Lexphie (The Animal Lover)

“Fang: When do I get out of here?
Max: They say a week.
Fang: So, like, tomorrow?
Max: That's what I'm thinking.”
― James Patterson, School's Out—Forever

“I'm a girl of extremes. When I love something, I'm like a puppy dog (without all the licking). When I'm cranky, I'm a wasp (like a whole hive of 'em). And when I'm angry, I'm a Mother Bear with a predator after her cubs: Dangerous.”
― James Patterson, Fang

“The fight unfolded like background noise. White noise. In the foreground, even with his ghastly pale face looking dead in my hands, my fingers clenching his ragged hair, all I could see was random images of Fang, not dead.

Fang telling me stupid fart jokes from the dog crate next to mine at the school, trying to make me laugh.

Fang asleep at Jeb's old house, and me jumping wildly on his bed to wake him up. Him pretending to be asleep. Me laughing when I "accidentally" kicked him where it counts. Him dumping me off the bed.

Fang gagging on my first attempt at cooking dinner after Jeb disappeared. Him spitting out the mac and cheese. Me dumping the rest of the bowl on him in response.

Fang on the beach, that first time he was badly injured. Me realizing how I felt about him.

Fang kissing me. So close I couldn't even see his dark eyes anymore. The first time. The second time. The third.

I could always remember each and every one of them. Would always remember them.

Fang.

Not.

Dead.”
― James Patterson, Fang

“do you ever have dirty thoughts about spongebob?”
― James Patterson