The Mystery, Crime, and Thriller Group discussion
Fun & Games
>
Five Word Build-a-Story
Joe thought he really should stop doing drugs, first Kitty was a feline and now Kitty is his girlfriend, or maybe she was his "guide" to that astral "zone" where he often found himself dressed as a "fireman" in full gear and yet "under" the "water" instead of spraying the water. Darned hallucinations.Syncophant
Copacetic
Theoretical
Harmonious
Oedipal
T wrote: "Joe thought he really should stop doing drugs, first Kitty was a feline and now Kitty is his girlfriend, or maybe she was his "guide" to that astral "zone" where he often found himself dressed as ..."::::: can't stop laughing long enough to compose anything ::::::
Sheila, T and Kitty decided to meet and discuss the theoretical plan to involve Fluff in an Oedipal setup (he clearly had father issues, wetting the bed ever since his father catfooted off some years earlier). Since T was the expert in harmonious meetings and Sheila brought a talent for using computers, Kitty thought this was all copacetic. Unbeknownst to her, Joe was hatching a plot to dump her soon, and was wondering if that sycophant Fluff knew Kitty was messing around with every Tom that came sniffing around, such as himself.Breezy
Asynchronous
Spectrum
Genuine
Feathers
Not to be left out of the fray, Joe's pal April dipped her proverbial paw into the fray in her "breezy", "asynchronous" manner, headed for the other end of the "spectrum" and intending to overwhelm the whole kit-and-caboodle with unadulterated saccharine (or was that margerine she often got them confused), intending a tickle-fest with her personal passion for "genuine" "feathers" as she had no patience for fakery.(no offense april, but i couldn't leave you out! lol )
Potent
Potable
Patent
Psychiatric
Psoriasis
April decided that the best hair of the dog, the same "potent" "potable" Joe favored, would help get his brain in gear. In order to make their plan work they would need to break Lily out of the "psychiatric" hospital, why she ended up there when all she had was "psoriasis" was still a mystery to the group. They needed Joe to be on board since he was the only one who knew where she was. They desperately needed her as she carried the "patent" on the computer program they wanted to use.Acquittal
Adjoining
Adrenalin
Aerialist
Alemannic
April, having sipped quite a bit of the hairy dog, slurred, "Joe, honey, you got my adrenalin pumping. Forget about Lily for now. Let's go to my adjoining room and I'll show you some tricks an aerialist showed me." T and Sheila, horrified, immediately grabbed April and shoved her into the closet. Joe said in Alemannic, "Was passIert ist?" (he was very drunk and forgot his English). Sheila said, "Lily needs an acquittal from a judge, but we have no time. Joe, who do you know that can forge documents?" April screamed from the closet, "where's the margarine? I mean, saccharin."Criticism
Memoir
Scruples
Dissolve
Horizontal
Can't wait for April's "memoir" to be published and ignore the "criticism" as her "scruples" are above reproach when it comes to Joe & Lily & Sheila...No matter that the reader will "dissolve" into chuckles and may find themselves "horizontal" on the floor, it's all in good fun and much imagination.Kinky
Sordid
Tainted
Elusive
Lucid
Joe and April's "kinky" and "tainted" love stories were enough to make a person gag. Their "sordid" tales were overheard by the neighbor who had "lucid" hearing and her memory was never "elusive".tired
fog
schizophrenia
ambidextrous
ramble
The neighbor is often in a "fog" because she has "schizophrenia". The medications make her "tired", but she is alert enough to keep up with the "ramble"ing thoughts of Joe and April. The things she has heard make her wonder if Joe is "ambidextrous". Allow
Tempting
Nothing
Glassy
Precarious
'While "tempting", "nothing" will "allow" me to live in a permanently "precarious" state of "glassy" eyed existence,' vowed Joe.Borzoi
Boris
Battle-axe
Bush beans
Burp
