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#1

“life's a bitch, and then one stabs you.”
― Jeaniene Frost

30 likes

#2

“Then you remember the dream,” Mencheres stated. “That bodes ill.”

The fear of that made my reply snappy. “Hey, Walks Like An Egyptian, how about for once you drop the formal stuff and talk like you live in the twenty-first century?”

The shit’s gonna splatter, start buggin’, yo,” Mencheres responded instantly.

I stared at him, then burst out laughing, which was highly inappropriate considering the very grave warning he’d just conveyed.”
― Jeaniene Frost, Destined for an Early Grave

tags: humor

659 likes

#3

“I'm saying that I'm a moody, insecure, narrow-minded, jealous, borderline homicidal bitch, and I want you to promise me that you're okay with that, because it's who I am, and you're what I need.”
― Jeaniene Frost, Halfway to the Grave

tags: humor, love

3338 likes

#4

“...cursing my heels and debating whether it was faster to stop and take them off--damn ankle straps!--or keep running with the potential neck breakers. Wouldn’t that make a charming epitaph? Here lies Cat. Killed not by fang, but Ferragamos.”
― Jeaniene Frost, One Foot in the Grave

tags: cat, humor, vampire

200 likes

#5

“Bones didn’t share any of my qualms about suddenly holding an arm that wasn’t attached to a body anymore. He just grabbed the ghoul by his other arm and began thumping him over the head with the loose limb. I’d heard Bones threaten to beat someone with their own limb before, but I’d always assumed that was a figure of speech. Apparently not.”
― Jeaniene Frost, This Side of the Grave

tags: bones, cat, humorous

207 likes

#6

“Where are you, bloodsuckers? Here, fangy, fangy, fangy...”
― Jeaniene Frost, One Foot in the Grave

tags: bones, cat

522 likes

#7

“Charlie whistled "Amazing Grace" as he drove. It was all I could do not to whip my head around and snap, Are you kidding me? Couldn't he pick something more appropriate, like "Shout at the Devil" or "Don't fear the Reaper"? Some people had no sense of the proper music for a kidnapping.”
― Jeaniene Frost, Halfway to the Grave

187 likes

#8

“Before we go, I gotta know: If mind-reading abilities are real, there's something else I wondered if fiction got right about vampires-"

"Ask me if I sparkle and I'll kill you where you stand," Bones cut him off with utmost seriousness.”
― Jeaniene Frost, This Side of the Grave

tags: bones, humor, sparkles

347 likes

#9

“Winston Gallagher!" I said, recognizing the first ghost I'de met. Then my eyes narrowed & I covered my hand in front of my crotch as I saw Winstons gaze fasten there next. "Don't even think about poltergeisting my panties again". "This is the sod? Come here you scurvy little--" "Bones don't!" I interrupted. He stopped, giving a last glare to him while mouthing YOU. ME. EXORCIST. before returning to my side.”
― Jeaniene Frost, This Side of the Grave

tags: bones, cat, humor

159 likes

#10

“Bring me liquor, Bones, fast, to take my foot out of my mouth.

Cat to Bones”
― Jeaniene Frost

tags: bones, cat, humor

74 likes

#11

“No one believes you’re serious until bodies start to fall. -Vlad”
― Jeaniene Frost, This Side of the Grave

tags: bones, cat, humor, night-huntress, vlad

167 likes

#12

“Your mum pounced on her and started sucking away. Would’ve been arousing if not for all the screaming.”

“Ian,” Bones drew out warningly.

