Andrew Moore's Blog, page 6

Draconic Lifecycle

I know we've all considered the possibility that planets are dragon eggs waiting to hatch and wondered what will happen to us when the time comes, but have you considered that these eggs might not have been fertilized yet? What's that going to be like? That's why I support migration beyond the planet as soon as it can be effected.

Addendest

All this time, have angry ghosts been mad about inflation? Almost certainly.

Addender

Even worse, to ghosts, because they will have died long ago, $43,500 will be a lot of money, whereas that will be affordable if a significan expense for the contemporary traveler.

Addendum

Unfortunately for them, by then we'll have the technology to detect ghosts and subsequently demand fares.

Futurestition

When we go to space, will we have to wait for new ghosts to populate the haunted places, or will some grab rides alongside the living passengers? That's aside from the ghosts of long-dead species, whose menaces we will be incapable of comprehending or even noticing.

Visions of Future Anarchy

The first cruel robber asked travelers for the time. When they looked at their watches, he grabbed their feet and swung them against a tree. Knowing that, the hero approached him.
"Excuse me, sir. Do you know what time it is?"
"No, but you can look at my watch. I wear it around my ankle."
"Eh?"
Pow! The hero kicked the bandit against the tree and killed him.
The second cruel robber invited travelers to rest in a cottage. When polite visitors removed their shoes and stepped inside, the treacherous floor dropped them into a boiling cauldron. Knowing that, the hero approached him.
"Excuse me, sir. You look like someone who needs a break."
"Thank you. I'll just take off my boots."
"Eh?"
Entranced by the valuable watch, studded with gems but nevertheless tasteful, the robber failed to resist in time and was thrown into his own trap. Splash!
The third cruel robber gave travelers a remote control and suggested they watch their favorite program on his gigantic television set. Too bad for them, the remote was a bomb. Knowing that, the hero approached him.
"Excuse me, sir. Why not sit down on this couch and watch your favorite program?"
"It isn't on yet. Here, check this watch."
"And a fine watch that is. I bet it could bring . . . eh?"
Smash! The hero brought the TV down on the robber's head. With that, the road was safe at last.
Finis

Dragon Fashion

More dragons should dress up all fancy. I'm sure some do, in some books, but it should be widespread. Entire countries should be compelled to knit nice dragon hats.

Addendum

We won't be able to ask them to rate poets, though. Any intelligent species capable of navigating the well-starred plain will have long since ditched poetry.

Reasons to Strive for Peaceful Relations With Aliens

1. Lack of annihilation
2. Technology exchange
3. Alliance against meaner aliens
4. Asking them which decade has the best music
5. Trade
6. Collaborative planetary development

Appropriate Cast Size for a Novel

It was 108 centuries ago, and that was just the heroes.* Aren't you ashamed if you have fewer than 1,080 today?



*Or "heroes," if you prefer.