Jayson’s Reviews > Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire > Status Update
Jayson
is 58% done

Notes:
(1) "The Weird Sisters ... were all extremely hairy and dressed in black robes that had been artfully ripped and torn."
- Nice bit of historical accuracy there. 1994 was the very height of "artfully ripped and torn" clothes.
(2) Ron insists Krum only asked Hermione to the Ball to get info on Harry. Jealousy aside, that's actually a legit concern.
— Apr 14, 2020 12:20AM

Notes:
(1) "The Weird Sisters ... were all extremely hairy and dressed in black robes that had been artfully ripped and torn."
- Nice bit of historical accuracy there. 1994 was the very height of "artfully ripped and torn" clothes.
(2) Ron insists Krum only asked Hermione to the Ball to get info on Harry. Jealousy aside, that's actually a legit concern.
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Jayson’s Previous Updates
Jayson
is 98% done

Notes:
(1) For someone who doesn't think much of muggles, Fudge sure loves to wear their clothes.
(2) "Sirius Black!" [Mrs. Weasley] shrieked, pointing at him.
"Mum, shut up!" Ron yelled. "It’s okay!"'
- Often a good "shut up" is the quickest remedy for hysteria.
(3) Dumbledore forces Sirius and Snape to shake hands. Ever the teacher, ever the students.
— May 02, 2020 12:10AM

Notes:
(1) For someone who doesn't think much of muggles, Fudge sure loves to wear their clothes.
(2) "Sirius Black!" [Mrs. Weasley] shrieked, pointing at him.
"Mum, shut up!" Ron yelled. "It’s okay!"'
- Often a good "shut up" is the quickest remedy for hysteria.
(3) Dumbledore forces Sirius and Snape to shake hands. Ever the teacher, ever the students.
Jayson
is 96% done

Notes:
(1) Fawkes uses his tears to speed up Harry's wounds healing. That's handy... sort of like wizard Polysporin.
(2) Now that Fleur likes Ron and pays him attention, I guess she's not hot no more. Not surprising. (see gif)
- Alternatively, once kissed, perhaps her veela powers wore off.
- Alternatively, perhaps Ron's shifted his attention elsewhere.
— May 01, 2020 12:45AM

Notes:
(1) Fawkes uses his tears to speed up Harry's wounds healing. That's handy... sort of like wizard Polysporin.
(2) Now that Fleur likes Ron and pays him attention, I guess she's not hot no more. Not surprising. (see gif)
- Alternatively, once kissed, perhaps her veela powers wore off.
- Alternatively, perhaps Ron's shifted his attention elsewhere.
Jayson
is 91% done

Notes:
(1) Harry's first clue should have been that Crouch always called Voldemort "The Dark Lord." All upright wizards use "He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named." The boldest just say Voldemort.
(2) Wonder if all the lip licking meant David Tennant needed ChapStick on standby?
(3) Karkaroff fled? Who's going to sail the ship back to Durmstrang? Magic, most likely.
— Apr 30, 2020 01:00AM

Notes:
(1) Harry's first clue should have been that Crouch always called Voldemort "The Dark Lord." All upright wizards use "He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named." The boldest just say Voldemort.
(2) Wonder if all the lip licking meant David Tennant needed ChapStick on standby?
(3) Karkaroff fled? Who's going to sail the ship back to Durmstrang? Magic, most likely.
Jayson
is 89% done

Notes:
(1) Not the most impressive group of Death Eaters here. A bunch of no-names, Buckbeak's would-be executioner and some Slytherin dads.
(2) Wormtail speaks rat. Apparently being animagus gives you the ability to speak to animals. I guess McGonagall speaks cat.
(3) Voldemort gives a traditional villain tell-all monologue. A tad cliché if you ask me.
— Apr 29, 2020 12:15AM

Notes:
(1) Not the most impressive group of Death Eaters here. A bunch of no-names, Buckbeak's would-be executioner and some Slytherin dads.
(2) Wormtail speaks rat. Apparently being animagus gives you the ability to speak to animals. I guess McGonagall speaks cat.
(3) Voldemort gives a traditional villain tell-all monologue. A tad cliché if you ask me.
Jayson
is 87% done

Notes:
(1) '"Stop being noble," said Harry irritably. "Just take it, then we can get out of here."'
- Yeah, Cedric, stop being noble! Wait... no! Be noble! Take a dive!
(2) First student death, and the series is never the same again.
(3) Baby Voldemort is no Baby Yoda.
(4) Color-changing tattoos would be a goldmine!
(5) "Lord Voldemort had risen again."
— Apr 28, 2020 12:10AM

