The Mystery, Crime, and Thriller Group discussion
Fun & Games
>
Five Word Build-a-Story
Singapore being a nation state where mayhem isn't done, induced unexpected civility and sobriety from our Fems. Decked out in Louboutins and Versace, the Fems swayed into Customs. When the officer looked at Joe, however, he couldn't help himself, breaking into a sweat with his guilty conscience of a thousand thousand sins. "We're innocent, I swear. No sabotage or genocide up our sleeves!" he stammered. The Fems looked at each other, sighing heavily as the customs officer waved over some reinforcements. "Oops," said Joe.Luck
Confrontation
Uncompromising
Fever
Comic
As LUCK would have it a CONFRONTATION was avoided, thanks to the arrival of the famous COMIC that our gal April was channeling - Joan Rivers! - whose UNCOMPROMISING wrath and sarcasm and botox whipped the customs crew into a FEVER of a pitch and our Fems & Joe slipped away unnoticed.Gluten
Decapitated
Cranium
Butt cheeks
Cellulite
"Can we talk?" asked April. "Just a sec, hon," said T. "I think that glowcat left hair on my butt cheeks." Sheila smiled a crooked smile and whispered to Val. "What?" asked T, grimly. "Nothing sweetie." grinned Sheila. "We were thinking you have no cellulite." said loyal Val. Joe broke in, sensing a cat fight. "Ladies! I hope our glowcat is not decapitated by that hidden compartment in my luggage! We don't get paid for a cat without a cranium." Cam pointed at an airport store. "Look, food, I'm starved!" Joe said, "Ahh! It's all that gluten-free crap!" "I don't care, I'm starved. All I had was nuts for the last 24 hours," said Cam.Dramatic
Darling
Digging
Delirious
Dead
Always the DRAMATIC and drop DEAD gorgeous April creating the next eye of the storm, our DARLING Fems raced towards sustenance, hauling our boy Joe along since he had the credit cards. DELIRIOUS with hormones, pheromones and the scent of fried foods, the Fems were DIGGING into their fast food haul when a dead body landed with a resounding plop into their condiments.Trash-talking
Recycle bin
Golf cart
Rancid oil
Helium
While overhearing someone "trash-talking" about bad events happening in Singapore, Joe, T and the Fems lifted the dead body onto a nearby "golf cart" and threw him into the "recycle bin". "Rancid oil" splattered from the bin. Cam trying to think positive, noticed the pretty "helium" balloon floating towards the sun.T
fine
coffee
salt
wound
T, being from the land of Star$$, knew that the SALT shaker would not be good in either the COFFEE or a WOUND, no matter how FINE or coarse the salt was....But for luck, she threw some of the salt at the helium balloons.....Whooping cough
Stork
Scandal
Game show
Hibiscus
This story just keeps getting stanger. It really could be a "game show" named "Scandal". The next question could be about that stupid "stork" that has been spreading not babies around the world but "Whooping cough". Hurry get the "hibiscus" tea ready to drink. Subway
Suffer
Supper
Summer
Substance
Joe, ever the SUBSTANCE abuser, wanted to stop at the SUBWAY shop as he thought he would SUFFER without a SUPPER of their Italian sub-n-salad. Hawaii felt like SUMMER, and to Joe, summer meant salad. Hold the dead body please.Catechism
Scotch broom
Birthday
Pate
Fried chicken
The Fems decided that Joe had been nibbling on SCOTCH BROOM again as he thought he was in Hawaii when clearly he was in Singapore. " At least he didn't strip down to his BIRTHDAYsuit like the last time," Val sighed. T and April wanted FRIED CHICKEN so they stopped at the Singapore Colonel's and went through the CATECHISM neccesary to get good grub. Joe, slowly coming around, scratched his PATE, and ordered corn on the cob.moldy
hives
sexy
serious
rock star
Singapore was having a rainy period and the bee "hives" were getting "moldy" The "rock star" that was extremely "sexy" was "serious" about saving the hives. He was addicted to honey it seemed.Mariners
Isle
Wheel
Premiere
Angry
