Nick > Nick's Quotes

“Each of us is full of shit in our own special way. We are all shitty little snowflakes dancing in the universe.”
― Lewis Black, Me of Little Faith

“Behind me, I heard a young woman of 25 say, "If it weren’t for my horse, I wouldn’t have spent that year in college." Now, I'm gonna repeat that, because it bears repeating. "If it weren't for my horse..." as in, giddyup, giddyup, let's go — "I wouldn't have spent that year in college," which is a degree-granting institution. Don't think about that too long, or BLOOD will shoot out your NOSE!”
― Lewis Black

“There's no such thing as soy milk. It's just soy juice.”
― Lewis Black

“When everything goes to hell, the people who stand by you without flinching -- they are your family. ”
― Jim Butcher

“Are you always a smartass?'

Nope. Sometimes I'm asleep.”
― Jim Butcher, Blood Rites

“I don't care about whose DNA has recombined with whose. When everything goes to hell, the people who stand by you without flinching--they are your family.”
― Jim Butcher, Proven Guilty

“Life is a journey. Time is a river. The door is ajar”
― Jim Butcher, Dead Beat

“Laugh whenever you can. Keeps you from killing yourself when things are bad. That and vodka.”
― Jim Butcher, Changes

“Of course Evil's afoot. If it had switched to the metric system it'd be up to a meter by now. ”
― Jim Butcher

“You backbiting, poisonous, treacherous, deceitful, wicked, clever girl. If this works I'll buy you a pony.”
― Jim Butcher, Summer Knight

“Sleep is God. Go worship.”
― Jim Butcher, Death Masks

“Most of the bad guys in the real world don't know that they are bad guys. You don't get a flashing warning sign that you're about to damn yourself. It sneaks up on you when you aren't looking.”
― Jim Butcher

“I died. I died and someone made a clerical error and I am in Heaven.”
― jim butcher, Summer Knight

“If I need you I'll give you a signal.'
'What signal?'
'I'll imitate the scream of a terrified little girl”
― Jim Butcher

“What is the point of having free will if one cannot occasionally spit in the eye of destiny?”
― Jim Butcher, White Night

“So. You get handed a holy sword by an archangel, told to go fight the forces of evil, and you somehow remain an atheist. Is that what you're saying?”
― Jim Butcher, Death Masks

“Caring about someone isn't complicated. It isn't easy. But it isn't complicated, either. Kinda like lifting the engine block out of a car.”
― Jim Butcher, Small Favor

“Me and polite have never been on close terms.”
― Jim Butcher

“Holy shit," I breathed. "Hellhounds."
"Harry," Michael said sternly. "You know I hate it when you swear."
"You're right. Sorry. Holy shit," I breathed, "heckhounds.”
― Jim Butcher, Grave Peril

“I let out a battle cry. Sure, a lot of people might have mistaken it for a sudden yelp of unmanly fear, but trust me. It was a battle cry.”
― Jim Butcher, My Big Fat Supernatural Wedding

“The man once wrote: Do not meddle in the affairs of wizards, for they are subtle and quick to anger. Tolkien had that one mostly right.

I stepped forward, let the door bang closed, and snarled, "Fuck subtle.”
― Jim Butcher, Changes

“But there were some things I believed in. Some things I had faith in. And faith isn't about perfect attendance to services, or how much money you put on the little plate. It isn't about going skyclad to the Holy Rites, or meditating each day upon the divine.
Faith is about what you do. It's about aspiring to be better and nobler and kinder than you are. It's about making sacrifices for the good of others - even when there's not going to be anyone telling you what a hero you are.”
― Jim Butcher, Changes

“Ack!" I said.

Fearless master of the witty dialogue, that's me.”
― Jim Butcher, Changes

“Polka will never die.”
― Jim Butcher, Dead Beat

“You rush a miracle worker, you get lousy miracles!”
― Jim Butcher, Small Favor

“In the action business, when you don't want to say you ran like a mouse, you call it 'taking cover.' It's more heroic.”
― Jim Butcher, Dead Beat

“Regardless of what I think about Islam or Wicca or any other religion, the fact is that it's a group of people. Every faith has its ceremonies. And since it's made up of people, every faith also has its assholes.”
― Jim Butcher, White Night

“Kids. You gotta love them. I adore children. A little salt, a squeeze of lemon—perfect.”
― Jim Butcher, Storm Front

“Harry," Bob drawled, his eye lights flickering smugly, "what you know about women, I could juggle.”
― Jim Butcher, Storm Front

“Laughter is good for you. Nine out of ten stand-up comedians recommend laughter in the face of intense stupidity.”
― Jim Butcher, Proven Guilty