Edward Hoornaert's Blog, page 51

Effing Feline and the door into winter

[image error]

[image error]I, Effing Feline, have gotten interested in tracking down my ancestors. Geneology sites are useless for cats — an intolerable oversight — but I’ve discovered some cats who are worthy of my bloodline.

One such is Pete in The Door Into Summer, by Robert A. Heinlein. Awhile back, Mr Valentine proclaimed this ginger ale-swigging puss the greatest cat in all of science fiction. Clearly, Pete must be related to me.

Today, a snippet from an upcoming (December 4, 2017) science fiction romance by my pet human, Mr Valentine: Rescuing Prince Charming. It picks from where we ended last week, with tech writer Dusty Johnson searching all alone for a bomb saboteurs have planted in the poorly lit guts of Earth’s first starship, which is under construction.

Nothing was neat and tidy down here; in a prototype, speed and ingenuity trumped meticulous design. That meant a lot of places for saboteurs to hide a bomb, but only two where technicians wouldn’t discover it in the course of a workday.

The first hiding place was a niche behind the backup life support nexus. Staring into its shadows, she paused. A heroine wouldn’t hesitate, but an ordinary, everyday woman would think twice about squeezing into a dirty cranny while wearing a new, cream-colored chambray skirt with filigree trim.

Maybe she should just walk away.

Or run.

But there was no one else around to save the ship, and reaching the stars was her dream . . .

Imagining she was watching a movie heroine who’d never had a second thought in her life, Dusty slipped between a girder and the grease-streaked life support housing. When her skirt survived unscathed, she felt an instant’s relief . . . until she spied a cheap plastic lunch kit, tucked almost out of sight.

Effing Feline here again. When the weather got cold and snowy, Heinlein’s Pete went from door to door, hoping that one of them led to summer. That’s incomprehensible! Summer is hot enough to singe my fur. Why isn’t Pete looking for the door into winter?

Mr V, you should totally write a story about an Arizona cat called The Door Into Winter. Do it now. Immediately!

While he’s writing, the rest of you go visit the Weekend Writing Warriors and Snippet Sunday authors. Do it now. Immediately!

[image error]

I now have a back cover blurb for Rescuing Prince Charming. Here goes:

Dusty Johnson, a self-styled ordinary, everyday woman, responds with extraordinary heroism when saboteurs try to bomb the prototype of Earth’s first starship. Although she yearns to return to anonymity, that moment of courage propels her ever deeper into dangers that tear the scabs off her dark secrets—and thrust her into the arms of the unattainable man of her dreams.

Reese Eaglesbrood, an alien prince, yearns to restore his tattered reputation by guiding the starship project to completion, but his fascination with the unassuming heroine threatens to undermine his fragile authority. Shunning Dusty is necessary, yet unthinkable—and when the saboteurs strike again, she is his only ally against Earth’s most elusive enemies.

Rescuing Prince Charming is now available for pre-sale.

SFR Brigade Showcase, November 2017

[image error]

Once a month, the Science Fiction Romance Brigade’s showcase enables the brigade’s authors to highlight snippets from new works, WIPs, cover reveals or other fun things.

This month I want to do two things: 1) crow, and 2) advertise.

Crow

[image error]I attended last month’s InD’Scribe conference, run by InD’Tale Magazine, a good resource for indie and small-press authors. My science fiction romance, Escapee, was a finalist for a RONE award in the science fiction category. I’m happy to report that Escapee was awarded first runner up.

SFR Brigade’s own Hywela Lyn also won at the conference, so be sure to congratulate her!

The award plus Escapee‘s tagline tell you all you need to know: It’s The African Queen in outer space. Escapee translates the beloved movie to a dying moon, recently invaded.

(Below) The author celebrating. Check out those fake abs.

[image error]

Advertise

For various reasons, I haven’t had a book come out in almost a year. The drought is about to end, though. Rescuing Prince Charming is set for release on December 4.

The cover hasn’t yet been revealed, so you’ll have to wait for the non-blackout visuals. But here’s the back cover blurb:

[image error]Dusty Johnson, a self-styled ordinary, everyday woman, responds with extraordinary heroism when saboteurs try to bomb the prototype of Earth’s first starship. Although she yearns to return to anonymity, that moment of courage propels her ever deeper into dangers that tear the scabs off her dark secrets—and thrusts her into the arms of the unattainable man of her dreams.