Notes:
(1) '"Stop being noble," said Harry irritably. "Just take it, then we can get out of here."'
- Yeah, Cedric, stop being noble! Wait... no! Be noble! Take a dive!
(2) First student death, and the series is never the same again.
(3) Baby Voldemort is no Baby Yoda.
(4) Color-changing tattoos would be a goldmine!
(5) "Lord Voldemort had risen again."
Jayson
is 85% done

Notes:
(1) Harry: "Mrs. Weasley, you didn’t believe that rubbish Rita Skeeter wrote in Witch Weekly, did you? Because Hermione’s not my girlfriend."
Molly: "Oh! ... No — of course I didn’t!"
Narrator: "But she became considerably warmer toward Hermione after that."
(2) In North America we say "uh" not "er." The sphinx's password's "spiduh" to us.
— Apr 27, 2020 12:35AM

Notes:
(1) Harry: "Mrs. Weasley, you didn’t believe that rubbish Rita Skeeter wrote in Witch Weekly, did you? Because Hermione’s not my girlfriend."
Molly: "Oh! ... No — of course I didn’t!"
Narrator: "But she became considerably warmer toward Hermione after that."
(2) In North America we say "uh" not "er." The sphinx's password's "spiduh" to us.
Jayson
is 83% done

Notes:
(1) Continuity error. This is set in 1994, the Macarena (see gif) wasn't a thing until 1996.
- The male cheerleader on the right's creeping me out.
(2) "Fleur ... was eyeing Bill with great interest over her mother’s shoulder. Harry could tell she had no objection whatsoever to long hair or earrings with fangs on them."
- Fleur loves ze bad boys.
— Apr 26, 2020 12:30AM

Notes:
(1) Continuity error. This is set in 1994, the Macarena (see gif) wasn't a thing until 1996.
- The male cheerleader on the right's creeping me out.
(2) "Fleur ... was eyeing Bill with great interest over her mother’s shoulder. Harry could tell she had no objection whatsoever to long hair or earrings with fangs on them."
- Fleur loves ze bad boys.
Jayson
is 81% done

Glitchreads:
(1) Somehow, my recent review for "Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban" switched editions. Normally I'd switch it back, but it's the second review I've written for the book, and Goodreads only lets you switch the edition of either your earlier or more popular review. So now my book covers no longer match! and my OCD is driving me nuts!
— Apr 25, 2020 12:10AM

Glitchreads:
(1) Somehow, my recent review for "Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban" switched editions. Normally I'd switch it back, but it's the second review I've written for the book, and Goodreads only lets you switch the edition of either your earlier or more popular review. So now my book covers no longer match! and my OCD is driving me nuts!
Jayson
is 79% done

Notes:
(1) Krum's oddly puritan about Hermione possibly being with other guys. Who knew?
(2) Hagrid: “The less you lot ’ave ter do with these foreigners, the happier yeh’ll be. Yeh can’ trust any of ’em.”
Harry: “You were getting on all right with Madame Maxime.”
Hagrid: “Don’ you talk ter me abou’ her! ... You can’ trust any of ’em!”
- Xenophobic much?
— Apr 24, 2020 12:40AM

Notes:
(1) Krum's oddly puritan about Hermione possibly being with other guys. Who knew?
(2) Hagrid: “The less you lot ’ave ter do with these foreigners, the happier yeh’ll be. Yeh can’ trust any of ’em.”
Harry: “You were getting on all right with Madame Maxime.”
Hagrid: “Don’ you talk ter me abou’ her! ... You can’ trust any of ’em!”
- Xenophobic much?
Jayson
is 77% done

Notes:
(1) 'Both Harry’s and Ron’s [Easter eggs] were the size of dragon eggs and full of homemade toffee. Hermione’s, however, was smaller than a chicken egg. Her face fell when she saw it.
"Your mum doesn’t read 'Witch Weekly,' by any chance, does she, Ron?" she asked quietly.
"Yeah ... Gets it for the recipes."
Hermione looked sadly at her tiny egg.'
— Apr 23, 2020 12:10AM

