Getting More Quotes

“Think about meeting your goals, not about wining over someone else”
― Stuart Diamond, Getting More: How You Can Negotiate to Succeed in Work & Life

“If you make friends with the other party, they will look for ways to help you meet your goals.”
― Stuart Diamond, Getting More: How You Can Negotiate to Succeed in Work & Life

“Never make yourself the issue. Just because the other side is a jerk doesn't mean you should be a jerk.”
― Stuart Diamond, Getting More: How You Can Negotiate to Succeed in Work & Life

“The next time a police officer stops you for a traffic infraction, apologize and thank the officer for doing his or her job. You are valuing their judgment in stopping you. You are valuing the time they have spent building a career. And when you value other people, they give you stuff.”
― Stuart Diamond, Getting More: How You Can Negotiate to Succeed in Work and Life

“First, here it is: THE GETTING MORE MODEL (aka the Four Quadrant Negotiation Model) Quadrant I—Problems & Goals 1. Goals: short/long term. 2. Problem(s): in reaching your goals. 3. Parties: List. Decision-maker. Counterpart. Third parties. 4. What if no deal? Worst case? 5. Preparation: Time, relative preparation. Who has more information?”
― Stuart Diamond, Getting More: How You Can Negotiate to Succeed in Work and Life

“Common enemies bring parties closer together and make the negotiation easier. That’s why people complain about the weather;”
― Stuart Diamond, Getting More: How You Can Negotiate to Succeed in Work and Life

“I’m not trying to hit home runs in negotiations. I’m trying to get one extra hit every nine games. It’s a good lesson for negotiation, and a good lesson for life. A few incremental improvements and you will be fabulously more successful.”
― Stuart Diamond, Getting More: How You Can Negotiate to Succeed in Work and Life

“When the other party realizes you care about their feelings, they will listen more, making them more persuadable.”
― Stuart Diamond, Getting More: How You Can Negotiate to Succeed in Work and Life

“How good is email as a communication device? “Terrible,” most people say. One reason is that email has no tone. It’s sort of like tofu—it takes on the flavor of what the recipient is feeling at the moment.”
― Stuart Diamond, Getting More: How You Can Negotiate to Succeed in Work and Life

“As in all negotiations, using third parties can help. But this cannot be perceived as manipulative in any way, or you risk hurting the relationship.”
― Stuart Diamond, Getting More: How You Can Negotiate to Succeed in Work and Life

“Someone who is different is someone with whom you will often disagree. Too many groups I have seen pick someone whose physical attributes might be different, and then pride themselves at having “diversity.” But unless their perceptions are different, then they are really the same,”
― Stuart Diamond, Getting More: How You Can Negotiate to Succeed in Work and Life

“Studies done with both children and adults over the past fifty years show that blaming people reduces performance and motivation.”
― Stuart Diamond, Getting More: How You Can Negotiate to Succeed in Work and Life

“Talking is a sign of strength. Not talking is a sign of weakness.”
― Stuart Diamond, Getting More: How You Can Negotiate to Succeed in Work and Life

“這是很重要的一點。除非我們做的事有助達成目標，否則不該追求「雙贏」或建立「關係」或尋求對方的同意。「雙贏」是個陳腔濫調，聽起來有點操弄意味，每次有人對我說「我們來追求雙贏吧」，我總覺得「他們想從我這裡得到東西」。”
― Stuart Diamond, 華頓商學院最受歡迎的談判課：上完這堂課，世界都會聽你的

“（十三）把焦點放在你能掌控的事上；（十四）避免爭論誰對誰錯。”
― Stuart Diamond, 華頓商學院最受歡迎的談判課：上完這堂課，世界都會聽你的

“有效溝通的根本要件是：（一）持續溝通；（二）傾聽和提問；（三）重視對方，別怪罪對方；（四）常做歸納和摘要；（五）進行角色對調的練習；（六）保持冷靜；（七）闡明目標；（八）堅定立場但不破壞關係；（九）尋找微小的訊號；（十）討論知覺印象的差異；（十一）了解對方如何給承諾；（十二）決定之前，先諮詢；”
― Stuart Diamond, 華頓商學院最受歡迎的談判課：上完這堂課，世界都會聽你的

