JB

“I’ve become one of those parents who demand their children go to the bathroom. “But I don’t have to.” “Well, go anyway.”
― Jim Gaffigan, Dad Is Fat

“I’m getting fat … as I planned. Luckily, my gut is intentional. I’m actually preparing for a big role. Sure, it’s a cinnamon roll, but I want there to be room for it.”
― Jim Gaffigan, Dad Is Fat

“It surely is far better to be disliked by somebody you don't love than by somebody you do. Even so, I mind. Even so, failing to love somebody is a failure.”
― Wendell Berry, Jayber Crow

“Nursery schools and bars at 2 a.m. are the only places where it is completely normal if someone just spontaneously throws up on the floor...and just like a toddler, the bar patron wakes up the next day not remembering or caring how they behaved.”
― Jim Gaffigan, Dad Is Fat