Lara Van Hulzen's Blog, page 6

RT Convention

I attended my first RT Convention this past week and what a whirlwind. This was the first conference I've been to where readers are as much, if not more, a part of the action as the authors. It's like Comic Con for the Romance Genre. Cover models walking around, people dressed up like favorite characters - it's crazy. Crazy and fun.


I was able to attend great sessions where I learned about what's happening in the business, as well as how to improve and enhance my writing. A favorite session was on sports in romance. I'm a sports fan so I gained a lot of good advice on writing athletes and their world. 

I got to meet RaeAnne Thayne. I've been reading her books for years and was starry eyed that she spent time with me, shared her writing journey. 

I had dinner with my amazing Tule Publishing Editors, Meghan and Lindsey...


where we shared Trash Can Nachos at Guy Fieri's restaurant. 

I was able to get a few workouts in - a good thing considering the nachos and all.


And I connected with other authors from Tule, making new friends and having a blast talking writing, characters, story ideas, and life. 

This writing gig isn't easy. It's a lot of work. But the romance writing community is a gracious, kind, generous group and I'm grateful to be a part of it. 
Now, time to catch a flight home and get writing. So many story ideas, so little time...

Puzzles

I have a confession to make. I love puzzles. It's true. I'm a puzzle nerd. I turn on my favorite music and tune into the pieces in front of me.  I blog a lot about how the writing life takes actual living. If I sat in front of a screen 24/7 I would lack things to write about. I have a vivid imagination but let's face it, that can only take a person so far. 
Last week was Spring Break which means my kids were home all week. I take time off then to be with them as much as possible. I'm not in front of a computer screen all day and I had time to work on puzzles. 
And a funny thing happened. Story ideas and character sketches flowed like honey. 
There's something about letting my mind wander a bit as I search puzzle pieces that frees me up to actually be creative. The act of writing is creative, of course, but if I do that all day every day, my writing will get stale. 
I don't like stale. So I head to my puzzle table. What things do you enjoy that spark your creativity? 

How I Got To Where I Enjoy Social Media (Most of the time)

I've blogged a few times about my love/hate relationship with social media. Recently I feel I've figured out a way to enjoy it - well, most of the time.


I know it depends on which social media you're working with that determines who you follow, who follows you, what you post, etc. but I have found these few things to be true for me in terms of actually enjoying social media.

1) Don't stress about followers - When I first got going on my author media sites, I thought it would be fun to have the apps that tell me who unfollowed me or how many new people followed me. I'm here to tell you, it's not all it's cracked up to be. And quite frankly, social media can be a lot like high school. A place I didn't loathe but would like to never re-visit. I've been there, done that, box checked. No more wondering why so-and-so won't talk to me, why this person doesn't want to be my "friend" anymore or stressing over if I offended someone with something I did or said. Sheesh. My head hurts just thinking about it.
Don't stress about followers. And keep a few things in mind. Many people pay to have followers. Yep, it's true. The amount of followers someone has can be bought. Also, many would like to tell you to play what I call the follow/unfollow game. You follow people, wait a certain amount of time, then unfollow them if they don't follow you back. (My mind is spinning just typing this.) Here's my bottom line rule: I will follow who I find interesting. Period. End of sentence (see more under number 3) I refuse to play games just to get followers. I'm on social media to be social. Not play some weird "I'll scratch your back if you scratch mine" kind of mess.

2) Be authentic - Post what you enjoy, not what people tell you to post to get followers. Yes, there are some things in certain businesses that draw in readers, clients, customers. I get it. But in the end, be yourself. I'm a romance writer. So yes, I post things associated with that. But I also love baseball, CrossFit, photography, my dog.... It's almost comical how much my followers love my dog. No kidding. They ask for pictures of him if I haven't posted one in a while. I'm a romance writer and followers love my dog. Go figure. But every picture or post I make is all me. No games, no hooks, just me.

3) Follow what you enjoy - I went through a phase on Instagram where I started following certain pages because of one blog I got into. A few months later I realized I was scrolling through stuff I had zero interest in. Why? I don't have a lot of time in my day as it is. Why was I spending much of it looking at stuff that didn't even interest me? I re-organized and now only follow the pages of things I'm really into. (Sidetone: I love dogs. My family teases that I follow more dogs than people on social media but it makes me happy so leave me alone. ;) I like nature photography. I like the Instagram pages that have creative book pictures. I'm a reader. I like that. Follow what you enjoy.

4) Be choosy about what you post - This one took some time for me to learn. I used to put out there whatever crossed my mind whenever it crossed. I don't recommend this. In keeping in line with number 2 - be authentic - I would say that in thinking through very carefully what I post or don't, what I put out there has changed my sites. (I'm talking my author sites here.) Quality, not quantity I believe is key. 

5) Don't be on there all day - Take a break. Go live life. In my writing I always say that if I sat and did nothing but write all day and didn't get out and live, I wouldn't have anything to write about. Same goes here. People don't want to see me post my ENTIRE DAY. Every little thing. And I personally don't want social media looking in my back yard all day. I want to spend time with friends, my family, go for walks, look around, experience the world.