Reese Eaglesbrood, an alien prince, yearns to restore his tattered reputation by guiding the starship project to completion, but his fascination with the unassuming heroine threatens to undermine his fragile authority. Shunning Dusty is necessary, yet unthinkable—and when the saboteurs strike again, she is his only ally against Earth’s most elusive enemies.

Rescuing Prince Charming is available now for pre-sale, so hurry and order your copy before the Internet runs out of electrons.

Not yet sold? Read chapter one of Rescuing Prince Charming.

A word from our sponsor

Be sure to check out the other great writers in the Science Fiction Romance Brigade’s showcase.

 

Still, Al, Rob & Sergei #mfrwauthor

[image error]

Once again, here’s the Marketing for Romance Writers yearlong blog hop. For  week 42, the writing prompt is:

A Person Who Inspires Me

This topic would’ve been simpler when I was young and more easily inspired, rather than old and cynical. Thinking back, though, it’s easy enough to remember some of my idols.

Albert Einstein

T[image error]hanks to my parents, I always knew that my grey matter was my ticket out of the sometimes dodgy neighborhoods we lived. Who better for such a kid to admire than the greatest brain of the twentieth century?

[image error]

Robert Heinlein

[image error]I discovered Heinlein’s YA science fiction by second or third grade, and guess what? I now write science fiction (and romance). Podkayne of Mars  (shown at left) was a favorite. When I reread it recently, the first half is still wonderful . . . until Heinlein’s outdated social attitudes spoil things.

[image error]

Sergei Prokofiev

[image error]I was into music long before I ever dreamed of being a writer. Although my first discovery in the world of serious music was Beethoven (wow, he had Flemish ancestors just like me!), I soon feel under the spell of the twentieth century’s most popular composer. Sergei’s still my favorite.

[image error]

Ray Still

[image error]I started playing the oboe in high school. Mr Still was the principal oboist of the Chicago Symphony Orchestra and the most admired oboist of his day. Before going to an oboe lesson, I would listen to the CSO’s recording of Schubert’s Unfinished Symphony, which opens with his unmatched performance of the oboe solo.

Years later, I was privileged to take a master class (i.e., a lesson with an audience) with Mr Still when he came to Victoria. I was so intimidated at first that I froze and couldn’t play. Oh, the humiliation!

[image error]

What about you?

Who has inspired you? Be sure to check out the other writers taking part in this blog hop.

Rescuing Prince Charming 1 #MFRWHooks

[image error]

Welcome to the Marketing for Romance Writers blog hop, Book Hooks. Writers share a short snippet of their works to entice you.

I’m highlighting Rescuing Prince Charming, a science fiction romance that will be released December 4. Here’s the book’s back cover blurb. It’s still raw, so if you have any suggestions, please fire away.

Dusty Johnson, a self-styled ordinary, everyday woman, responds with extraordinary heroism when saboteurs try to bomb the prototype of Earth’s first starship. Although she yearns to return to anonymity, her moment of courage propels her ever deeper into dangers that tear the scabs off her dark past—and thrusts her into the arms of the unattainable man of her dreams.

Reese Eaglesbrood, an alien prince, yearns to restore his tattered reputation by guiding the starship project to completion, but his fascination with the unassuming heroine threatens to undermine his fragile authority. Shunning Dusty is necessary, yet unthinkable—and when the saboteurs strike again, she is his only ally against Earth’s most elusive enemies.

What do you think? Would this blurb hook you?

Powered by Linky Tools Click here to enter your link and view this Linky Tools list…
Or pre-order Rescuing Prince Charming.

 

 

Effing Feline is here. Or not.

[image error]

I, Effing Feline, haven’t managed to track down any of my sisters yet, but I’ve discovered some cats who are worthy of being related to me. For example, here is science’s most famous feline and a worthy relative for me, a cat who has a science fiction writer for a pet: Shrodinger’s Cat:

[image error]

Schrodinger’s famous Cat

Oops! She’s not here!   (*See pawnote)

Today, a snippet from an upcoming (December 4, 2017) science fiction romance by my pet human, Mr Valentine: Rescuing Prince Charming. I’m hissed at him for making me introduce this stupid book AGAIN.

You see, he’s been working on the dumb thing on and off since 2015. Do you know how long that is in cat years? No book has ever given him this much trouble, but its third incarnation is FINALLY good enough to be published.

Yeah yeah, sure. We’ll see about that.  But does he think of me? About how hard it is choose fresh, exciting snippets when I’ve done so twice before, back when it was a WIP in smelly diapers?

Hiss, snarl! I don’t think — though how can I be sure? — that I’ve shared the stupid opening of the dumb book, which is now available for pre-order.