Joe, sick of the nosy battle-axe next door, who kept yelling that she wanted to be next if Joe had anything left after the other women went downstairs, decided to go to the dog track. While there, he runs into Boris, who has an elegant Borzoi on leash. "On which dog do you think I should I should place a bet?" Joe asks? Boris bends down and whispers in the Borzoi's ear. The dog let's out a big burp, then paws the ground. In the dust the words 'bush beans' are spelled out. "Wtf!" exclaims Joe. Boris sighs. "He's not gonna give up any winners until I feed him. Sorry. Ok, let's go Nostradamus," Boris says, walking away.Vampire
Shadows
Innocence
Negotiate
Loathes
Joe thought he better hurry home to catch his favorite "vampire" show, Dark "Shadows". Not so "innocent", our friend Joe, who tried to "negotiate" his escape from the Battle-Axe, whom he loathes with unbridled passion.Medicinal
Marginal
Maxi-pad
Murderous
Milquetoast
April, a tad under the weather and having quite enough of hairy dogs, stopped by Joe's apartment because if something had been decided about breaking Lily out, she couldn't remember. The battle-axe next door confronted April murderous-ly, "go away!". "What's with you, your maxi-pad giving you a rash?" April sweetly inquired. "You marginal excuse for a female!" the neighbor stormed. At this point, T and Sheila arrived. "Ready for something medicinal?" she offered April. "No!" whispered the nauseated April. The neighbor eyed the hungover group of women, especially the green-faced April. "if you bunch are that milquetoast of a man's idea of hotties, I guess he's not so cool after all."Silly
Random
Excessive
Bonanza
Polar
What happened after that was "random" and quite "silly". Because of the "excessive" use of drugs and the "polar" bottles of beer T consumed, the "bonanza" of insults and fists flying ensued.Tumble
Bozo
Hadeharia
Bodacious
Mat
April awoke suddenly , "my god" she said aloud what a silly dream, big John was wrestling a polar bear in an episode of bonanza.I wonder did I do anything silly when I was drunk, well I,m sure some kind person will let me know. A random thought hit her brain, did I give Wilbur an excessive amount of arsenic in his hamburger.vomitus
green
eyes
lust
lush
T's eyes closed then opened. She saw vomitus on the wall. Turning her head - slowly- she saw the green carpet and a bodacious tumble of bodies everywhere in the hallway outside of Joe's apartment. "Hell, hell, hell, hell, hell!, " T groaned. April mumbled, "too much LSD this time, or am I dead?" Sheila snapped, "T had too much, her hadeharia is going wild. Where's that bitch from next door?" April blurrily looked down the hall. "That bozo is stretched out on her welcome mat" she crowed. "what a lush!" The neighbor suddenly mumbled, "I'm paying for the sin of lust...." Just then, Joe stepped out of the elevator and saw the four bodies all over the floor. Anne, the manager, was with him. She turned to stare at Joe. "Were not these people your references?"Conniving
Random
Airplane
Probability
Intersperse
Yes indeed April gave Wilbur an excessive amount of arsenic in his food...His "green" "eyes" turned red and his "vomitus" up-chuck destroyed April's feelings of "lust". April decided it wasn't very good being a "lush".kill
red
phone
threat
hammer
looks like there was a tie above.words follow message 620:
The "conniving" Wilbur was now on his death bed. "Random" thoughts of flying in an "airplane" were going through his head. There was the likely "probability" that he would soon be dead. "Intersperse" is not a word that Wilbur was familar with when April started chatting on and on about something.
kill
red
phone
threat
hammer
< omg! i go to work and y'all just have a field day! now i'm a lush! april & sheila have you guys got a web camera on me or something???!!! > OK, on with the new Wilbur thread!
Wilbur wondered if it was true that Rudolph the "red" nosed reindeer was trying to "kill" him with a red hammer, or what was it again that the "phone" "threat" told him?