He grinned. “You’re right. I was aroused anyway.”
― Jeaniene Frost, One Grave at a Time

tags: bones, humor, ian

148 likes

#13

“I doubt you’ve ever been forced to nonstop bang a woman hyped up on the undead voodoo version of Spanish fly, have you?”
His chuckle was soft. “Can’t say that I have, Kitten.”
“Yeah, well, consider me an original.”
This time, when his lips brushed across my skin, it lasted more than a moment.
“I always have.”
― Jeaniene Frost, This Side of the Grave

tags: bones, cat, humorous, love

111 likes

#14

“Will the real Red Reaper please stand up?”
― Jeaniene Frost, One Grave at a Time

tags: cat, one-grave-at-a-time

52 likes

#15

“Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind.”
― Bernard M. Baruch

tags: ataraxy, be-yourself, confidence, fitting-in, individuality, misattributed-dr-seuss, those-who-matter

130133 likes

#16

“I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.”
― Maya Angelou

89082 likes

#17

“So many books, so little time.”
― Frank Zappa

tags: books, humor

151361 likes

#18

“In three words I can sum up everything I've learned about life: it goes on.”
― Robert Frost

tags: life

109285 likes

#19

“That which does not kill us makes us stronger.”
― Friedrich Nietzsche

tags: paraphrased, strength

34020 likes

#20

“Here's to the crazy ones. The misfits. The rebels. The troublemakers. The round pegs in the square holes. The ones who see things differently. They're not fond of rules. And they have no respect for the status quo. You can quote them, disagree with them, glorify or vilify them. About the only thing you can't do is ignore them. Because they change things. They push the human race forward. And while some may see them as the crazy ones, we see genius. Because the people who are crazy enough to think they can change the world, are the ones who do.”
― Steve Jobs

68182 likes

#21

“A day without sunshine is like, you know, night.”
― Steve Martin

tags: humor, obvious, simile

35270 likes

#22

“Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe.”
― Albert Einstein

tags: attributed-no-source, human-nature, humor, infinity, philosophy, science, stupidity, universe

148381 likes

#23

“I'm selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle. But if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best.”
― Marilyn Monroe

tags: attributed-no-source, best, life, love, misattributed-marilyn-monroe, mistakes, out-of-control, truth, worst

165222 likes

#24

“He f**ks even better than he looks”, I settled on saying. Several heads turned. I didn’t care; I was pissed. “And that beautiful face is going to be clamped between my legs as soon as we get home, don’t you worry.”
― Jeaniene Frost, Destined for an Early Grave

tags: bones, cat, humor, sex

666 likes

#25

“Is that a stake, Bones, or are you just happy with my new dress?”

“In this case, it’s a stake. You could always feel around for something more, though. See what comes up.”
― Jeaniene Frost, Halfway to the Grave

tags: bones, cat, funny, grave, halfway

438 likes

#26

“He gave the body a final kick and then turned to face me.
“You and I need to talk, Kitten.”
“Now?” I asked in disbelief, gesturing to the dead vampire near his feet.
“It’s not like he’s going anywhere, so yeah. Now.”
― Jeaniene Frost

tags: bones, cat, foot, grave, one

145 likes

#27

“How about I let you floss with my jugular as well?”
― Jeaniene Frost, Halfway to the Grave

tags: cat

14 likes

#28

“Take off your coat."
"Excuse me?"
"Take it off."
"No."
"I want it off."
"Then I suggest you hold your breath. Won't affect me in the slightest, but at least the suffocation will help pass the time for you. [Vishous to Jane]”
― J.R. Ward, Lover Unbound

tags: black-dagger-brotherhood, j-r-ward, jane, lover-unbound, vishous

667 likes

#29

“What happened to you?" she asked.
"I got hit in the side."
"With what?"
"A knife.”
― J.R. Ward, Lover Awakened

tags: bella, black-dagger-brotherhood, phury

107 likes

#30

“That's you," Wrath said. You shall be called the Black Dagger warrior Dhestroyer, descended of Wrath son of Wrath."

"But you'll always be Butch to us," Rhage cut in. "As well as hard-ass. Smart-ass. Royal pain in the ass. You know, whatever the situation calls for. I think as long as there's an ASS in there, it'll be accurate."

"How about bASStard?" Z suggested.

"Nice. I feel that.”
― J.R. Ward, Lover Revealed

tags: black-dagger-brotherhood, fantasy, nicknames, paranormal-romance, sobriquet, vampires

1074 likes

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