The Fems were angry. "Ok, Joe, this is too much. We are here one hour and we have to hide a dead body?" exclaimed April. "The wheel turns..." said Joe "Oh, flicking hell," sighed April. "what was in his salad?" The Fems diplomatically bit their tongues as they paused to remember the various escapades and face plants they pulled April out of. "Anyway, I think we are to meet the guy who wants the glowcat at an aquarium called the Mariners Isle." said Sheila. Val frowned. "isn't there a rock star premiere going on there, like Lady Gaga?" Cam laughed. "we should fit right in."Hypothesis
Rigor
Functional
Strung
Monster
An hour later, the Fems showed up at the aquarium. April, "strung" out on something she borrowed from Joe, wasn't too "functional" and Joe even less so. T had forgotten the tickets in the car and since no one wanted to walk back they all snuck in through the janitor's door. April, giggling and hiccuping, startled the group with her "hypothesis" on the "rigors" of a rock star's life. "Why, I once travelled the country with The Gila "Monsters" she belched. "It was sooooo like awesome!" Just then Cam spotted three suspicious looking groupies. Nudging Val, she said, "Are they carrying glow cats?".elevator
plastic
phaser
threatening
cigarette
Rushing to the ELEVATOR and jamming her index finger against the PLASTIC button, April waved her forbidden CIGARETTE around in a THREATENING manner, while T pointed her imaginary PHASER at the three groupies eying her glowing torso thanks to that glowcat that T thinks is still in her shirt, but what does she know, she forgot she left Hawaii and wound up in Singapore without a passport....Stupendous
Disney World
Glow Mouse
Snuffleupagus
Symbiotic
Val, in a moment of STUPENDOUS bravery, walked over to the three groupies and said "Hey, I saw you guys at DISNEY WORLD. You were in the parade with GLOW MOUSE and SNUFFLEUPAGUS." The leader groupie, a 6 foot tall spiked haired chick in a mini skirt, yawned and said something about never ever going to that mouse park. Joe, getting into the charade, winked at the groupies and used his masculine charms to distract them long enough for T to hand off the glow cat she had to Cam. April, noticing that T had developed a SYMBIOTIC relationship with the Glow Cat, hugged her friend, whispering, "they've got 3 more. Let's move!"recklessly
soup
phantasmagorical
teenagers
Love Boat
T, Val and Sheila were like teenagers with their new glowcats. It had been reckless, but offering Joe's pharmaceutical carry-on to the groupies had worked like a charm. Now they had four! T, Cam, Val and Sheila cuddled the little cute kitties, who glowed in response. April smiled at them, not quite sure of what she was seeing. "They've got phantasmagorical special effects in this aquarium! You all got glowing chests! Where's Joe?" Annoyed, the girls watched April. " How long before she stops seeing double?" said Val. Suddenly, Joe hollered, "Help! I'm being kidnapped! The groupies are taking me to something they are calling the Love Boat!". "Oh oh. He's in the soup, now," said April, slowly. "That's a notorious underworld casino here."Etchings
Estrogen
Embattled
Embroider
Embalm
April purred, oozing ESTROGEN, "Say ladies, want to see my ETCHINGS?"...The poor EMBATTLED Joe piped up, "SURE DO!", helping to EMBROIDER April's ruse and lend credence to the spectacularity of her ETCHINGS, all the while the other Fems and GlowCats worked on their plan to EMBALM the Glow Groupies.....And oh by the way, our boy Joe came up with his own Glow Kitty and guess where he was a'glowin'....Snorkel
Octopus
Gonzo
Bieber
Smokin'
They noticed Justin "Bieber" smokin a candy cigar. Gonzo the clown offered him a Cuban cigar but he refused since all the teenagers were watching him. Joe put on his Snorkel and went inside the "octopus" tank and his glowin slowly faded.Hair
Cat litter
Undertaker
Shark
Bubbles
Call in the "undertaker" and get someone to catch that "shark". What is all that stuff floating in the "bubbles". Maybe it is "cat litter" but I think that is "hair" floating. Moment
Quiver