“◎如果對方知道的資訊比你多出許多，你就是居於弱勢。你應該採取循序漸進的方式，在取得更多的資訊或信任以前，不要承諾。”
― Stuart Diamond, 華頓商學院最受歡迎的談判課：上完這堂課，世界都會聽你的

“Within each public issue, the clearest division is between moderates and extremists. As such, the right third parties in a negotiation are moderates. They, more than extremists, are focused on building a better way of life (tomorrow), whereas most extremists are focused on tearing things down as a penalty for yesterday.”
― Stuart Diamond, Getting More: How to Negotiate to Achieve Your Goals in the Real World

“The way to repair most relationships, before things fester, is to be more direct, offer the other person emotional payments, ask more questions, listen first, and consider the feelings and sensibilities of the other person.”
― Stuart Diamond, Getting More: How You Can Negotiate to Succeed in Work and Life

“Brits and Swedes, for example, are culturally less emotive than Brazilians and Italians, but that doesn’t mean any individual in those cultures is less or more emotional.”
― Stuart Diamond, Getting More: How You Can Negotiate to Succeed in Work and Life

“If you can’t write your idea on the back of my business card, you don’t have a clear idea of what you want to say.”
― Stuart Diamond, Getting More: How You Can Negotiate to Succeed in Work and Life

“We are trying incrementally to move people in a direction where the cost is less, the risk is less, and the ethical insult is minimal. We are not going to change thousands of years of human nature or cultural norms overnight. In the real world—where you and I live—any improvement is a plus.”
― Stuart Diamond, Getting More: How You Can Negotiate to Succeed in Work and Life

“We all think that everyone else has the same thought processes, set of experiences, and perceptual framework that we do.”
― Stuart Diamond, Getting More: How You Can Negotiate to Succeed in Work and Life

“The more aggressive you are, the more you try to meet your own goals at the expense of others’—and you will get less in a negotiation. That’s because other people sense that you don’t care about them. “Tough” people fall into this category. If you fight every battle, you fit this profile. Back off a bit:”
― Stuart Diamond, Getting More: How You Can Negotiate to Succeed in Work and Life

“Some people are better in a crisis than others. Some people love pressure; others hate it, or freeze in the face of it. Some people’s first reaction is to accommodate others. Some people run from conflict; some run toward it.”
― Stuart Diamond, Getting More: How You Can Negotiate to Succeed in Work and Life

“You’re a great teacher,” in my view, is just a throwaway line. “In what way?” I want to know. “What specifically did you learn that’s valuable?” I want to see if they are just jockeying for position (or a good grade). Are they trying to manipulate me, or sincerely expressing appreciation?”
― Stuart Diamond, Getting More: How You Can Negotiate to Succeed in Work and Life

“A simple apology? An elaborate apology? No apology, but flowers? In other words, emotional payments are very specific to the person and the situation.”
― Stuart Diamond, Getting More: How You Can Negotiate to Succeed in Work and Life

“In the six years that we dealt with them, they never broke any term of the agreement. Did I trust them? I didn’t even know them! So here is a key. In the absence of trust, you need a mechanical substitute to give them an incentive not to cheat. It can be a monetary structure as above. It can be money in escrow or potential negative opinions by third parties. It can be the net present value of future profits from the deal.”
― Stuart Diamond, Getting More: How You Can Negotiate to Succeed in Work and Life

“when parties collaborate, the overall size of the pie almost always expands, so each party gets more than it could get alone.”
― Stuart Diamond, Getting More: How You Can Negotiate to Succeed in Work and Life

“they called you a jerk. Maybe it’s not about you. Maybe they’re having a bad day. Maybe they’re having a bad life. Try commiserating; they will often be grateful and work with you. But the key is, YOU can control your own emotions.”
― Stuart Diamond, Getting More: How You Can Negotiate to Succeed in Work and Life