Time: Four years from tomorrow.

Place: A top-secret, underground facility on a Pacific Northwest island that doesn’t exist . . . yet.

 – – – –

Dusty Johnson really didn’t want to do this.

She took a deep breath, trying without success to dispel the dread clogging her belly. Some women daydreamed of rescuing princes from dragons. Not her.

Yet here she was, all alone, creeping through the dark guts of the half-built starship, searching for a time bomb about to explode. If the siren ordering evacuation of the research facility had summoned the expected herd of guards, she would’ve offered advice then fled with the rest of the staff. Having come this far, though, she couldn’t leave without branding herself a coward in her own eyes.

And so she dodged through shadowy machinery that smelled of oil and ozone.

Effing Feline here again. Mrs V scolded me for calling Rescuing Prince Charming dumb and stupid. She says it’s her favorite of the many books Mr V has written. (He forces her to read them all. What a sadist.) She smells so nice and she has the world’s greatest lap, so I agreed to take back what I said.

Here’s my apology. Rescuing Prince Charmning isn’t dumb and stupid. It’s dupid, instead. Or maybe stumb.

While a laughing Mrs V chases me around the room, be sure to visit the other Weekend Writing Warriors and Snippet Sunday authors. And now, I gotta run!

* Pawnote: If you aren’t familiar with Schrodinger’s Cat, click for an explanation. And below is a cartoon.

[image error]

Dead goldfish and tailless dog #mfrwauthor

[image error]

Once again, here’s the Marketing for Romance Writers yearlong blog hop. For  week 41, the writing prompt is:

Meet my pets

I didn’t have pets when I was growing up, because we were always moving. Boo hoo. Don’t  you feel sorry for me?

Actually, I  had a goldfish once. It died.

And a cat for a year or less. It’s name was Cat. It used the bathtub as a litter box, so one day mom left a half-inch of water to keep Cat away. Apparently she didn’t look before she leaped, because we suddenly heard a cat fight from the bathroom as poor Cat splashed around in her panic to escape. When she emerged, she was soaked from ears to tail.

[image error]

My wife, way back when

At age twenty-five, I got my first real pet: Lion. We used to take her for long walks along the river, and she never  had to be trained to stay with us. A neighbor had a St Bernard who played with Lion and one day they were standing side by side on the porch. The St Bernard wagged its tail and knocked poor Lion right off the porch.

When we moved from British Columbia to Arizona, we drove the 2200 mile trip with four kids aged 5 to 11 — and my eldest son’s cat, Priscilla. (Don’t ask me how Judi and I survived that trip, but we did.) Priscilla was male. At rest stops, Scott put a leash on him to walk the poor cat, who slunk around fearfully, an inch above the ground.

More cats followed in an orgy of petdom, including Katie, Whiskers, and Willy, up to three at a time. I love petting cats, love hearing them purr. Unfortunately, I developed allergies. Sigh.

There were more dogs, too, though only one at a time: Sable (an ill-behaved, 95-pound brute), Asta (a saintly Schnauzer), and Laddie (an opinionated Maltese). Laddie distrusted men, including me. After a few years he deigned to let me walk him, and he had this weird trait: he loved curbs. Not to pee on, to walk on. He thought they were Laddie-sized sidewalks. If a curb was anywhere in sight, you could count on him to trot along it.

[image error]My current pet is Twiggles. Effing Feline, the virtual cat I’m not allergic to, dislikes Twiggles, maybe because she’s a dog or maybe because she’s real and he isn’t. Wiggles has no tail, and we have no idea why, because she’s a rescue dog. Her whole rear end ‘twiggles’ when she tries to wag. She loves my grandsons, too. Well, actually she mostly ignores them.

What about you?

What’s special about your pets? Tell us about it in a comment. And be sure to check out the other writers taking part in this blog hop.

Effing Feline seeks his roots

[image error]

I, Effing Feline, haven’t managed to track down any of my sisters yet (click here for the background), but I’ve discovered some cats who surely must be related to me. Today I’ll show you the first of my famous relatives.

[image error]

Joan of Arcat, aka La Puss Cat d’Orléans.

Joan of Arcat is one of the most famous European cats. She’s considered a heroine of France because she led felines in a heroic defeat of English Bulldogs in the fifteen century. She’s called the Maid of Orleans, which in French is La Pucelle d’Orléans. Clearly the word ‘pucelle’ refers to a puss cat, right? And such a heroic purrsonage is  worthy only of my lineage.

