Letting Go: The Pathway of Surrender (Power vs. Force, #9)

by David R. Hawkins

comes the capacity to love others. Being freed from guilt brings about a renewal of life energy. This can be dramatically witnessed in many people who are converted through religious experience. The sudden freedom from guilt through the mechanism of forgiveness is responsible for thousands of recoveries from serious and advanced diseases. Whether or not we agree with their religious concept is immaterial. What is important to notice is that the alleviation of guilt is accompanied by a resurgence of life energy, well-being, and physical health.

We can ask ourselves, could we not achieve the same motivation or behavior out of love rather than out of fear and guilt? Is guilt the only reason we don’t stab our neighbor? Why couldn’t it be that we would refuse to stab our neighbor because we love and care for him as a fellow human being who is intrinsically innocent and who is struggling to grow, but may make mistakes along the way just as we, ourselves,

Would not following religious teachings, whatever they are, be more effective if done out of love and appreciation, rather than out of guilt and fear? We can ask ourselves, what do we really need guilt for anyway? What possible service do we get out of it? Are we so miserably stupid that we behave only out of guilt? Are we so unconscious? Cannot consideration for the feelings of others replace guilt as a motivation for appropriate human behavior?

As we examine these issues and look at their social origins, we see that the Middle Ages are far from over. The Inquisition has merely taken on newer and subtler forms of cruelty. We have unwittingly bought into a system of negativity that is currently running the planet. To make wrong and to make guilty is really a form of cruelty, is it not? We have allowed others to program us with methods of self-torture, and we can see that we have retaliated by inviting others to torture themselves in return. We have allowed ...

This emotion may range from a mild wanting to an obsessive, driven craving for something or someone. It is also expressed as greed, obsession, hunger, envy, jealousy, clinging, hoarding, ruthlessness, fixation, frenzy, exaggeration, over-ambition, selfishness, lust, possessiveness, control, glamorization, insatiability, and acquisitiveness.

Actually, the opposite is true. Desire, especially strong desire (e.g., cravingness), frequently blocks our getting what we want.

Why is this so? Actually, the way something comes into our life is because we have chosen it. It was the result of our intention, or we made a decision for it. It has come into our life in spite of desire. The desiring was actually the obstacle to its achievement or acquisition. This is because desire literally means, “I do not have.” In other words, if we say that we desire something, we are saying that it isn’t ours. When we say that it isn’t ours, we put a psychic distance between ourselves and what we want. This distance becomes the obstacle that consumes energy.

In a lower state of consciousness, the universe is seen as negative and denying, frustrating, and reluctant. It is like a bad, stingy parent. In a higher state of consciousness, our experience of the universe changes. It now becomes like a giving, loving, unconditionally approving parent who wants us to have everything we want, and it is ours for the asking.

“What we hold in mind tends to manifest.” As was said before, during times of supposed high unemployment, some people are not only employed but have two or three jobs.

Personal goals were written down, followed by a letting go of the desire for them. It sounds paradoxical but that is the process: identify the goals and then let go of wanting them. One

By being totally surrendered, this means that it was okay if the apartment happened, and it was okay if it didn’t. Because of being totally surrendered, the impossible became possible, manifesting itself effortlessly and rapidly.

The mind says, “Well, what if I had let go of the desire for those things? If it weren’t for the desire, how would I have gotten them?” The truth is, we could have gotten them anyway, only without anxiety (fear of not getting), without all the energy expenditure, without all the effort, without all the trial and error, and without all the hard work. “Well!” the mind says, “if we got it effortlessly, how about the pride of achievement? Wouldn’t we have to sacrifice that?” Well, yes, we would have to relinquish the vanity of all that sacrifice and hard work that we put into it. We would have to give up the sentimentality about the self-sacrifice and all the pain and suffering we went through to achieve our goals. This is a peculiar perversion in our society, isn’t

Let’s look at this belief. If it weren’t for the negative programming that made us believe otherwise, why should we go through any cost of pain and suffering to achieve anything in our life? Isn’t that a rather sadistic view of the world and the universe?

“The poor get poorer and the rich get richer.” If we have a small view of ourselves, then what we deserve is poverty, and our unconscious will see to it that we have that actuality. As we relinquish our smallness and revalidate our own inner innocence, and as we let go of resisting our generosity, openness, trust, lovingness, and faith, then the unconscious will automatically start arranging life circumstances so that abundance begins to flow into our life.