Bozo the Clown
Mr Ed
Snakes
hot pants
go go boots
Wilbur preferred to watch Bozo the Clown and Mr. Ed re-runs on television while April danced in the living room wearing her "hot pants" and "go go boots". The crazy next door neighbors were shooting snakes from the newly developed condo lots.abstract
obscure
shears
obvious
flowers
Not to be outdone, Sheila thought she would try her hand at "abstract" art and wanted an "obscure" effect instead of the "obvious" and decided to take her "shears" to the neighbor's "flowers" and try not to include any of the neighbor's body parts, at least not deliberately.....Irresistable
Confused
Demented
Potent
Combustible
Wilbur was more confused than ever. Was April demented? Did she give him potent arsenic? Did Rudolph Reindeer hit him with a hammer? Did Sheila find him irresistible and cut up his flowers because April was kicking around his living room? (what the hell WAS she doing, anyway?) Or did he sniff a combustible hairspray as he usually did on Fridays and was hallucinating? He started to cry. It was Rudolph he really wanted to date. He had such a cute nose.Chilled
Offended
Infamous
Wicked
Decrepit
The "infamous" Rudolph, he of the red nose, was mostly "offended", but also "chilled" by Sheila's "wicked" shearings. Rudy thought this to be one of the most "decrepit" days he'd ever seen, and given his annual trek with the fat guy in the red suit who apparently had no fashion sense and didn't realize how much bigger the red suit made him look, Rudy had seen a LOT.Vixen
Voracious
Vortex
Vitiligo
Vituperative
Rudy checked himself in his mirror and noticed his vitiligo had spread. Fortunately it didn't show unless he lifted his head, and besides wasn't bleaching patches of fur 'In' this year? Stepping outside that idiot Wilbur's house, he saw that vixen Sheila clipping flowers. It seemed to him she really should stop now, but humans were peculiar. Clopping out into the street he noticed a vortex, then with shock saw it was a Tasmanian Devil. "Hey, Taz! Hows it hanging?" Taz looked down. He let loose with a dozen vituperative expletives, then spun away. Well, thought Rudy, I'm feeling voracious. I wonder what Sheila did with all those flowers..Cryptic
Enigmatic
Strange
Compelling
Crocheting
"Crocheting" with flowers didn't work as well as hoped. It was a "strange" pattern and stained the fabric. It was a "compelling" color and seemed to create an "enigmatic" and "cryptic" message. Bronze
Hilltop
Ambiguous
Streaming
Kibosh
Shelia brought the flowers inside and with a strange look on her face she started to chop them up. Wilbur was sitting on his front porch crocheting, it was early days but the needlework and knitting classes were working out for him. Miss Edna his teacher was strange and enigmatic and she kept leaving him cryptic messages on his work ,like the one she left yesterday it read when the moon is at its highest two will meet as one on a faraway hill. your right there he said to himself she had known that he would find the message compelling.westerly
dark
disturbing
echo
bridge
The sun sank in the 'westerly' sky, a bright orange ball casting 'dark' shadows through the trees. A 'disturbing' howl came from under the distant 'bridge.' Wilbur dropped his crochet in fright, the sound a terrible 'echo' in his head.sinister
allow
petals
shriek
red
Wilbur was a nervous wreck. He saw sinister shadows everywhere. He bent down to pick up the crochet hook and stabbed himself. With a shriek when he saw the red blood dripping from his hand he ran down the street. He ran smack into Rudy who had petals hanging from the corner of his mouth. "Wilbur, Wilbur, calm down! What happened?" he asked. "I stabbed myself with a crochet hook," Wilbur sobbed. Rudy looked at him. "How on earth can that even happen? Crochet hooks have no sharp edges," he said. Wilbur paused. "I'll allow I'm a bit of a clutz." Rudy muttered, "You are something, all right."Magazine
Prolonged
Wormhole
Clarification
Difficulty