Logorrhea
Facinorous
Drain
Well, better that our FACINOROUS crew suffer from LOGORRHEA rather than the other -rhea which would require a long DRAIN of the tank. Those wonderous glow-felines sent everyone into a QUIVER of awe and delight, and in just that MOMENT of time pausing, the Glow Groupies were rounded up and tossed into the piranha tank.Petite
Pulchritude
6-pack
Prude
Portabella
April was thinking that Sheila must have been drinking a 6-pack of coffee to have such words to offer poor T when the screaming from the piranha tank drew her attention. "Quick" said Joe, "We gotta go now!" Sheila stared at Joe's chest. " what?" he yelled. "You've got 8 petite tentacles poking out of your shirt." He grabbed her and pulled her to the exit. April wondered if anyone would notice the pulchritude group with glowing purring chests and a man with waving tentacles dripping water racing through the aquarium. Then she stopped. "I smell Portabella mushrooms! I want some" She turned down a hallway, where a naked groupie stood. "Do I know you?" she wondered. "I recognize that tattoo down there." It said, If You Can Read This, You Must Not Be A Prude.Illicite
Ignoble
Iguana
Impudent
Impractical
< april, how can i type with my hands over my eyes and me falling out of my chair??!! >
"Isn't it "impudent" and "impractical" to throw the groupies into the fish tank--this seems like a very "illicite" act and an "ignoble" one but that is the craziness of the game." Joe stated to all.cat
scratch
fever
madness
lungs
Just then, a glow CAT decided to SCRATCH our boy Joe, just as he was reaching a FEVER of a pitch in the MADNESS of the current escapade. With a giant whoosh, all the air left Joe's LUNGS and he lapsed into silence, while the missing IGUANA, borrowed from above wandered off into the sunset.Rock-n-roll
Mermaid
Don Ho
Synapses
Shock
Fortunately a MERMAID came along and performed mouth to mouth recovery on Joe. The "synapses" in his brain suddenly came back to life and he no longer was in "shock". Don Ho and Justin Bieber started singing old "rock-n-roll" songs from the fifties.red
white
blue
harley
home
Cam came riding in on a "Harley" carrying the "home" first aide kit. Justin Bieber was wearing a shiny "blue" jumpsuit, apparently channeling Elvis and singing some song about a horse and cat making out. I do believe he was imbibing something in that "red" bottle in his hand. Don Ho was in "white" cuz he is a ghost. Madame
Atom
Golly
Myth
Spook
Lucky for Joe that the mermaid had just been out drinking with her favorite MADAME and was breathing alcohol fumes into him. Unfortunately, Don the SPOOK was out to prove that his reputation was not a MYTH and was trying to horn in on the action. "GOLLY," thought Joe, "all I need is an appearance from ATOM Ant and my wildest dreams would be fulfilled!"Hilarity
Improbable
Sordid
Bodice-ripping
Snootful
The mermaid took the octopus from Joe's shirt and kissed it. It winked at her and wrapped its arms around her. Joe stood up and thought that the mermaid might do something sordid and he should stick around. "Hey, what's your name?" he asked politely. "Henry," said the mermaid. "We named him that because of the eight arms." "No, I mean yours." snorted Joe. April appeared from a hallway, stuffing something into her bra. She looked around and laughed. "what's so funny?" said Joe. "This is so improbable. No way a ghost as old as Don Ho can out-sing Bieber," she sputtered in hilarity. Suddenly, the tanked groupies burst in, dripping water and with piranha hanging all over. They spotted our gang and with mean looks started for Joe. April, raced to the mermaid and pushed her towards the groupies. The octopus went for the fish, entangling all with its tentacles. The Fems grabbed Joe and all headed for the exit. Outside, Cam pointed to a massive building with neon everywhere. "Let's hide there. We can get a snootful, too!" she said. Sheila read the signs on the club front -'Featured for your pleasure, live on stage, Bodice-Ripping!" "OMG, let's go!" she screamed. They ran across the street and Joe paid the door fees, while the girls pet their glowing bosoms, mystifying the door man. Suddenly, T was jostled by a short person bustling by her. "Out of my way. Did Ferocious Flea come out here?" the helmeted being declared. "Up and at 'em, Atom Ant!"General