Notes:
(1) 'Both Harry’s and Ron’s [Easter eggs] were the size of dragon eggs and full of homemade toffee. Hermione’s, however, was smaller than a chicken egg. Her face fell when she saw it.
"Your mum doesn’t read 'Witch Weekly,' by any chance, does she, Ron?" she asked quietly.
"Yeah ... Gets it for the recipes."
Hermione looked sadly at her tiny egg.'
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Aleena
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Apr 14, 2020 12:40AM
Your updates are always hilarious 😂
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I always found the band in the movie weird, the way they song about wizards. It'd be kind of like a muggle band singing about how great it is to be a bicycle repairman.
Juho wrote: "I always found the band in the movie weird, the way they song about wizards. It'd be kind of like a muggle band singing about how great it is to be a bicycle repairman."I've just watched the scene over again, and they don't actually sing about wizards at all. The first song names off a bunch of magical creatures, you can't make out the lyrics to the second song, and the third one has pun lyrics about not letting the magic die.
Having said that, there are many muggle songs I know that are about mundane things like occupations and bicycles, so I wouldn't see it being any way out of the ordinary if a wizard band did in fact sing about wizards.
Juho wrote: "Maybe I misremembered the scene. It's been a few years since I saw the movie."Entirely understandable. Happens to me all the time 😁👍
Jayson, I have very recently given in to my frnd's constant nagging n read Harry Potter, ur update made me laugh all the more 😂 n happy too, knowing that I'm not the only one who felt that way about poor dear Ron😁 he remains the most true to life, widely relatable character of the whole series, or so I feel, personally I have many of the annoying habits of Hermione, but Ron is my fvrt☘
Amber wrote: "Jayson, I have very recently given in to my frnd's constant nagging n read Harry Potter, ur update made me laugh all the more 😂 n happy too, knowing that I'm not the only one who felt that way abou..."I'm glad to hear my updates have added to the experience of reading the series! Ron's also my favorite of the main three, and it's been very nice to return to the text to point out his virtues and tidy-up his reputation, which the films sadly soiled.
Sara wrote: "Oh my gosh- that gif just literally made me laugh out loud! That made my DAY :D"Thrilled to hear that, Sara! Laughing out loud is one of my favorite reactions to reviews and updates I write, second only to spitting out drinks 😁👍
Sara wrote: "Ha! For some reason I just pictured you leaning back in your chair with your fingers tented, laughing with an evil cackle...😋"Well, who's to say that isn't happening? I can neither confirm nor deny 😁
Sara wrote: "Jayson wrote: "Sara wrote: "Ha! For some reason I just pictured you leaning back in your chair with your fingers tented, laughing with an evil cackle...😋"Well, who's to say that isn't happening? ..."
Likewise 💁♂️ the films did not do justice to his character like he's a mere comic relief! Glad that u too feel that way about Ron 😁👌
Amber wrote: "Likewise 💁♂ the films did not do justice to his character like he's a mere comic relief! Glad that u too feel that way about Ron 😁👌"Absolutely! Ron plays a crucial role in the group. Harry and Hermione were raised by muggles. Ron's the window into the wizarding world for both them and the reader. In the same way that Hermione's smarts is a literary device for exposition about history and spell knowledge, Ron plays the same role for common sense wizarding knowledge. The fact that they give all of his wizarding know-how to Hermione in the films is tantamount to character assassination.
Ron is, in a way, "worldly wise" and even creative at times. U r right, the movies simply wipe it all out. 😒
Amber wrote: "Ron is, in a way, "worldly wise" and even creative at times. U r right, the movies simply wipe it all out. 😒"And there was no reason to do it other than to possibly make Hermione shine brighter by comparison.
Not just Hermione, she already shines bright, its to present a foil to Harry himself, to glorify Harry or so it seems to me, as in there should be One Hero n so the other boy has to b shown as a "side-kick".
Amber wrote: "Not just Hermione, she already shines bright, its to present a foil to Harry himself, to glorify Harry or so it seems to me, as in there should be One Hero n so the other boy has to b shown as a "s..."That's true too. To a degree that's understandable since films are relatively short and you don't want to spread focus too thin. But it's still a shame. I just mentioned Hermione because they regularly lifted Ron quotes verbatim and gave them to Hermione to say in the films, when Ron could have just said them. So it was specifically a transfer of his knowledge to her, which I always make sure to point out in my updates when I spot them :)
Qwerty wrote: "that img age wont work on kindle XD"Qwerty wrote: "*image"
The gif in the status or the gif in the comments? Well, either way that's sad to hear that Kindle users are missing out. If future I'll have to make it so that the message is conveyed regardless.