Wilbur looked at the puncture mark on his hand, to him it looked like a wormhole he felt faint just how much blood could you lose from such a wound, he thought. With great difficulty he got himself to Dr Greers office for clarification on his wound and and effect on his body from such blood loss. He entered the office and there sitting behind the desk was Helga the big Irish nurse reading a knitting magazine ,is this my lucky day thought Wilbur smiling.sutures
knife
whistle
wolf
strap
Helga, with the Nordic name but Irish by lineage, was quite handy with a "knife" it seems and put in Wilbie's "sutures" herself, since the doc himself was snockered again. She gave a hearty "wolf" "whistle" at her handiwork, while reaching for the "strap" she had used to hold the whimpering Wilbur still so she could stitch her double chain loops with the sutures.Anemia
Bananas
Colonoscopy
Dalliance
Emigrate
Helga was ready to perform a "colonoscopy" on Wilbur when she realized he had a bad case of "amemia" from the wound. She gave him a "banana" and told him to eat it and it would help him heal. Her "dalliance" gave him a chance to "emigrate" to Canada. Transportation
Transfer
Grenade
Jeopardy
Frilled
Joe's "frilled" travel tour package, had him "transfer" to several different modes of "transportation" on his escape from the lovely Helga, but just in case he was put into "jeopardy" on his escape tour, he was issued a "grenade" to use as he desired.Corset
silk stockings
Fruit loops
Steroids
Postpartum
Joe was in the middle of an identity crisis of massive proportions. He realized he'd been Wibur until the last 3 hours, when unaccountably he slipped universes. He knew exactly what to do. Opening his suitcase left on the bed in the hotel room, he took out the corset and silk stockings that he had held in reserve for just such an occasion. Putting them on, he wondered if his ankles looked fat. He put the grenade in his purse and went down to the restaurant for a bowl of fruit loops. Downstairs, the manager saw him and quickly stopped by his table. "Here's your steroids, sir," he said. Joe took the package and slipped the manager the hundred he'd promised. The manager remained, hesitating. "What?" Joe asked. "Well, this IS Canada, so nobody will pick on you for wearing a cute skirt with the man's shirt and tie. But shaving would definitely be better," the manager said. "How dare you!" Joe trilled. The cook looked up, grabbed a cleaver, and started coming over to the table. "Oh, oh. she's postpartum," the manager stuttered, as he ran.Winded
Startled
Storm
Lackadaisical
Pistachio
Joe's hand shot to the bowl of nuts by his plate. Bond-like, he pinged a 'pistachio' right between the cook's eyes. In a completely non-stereotypical and minor character way, the cook froze with a 'startled' expression. Then, in a moment of light comedy (that only ever makes a fixed percentage of any audience laugh), slid to the floor, 'winded.' The other diners, aware of their non-stereotypical roles, broke out in a 'storm' of applause and whoops. "Way to go, buddy!" yelled a man. "That's been coming a long time", thereby neatly providing a motivation. Joe rose to his feet with a 'lackadaisacal' wave, steroid package gripped in one hand. He scanned the room for the exit to the bathroom. He needed to get there. Now. Tablet
Lock
Trembling
Anastasia
Leather
He turned the lock on the toilet door and with a trembling hand he took the tablet marked with a skull and crossbow. It was then that he heard Anastasia calling him "sweetie", she called," don,t take the tablet with the marking on it, it will produce excesspus from your orifices and that dosn,t appeal to me at all". Slowly Joe/Wilbur opened the door only to look upon Anastesia wearing a short red leather jacket and very little else.
racket
blew
memerize
slippery
toothless
< omg, i think i'm too young to be playing this game now.... lol..... >just then, the automatic hand dryer "blew" a gust of warm air joe's way with such a "racket" yet he didn't even notice, as he was so mesmerized by the hot mostly nekkid Ana. our pal joe seemed to be hallucinating yet again, and he attempted to memorize ana, he grinned in the silly way of a "toothless" toddler.
(not sure if you meant mesmerize or memorize, so they're both there....)
