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  • #1
    Terry Pratchett
    “Some humans would do anything to see if it was possible to do it. If you put a large switch in some cave somewhere, with a sign on it saying 'End-of-the-World Switch. PLEASE DO NOT TOUCH', the paint wouldn't even have time to dry.”
    Terry Pratchett, Thief of Time

  • #2
    Sherman Alexie
    “We're all travelling heavy with illusions.”
    Sherman Alexie, The Lone Ranger and Tonto Fistfight in Heaven

  • #3
    David Sedaris
    “Hugh and I have been together for so long that in order to arouse extraordinary passion, we need to engage in physical combat. Once, he hit me on the back of the head with a broken wineglass, and I fell to the floor pretending to be unconscious. That was romantic, or would have been had he rushed to my side rather than stepping over my body to fetch the dustpan.”
    David Sedaris, Dress Your Family in Corduroy and Denim

  • #4
    Neil Gaiman
    “Life is a disease: sexually transmitted, and invariably fatal.”
    Neil Gaiman

  • #5
    Neil Gaiman
    “It may help to understand human affairs to be clear that most of the great triumphs and tragedies of history are caused, not by people being fundamentally good or fundamentally bad, but by people being fundamentally people.”
    Neil Gaiman, Good Omens: The Nice and Accurate Prophecies of Agnes Nutter, Witch

  • #6
    Terry Pratchett
    “A good bookshop is just a genteel Black Hole that knows how to read.”
    Terry Pratchett, Guards! Guards!

  • #7
    Terry Pratchett
    “His philosophy was a mixture of three famous schools -- the Cynics, the Stoics and the Epicureans -- and summed up all three of them in his famous phrase, 'You can't trust any bugger further than you can throw him, and there's nothing you can do about it, so let's have a drink.”
    Terry Pratchett, Small Gods

  • #8
    Terry Pratchett
    “Gods prefer simple, vicious games, where you Do Not Achieve Transcendence but Go Straight To Oblivion; a key to the understanding of all religion is that a god's idea of amusement is Snakes and Ladders with greased rungs.”
    Terry Pratchett, Wyrd Sisters

  • #9
    Terry Pratchett
    “Night poured over the desert. It came suddenly, in purple. In the clear air, the stars drilled down out of the sky, reminding any thoughtful watcher that it is in the deserts and high places that religions are generated. When men see nothing but bottomless infinity over their heads they have always had a driving and desperate urge to find someone to put in the way.”
    Terry Pratchett , Jingo

  • #10
    Terry Pratchett
    “He says gods like to see an atheist around. Gives them something to aim at.”
    Terry Pratchett, Small Gods

  • #11
    Terry Pratchett
    “Light thinks it travels faster than anything but it is wrong. No matter how fast light travels, it finds the darkness has always got there first, and is waiting for it.”
    Terry Pratchett, Reaper Man

  • #12
    L.M. Montgomery
    “What is it really like to be engaged?" asked Anne curiously.

    "Well, that all depends on who you're engaged to," answered Diana, with that maddening air of superior wisdom always assumed by those who are engaged over those who are not.”
    Lucy Maud Montgomery

  • #13
    J.R.R. Tolkien
    “All that is gold does not glitter,
    Not all those who wander are lost;
    The old that is strong does not wither,
    Deep roots are not reached by the frost.

    From the ashes a fire shall be woken,
    A light from the shadows shall spring;
    Renewed shall be blade that was broken,
    The crownless again shall be king.”
    J.R.R. Tolkien, The Fellowship of the Ring

  • #14
    J.R.R. Tolkien
    “War must be, while we defend our lives against a destroyer who would devour all; but I do not love the bright sword for its sharpness, nor the arrow for its swiftness, nor the warrior for his glory. I love only that which they defend.”
    J.R.R. Tolkien, The Two Towers

  • #15
    George Eliot
    “If we had a keen vision and feeling of all ordinary human life, it would be like hearing the grass grow and the squirrel's heart beat, and we should die of that roar which lies on the other side of silence.”
    George Eliot, Middlemarch

  • #16
    Stephen  King
    “When his life was ruined, his family killed, his farm destroyed, Job knelt down on the ground and yelled up to the heavens, "Why god? Why me?" and the thundering voice of God answered, There's just something about you that pisses me off.”
    Stephen King, Storm of the Century

  • #17
    C.S. Lewis
    “We are not necessarily doubting that God will do the best for us; we are wondering how painful the best will turn out to be.”
    C.S. Lewis
    tags: god

  • #18
    Galileo Galilei
    “I do not feel obliged to believe that the same God who has endowed us with sense, reason, and intellect has intended us to forgo their use.”
    Galileo Galilei, Letter to the Grand Duchess Christina

  • #19
    Mae West
    “Good sex is like good bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand.”
    Mae West

  • #20
    Lora Brody
    “Don't wreck a sublime chocolate experience by feeling guilty.
    Chocolate isn't like premarital sex. It will not make you pregnant.
    And it always feels good.”
    Lora Brody

  • #21
    Anaïs Nin
    “Someone told me the delightful story of the crusader who put a chastity belt on his wife and gave the key to his best friend for safekeeping, in case of his death. He had ridden only a few miles away when his friend, riding hard, caught up with him, saying 'You gave me the wrong key!”
    Anais Nin

  • #22
    Mel Brooks
    “The only thing we don't have a god for is premature ejaculation... but I hear that it's coming quickly.”
    Mel Brooks

  • #23
    Hunter S. Thompson
    “Sex without love is as hollow and ridiculous as love without sex.”
    Hunter S. Thompson
    tags: sex

  • #24
    “Whenever I feel the need to exercise, I lie down until it goes away.”
    Paul Terry

  • #25
    Jane Austen
    “The person, be it gentleman or lady, who has not pleasure in a good novel, must be intolerably stupid.”
    Jane Austen, Northanger Abbey

  • #26
    Jim Henson
    “Beauty is in the eye of the beholder and it may be necessary from time to time to give a stupid or misinformed beholder a black eye.”
    Jim Henson

  • #27
    Douglas Adams
    “The story so far:
    In the beginning the Universe was created.
    This has made a lot of people very angry and been widely regarded as a bad move.”
    Douglas Adams, The Restaurant at the End of the Universe

  • #28
    Robert A. Heinlein
    “Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea.”
    Robert A. Heinlein

  • #29
    Bill Watterson
    “Reality continues to ruin my life.”
    Bill Watterson, The Complete Calvin and Hobbes

  • #30
    Jane Austen
    “A lady's imagination is very rapid; it jumps from admiration to love, from love to matrimony in a moment.”
    Jane Austen, Pride and Prejudice



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