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The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up: The Japanese Art of Decluttering and Organizing,
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Jennifer Sardam
No, in my experience so far, the book seems to encourage the reader and participant in this minimalist project to go by his or her own guidance system and choose which things to keep based on the feelings he or she gets from each object. This is the first time I've seen advice like this in a book on decluttering, and I LOVE it. Unique and inspiring. This makes sense to me, because -- at least in my own experience -- we often fail to be able to get rid of things, because there is some emotion or mental construct connected with an item ... whether it's the thought that "I might read this book one day," or "It reminds me of my childhood."
For example, she advises to first gather all of the clothing from everywhere in the house -- not just that which is already in the closet or in the drawers of the bedroom dresser ... but EVERY single scrap that's wandering about the resident's home (In fact, she mentions that, with her clients, when they do this exercise together with her, if they forget to bring in an item from another room ... she does not even give them an alibi. The rule is that the item has to go!)
Although it sounds like a gargantuan process, she says you must physically take each garment or accessory in hand and go by the way it makes you feel. If you are not enlivened somehow by it, then it has to go. According to the author, her principles followed closely will result in the participant/reader never backsliding to having to repeat the process all over again. It is supposedly foolproof and maintainable for life.
I am only halfway through the book, but I'm intrigued and hopeful, as I've already gotten into the spirit of it, and I managed to rid myself of two HUGE contractor bags full of Tupperware and kitchen drawer odds and ends, things like unnecessary plastic cups with theme park designs, old chipped plates, etc. (I did all of that BEFORE I realized I was supposed to FIRST begin the entire process with the closet and then move in sequence from there ... whoops!)
I have seen those reality TV shows, and I can tell you that I'm by NO means a hoarder; but I have lived most of my life suffering the frustration of ADHD and the heaviness of feeling/being "chronically disorganized," mostly with books, clothing and loads of "important paperwork" (spending hours upon hours some nights just trying to find that one critical paper for the next day ... ugh, so MUCH wasted energy and time). So this book is a breath of fresh air that I welcome with open arms!
If you are considering buying or reading this book, and it helps, I will sum up the major point that I get from it so far; and that is that we must realize that not everything or everyone is meant to be in our lives for a finite amount of time. We cannot go through a lifetime collecting and keeping everything that "sticks" to us, is given to us, or that we accumulate in some way. Some gifts, no matter how well-meaning, don't fit who we are. Some people are just trying to unload their own tangible crap on us, and that's unfair of them (she goes into that, too -- don't just rid yourself of stuff by giving it to a poor, unsuspecting relative).
The stuff that enters our lives has its defined purpose ... sometimes it's just a fleeting moment to be enjoyed. The greeting card has done its deed when it conveys the feeling of love and warmth across a thousand miles from a loved one; and yet many of us feel compelled to keep them all, carting them from one residence to another, piled in boxes as if the recipient might somehow be secretly notified and then hurt at the moment that we throw them away. If anything, that person would probably be sad that their cards caused so much work instead of joy for the recipient!
Books are often meant to be read when the feeling strikes us to choose them and to immerse ourselves in reading their stories. Years later, their time to be read has passed, and it is okay to donate them to someone else, to move past that nagging feeling that we didn't finish something.
The purpose of the book could have been to convey one simple truth to the owner. That cocktail dress you never really wore? Though you loved seeing it hanging in your closet, a deep satiny blue, beckoning you to the life you dreamed of ... but maybe never quite lived? It's okay to release it, get rid of the guilt of never wearing it. You were changed by it just the same, because possibly it taught you who you were not going to be in this life.
Really, it's okay ... that's what I'm learning from this powerful book ... after 42 years of feeling bad about throwing things away and trying to find better organizing tips or more storage space. Those actions don't fix the problem. They only allow the problems to live on ... deal with your stuff! That's the answer she's giving us here. I think the message here IS truly life-changing as the title implies. Enjoy!
For example, she advises to first gather all of the clothing from everywhere in the house -- not just that which is already in the closet or in the drawers of the bedroom dresser ... but EVERY single scrap that's wandering about the resident's home (In fact, she mentions that, with her clients, when they do this exercise together with her, if they forget to bring in an item from another room ... she does not even give them an alibi. The rule is that the item has to go!)
Although it sounds like a gargantuan process, she says you must physically take each garment or accessory in hand and go by the way it makes you feel. If you are not enlivened somehow by it, then it has to go. According to the author, her principles followed closely will result in the participant/reader never backsliding to having to repeat the process all over again. It is supposedly foolproof and maintainable for life.
I am only halfway through the book, but I'm intrigued and hopeful, as I've already gotten into the spirit of it, and I managed to rid myself of two HUGE contractor bags full of Tupperware and kitchen drawer odds and ends, things like unnecessary plastic cups with theme park designs, old chipped plates, etc. (I did all of that BEFORE I realized I was supposed to FIRST begin the entire process with the closet and then move in sequence from there ... whoops!)
