Andrew Moore's Blog, page 156

The Bright Side

Now that games are dead, we'll all have much more time to spend reading blogs, commenting on blogs, and throwing money at writers of blogs. It's like horse armor, but you don't get armor and there's no horse. Possibly a horse face though.

Just to be Clear

Tales of Arise looks terrible, doesn't it? It isn't just me, right? Both visually and in the indications of plot and characters and whatnot. Completely ugly and joyless with no real style.

My Deepest Apologies

January 2022, not Holiday 2022. So far. Who releases games in January?

E3 Fever

I'm burning up! With E3 fever! Vision growing dim! Leaks everywhere! I don't know if I'll make it long enough to check out some gameplay-free trailers for games set to come out Holiday 2022, half of which will never make it to release! Tell my wife I married her for social status!

More Like Final Fortnitasy

While my official position is that I'm going to mock that Final Fantasy battle royale game for being a Final Fantasy battle royale game, if it weren't mobile I'd probably play it.

Behind the Curtains

And that's how people come up with fantasy and science fiction settings. Bet you didn't know that. Also, if you look around carefully, maybe you can figure out who won the discus throwing competition before your world was made.

World's End Track Meet

"Welcome, everyone, to the World's End Track Meet!" The man with the megaphone waited for the cheers and hoots to exhaust themselves before he continued. "We have been assigned the duty and honor of determining the nature of the new world to be created after the old world ends. Not our world, of course!" He paused for laughter but heard more hooting and pious chants instead.
"You can see the hurdles set up on the track for the first race. Our competitors will be running and jumping for the right to make some tricky decisions about gravity. Inside the track our discus throwers are warming up for optimal performance, and with good reason. The stakes are high: Will the new world have elves in it?" The favorite in the discus, a dwarf, paused to look at the stands and wink. The crowd went wild, especially the elven members of it.
"On the north side we have lovely targets set up for our archers to test their skills and whether the gods will intervene in person, through dreams and signs, or not at all. The south side is perfect for pole vaulting and naming the longest river, not to mention deciding how long and wide it will be." The vaulters waved.
"That's it for the first set of events, but don't forget to refresh yourself with fruit-flavored snow cones at Stations 1 through 6. Hey, what's with those numbers? That's right! The most popular station's number equals the number of moons, so remember to vote with your tongues!" The station attendants smiled, number 3's widest of all. Cherry always won.
"The hurdles will start in a minute. Before that, though, let's all give a huge round of applause and prayer to our sponsors, Hystar World Ender and Protar World Maker! None of this would be possible without their support and infinite godly might." The crowd and participants all clapped as if their lives depended on it, which they almost certainly did not. Nobody wanted to risk dying before seeing the three-legged race, though.
Finis

Character Motivations

Nothing is more important in a story than for the protagonist to have goals the audience can understand. If you're having trouble coming up with one, here are some examples:

1. Adventure
2. Adventure
3. Adventure

Ancient Wisdom

You might be wondering if you can put some big muscley arms on your sentient spaceship, but buddy, the arcades beat you to that long ago.

The Latest Twist

But if the evil demon hellship . . . is the good guy? Dun dun dunnnn!