As we free ourselves out of lower states of consciousness such as apathy and fear, we come into wantingness. What was formerly an “I can’t” and impossible now becomes possible.

At the lower levels of consciousness, it is what we have that counts. It is what we have that we want. It is what we have that we value. It is what we have that gives us our self-image of worth and position in the world.

Once we have proven to ourselves that we can have, that our basic needs can be fulfilled, that we have the power to provide for our own needs and those of others who are dependent upon us, the mind begins to become more interested in what it is that we do. Then, we move to a different social set in which what we do in the world is the basis of our value and how others rate us. As we move up in lovingness, our doingness is less and less preoccupied with self-service and becomes more and more oriented to being of service to others.

At that point, it is no longer what we do in the world but what we are that counts. We have proven to ourselves that we can have what we need, that we can do almost anything, given the willingness. And now what we are, within ourselves and to others, becomes most important. People now seek our company, not because of what we have, not because of what we do and society’s labels, but because of what we have become. Because of the quality of our presence, people just want to be around us and experience us. Our social description changes. We are no longer the person who has a fashionable apartment or big car or a bric-a-brac collection, nor are we labeled as the President of the So-and-So Corporation or a member of the Board of Directors of some organization. Now we are described as a splendid person, as somebody whom people just have to meet, just have to know.

This level of beingness is typical of self-help groups. In self-help groups, no one is interested in what others do in the world or what they have. They are only interested in whether or not we have achieved certain inner goals, such as those of honesty, openness, sharingness, lovingness, willingness to help, humility, genuineness, and awareness. They are interested in our quality of beingness.

If we look at something that we want, we can begin to distinguish between the thing itself versus the aura, patina, flash, and attractive magnetic effect of a quality that can best be described as “glamour.” It is this disparity between what a thing is in itself, and the glamour that we have attached to it, which leads to disillusionment. So often we have chased some goal and, then, when we have achieved it, we are disappointed. That is because the thing itself does not coincide with our pictures of it. Glamour means that we have attached sentimentality or we have made it bigger than life.

“Winning” is sometimes not as liberating as glamour would want us to believe.

Emotional goals are also glamorized by sentimentality and emotionalism. A certain excitement is projected onto the emotional event (e.g., a reunion, a first date, or being elected president of one’s class). It is made to seem more important than it really is in the overall course of events. After the event passes, life goes on the same and disappointment ensues.

there was no reality in it in the first place. Because there was no reality in it, the world is constantly selling us dishonesty, catering to our desire for that romantic, glamorized aspect. It promises to make us more important than we really are. Glamour at that level of dishonesty is a fake.

We can have them directly. We can be attractive, but we won’t get it in a fake way such as driving a certain style of car. We will get it by letting go of our smallness and owning our greatness, thereby reflecting it out into the world. We can easily become that exciting person whom people are eager to know. Just choose to be that person and let go of the block of desiring to be that way.

The way to become that exciting person whom people want to know is very easy. We simply picture the kind of person we want to be and surrender all the negative feelings and blocks that prevent us from being that. What happens, then, is that all we need to have and to do will automatically fall into place. This is because, in contrast to having and doing, the level of being has the most

Because of the mind’s tendency to want to attribute credit elsewhere, other than to the power of our own consciousness, it is good to keep a diary to write down goals that we would really like to achieve and then check them off and make follow-up notes. Why? Because it will take a while before we believe that it is truly our own power that is accomplishing these ends.

brought in the call from his brother-in-law. He so frantically desired the job that the desire was blocking the fulfillment of that goal. When he let go of wanting a job, it quickly appeared within 24 hours. But the propensity of the mind is to disown one’s own power and project it elsewhere onto the world.

They have the power, but they have merely projected it onto external forces. We are all powerful beings who have become unconscious of our own power; we have denied and projected it onto others out of guilt and our own sense of smallness. The majority of what happens in our lifetime is the result of some decision we have made somewhere in the past, either consciously or unconsciously. Because this is so, it is very simple, then, to see our past decisions by looking at our life and tracking backwards.

