Ashley > Ashley's Quotes

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  • #1
    Albert Einstein
    “Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe.”
    Albert Einstein

  • #2
    Mae West
    “You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough.”
    Mae West

  • #3
    Frank Zappa
    “So many books, so little time.”
    Frank Zappa

  • #4
    “Insanity is doing the same thing, over and over again, but expecting different results.”
    Narcotics Anonymous

  • #5
    Groucho Marx
    “Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read.”
    Groucho Marx, The Essential Groucho: Writings For By And About Groucho Marx

  • #6
    Steve  Martin
    “A day without sunshine is like, you know, night.”
    Steve Martin

  • #7
    Garrison Keillor
    “Anyone who thinks sitting in church can make you a Christian must also think that sitting in a garage can make you a car.”
    Garrison Keillor

  • #8
    Jim Henson
    “Beauty is in the eye of the beholder and it may be necessary from time to time to give a stupid or misinformed beholder a black eye.”
    Jim Henson

  • #9
    “Whenever I feel the need to exercise, I lie down until it goes away.”
    Paul Terry

  • #10
    Robert A. Heinlein
    “Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea.”
    Robert A. Heinlein

  • #11
    Charles M. Schulz
    “All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn't hurt.”
    Charles M. Schulz

  • #12
    Woody Allen
    “I'm not afraid of death; I just don't want to be there when it happens.”
    Woody Allen

  • #13
    Charles J. Sykes
    “Be nice to nerds. You may end up working for them. We all could.”
    Charles J. Sykes, Dumbing Down Our Kids: Why American Children Feel Good About Themselves But Can't Read, Write or Add

  • #14
    I love mankind ... it's people I can't stand!!
    “I love mankind ... it's people I can't stand!!”
    Charles M. Schulz

  • #15
    Alexandre Dumas fils
    “The difference between genius and stupidity is: genius has its limits.”
    Alexandre Dumas-fils

  • #16
    Terry Pratchett
    “The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will insist on coming along and trying to put things in it.”
    Terry Pratchett, Diggers

  • #17
    Groucho Marx
    “I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book.”
    Groucho Marx

  • #18
    Douglas Adams
    “The story so far:
    In the beginning the Universe was created.
    This has made a lot of people very angry and been widely regarded as a bad move.”
    Douglas Adams, The Restaurant at the End of the Universe

  • #19
    Bill Watterson
    “Reality continues to ruin my life.”
    Bill Watterson, The Complete Calvin and Hobbes

  • #20
    W.C. Fields
    “I am free of all prejudice. I hate everyone equally. ”
    W.C. Fields

  • #21
    Benjamin Franklin Wade
    “Go to heaven for the climate and hell for the company.”
    Benjamin Franklin Wade

  • #22
    Rita Mae Brown
    “The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four people is suffering from a mental illness. Look at your 3 best friends. If they're ok, then it's you.”
    Rita Mae Brown

  • #23
    George Carlin
    “The reason I talk to myself is because I’m the only one whose answers I accept.”
    George Carlin

  • #24
    Markus Herz
    “Be careful about reading health books. Some fine day you'll die of a misprint.”
    Markus Herz

  • #25
    “Have you ever noticed how ‘What the hell’ is always the right decision to make?”
    Terry Johnson, Insignificance

  • #26
    C.E.M. Joad
    “Creativity is knowing how to hide your sources”
    C.E.M. Joad

  • #27
    John Green
    “Saying 'I notice you're a nerd' is like saying, 'Hey, I notice that you'd rather be intelligent than be stupid, that you'd rather be thoughtful than be vapid, that you believe that there are things that matter more than the arrest record of Lindsay Lohan. Why is that?' In fact, it seems to me that most contemporary insults are pretty lame. Even 'lame' is kind of lame. Saying 'You're lame' is like saying 'You walk with a limp.' Yeah, whatever, so does 50 Cent, and he's done all right for himself.”
    John Green

  • #28
    Charles Bukowski
    “Some people never go crazy. What truly horrible lives they must lead.”
    Charles Bukowski

  • #29
    Thomas Szasz
    “Two wrongs don't make a right, but they make a good excuse.”
    Thomas Szasz

  • #30
    Chuck Palahniuk
    “All God does is watch us and kill us when we get boring. We must never, ever be boring.”
    Chuck Palahniuk, Invisible Monsters



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