Pissing Quotes

“As accurate as a blind man pissing during an earthquake.”
“Wow...,” I breathed.
She frowned at me.
“That was a great metaphor,” I said.
“Oh please.”
“I need to write that down,” I said, ignoring her complaints, fishing for my new mobile to type it out.”
― Brandon Sanderson, Firefight

“The chamber-maid had left no ******* *** under the bed:—Cannot you contrive, master, quoth Susannah, lifting up the sash with one hand, as she spoke, and helping me up into the window seat with the other,—cannot you manage, my dear, for a single time to **** *** ** *** ******?”
― Laurence Sterne, The Life and Opinions of Tristram Shandy, Gentleman

“I need to offer a sacred water sacrifice at the porcelain altar.”
― Pawan Mishra, Coinman: An Untold Conspiracy

“Why did you guys not tell me that anger management is not about pissing off the office management?”
― Nitya Prakash