Andrew Moore's Blog, page 154
July 4, 2021
The Fundamentals
Not even a Middle Earth side-scrolling platformer where you wander around open levels until you collect 100 rings!
July 2, 2021
Priorities
They're making some Middle Earth TV show when they haven't even made a Middle Earth city builder or Middle Earth The Sims yet. What's the big idea?
July 1, 2021
Sobering Thoughts
Today Sword Art Online Memory Defrag, tomorrow you or me. Let's hope you.
Inspirational Quotations
"Madam, I may be drunk, but you are ugly. Tomorrow I shall be reincarnated at level one in another world, but you shall still be ugly." - Winston Truckkilled
June 30, 2021
The Wave of Tomorrow
Everybody who's anybody is writing directions in numpad notation. Get with the times, gramps. Whether you live in Germany, Uganda, New Zealand, Virginia, or 4 Virginia, catch the wave today.
June 29, 2021
Q&A Corner
Q. Why is there so much medieval fantasy?
A. Because anything with a king in it gets called medieval.
A. Because anything with a king in it gets called medieval.
June 28, 2021
What Cannot Be Escaped
The stomping and scraping of the site workers that preceded the sun's setting by a little did not divert the Chief Reclaimer's attention, and he only raised a hand in response to the evening farewells. "Goodnight, Chief. Don't stay up too long, Chief." They knew the inevitability of his staying up too long, but wanted to say something. There were worse bosses in their field.
He worked long after the sun set with a single lantern in its place, dusting every speck of dirt and debris off the ancient relics that made the Old Pile worth excavating by the state while night and silence surrounded him.
"Your eyesight won't thank you for these late nights." The silence ended, and the Chief Reclaimer stood and turned around.
"Oh, ah, who . . . may I help you?" He saw a man, or so he supposed, but what he perceived was the edge of a blade, shining scarlet in the dark. "That's . . ."
"It is. You may help me by not moving. I was paid to do this." Halfway through those words, the Chief Reclaimer ran and the other followed. Both stumbled, the latter from unfamiliarity and the latter from stiffness and terror of that blade which belonged to the sword which cleaved might from main, forged by goblins in ages past. He knew of it as any scholar would and feared it.
He stumbled more and longer between the two, unequal to the chase. At last he collapsed and twisted, holding up an arm despite knowing nothing could stop the Sword of Exhaustion. It swung, and that was the end.
The Chief Reclaimer awoke the next day in his bed in town, late for work and feeling better than he had in years. He might have felt better yet had he been given a chance to examine that strange man's relic, but nothing could be done about that.
Finis
He worked long after the sun set with a single lantern in its place, dusting every speck of dirt and debris off the ancient relics that made the Old Pile worth excavating by the state while night and silence surrounded him.
"Your eyesight won't thank you for these late nights." The silence ended, and the Chief Reclaimer stood and turned around.
"Oh, ah, who . . . may I help you?" He saw a man, or so he supposed, but what he perceived was the edge of a blade, shining scarlet in the dark. "That's . . ."
"It is. You may help me by not moving. I was paid to do this." Halfway through those words, the Chief Reclaimer ran and the other followed. Both stumbled, the latter from unfamiliarity and the latter from stiffness and terror of that blade which belonged to the sword which cleaved might from main, forged by goblins in ages past. He knew of it as any scholar would and feared it.
He stumbled more and longer between the two, unequal to the chase. At last he collapsed and twisted, holding up an arm despite knowing nothing could stop the Sword of Exhaustion. It swung, and that was the end.
The Chief Reclaimer awoke the next day in his bed in town, late for work and feeling better than he had in years. He might have felt better yet had he been given a chance to examine that strange man's relic, but nothing could be done about that.
Finis
June 25, 2021
Expand Your Dreams
You: King Arthur, but gritty
Them: King Arthur, but there's a million of them
Them: King Arthur, but there's a million of them
June 24, 2021
Stellar Elaboration
If your tough priest story involves spaceships, does that mean an entire spaceship has to wear an animal mascot costume? Yes.
Important Reminder
You should probably have your tough priest dress up as an animal mascot at some point. This is an essential aspect of storytelling.