And now the very last snippet from  Ed’s sci fi romance,         Escapee, featuring the most lovable of ugly pets, the skoot. Having survived the battle that liberated her moon, Catt (I still love that name) ends up on a hospital spaceship.

The skoot put its forepaws on the edge of the mattress and licked her wrist.

“We can come back in a little while, though, if you don’t feel up to visitors.” Hank’s forehead wrinkled in worry as he peered down at her.

That expression, aimed at her, brought her the rest of the way back to life, but talking was hard. “Water?”

“Here you go.” He held a cup to her lips as she sipped. “I thought I’d lost you when the tank was hit — I did lose you, actually, until the skoot led me to you, but you’re alive, alive.” He kissed her lips, a butterfly’s touch that told her better than any words she was, indeed, alive. “That’s a promise for later, okay?” he whispered.

Effing Feline here again. I mentioned last week that Ed, my pet human, was at a conference sponsored by InD’tale Magazine. This novel, Escapee, was declared the first runner-up in the science fiction CATegory.

Purrty please, join me in laughing at this picture of Ed dressed as Mr Valentine for the conference’s book signing. Look at those rubber abs (chuckle, snort).

[image error]

Ridiculous, eh? Be sure to visit the other Weekend Writing Warriors and Snippet Sunday authors.

[image error]

Escapee

The African Queen in Outer Space


[image error]

Edward Hoornaert’s romantic space opera, Escapee, continues the saga of the Dukelsky family (begun in The Guardian Angel of Farflung Station). If you like The African Queen and the thrill of underdogs finding love while battling a hostile world, you’ll love Escapee.

Amazon US  |  Canada  |  UK  |  Australia
MuseItUp Publishing
Apple iBooks
Barnes and Noble
Kobo Books

.

 

 

Call me a Prairie Vole #mfrwauthor

[image error]

Once again, here’s the Marketing for Romance Writers blog hop. For  week 41, the writing prompt is:

My First Love

Scientists have found that some prairie voles are genetically programmed to be monogamous. They’ve even located the gene that controls this.

[image error]

Lovey dovey voles

Researchers at The University of Texas at Austin have found that natural selection drives some male prairie voles to be fully monogamous and others to seek more partners. The surprising contrasts in the animals’ brains result from differences in their DNA.

If (and I stress the iffiness) there’s a ‘fidelity gene’ in humans, that would explain a lot, wouldn’t it? In fact, it could make a good science fiction romance.

Hmm (wheels turning).

[image error]Anyway, if there’s such a gene in human, I have it. And it seems to affect not just relations with my beloved wife, but my loyalty to other things, as well. Cases in point:

While home sick with pertussis at age 8, I watched baseball games because nothing else was on TV. I became a fan of the Chicago White Sox merely because I saw them play. Eons later, I’m still a Sox fan, even though they’re horrible.

[image error]When Vancouver, where I lived at the time, was awarded an expansion team, hockey fever struck the city. I caught the fever (not pertussis this time). Although we moved from Vancouver before the Canucks played a single game, I’m still a Vancouver Canucks fan nearly fifty years later, even though they’re horrible.

[image error]I wanted to transfer belatedly into high school band class, but the only way the conductor would let me in was if I took up the oboe. I did — and discovered I had a knack for it. I played several other instruments in school, but fifty years later, the only one I’m still playing is the oboe, even though I’m horrible.

I started dating Judi in high school and was instantly smitten. I suppose you could call it love at first sight, but to be totally honest, it felt more like lust at first sight. I married her a week after graduation and I’m still married 48 years later, even though she’s . . .

(Do you really expect me to say “horrible”?)

Wonderful.

[image error]

Un-retouched photo of the author

What about you?

There are many kinds of love: books, people, food, places, etc. It’ll be interesting to see what kinds of first love other writers taking part in this blog hop chose to write about.

Shameless self-promotion

[image error]As some of you know, my science fiction romance, Escapee, was a finalist for the RONE award. At the lavish award ceremony, Escapee didn’t win — but it was the first runner up. Hey, it’s better than a kick in the rear.

I also got a picture of Mr Valentine (my marketing gimmick) with this blog hop’s very own Alina Field. She’s the one on the right.

[image error]

Several women at the conference weren’t shy about fondling my rubber ‘six-pack abs.’ Weird.
Escapee — The African Queen in Outer Space

[image error]

My romantic space opera, Escapee, continues the saga of the Dukelsky family (begun in The Guardian Angel of Farflung Station). If you like The African Queen and the thrill of underdogs finding love while battling a hostile world, you’ll love Escapee.