I have seen those reality TV shows, and I can tell you that I'm by NO means a hoarder; but I have lived most of my life suffering the frustration of ADHD and the heaviness of feeling/being "chronically disorganized," mostly with books, clothing and loads of "important paperwork" (spending hours upon hours some nights just trying to find that one critical paper for the next day ... ugh, so MUCH wasted energy and time). So this book is a breath of fresh air that I welcome with open arms!
If you are considering buying or reading this book, and it helps, I will sum up the major point that I get from it so far; and that is that we must realize that not everything or everyone is meant to be in our lives for a finite amount of time. We cannot go through a lifetime collecting and keeping everything that "sticks" to us, is given to us, or that we accumulate in some way. Some gifts, no matter how well-meaning, don't fit who we are. Some people are just trying to unload their own tangible crap on us, and that's unfair of them (she goes into that, too -- don't just rid yourself of stuff by giving it to a poor, unsuspecting relative).
The stuff that enters our lives has its defined purpose ... sometimes it's just a fleeting moment to be enjoyed. The greeting card has done its deed when it conveys the feeling of love and warmth across a thousand miles from a loved one; and yet many of us feel compelled to keep them all, carting them from one residence to another, piled in boxes as if the recipient might somehow be secretly notified and then hurt at the moment that we throw them away. If anything, that person would probably be sad that their cards caused so much work instead of joy for the recipient!
Books are often meant to be read when the feeling strikes us to choose them and to immerse ourselves in reading their stories. Years later, their time to be read has passed, and it is okay to donate them to someone else, to move past that nagging feeling that we didn't finish something.
The purpose of the book could have been to convey one simple truth to the owner. That cocktail dress you never really wore? Though you loved seeing it hanging in your closet, a deep satiny blue, beckoning you to the life you dreamed of ... but maybe never quite lived? It's okay to release it, get rid of the guilt of never wearing it. You were changed by it just the same, because possibly it taught you who you were not going to be in this life.
Really, it's okay ... that's what I'm learning from this powerful book ... after 42 years of feeling bad about throwing things away and trying to find better organizing tips or more storage space. Those actions don't fix the problem. They only allow the problems to live on ... deal with your stuff! That's the answer she's giving us here. I think the message here IS truly life-changing as the title implies. Enjoy!
Claire Caterer
If I put all my clothes on the floor, the first thing I'd have to do is launder each one to free it from the hurricane of dog hair that will inevitably engulf it. :) That said, I'll use my bed and go by category: Put all the tops out and then purge; then put them back and grab the skirts; etc.
James Odom
When coming to this part of the book, I felt like she was saying that with clothes, sometimes it's more important to buy the clothes when we're in the store and then we put everything away in boxes, in closets, underneath the bed and so on. So much in fact, that we don't even know what we really have and if it makes us happy. By grabbing everything and laying it all out - we can take a better inventory of what we have and if it makes us happy and compare what we have.
When I did this, I was surprised to find out that I have 8 pairs of blue jeans, some I don't even like. I was able to cut down to 3 pairs.
When I did this, I was surprised to find out that I have 8 pairs of blue jeans, some I don't even like. I was able to cut down to 3 pairs.
Marilyn
I read up to the clothes and books part, halfway through book. It just so happened, I get one Friday off a month and the book was available right before Friday off and so I got major motivation to start the "clothes project" right away and in the AM like she says. I took all clothes from all closets and drawers and put them on my bed and I got angrier as I saw all the clothes I had, it was overwhelming. To keep from being upset about the mess, I immediately started grabbing all the clothes and handling them like she said but more with assurance that I knew I wanted to keep these. It took about 6 hrs but in the book she says the whole process is quick which she states is over a 6 month period but only time ever in your lifetime you will need to do this. By the time I was finished, the few clothes on bed I wasn't sure of were an indication to me that I didn't feel "joy" about them and so into bags they went. I feel so much better, took 5 bags to Good will. Books are next!
Sophie
She mentions one of her clients looking at "the pile of tops," so I think while you're gathering every item of clothing you own, you're supposed to put them in different piles based on the clothing subcategories. Personally, since I don't have a giant empty space of floor to put all my clothes on, I just gathered all my tops together and then once I was done going through tops I gathered all the pants together, and so on. It's worked OK so far.
Tim Dugan
not so much purge by category as chose what to keep by category
Luv
That's the way I understood it. It is also the way I did it. I started with my tops. I went throughout the house, gathered them all, and put them in a pile on the floor at the foot of my bed. As Ms. Kondo said, I was shocked at how much I had! I don't shop often at all! I think doing it this way makes the purging easier.
I did have t-shirts and work shirts, long sleeved and short sleeved, in the same pile. She talks about one woman who had mostly casual clothes once she purged, so I assume that you're supposed to mix all when purging. In that case, the client's sister had given her all of the nicer stuff. It wasn't stuff she purchased for herself.
