Jen Lancaster's Blog, page 23

What's In Your Beach Bag? (Memoir Edition)

I planned to put out my summer reading list last Friday, but I was waylaid by a stupid afternoon spent at the hospital and it threw off the rest of my weekend. Apparently there's nothing wrong with me that can't be fixed with Xanax (or ice cream) as it turns out everything is stress-related. Honestly, I'm fine, but I'll be even better once I'm able to check a few items off my to-do list. As my summer reading list is on said list, let's get to it. I've broken the books out into category, so th...

Fletcher's Choice: Like Sophie's Choice But Without All The Nazis - UPDATED

Setting: My kitchen, twenty minutes ago. Fletch: Do these new gym shorts shorts look okay? Me: (not looking because I'm busy making coffee) They're fine. Fletch: How about the shirt? It's new, too. Me: (pouring, not looking) S'fine. (adding cream and Splenda, then glancing at clock) Hey, it's already 8:30. How are you going to work out and then have enough time to get to your 10:15 facial? Fletch: Shit, is that this morning? And I thought I didn't have to go until 11:15. Are you sure? Me: Yep...

Fletcher's Choice: Like Sophie's Choice But Without All The Nazis

Setting: My kitchen, twenty minutes ago. Fletch: Do these new gym shorts shorts look okay? Me: (not looking because I'm busy making coffee) They're fine. Fletch: How about the shirt? It's new, too. Me: (pouring, not looking) S'fine. (adding cream and Splenda, then glancing at clock) Hey, it's already 8:30. How are you going to work out and then have enough time to get to your 10:15 facial? Fletch: Shit, is that this morning? And I thought I didn't have to go until 11:15. Are you sure? Me: Yep...

The Stories Behind Some Random Crap I Alluded To On Twitter

While I was on tour, people in each city asked if I was going to do a summer reading list. Since a lot of you seem to want this, I'm happy to oblige and I anticipate posting this by Friday. In the interim, I've got a couple of stories to update. I tried to do most of these on Twitter, but apparently sometimes you need more than 140 characters to best express a thought. So here goes... Maisy's feeling better after her bout with kennel cough and I thank you all for your prayers and nice thought...

Not Forks, But Close

We're one step closer to getting our house. Maybe. We think. The thing is, we want to buy this particular house as much as the owners would like to sell it to us. However, because it's a short sale and because we can't close until July, the process is more convoluted and frustrating than anyone should have to handle without a bottle of Xanax or a pitcher of margaritas. (Or, if you're feeling saucy, both.) We still don't know if their bank's going to let the deal happen, despite all interested...

Putting The "Ass" In "Assistant"

Because I'm now on track to do two books a year instead of one, it made business sense to finally hire an assistant. I'm normally such an I-can-do-it-myself-er that this was a difficult decision to make. I'm not good at asking for help and even worse at letting go of control. And yet for the past few months I've been woefully behind on everything because there are too many moving pieces to manage on my own. Enter my new assistant. He came to me highly recommended and seemingly with the right ...

Flabby

It figures that the minute I finally have time to sit down and write a post, I can't remember what I wanted to say. Perhaps that's a by-product of spending the past four weeks speaking of nothing but myself? Seriously, as much fun as I had going to interviews and doing events this past month, if no one asks me a personal question for a while, that'll be just fine. Also, given my recent schedule, I'm finally starting to believe that singers/starlets might not be faking it when they're treated ...

One More Week (And A Couple Of Links)

I have one more week of crazy book-promotion travel before I get back to business as usual around here. The tour's been incredible and I've had such a great time meeting everyone! That being said, if I could have more than two consecutive days of sleeping in my own bed, I'd enjoy that, too. I have so much to post when I'm finally done, so please stay tuned. Anyway, if you need a quick shot of new material, I'm happy to direct you to my newest column. If you're new to the site, please allow me...

In Terms Of Badassedness...

... this ranks somewhere between a Jack Bauer witness interrogation and a Michael Westen double-plus-explode-y rescue operation, which, for those of you who don't watch 24 or Burn Notice, means pretty far up the whole bad-assed continuum. Anyway, I share a publisher with Dave Barry, who is the funniest writer in America. (This is a fact, not an opinion. Look it up.) The folks at Penguin and Amazon thought a clever way for us to cross-promote our new books would be to interview each other. So ...

It Begins...

Who's ready for the My Fair Lazy tour? Not me, not me! Wait, I mean, me! Me! Seriously, I'm ready. Last week I had to travel to Dallas to give a speech and I considered it kind of a shake-down cruise. That trip allowed me to work out the bugs in regard to what bags I wanted to pack and which clothes would travel well. Traveling a week early reminded me to do stuff like renew my Admirals' Club membership and stock up on 3 ounce bottles and find out if my new shoes are, in fact, crippling, whic...