Gender
Gladiator
Gloves
Gloat
In GENERAL, the Fems were not so rambunctious, not kid GLOVES and GENDER stereotypic, but not so outgoing and visible, either. Must've been ringleader April's effect causing the GLADIATOR grandstanding and the Glow Cat GLOAT....not a bad thing, we loves us our April Meow, but she certainly does have a way about her and takes us on some escapades, doesn't she....Catnip
Sniffing
Tummy rub
Snoozer
Circus
Joe, realizing that they might be stuck for too long in the bodice ripping joint, tactfully reminded the Fems that they had to deliver the glow cats. "Our GENERAL orders are clear" he said. We will have to hand deliver them so I think we need to purchase several pairs of GLOVES." April, Cam, Sheila, T, Val, and whoever else was in the madcap group of Fems, ignored Joe as was their wont. Atom Ant walked onto the stage and ripped off his bodice. "I don't want to GLOAT" shouted April, "but my bodice is way more bodacious than his. He's even the wrong GENDER for such thing." Joe, annoyed by the Fem's petulance, pulled out his GLADIATOR hat and steered them all out the door. Val, obediently following Joe, asked what does Facinorous mean????submarine
nazi
butterfly
turquoise
pottery
"Seriously", Val asked, what does Facinorous mean?" And T you are too fast for me. I will have to use my CATNIP SNIFFING CIRCUSTUMMY RUB technique to get out of this spot." She sniffed, rubbed, and trapezed ahead. Joe, glad to have them moving, flagged down a passing taxi and they all piled on top of each other in the back seat. "Airport driver" he shouted. T, quite the SNOOZER, nodded off either from exhaustion or the fact that 3 Fems were on top of her.
submarine
nazi
butterfly
turquoise
pottery
T can't remember where they are now, somehow she recalled the thought of the Soup NAZI after a SUBMARINE ride, or was that sandwich? And it seemed like the Fems were now adorned with POTTERY and TURQUOISE which made her think of Arizona or New Mexico or one of those arid desert-y places...About the only thing she was getting right, thanks to Google, was that facinorous was a pretty cool compliment, meaning "extremely wicked" and she felt that was wicked in a really good way!Abattoir
Gluteus maximus
Glow catnip
Diesel
Sequim
April thinks the plot has become an abattoir of dead story threads which makes her tighten her Gluteus Maximus uncomfortably. Fortunately, the Fems ground her in old fashioned normality, such as in the staid little town of Sequim, which, oops, is in the middle of a murder epidemic, according to the web. Never mind. To continue, I think, we pick up the ladies near the airport with the glow cats in the taxi, having made a stop to get special Glow catnip. Suddenly, April jumps up in the back seat and yells, "Stop!" "What,what!" screeches Joe. "My pussy is scratching me!" "Oh?" said Joe, real casually flicking his eyes down. Unfortunately, so did the cab driver. Suddenly, there is an awful crash and in the following silence, the smell of diesel. "Meow?" said a charming calico sitting on April's head. It licked April's nose.Swish
Swill
Swing
Swelter
Swept
Val, spurting things from her orafixes after April's comment on the pussy, asked Joe where they were headed. T, working her way up from the bottom of the pile of Fems, SWEPT the hair off her head and after taking a SWILL from the flask she had permanently attached to her right forearm, slurred "Joe, where are we going?".It seemed no one knew. Cam, one to always question authority, asked Joe if he had a SWISH of a @!$$%%@@! idea where they were off to. Finally, Joe confessed they were headed to do a SWING shift at a local dive where he had worked before he had become Joe the Paramour and Super Spy.