Pasta
Pinky
Potable
Pickles
Perturbed
What Joe needed was some "pasta" washed down by a "potable" made with dill "pickles". If nothing else it will help to sober him up. He was "perturbed" that his "pinky" was no longer working correctly. What was in that air that the automatic hand dryer was blowing?Tumble
Bongo
Hollow
Collect
Mat
Joe's legs folded beneath him, making him 'tumble' to the floor. His head pounded like someone played 'bongo' with his brain. He tried to 'collect' his thoughts, but the room dipped and swayed. He looked up at Ana as she whipped a long cloak over her nekkidness (collective sighs of relief all round). "Show's over, Big Boy. For good." She gave a 'hollow' laugh as she went to the door, pausing only to wipe her feet on the 'mat'. "At least she's been brought up right" was Joe's last thought before he slipped into unconciousness.Green
Water
Stared
Unknown
Balloon
When Joe woke up, he stared at the green water by his face. An unknown amount of time had passed. Getting to his feet, a headache ballooned behind his eyes. Idly he noticed he had a run in his stocking, so he took them off. The manager was right, he should have shaved. The packet of steroids had disappeared. Did Ana take it? His pinky made him think of tea, so he left the bathroom. The restaurant was dark, so he felt his way. Suddenly, he tripped over something. Putting his cell in glow mode, he saw - the cook. She blinked her eyes, and her hand tightened on the cleaver still in her hand. Slowly she rose to her feet. Inscrutable
Conjecture
Romantic
Dandyish
Mask
With an "inscrutable" look in his direction, Cookie thought perhaps her chances of a "romantic" interlude with the "dandyish" Joe just might have increased. Her "conjecture" was that if she donned her Ellen DeGeneres mask, he just might succumb to her charms!Portia
Miniatures
Skating
Icicle
Dentist
Cookie thought that if she had "miniatures" of "Portia" around Joe would believe she actually was Ellen. She decorated the bedroom with "icicle" lights and hung "skating" and hockey equipment around the room. When Joe came in he was so surprised he ran into the hockey puck and broke a tooth. The trip to the "dentist" ruined the romantic night she had planned.Forensic
Tractor
Elastic
Homeopathy
Tulips
Poor old Joe is still alive after all the trouble he has seen and all the drugs he tried. He starts dreaming of better days when he was on the "homeopathy" farm, driving the "tractor" and planting "tulips" and using "elastic" rubberbands to kill crows. He has seen so many murders, that he is thinking of getting into the "forensic" field instead of the tulip field....rocks
blades
wolf
when
heard
< well done, ladies! >Mindlessly steering the tractor, poor old Joe continues his bad luck "when" his tractor "blades" strike "rocks" and breaks down. He thought he "heard" the sound of a lone "wolf" laughing at him...Wait. Do wolves laugh?
Peristalsis
Immunity
White lightning
Deviled eggs
Sulfur
So this is what going straight is to be, thought Joe miserably. Climbing off the tractor, he smells sulfur. Must be the deviled eggs he had for breakfast, he thinks. Suddenly, he felt the lack of peristalsis by the deadness in his body. Oh, oh, he thinks. Joe gets back into the tractor and digs out the white lightening booze under the seat and takes many gulps. That ought to immunize what ails me! Drunkenly, a smile crosses his face...until the monsterous bellow sounds. He looks up. To the right...a bull. To the left...a wolf. Strangely, they are ignoring each other and coming for him.Boundary
Unheard
Condensed
Contributions
Holiday
In his drunken stupor, Joe mistakes the bull and wolf for door to door solicitors asking for contributions for the Holiday Fair at the local middle school. Knowing that he's already given at the office he slurs out " why this is unheard of . . . I've already given. I thought I told you not to cross the boundary onto this property again. Hic!" The bull and the wolf both dash at Joe simultaneously. Luckily he is so drunk, he falls over and the two animals collide in a heap. Dragging himself to his feet, Joe looks down at the animals and remembers "Condensed milk! I was supposed to buy condensed milk!"
Guide
Zone
Fireman
Under
Water