One Foot in the Grave Quotes

“You know that old saying. Once you go dead, no one's better in bed.”
― Jeaniene Frost, One Foot in the Grave

“You called her Kitten? And she let you? She put me in a coma for three days when I
called her that! My balls never recovered from her smashing them into my spine!”
― Jeaniene Frost, One Foot in the Grave

“She's my kitten, and no one else's.”
― Jeaniene Frost, One Foot in the Grave

“Where are you, bloodsuckers? Here, fangy, fangy, fangy...”
― Jeaniene Frost, One Foot in the Grave

“I have been stabbed, shot, burned, bitten, beaten unconscious too many times to count, and even staked. None of those held a candle to the pain I felt at seeing his mouth on hers.”
― Jeaniene Frost, One Foot in the Grave

“Juan gave Bones the most admiring look he’d bestowed on him yet. “You talked her into going without panties all these years? Madre de Dios, now that’s impressive. I could learn a great deal from you, amigo.”
― Jeaniene Frost, One Foot in the Grave

“Wrong way, Bones. The men's showers are in the opposite direction."

I'll file that away with all the other information that doesn't pertain to me" was Bones' mocking reply.”
― Jeaniene Frost, One Foot in the Grave

“And that, Annette, is called Pilates”
― Jeaniene Frost, One Foot in the Grave

“Why did he have to be so gorgeous? Why did he have to stand so close, and why did I still love him so much? ”
― Jeaniene Frost, One Foot in the Grave

“And there is my payment the rubies in your cheeks. Are you properly scandalized by your wicked behavior? If you were Catholic, you'd singe the ears of the priest you confessed to. Do you remember making me swear to repeat all those naughty actions agian, no matter what you said this morning?"
Now that he brought it up, I did recall saying that. Great Betrayed by my own immorality.
"God, Bones...some of that was depraved."
"I'll take that as a compliment." He closed the distance between us."I love you. Don't be ashamed of anything we did, even if your prudery is on life support.”
― Jeaniene Frost, One Foot in the Grave

“...cursing my heels and debating whether it was faster to stop and take them off--damn ankle straps!--or keep running with the potential neck breakers. Wouldn’t that make a charming epitaph? Here lies Cat. Killed not by fang, but Ferragamos.”
― Jeaniene Frost, One Foot in the Grave

“You called her Kitten? And she let you? She put me in a coma for three days when I called her that? My balls never recovered from her smashing them into my spine?" "And well she should have," Bones agreed. "She's my Kitten, and no one else's”
― Jeaniene Frost, One Foot in the Grave

“Now I am short on some props, and there isn't nearly enough time in one night to run through all the ways I've fantasized about taking you, but I promise you this..." His voice deepened, "You'll be scandalized in the morning when you can think again.”
― Jeaniene Frost, One Foot in the Grave

“Time has no dominion over love. Love is the one thing that transcends time. (Bones)”
― Jeaniene Frost, One Foot in the Grave

“Careful, luv. I might be angry with you, but that doesn't mean I don't still want you. So if you do that again, I'll shag you right here, right now, and sod anyone who wants to watch”
― Jeaniene Frost, One Foot in the Grave

“Do you know what you’ve done?” I asked in a bland tone. Annette gave me
an inquiring look. “You’ve gotten on my last nerve.”
The table went crashing into her before she could blink, and then my fist found a home in
her perfectly arranged hair.”
― Jeaniene Frost, One Foot in the Grave

“You can run from the grave, but you can't hide.”
― Jeaniene Frost, One Foot in the Grave

“Shit. I hated her already, and we hadn’t even met.”
― Jeaniene Frost, One Foot in the Grave

“You know what your problem is, Justina? You're in desperate need of a good shag. "Not that I'm offering you one myself, mind. My days as a whore ended back in the seventeen hundreds."

The gin was abruptly sucked back into my lungs as I gasped. He did not just tell my mother about his former profession; sweet Jesus, let me have heard incorrectly!

I hadn't, and Bones went right on. "... But I have a friend who owes me a favor and he could be persuaded to... Kitten, are you all right?"

I'd stopped breathing as soon as he casually admitted to his prior occupation. Add that to the liquid stuck in my lungs, and no, I wasn't all right.”
― Jeaniene Frost, One Foot in the Grave

“I’m in, Cat. I’d never leave you. Especially when you’ve got death breathing down your neck.” “Very funny,” I retorted, since Bones was inches from my throat”
― Jeaniene Frost, One Foot in the Grave

“You'll drain me dry, but not my neck, and you'll beg me to stop before I'm finished." -Bones”
― Jeaniene Frost, One Foot in the Grave

“Wouldn’t that make a charming epitaph? Here lies Cat. Killed not by fang, but Ferragamos.”
― Jeaniene Frost, One Foot in the Grave

“Got any stock tips?” I couldn’t help but ask. “The government doesn’t pay shit for
salary.”
― Jeaniene Frost, One Foot in the Grave

“I'd address his way of trying to discourage Ian later. After all, he could have come up with something other than saying I was a whiny, smelly, trumpet-snoring bad lay.”
― Jeaniene Frost, One Foot in the Grave

“I love you, Kitten.
Don't try to get out of this. We'll see if you love me when I pay you back.
Even then I will love you, Bones called out as I stomped away.”
― Jeaniene Frost, One Foot in the Grave

“So that makes him, like, your fang granddaddy.”
― Jeaniene Frost , One Foot in the Grave

“Christ girl, Ι wasn't even going to bite you. Well, not the way you're thinking."
"I'm flattered you want to fuck me as well as muder me. Really, Liam, that's sweet."
He grinned. "Valentine's Day was just last month, after all.”
― Jeaniene Frost, One Foot in the Grave

“Once you go dead, there's no one better in bed!" ~ Cat”
― Jeaniene Frost, One Foot in the Grave

“I'm not fretting over control with you. You can have all of the command you desire as long as we're together. I'll just save my demands for the bedroom."
I flushed. Bones just chuckled and brought my hand to his lips.”
― Jeaniene Frost, One Foot in the Grave

“Bastard hits harder than a fucking freight train."
I just smiled. "I know.”
― Jeaniene Frost, One Foot in the Grave