Joseph Russell > Joseph's Quotes

“Faster!"
"You go faster! My knees aren't what they were!"
"What were they?"
"Elbows.”
― Jonathan Trueman, The Treacle People: Still Sticky

“I always knew which way I was going when I didn't know where I was!”
― Jonathan Trueman, The Treacle People: Still Sticky

“Hello? Oh Nigel, yes hello, thanks so much for calling back. What? No, not very. Look, are you sure I can't get out of this Treacle thing? No, no, it's not the money, it's the people, darling. Yes, amateurs. And Northern. Well yes, ghastly's the word, absolutely.”
― Jonathan Trueman, The Treacle People: Still Sticky

“I am not scared of the dark! I simply have chronic intractable nyctophobia!”
― Jonathan Trueman, The Treacle People: Still Sticky

“We have to save the village! And the Mines are the only way to do it!"
"Could we not apply for some sort of grant?"
"You mean, forget the danger-filled Mines and perilous journey, and do government paperwork instead?"
"...Mines it is, then.”
― Jonathan Trueman, The Treacle People: Still Sticky

“Oh dear, isn't that a shame, and here's me without me peril-proof trousers.”
― Jonathan Trueman, The Treacle People: Still Sticky

“How dare you accuse my ancestors of stealing things! You'd not find a more honest man than the founder of Sabden! Aethelfuff the Stickyfingered was... oh, all right then, makes sense now, ignore me.”
― Jonathan Trueman, The Treacle People: Still Sticky

“As our heroes press on down the tunnel, the golden light grows ever brighter with every corner they turn. What can be its source? Whence comes this beauteous luminescence? What treasure can it betoken? And most importantly of all, who writes this stuff? I mean, really, 'beauteous luminescence'?”
― Jonathan Trueman, The Treacle People: Still Sticky

“Summon the Keeper of the Royal Playlist! I'm thinking a 70s disco theme...”
― Jonathan Trueman, The Treacle People: Still Sticky

“All aboard the insanity express it is, then!”
― Jonathan Trueman, The Treacle People: Still Sticky

“Maybe the real treasure was the friends we made along the way."
"No... the real treasure is treasure. That's why it's called treasure. Did you bang your head when we broke through?”
― Jonathan Trueman, The Treacle People: Still Sticky