Amazon US  |  Canada  |  UK  |  Australia
MuseItUp Publishing
Apple iBooks
Barnes and Noble

Photos of voles courtesy Science Daily.

Effing Feline is a pig

[image error]

I, Effing Feline, have the house to myself for the day. You see, Mr V’s off lollygagging at a writer’s conference. I’m left with one of those feeders that dispense as much cat food as I can eat. I consider it a challenge. Can I finish the entire container of food before he returns?

Watch me try! Burp.

Since he’s not here to make me write a cute intro, I’m going to go directly into the penultimate snippet from  Ed’s sci fi romance, Escapee, featuring the most lovable of ugly pets, the skoot.

Skipping waaay ahead (since he isn’t here to object) Catt and Hank reach their objective: enemy headquarters and attack it just as the good guys are launching at attack from the air. The good guys win, but Catt is separated from Hank, injured, and taken to a hospital ship orbiting Banff. (FYI, Lance was her android copilot.)

Catt’s meager stores of energy ran dry. She sank back into a drugged sleep and dreamed of Hank. Of Lance, dear Lance, and then Hank some more. The stupid, lovable skoot shuffled through dreams, too. But mostly she dreamed of Hank.

Feeling better after resting, she opened her eyes . . .but kept dreaming. Must be dreaming, because she heard the unmistakable click of the skoot’s nails on the floor — and it had to be her skoot, because it limped in a five-legged rhythm. Catt tried to sit up. Moved a good ten centimeters up this time. That was progress.

“Whoa, there,” a voice said, “take it easy.”

“Hank!”

Effing Feline here again, but just for a minute. Gotta go find a shoe to barf in so I can eat more food.

Be sure to visit the other Weekend Writing Warriors and Snippet Sunday authors.

[image error]

Escapee

The African Queen in Outer Space


[image error]

Edward Hoornaert’s romantic space opera, Escapee, continues the saga of the Dukelsky family (begun in The Guardian Angel of Farflung Station). If you like The African Queen and the thrill of underdogs finding love while battling a hostile world, you’ll love Escapee.

Amazon US  |  Canada  |  UK  |  Australia
MuseItUp Publishing
Apple iBooks
Barnes and Noble
Kobo Books

.

 

 

Indescribable! #mfrwauthor

[image error]

Once again, here’s the Marketing for Romance Writers blog hop. For  week 41, the writing prompt is:

My Blogging Inspiration

This topic leaves me scratching my head, uncertain what is meant. But hey, it’s not a school essay assignment, so I’m just going to write about any darned thing that happens to inspire me to blog. I can think of three things off the top of my head.

#1 – My books

As in, ‘wanting to sell them.’ Social media are de rigueur for writers these days, which is the only reason I started a blog. Rather to my surprise, though, I enjoy the writing and especially the people I’ve met online.

#2 – My virtual cat

One of the main reasons I enjoy blogging is that every Sunday I turn the blog over to Effing Feline. His full name is Fart-Fueled Flying Feline, and he hosts my Weekend Writing Warrior bog hop posts.

[image error]

Effing is my irascible, misanthropic alter ego — and he’s more popular than I am. Does that mean I should stop trying to be a nice guy? Anyway, here’s a sample of his work.

If you want to put your name out to a different audience and get to know more writers of all genres, here’s an open invitation to join the Weekend Writing Warriors blog hop. All it takes is 8 to 10 sentences from a WIP or finished work.

#3 – My weekend
[image error]

My Escapee is a finalist for the RONE contest, awarded this Saturday.

I’m currently in Burbank, California at the InD’Scribe conference for readers and writers. So far, it’s fun. There was a ‘medieval ball’ this evening, which basically meant wear any costume you like. I was disguised as an author of science fiction romance; I put a lot of thought into that costume.

This blog hop’s Alina Fields will be at the conference as well, selling books on Saturday. I’ll see if I can get a picture of the two of us together.

What about you?

What’s your inspiration for blogging? Check out the things that inspire other writers taking part in this blog hop.

Shameless self-promotion

Escapee

The African Queen in Outer Space

[image error]

Edward Hoornaert’s romantic space opera, Escapee, continues the saga of the Dukelsky family (begun in The Guardian Angel of Farflung Station). If you like The African Queen and the thrill of underdogs finding love while battling a hostile world, you’ll love Escapee.

Amazon US  |  Canada  |  UK  |  Australia
MuseItUp Publishing
Apple iBooks
Barnes and Noble