thinking is why we haven't colonized the sun yet.

Unbeatable Idea for the Next Magic: The Gathering Set

Harry Potter.

Unbeatable Idea for the Next Yu-Gi-Oh Archetype

Summer Skull. Think about it. More importantly, think about a mobile game that isn't a simulator, and also it's a crossover game with every trading card game, and it's a gacha. Tower defense? Maybe.