Evil Editor's Blog, page 320

Summer School Teacher 5

Memo to students, Creative Writing, Summer Session
News: Grisham unavailable. I'm substituting. First day assignment: What do you expect to get out of this course?
Evil Editor.

Dear Teacher,
What this summer is going to be isn't what I wanted it to be but the teacher gave me a failing grade and I have to learn where periods and commas go and all that other stuff this, this summer while my friends are off at water parks and roller coasters and I'm stuck in this stinking classroom trying to write w...

Summer School Teacher 2

I slumped into my seat and stared at the guy in the front of the classroom. Some people are built round; others need to lay off the McDonalds. This guy was a bit of both, with a touch of 19th century fashion thrown into the mix.

"Dude," Shane said, "I thought we had some famous guy for a teacher, not a geezer."

The fat guy turned around and nailed Shane with a chalkboard eraser. I decided, for once in a long while, to keep my smart alecky mouth shut for a while.

"So," I asked, my notebook ready ...

Summer School Teacher 1

EE: Welcome to summer school. I'm Evil Editor, and I'll be running this classroom. You are here either because you're lazy or stupid or punks. Which means your chances of passing this course are nil. As it would be silly of me to waste ten weeks trying to teach you to write--knowing you won't listen to a word I say and will flunk anyway--I propose a deal: I use the class time to clear my slush pile, and you use it to read comic books or pornography and I'll give all of you D's.

Class (speaking...

Saturday Film Series

This film is also available on YouTube where it may be viewed in a larger format.

Face-Lift 782

Guess the Plot

Jesus, Mo and Cheese Puffs

1. Jesus is a Puerto Rican immigrant living in New York. Mo is his neighbor and drinking buddy. Together they have a dream to transform the snack food industry.

2. Mo and his wife Flo pack the car with Cheese Puffs and head for sunny California so Flo can get plastic surgery from a TV doctor. Along the way they meet Angel, a homeless woman who tells them about Jesus. Will Angel renew their faith, or will they give her some Cheese Puffs and tell h...

Cartoon 662

Caption: Stacy

Your caption on the next cartoon! Link in sidebar.

Q & A 180

If a writer uses the exact plot, including the ending, of another published piece, is it plagiarism?


The total number of plots in all of literature has been declared at various times and by various people to be 1, 3, 7, 20, 36 . . .

On that basis, if using one of those plots is plagiarism, everything is plagiarism. Fortunately, that isn't plagiarism.

Now if you copy the text of a novel and then change the main characters' names from Scarlet and Rhett to Chloe and Gus, that's plagiarism. Plagi...

New Beginning 758

Mr. Bimble swiftly strode up the mountain trail in gigantic steps. He swung his walking stick about as if he was a super hero massive in height and long in limb. However, Mr. Bimble was nothing of the sort. To picture Mr. Bimble doing any sort of swift walking just days ago would have been a fantastic feat. For Mr. Bimble was a stout, round fellow with legs low to the ground that bowed out and a belly that confidently swung to and fro when just shuffling along. His arms were so short that oft...

Cartoon 661

Caption: Anon.

Your caption on the next cartoon! Link in sidebar.

Writing Exercise

School's out for summer. Except that the kids who flunked courses have to go to summer school if they want to be promoted. With the Creative Writing teacher, John Grisham, off on a book tour, Evil Editor has agreed to show the ropes to a few losers. Write the scene.

300 words max.
Deadline: Sunday, 10 AM eastern