silly
angry
lobotomy
mother
cranium
T, putting her college degree to work, informed the crew that they were SILLY and was a LOBOTOMY performed in that there CRANIUM? ANGRY from having been placed at the bottom of the heap, she swore on her MOTHER that she would only be on the top from now on, no matter what, her and the Glow Cats.Concert
Bouncer
Cheap beer
Loose women
Menopause
"Menopause" is no reason to give up your "loose women" status. "Cheap beer" and a rock "concert" is all that is needed for the Fems to get wild. The "bouncer" was only able to throw out Joe and the runaway Glow Cats,since the Fems are way to smart and quick to get caught up in that mess. Vodka
Nascar
Engines
Meow
Glorious
Joe landed on the sidewalk with a resounding thud. The glow cats began running in circles around his head. He thought it was a feline NASCAR and found it all very GLORIOUS although it was probably just VODKA doing the thinking. "Start your ENGINES glow cats!" he shouted sillily. A chorus of MEOW, MEOW, MEOW MWOW sung to the tune of Stairway to Heaven greeted the Fems as they joined Joe and the cats on the sidewalk.leave
Paris
Eiffel Tower
hooker
bandaid
"Think it is time to "leave" this town, Cam said. Is the "Eiffel Tower" in "Paris"Texas?" A "hooker" who was putting a "bandaid" on Joe's forehead looked at her like she was crazy. "What are you going to charge for that?" Cam asked her. Elevate
Homage
Mickey Mouse
Police
Amble
As the POLICE were pulling up to investigate the alleged riot, Joe decided that the HOMAGE to MICKEY MOUSE needed to ELEVATE to match that of Elvis and he started to AMBLE down the street away from the fuzz, leaving the Fems to beguile the bejeebers out of the police.Nightlight
Cinnamon
Poptart
Vegas
Wayne Newton
Cam sauntered over to the policeman with a head like a POPTART and doing her best VEGAS impersonation of WAYNE NEWTON sang in a falsetto "CINANAMON let me in in". The policeman liked her routine and started clapping along. "This is the best NIGHTLIFE I've had in ages," he said.vamoose
hemorrhoids
tweezers
city bus
ticket
The glow cats began a third rendition of Stairway to Heaven in time with the clapping. "That's a sure ticket to stardom!" the policemen enthused. Then, a city bus pulled up. Joe leaned over from the driver's seat. "Let's vamoose!" he grinned. "Ok with you officers?" asked the Fems, gathering up the kitties. "Sure," said one if the officers. Closing the door and putting the bus in gear, Jo said "whew! Instead of the airport, we are heading for the dock. I've booked us on a cruise ship back to Hawaii. My contact was sent back there." "Where did you get the bus?" asked Sheila, ever tactical. Joe pointed to the back. Laying in his stomach was a man, passed out. "I was trying to get away and caught the bus. It was empty except for the driver, who was using tweezers on his eyebrows. I offered him pharmaceuticals for the fare, and he said if I had something for his hemorrhoids, we had a deal." "He's passed out!" said Val. "Yeah, well, it wasn't Preparation H because I didn't have that." said Joe. "If you have no money, how'd we get on the Love Boat Cruise?" asked T. "Ta da! It's The Dancing Fems and the Singing Glow Cats, Live on stage!" sang Joe. "Better than being dead," said April morosely.Silk
Professional
Paddle
Situation
Wetsuit
Always one to make the best of any SITUATION, our consummate PROFESSIONAL Fems began to create a few routines for their new show, attempting to figure out how to merge SILK with a WETSUIT and make artistic use of the PADDLE which would be used to propel them in the water as well as stave off lechs.Moribund
Wheaties
Floaties
Servitude
Seaweed
