Evil Editor's Blog, page 311

Private Dick Scene 3

This dame, a real dish with gams up to her melons, sauntered into my office. I recognized her as the canary perched on the piano every Thursday night at the Clover Club, a joint where the giggle juice was like gasoline. I know this because someone siphoned the gas out of my car while I was in the club one night, and I only made it home thanks to a gallon of their hooch. When I got home I needed a nightcap so I siphoned the gas tank. Gas tank was probably thinking, Make up your mind, ass...

Private Dick Scene 2

You never quite get used to the smell of a corpse. Especially when you find it in a men's room stall in a Limburger cheese factory. I could just see tomorrow's headlines: Pecorino Cut from Big Block of Cheddar; Final Words of Cheese Dairy Heir; Murder Blows Chunks of Gouda; and the worst of all, Limburger Out-Stinks Rotting Corpse Crammed in Crapper!

Then inside the article, the reporters would use cute and catchy made up words like food-porn, foods-turbation, food-interuptus, geni-cuisine. Ev...

Private Dick Scene 1

My office was so hot I wished I had a time machine so I could go into the future when air conditioning had been invented. Then she walked in, and the place got cold real fast.

She was all curves and skin as white as a color wheel spinning rapidly. Before I could even drool she said, "Find my husband. The bum melted away in the middle of the night; left me nothing but a stack of I.O.Thems and an empty icebox."

I could see there was fire under that frozen surface, just like Eyjafjallajokull Volca...

Saturday Film Series

Feedback Request

The author of New Beginning 765 has posted a revision in the comments there.

Face-Lift 794

Guess the Plot

Eduardo's Parakeets

1. Eduardo has been with the circus for years; his love of parakeets enables them to perform the most amazing tricks. When his great aunt buys the circus and shuts it down, he runs away with his beloved birds. Also, a street-smart crow.

2. Ever since he discovered that the Aborigine name for parakeet meant 'tasty snack', Eduardo's restaurant was the hottest place in town, with its new French 'mini pigeon' dish. However, the parakeets are going to teach him why ...

Cartoon 686

Caption: Angie

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Success Story

Rachel reports publication of her story "The Voice" here.

The opening appeared on this blog as New Beginning 680 and later as NB 763.

Rachel credits her success to the minions' brilliant feedback.

Face-Lift 793

Guess the Plot

Ancient Magic

1. Some magic is pure energy, other pure art. Then there's pure love, the oldest magic of all, the hardest to master, and . . . do I have to tell you what a heap of cliches this book is?

2. Gwyn has been abducted by the Go'el Kadien, and only the sorceress Arowen can help him master the magic of the Ancients and save the Ryhzan king from a nefarious plot. Also, other names and places created from random letters and apostrophes.

3. JEOPARDY! Betty knows it's in th...

Cartoon 682

Caption: Evil Editor

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