Red-Headed Stepchild Quotes

“I walked to the door where Clovis waited. When I looked up, he was staring at Adam. A quick glance backward confirmed Adam was returning his stare. Freaking males, I thought, they couldn’t be more obvious about their territorial dispute if they’d both peed on me.”
― Jaye Wells, Red-Headed Stepchild

“Sure. What's the worst that could happen."
Twenty minutes later, we had our answer. "I can't frecking believe this."
I cringed. "I'm so sorry."
"I'm bald!" Giguhl continued. "I look like a freak."
"It's not that bad," I said. But it was. Oh, my lord was it bad. I'd never seen an uglier cat in my entire life.”
― Jaye Wells, Red-Headed Stepchild

“By now, I should have learned that luck, if she was a lady, was a mean-spirited bitch with a grudge against me.”
― Jaye Wells, Red-Headed Stepchild

“Is that all you bought?” His eyes shot to the left. “Um.” I clenched my teeth. “What else?” “A Super Mega Juicer,” he said quickly. “But, Sabina, seriously that juicer is a miracle machine.” “I’m a vampire, Giguhl. The only liquids I drink are blood and alcohol. I don’t do juice.”
― Jaye Wells, Red-Headed Stepchild

“What up, peeps?"
I looked at my hairless cat for a moment. "What up, peeps? You've been watching MTV again, haven't you?"
"Word.”
― Jaye Wells, Red-Headed Stepchild

“Got it. Look for a room with a sign with a big arrow that says, ‘Kidnapped Mancies Here,’ ” he said.”
― Jaye Wells, Red-Headed Stepchild

“My eyes bulged out of my head as I saw what rested between his hips. “Good Lord!” I said without thinking. A forked penis will do that to a girl. He glanced down at the appendage and smiled knowingly. “Once you go demon you never go back.”
― Jaye Wells, Red-Headed Stepchild

“We passed by a few workers, who did double takes as we ran past. I supposed that the image of a hairless cat in a sweater being followed by a stressed-looking chick in stiletto boots could have been funny. I was too anxious to get the hell out of there to see any humor in it.”
― Jaye Wells, Red-Headed Stepchild

“Spare me the self-righteous indignation. I highly doubt your motives are selfless.”
― Jaye Wells, Red-Headed Stepchild

“Sabina." Vinca said interrupting my maudlin thoughts.
"Hmmm..."
She rolled her eyes. "I said, don't you think Adam looks nice tonight."
I shook myself. "I guess so," I said with a shrug.
"Oh, stop," he said. "You're going to make me blush.”
― Jaye Wells, Red-Headed Stepchild

“What are you doing here?” a deep voice demanded. My heart burst into a rapid staccato as I swung around, ready to defend myself. Only instead of a guard or employee, Giguhl sat a few feet away laughing at me.
“Dammit, you scared the crap out of me.”
He laughed, a spooky noise coming from an even spookier-looking cat. “You should have seen your face.”
― Jaye Wells, Red-Headed Stepchild

“Where'd you send her?"
"Siberia. Lovely this time of year. A bit remote, I'm afraid. Might take her weeks to find a town and even longer to arrange transportation back to the States."

My lips quirked. I didn't feel like laughing, but the image of my half-millenium-old grandmother trudging through snow was kind of funny. "You're sick, you know that?"

"What can I day? I thought a cold-hearted bitch like her would feel at home in the tundra.”
― Jaye Wells, Red-Headed Stepchild

“Must not kill the demon cat. Must not kill the demon cat.”
― Jaye Wells, Red-Headed Stepchild

“The point isn't knowing what will happen, it's being aware that everything we do affects the whole. All of us - mages, vampires, humans, and the rest - affect the balance of life."

"If you start singing 'Kum Ba Yah' I'm out of here.”
― Jaye Wells, Red-Headed Stepchild

“Don't go getting all Oprah on me now, demon.”
― Jaye Wells, Red-Headed Stepchild

“We need more than that. They're got security all over the place."
"I can probably get some faeries involved," Vinca offered.

Frank snorted. "What are you going to do, blow pollen on them?”
― Jaye Wells, Red-Headed Stepchild

“I guess you don't get to watch much TV in Irkalla."

He propped his head on one scaly bicep and turned to look at me. "Nah. We stayed busy torturing the souls of the damned and playing hide the hot poker. You know, the usual.”
― Jaye Wells, Red-Headed Stepchild

“Ewan played it cool, looking back at Sebastian. "Are their names on the list?"
Sebastian didn't miss a beat. "No sir."

"But he isn't holding a list," the girl whined.

(...) "Is my name of the list?" I teased Sebastian.
"What list?" he said, deadpan. "Go on back?”
― Jaye Wells, Red-Headed Stepchild

“She lifted an eyebrow. "Hmm, I wonder why? Wouldn't have to do with a certain sexy hexy, would it?"

"If you mean the annoying asshole who was here earlier, yes."

Vinca and Giguhl traded a glance and then looked at me. "Please," Gighul said. "You're so hot for that mancy you're about to spontaneously combust.”
― Jaye Wells, Red-Headed Stepchild

“You want me to assassinate him."
"No, my dear, we want you to infiltrate his organisation, find out his plans, root out his spies, and then kill him.”
― Jaye Wells, Red-Headed Stepchild

“His eyes burned with intensity. I wondered briefly if someone
he knew was being held in that cold room that smelled like death. Someone he loved?”
― Jaye Wells, Red-Headed Stepchild

“The last thing I needed was a nymph with sunshine coming out of her ass tagging along with me.”
― Jaye Wells, Red-Headed Stepchild

“shit, I thought. This guy sounded like some freaky mortal televangelist.”
― Jaye Wells, Red-Headed Stepchild