The Fems were barely on the bus when Joe screeched away, driving in his usual terrifying manner. T thought it would come in handy on the high seas as they would have to perform in SERVITUDE storm or no storm. Val rubbed her eyes over and over until FLOATIES obscured her vision. She liked it that way. Oh, those crazy Fems! The driver, lying MORIBUND in the back, was, in his confused consciousness, imagining he was eating WHEATIES with SEAWEED and loving it. snag
plan
dock
captain
sunshine
The Fems and Joe were sailing! Well, motoring! Anyway...out on the sun deck, next to one of the pools.... "Isn't this great!" enthused April, on her sixth Mai Tai, absently petting her glow cat. T was moribund, laying out on chaise lounge. "Com'n, have a drink." April promoted. "I haven't had my wheaties yet." groused T. Sheila stepped out, stretching, in her thong and floaties. "you are up all ready?" The other girls stared. T asked, "Did you forget a part of your suit? And no, we haven't been to bed yet, actually." "You'll love it when you do, but crew quarters ARE a little small. Servitude has a dark side." Val stepped out, in her polka dot bikini. Spotting Sheila, she stopped dead. "Whoa! Maybe you should slap some seaweed on strategically?" Val suggested. Suddenly Ashton Kutcher rounded the corner and stopped in front of Sheila. "Honey, what is YOUR name?" he said, taking her arm. They walked off. The others looked at each other. April said, picking up her kitty, "they must sell thongs on board somewhere...." T said, coming to life, "Race you!"Scribe
Silenus
Sinkhole
Scrabble
Scrawny
Dear Readers, once again our little game has hit a SNAG. Lying in the glorious SUNSHINE on chaise lounges next to the CAPTAIN the Fems sans Sheila watched the DOCK disappear as they hatched a new PLAN. Val, ever the fan of SILENUS, was drinking doubles and playing SCRABBLE with a SCRAWNY young man who looked like he'd just crawled out of a SINKHOLE. April, jealously eyed the youngster, who in her inebriated state reminded her of a young SCRIBE she had once dated. post
terror
shark
bodacious
comical
:::::Val to the rescue! YAY! ::::::
The show they planned had a "bodacious" Val, a "comical" drunk hanging onto a "post" and a few Glow Cats belting out a version of "How Dry I Am". Unfortunately Glow Cats get really seasick, as they soon found out. The "terror" of it was that without the cats the captain would throw them all off the ship in "shark" infested waters without benefit of a lifeboat.Haven
Heaven
Eleven
Seven
Even
April and T left for the gift shop to try on thongs. Val and Cam lay on the chaises watching the scantily clad passengers basking in the sun. "This is HEAVEN" Cam sighed. I could live in this HAVEN for SEVEN years and not EVEN get tired of it." "I could live here for ELEVEN" Val shot back not wanting to be outdone. Joe stomped over and reminded them that they had Glow Cats to teach. "I think they've gotten their sea legs" he said. "Most of the retching is over and I did spot sharks in the sea just waiting for me," Val said, rising to her dainty feet. "O.K. 'Cmon Cam , we've got cat herding to do!"wayward
stray
massage
teeth whitening
musical
The poor "wayward" and "stray" cats' fur got all matted from swimming in the ocean. They each needed a "massage" to get the luster back into their fur, but at least they wouldn't have to worry about fur balls. Joe was starting to become bored and wanted an acting part in the "musical". As he looked into the mirror, he noticed that his teeth were brown from smoking Cuban cigars, and drinking dark roast Folgers coffee. He bought a tube of "teeth whitening" toothpaste from the Dollar Store.weather
report
hurricane
palm
tree
Dunno where our fierce crew are now, but the WEATHER REPORT on the radio neglected to mention a potential HURRICANE, and yet that poor PALM TREE is bent to the ground and the poor Glow Cats are meowing something fierce!Stubborn
Corpse
Miss Marple
Cemetery
Secretary
Mayhem
Sabotage
Genocide
Louboutins
Versace