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Batter My Heart Batter My Heart by Nenia Campbell
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“There was something devastating about being handled gently by a cruel man. Maybe because it felt so intentional, so excruciatingly deliberate.”
Nenia Campbell, Batter My Heart
“This house bleeds memories," he whispered, with his fingers stroking down her cheek, her neck. "There's no fucking escaping it. It's all rotten and gone to shit and I can feel it dying all around me." She felt his sharp nose brush against her scalp, through her hair. "If you're not careful, I'll drag you down with me.”
Nenia Campbell, Batter My Heart
“Bipolar disorder was like that: a wild party that was constantly on the verge of ending, chaos and bright lights, an exaltation of the senses. That was mania. But all parties had their end, and when the shadows were long and the glitter had lost its sparkle and gathered to mingle with the dust on the unclean floors and all the food lost its flavor and the music finally died—that was depression, lurking in between all of the dark spaces of the noise and the laughter, as unavoidable as death or darkness.”
Nenia Campbell, Batter My Heart
“Crying just makes me want to fuck you harder.”
Nenia Campbell, Batter My Heart
“It's hard to give up something once you've already decided it's yours. It's like picking up a rock at the beach and seeing it in the light for the first time. Maybe at first, it looks dull and flat. But then you notice that spark, that flare of color. And now that it's in your hand, blazing with fire, you can't bring yourself to throw it away because you're not sure you'll be able to find it again if you lost it. Or if it'll even be the same.”
Nenia Campbell, Batter My Heart
“The heroes without hope of redemption are the ones we root hardest for because in our own unshakable faith in romance, we cannot fathom a heart so deep or dark that it cannot be turned.”
Nenia Campbell, Batter My Heart
“There were rules for victimhood, it seemed, the way that there were rules for everything else, and people really only believed in justice for the privileged, white, and pretty.”
Nenia Campbell, Batter My Heart
“It still felt wrong sometimes. Like something she shouldn't want. But other times she'd catch herself looking at the marks he'd left on her skin, pressing them just to feel the shallow echoes of his touch, and something would catch in her throat and in those moments she could almost understand. The lines had been blurred and redrawn so many times that she was sometimes no longer sure where they were until they were wrapped around her throat.”
Nenia Campbell, Batter My Heart
tags: dahlia
“Je veux saigner pour toi, mais tu es si grand et j'ai si peur.”
Nenia Campbell, Batter My Heart