Of course, she got a lot of payoffs from her disappointing relationship history. She got to experience self-pity, resentment, jealousy, envy, and all those gratifications that the small self feeds on endlessly. If we look at the small part of ourselves, we will see that this is the kind of thing in which it just loves to wallow. The small self glorifies in how miserable life is, how tough luck is, how rotten our experiences have been and how mean people have been to us.

We can choose all over again. This time we can choose the positive. We can cancel the old programs, and we can do that by beginning to relinquish the gratification we were getting out of the negative payoffs.

selfishness.” The mere use of the word instantly sets up a resistance due to guilt. We all feel guilty because of selfishness. This puts us in an impossible position because, in order to carry out what the world has taught us, we have to indulge in the very thing for which it then condemns us: selfishness. To look at the subject, let’s first make a decision that we are not going to beat ourselves up about it and get into the self-indulgence of guilt.

The reason to let go of selfishness is not because of guilt. Not because it’s a “sin.” Not because it’s “wrong.” All such motivations come from lower consciousness and self-judgment. Rather, the reason to let go of selfishness is simply because it is impractical. It doesn’t work. It’s too costly. It consumes too much energy. It delays the accomplishment of our goals and the realization of our wants.

Which is more important: to feel guilty or to change for the better? If somebody owes us money, would we rather they feel guilty about it or pay us the money?

When we move from being selfish with a small “s,” we move into being Selfish with a capital “S.” We move from our smaller self to our greater Self. We move from weakness to power, and from self-hatred and pettiness to lovingness and harmony. We move from strife to ease, and from frustration to accomplishment.

Anger may vary all the way from rage to mild resentment. It includes revenge, outrage, indignation, fury, jealousy, vindictiveness, spite, hatred, contempt, wrath, argumentativeness, hostility, sarcasm, impatience, frustration, negativity, aggression, violence, revulsion, meanness, rebellion, explosive behavior, agitation, abusiveness, abrasiveness, smoldering, sullenness, pouting, and stubbornness.

Anger may come up about the technique of surrender itself. Anger that one is expected to let go of feelings that, in the past, have been valued. Anger at the fear of loss. Anger at feelings in general. Anger at a feeling that does not relinquish immediately.

In anger, there is the energy for action. This results in doingness in the world. When the “have-nots” of the world become energized by desire and move up to anger over what they lack, that anger moves them into the actions necessary to fulfill their dreams for a better life.

Few are the persons who can take responsibility for their own anger and just say, “I am angry because I am full of angriness.”

They do not realize that repressed anger is nonetheless the energy of anger and, if not acknowledged and worked through, it will have deleterious consequences to their health and overall progress.

A helpful approach is to view the energy of anger positively and to use it to fire up our ambitions and our actions in a useful way.

We can utilize that energy to create new job opportunities or find a better job, form a committee, improve our employment situation, start a union, or whatever we think would benefit our personal goals.

Instead of being mad about it, we can accept it.

One source of pride is connected with self-sacrifice. If our relationships with others are associated with our small self in the form of sacrifice, then we are setting ourselves up for later anger, because the other person is usually unaware of our “sacrifice” and is, therefore, unlikely to fulfill our expectations.

The resistance is because pressure is always felt by us as a denial of our choice. It is felt as emotional blackmail. The unconscious formula goes, “Give me what I want or I will punish you by withdrawal, anger, pouting, sulking, and resentment.” We all resent feeling emotionally blackmailed.

When we are motivated by self-sacrifice, we are pressuring the other person. Even if we force an acknowledgment, it will be a disgruntled one. A forced compliment does not satisfy. Part of the anger here arises from the pride of self-sacrifice. We have a certain secret vanity about what we are doing for others, and our pride of achievement makes us vulnerable to anger when our “sacrifice” is not recognized.

This means that we have to constantly let go of our pride in order to undo anger, so that we can be grateful for the continual opportunities of growth with which we are presented in the course of everyday experience.

One way we force ourselves out of unsatisfactory situations is by making ourselves or the situation “wrong.” Instead of merely choosing to find a better job, for instance, our smaller self makes the job, the boss, and fellow workers “wrong.” Because of the picture of wrongness, the situation now becomes intolerable, and we are forced to change it. How much easier it would have been had we just simply chosen to move on to a better situation. However, because of our sense of obligation, guilt is very often the block to this simpler way.