I love my house now. I just with I could convince some of the others to go through their things.
I did have t-shirts and work shirts, long sleeved and short sleeved, in the same pile. She talks about one woman who had mostly casual clothes once she purged, so I assume that you're supposed to mix all when purging. In that case, the client's sister had given her all of the nicer stuff. It wasn't stuff she purchased for herself.
I love my house now. I just with I could convince some of the others to go through their things.
Jennifer
This is somewhat how I've always done my organizing. I dump everything on a big pile on the floor and start sorting: keep piles, toss piles, and most of the time also piles for where stuff is going to go. I find it very effective for me, but it can also feel a bit overwhelming. If you only have 20-30 minutes to work every day over the course of a week, you will likely just make a huge mess and then feel very unmotivated to clean it up. However, if you set aside half a day or a full day to work on your pile, with copious rest breaks in-between, you will find that everything is picked up and put away and very clean by the time you finish.
I just did this to my sewing/quilting area. I found the boxes in the garage with my stuff in them, and then pulled all the stuff I'd been accumulating in a corner and dumped it all on the floor. By the time I was done, I had my fabric sorted by which project it was going to and organized onto a shelf, all of my yarn was sorted and organized onto another bookshelf, I had cleaned out my drawers and replaced them with projects that I work on more frequently for easy access, and my table was neat and free to use! In short, I am very happy and have been spending a ton of time sitting in that general area of the house since I cleaned it.
One note, I did my organization of my quilt/knitting area *before* reading this book, and reflecting back on it, I was following a lot of her advice without knowing it. I think she has a lot of good points in this book, and a lot of good advice about tidying. I would give it a shot before you decide it doesn't work for you!
I just did this to my sewing/quilting area. I found the boxes in the garage with my stuff in them, and then pulled all the stuff I'd been accumulating in a corner and dumped it all on the floor. By the time I was done, I had my fabric sorted by which project it was going to and organized onto a shelf, all of my yarn was sorted and organized onto another bookshelf, I had cleaned out my drawers and replaced them with projects that I work on more frequently for easy access, and my table was neat and free to use! In short, I am very happy and have been spending a ton of time sitting in that general area of the house since I cleaned it.
One note, I did my organization of my quilt/knitting area *before* reading this book, and reflecting back on it, I was following a lot of her advice without knowing it. I think she has a lot of good points in this book, and a lot of good advice about tidying. I would give it a shot before you decide it doesn't work for you!
Rachael
hey ethan maybe you should just read the book
Jennifer Caldwell
No, she's saying put all your clothes (for example; that's one category of things) and look at them, understand what you really have, get a sense of the true volume of what you own. Then pick up each item, one by one, and see if it sparks joy in you. Yes = keep; no = toss. Repeat by category of stuff until you only have the stuff you truly want.
Jana
I didn't dump mine in one big pile (nor on the floor - I used my bed instead so I wouldn't have to keep crouching down rooting through things!)
I took things out and put them in piles by category - tops, sweaters, skirts, pants, jeans, dresses, t shirts, tank tops, pj's...
Also, just as a note, I didn't do my whole house, but I LOVE her method for decluttering clothes. Looking at my closet before I started, I thought, I could maybe get rid of a top or two... but this method has you going through deciding what to KEEP instead of what to discard. I ended up getting rid of seriously over 1/3 of my clothes, and I don't miss anything.
I took things out and put them in piles by category - tops, sweaters, skirts, pants, jeans, dresses, t shirts, tank tops, pj's...
Also, just as a note, I didn't do my whole house, but I LOVE her method for decluttering clothes. Looking at my closet before I started, I thought, I could maybe get rid of a top or two... but this method has you going through deciding what to KEEP instead of what to discard. I ended up getting rid of seriously over 1/3 of my clothes, and I don't miss anything.
Hernan Soulages
The idea is to have a clear picture of how much you own of the same kind of 'stuff'. So for clothes, she suggest you put it in three piles, tops, bottoms and overcoats. You may need more or less piles according to your style and amount of clothes.
You can pile as part of "putting all the clothes in the floor" or do it afterwards. You will still need to take each one, give at good look and think "does this give me joy?" anyway, so this is just a small part of the whole clothes category.
You can pile as part of "putting all the clothes in the floor" or do it afterwards. You will still need to take each one, give at good look and think "does this give me joy?" anyway, so this is just a small part of the whole clothes category.
Jim Black
Works for me, I dumped them all on the floor in front of a full length mirror and to go back in the closet I had to put it on and look in the mirror. Some things I knew were just a few treadmill miles from fitting, therefore holding a spot in the closet, once on, it became obvious I would have to run to the moon and back 5 times for them to ever fit again and they would be a decade out of style before I got it done. It was much more obvious than looking at them on the hanger and the image in the mirror made it very easy to end their life in my life. I like her methodology and page by page she is changing my hoarding way.
Ron Warrick
Especially if you can't find the floor! It seems to me she left out a step there.
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