Andrew Moore's Blog, page 153
July 12, 2021
Clarification
So let me get this straight. It's called Super Robot Wars 30, but it doesn't have 30 shows? I see. It won't have 30 stages either, will it? 62 or some ungodly number like that, no doubt. At least let us upgrade bars 30 times.
Dreams of Steel
One day a certain king of a certain land summoned all his priests to his court to his interpret his dream, as it seemed to him portentous. In the dream, he stood atop the castle, on the very highest point while winds blew about his stately robes, and raised his right arm. Then appeared to him a pillar of darkness taller than the castle, and he heard a voice telling him the sentinel of steel had arrived. He asked what this might mean.
The priests conferred with one another and whatever gods listened to them and reported that the interpretation of the dream was simple. The king needed to build a giant robot.
"What is that?" the king asked, and none knew. They insisted, however, the gods had told them that with no room for mistakes or mishearing.
Bewildered but pious, the king ordered all his smiths and craftsmen to build a giant robot. They had no more idea than he what that might mean, but they went to their tables and forges regardless and took up their tools. Miraculous to say, the gods guided their hands for days upon days of measuring, cutting, shaping, and smoothing. For months they worked, and at the end they had fabricated a steel giant with arms like round towers and a kingly crown on its head.
The king inspected it and sat on the throne placed in the middle of the construct, and his hands moved as well by divine inspiration. The giant rose, walked, and then ran around the castle.
White light filled the sky and columns stretched to the earth. All the gods appeared, something never seen before in that kingdom but only in the holy lands far away. They watched the king maneuver the giant robot and clapped.
The king made his giant kneel and spoke, bowing his own head. "O great gods, why did you command me to build this? What more may I do for you?"
The chief of the gods responded. "We just wanted to see a giant robot. Look how cool it is. Man. You don't have to do anything else. Be of good cheer, because nobody's gonna mess with you in that thing."
The gods ascended and left the king and his people there in awed wonderment. Over the years after that, they learned it was true that nobody wanted to mess with the kingdom that owned a big robot, and the kingdom knew such peace and prosperity as it never had before.
Finis
The priests conferred with one another and whatever gods listened to them and reported that the interpretation of the dream was simple. The king needed to build a giant robot.
"What is that?" the king asked, and none knew. They insisted, however, the gods had told them that with no room for mistakes or mishearing.
Bewildered but pious, the king ordered all his smiths and craftsmen to build a giant robot. They had no more idea than he what that might mean, but they went to their tables and forges regardless and took up their tools. Miraculous to say, the gods guided their hands for days upon days of measuring, cutting, shaping, and smoothing. For months they worked, and at the end they had fabricated a steel giant with arms like round towers and a kingly crown on its head.
The king inspected it and sat on the throne placed in the middle of the construct, and his hands moved as well by divine inspiration. The giant rose, walked, and then ran around the castle.
White light filled the sky and columns stretched to the earth. All the gods appeared, something never seen before in that kingdom but only in the holy lands far away. They watched the king maneuver the giant robot and clapped.
The king made his giant kneel and spoke, bowing his own head. "O great gods, why did you command me to build this? What more may I do for you?"
The chief of the gods responded. "We just wanted to see a giant robot. Look how cool it is. Man. You don't have to do anything else. Be of good cheer, because nobody's gonna mess with you in that thing."
The gods ascended and left the king and his people there in awed wonderment. Over the years after that, they learned it was true that nobody wanted to mess with the kingdom that owned a big robot, and the kingdom knew such peace and prosperity as it never had before.
Finis
July 11, 2021
Bargaining
J-Decker this time means Dagwon next time, right? Right.
July 10, 2021
Q&A
Q. If the G-Arcane gets in, will it transform?
A. No.
A. No.
A Sad Scene
"It's finally time for L-Gaim," you say, weeping into your applesauce. Somewhere, a dog howls.
July 9, 2021
The Thanksgiving of Steel Approaches
Super Robot Wars announcements are coming in soon, so make your wishlists. It wouldn't do not to be disappointed when Dagwon doesn't make it in again.
July 7, 2021
False Advertsing
I read Prince of Tennis, and even though it had Prince in the title, it wasn't fantasy at all! Well, it kinda was.
The End of Science Fiction
New Switch with an OLED screen? There's nothing left to speculate. We've figured everything out.
July 6, 2021
The Dilemma at the Heart of Man
I think of myself as someone who doesn't care much for non-human fantasy races, but most of my favorite fantasy has non-human races. Can we ever know ourselves?
July 5, 2021
The First Stars
The crew hauled over another crate and forced off the lid. Two of the men hoisted the dull gray lump and fit it in the cannon, and a susurrus ran up and down the crowd on the hill a safe distance behind. The cannoneers confirmed the direction, assumed their positions, dropped protective bindings over their eyes, and fired.
The inert byproduct of the archsages' miraculous processes activated for the last time, as if it remembered it used to be dragon hearts, unicorn horns, naga skins, and other fabulous items and flared with pride. The cannon propelled the magically active mass into the night sky where it took its place next to the other waste as a light shining forever.
The crowd cheered and marveled that even the refuse of their mighty civilization could decorate the heavens so magnificently. Romantics looked forward to a night sky brighter than the day, while realists asked where they would find enough dragons for that.
The crew worked throughout the night in front of the admiring crowd, and the results persist above us.
Finis
The inert byproduct of the archsages' miraculous processes activated for the last time, as if it remembered it used to be dragon hearts, unicorn horns, naga skins, and other fabulous items and flared with pride. The cannon propelled the magically active mass into the night sky where it took its place next to the other waste as a light shining forever.
The crowd cheered and marveled that even the refuse of their mighty civilization could decorate the heavens so magnificently. Romantics looked forward to a night sky brighter than the day, while realists asked where they would find enough dragons for that.
The crew worked throughout the night in front of the admiring crowd, and the results persist above us.
Finis
