Lohloh > Lohloh's Quotes

“I don't like lollipops.”
― Eoin Colfer, Artemis Fowl

“Artemis felt like he was six again and caught hacking the school computers trying to make the test questions harder”
― Eoin Colfer, The Time Paradox

“Certainly, Doctor. Let's talk about your chair. Victorian?”
― Eoin Colfer, Artemis Fowl

“If I win, I'm a prodigy. If I lose then I'm mad. That's the way history is written”
― Eoin Colfer, Artemis Fowl

“Let us proceed under the assumption that the fairy folk do exist, and that I am not a gibbering moron.”
― Eoin Colfer, Artemis Fowl

“In my experience, boys are predictable. As soon as they think of something, they do it. Girls are smarter—they plan ahead. They think about not getting caught.”
― Eoin Colfer, Half Moon Investigations

“Orion:"Oh, how I pray that dragon will turn 'round so that I may smite it."
Foaly: "Smite it with what? Your secret birthmark?"
Orion: "Don't you mock my birthmark, which I may or may not have.”
― Eoin Colfer, The Atlantis Complex

“Shut up, Julius! I mean, quiet a moment, Commander.”
― Eoin Colfer, Artemis Fowl

“So, what did you get for me?"
Angeline paused for a beat. "Jeans."
"What?" croaked Artemis.
"And a T-shirt.”
― Eoin Colfer, The Atlantis Complex

“Everyone says that I have no sense of humor, then I construct a perfectly sound pun around a well-known psychological condition, and it is ignored.”
― Eoin Colfer, The Lost Colony

“Excuse me, Captain. Are you two going to weep salty tears of admiration over a helmet all night, or do we have matters to discuss?”
― Eoin Colfer, The Lost Colony

“Very well, I promise. So, what did you get for me?" Angeline paused for a beat. "Jeans." "What?" croaked Artemis. "And a T-shirt" ...Artemis took several breaths. "Does the T-shirt have any writing on it?" A rustling of paper crackled through the phone's speakers. "Yes, it's so cool. There's a picture of a boy who for some reason has no neck and only three fingers on each hand, and behind him in this sort of graffiti style is the words RANDOMOSIY. I don't know what that means but it sounds really current." Randomosity though Artemis, and he felt like weeping.”
― Eoin Colfer, The Atlantis Complex

“Friendship isn't a science mudboy. Just do what you think is right.”
― Eoin Colfer, The Opal Deception

“Is that how you're going to take me? Scare me into voluntarily coming aboard, then steal my Ice Cube?"

"It's always cubes with you," noted Foaly, somewhat randomly. "What's wrong with a nice sphere?”
― Eoin Colfer, The Atlantis Complex

“Genius inspires resentment. A sad fact of life.”
― Eoin Colfer, The Time Paradox

“Onscreen, Foaly rubbed his eyelids with his index fingers.
"Yeah, yeah. Here we go. Captain Short goes rogue once more. Hands up who's surprised. Anyone?”
― Eoin Colfer, The Last Guardian

“Nobody's death is impending."
..."Well technically everyone's death is impending.”
― Eoin Colfer, The Last Guardian