Let me say this. It has taken time for me to get to this place. And I believe I will need to continue to grow and change as social media does. Over time, new things will emerge and I will once again have to pay attention to what controls me versus what I control. That's the bottom line, really. It's up to me. I can fuss all I want that social media is to blame for this and that, but at the end of the day it's my choice what I put out there (or don't). What I scroll through and read (or don't). And I truly enjoy it now (most of the time) 

I'm Not Available

I just finished reading a fantastic book by Greg McKeown called Essentialism: The Disciplined Pursuit of Less. One of the many great things he discusses in the book is how we are always available. I hadn't thought of it that way before, but it's true. I go throughout my day with the mentality that I am always available.
My husband and I talked about this and agreed that, since we both own and run our own businesses, this is a must for us. But is it? In the beginning, when first building a business, company, brand, etc. it takes a ton of time and energy. It is essential in some ways to be available quite a bit of the time. And it's easy to stay in that mode. And don't get me wrong, owning your own shop isn't the only way to get to a place where you tell the world you're available 24/7. With all our nifty cellular devices and whatnot, no matter what you do in life, availability is constant. But is it really necessary?



Before I read Essentialism, I had programmed my watch to alert me when I got an email. It also tells me when a text or phone call comes in. Handy things as a mom, but for work is that really necessary? I recognized that, although I told myself it was a good idea to be able to look down and see if it was an email I needed to answer right then or not, it really was causing me anxiety all day long. Sure, I could ignore some, but my mind was always on a text or email that had come in and I was constantly available. Whether I needed to answer immediately or not became irrelevant. I felt I had to. I have since turned my notifications off. 

So now I have a set time each day to sit down and go through emails. Read them, answer them, then move on. It can be a scary thing to tell others you aren't available too. We worry so much about hurting someone's feelings and even what they will think of us if we aren't at the ready 24/7. But so far, no one has called ranting that I didn't respond immediately. I haven't missed anything vitally important information-wise, and it's astounding how much quieter my day is. No alerts on my phone or watch, nothing "tapping" at me constantly insisting on my time.

I've talked about social media. The constant state of "connection" with people, opinions and information can be daunting. I've seen that when I allow that constant state of availability in my life to everyone and everything, I'm really not there at all for anyone or anything. If I'm focused on a text or email that just dinged on my phone while attempting to listen to my husband talk about his day, am I completely available to him or the person texting me? Nope. I'm trying to split my attention. Not a good idea.

Since being more intentional with my time and availability, I've gotten more work done (I'm actually writing during time set aside to write), I'm more engaged with my family and friends (my phone is tucked away and not alerting me to anything), and I'm more efficient (I'm taking the time to read through emails and respond well instead of quickly as I go about my day).

My fourth book released on March 1st. It was also my daughter's 18th birthday. I was available for work things earlier in the day but spent the evening soaking in a family dinner, playing board games, and laughing. A lot. We celebrated her and my book release as a family and to be honest, I have no clue where my phone was that whole time. I was present. In the moment. And it was awesome.

What Does A Valentine Really Look Like?

I'm a hopeless romantic. I write romance novels for a living. And yet, I struggle with Valentine's Day. I got sucked into it when I was younger. I thought it meant flowers, candy, and gifts. I have since learned otherwise. 

In 22 years of marriage, I've seen that flowers, candy, and gifts are lovely, but a Valentine they do not make. I'm not talking about a card. I'm talking about "You're my Valentine." My special someone. The person I love most in this world. And I've been fortunate enough to see it in the relationships of those close to me.



I just spent the past week hanging out with my nephew who is in the hospital. And what I saw in my sister and her husband was the definition of a true Valentine. It had zero to do with a monetary gift, but rather love in action. Praying over their son together. My brother-in-law making sure my sister had shampoo each morning from the hotel to shower and change. Bringing her breakfast each day. Rubbing her back and her feet. Making her laugh. My sister making sure her husband got rest so he could go to work each day, even amidst the chaos and stress. Shooting him with a nerf gun to tease him and make him laugh. Running home for a few hours to do laundry, keep their home in motion. It's teamwork personified. 



Am I against buying that special someone roses on Valentine's Day? Of course not. I simply mean to say that true love, the kind that I believe stands the test of time is more about a selfless attitude, one that puts another person's needs above their own. Holding each other through trials. Laughing with one another, despite the circumstances. I pray my children and nephews will find this kind of selfless love and will BE this kind of selfless love. When both people do that, it works. 

Do What Works For You

It's pretty easy to find writing advice. There's a plethora of it out there. And I think it's good to get advice. But sometimes it can be overwhelming. 
Over the years, I've gone to countless conferences and read many books on writing. And I've gleaned some highly valuable information from those sources. I used to hear the way an author worked and would go, "Yes! I'm doing that!" And I would try it for a while. But many times it was like trying to jam a square peg into a round hole. I only ended up frustrated instead of productive. 
I've been doing this writing thing long enough to have figured out a few things that work for me:
1) I work well two hours at a time. I have writer friends who carry their laptops or iPads or whatever with them and can write for ten minutes here, twenty minutes there. I can't. Maybe for a blog or something shorter, but not a novel. When I'm working on a book, I'm most productive scheduling two hour time blocks. I turn off my phone, close the door, and focus. Now, if things are flowing and working, I go more than two hours. It's not set in stone. What IS set in stone is that two hours. 


2) I do a certain amount of words per chapter and a certain amount per writing session. I know exactly how many words I can do in that two hour time block. I know my minimum and maximum word count I can hit and I know if I make the writing session happen, the work gets done. Book get written. I've mentioned in a previous blog post that the app, Wordly, helps me keep track of word count as well as writing time. 


3) I'm a pantser and a plotter. I plot a little, then pants it. Plot a little, then pants it. I use an app on my iPad called Corkulous. It's a cork board where I can map out my chapters and place post its on it with scene ideas and little notes I need to remember about my characters. 


I hopefully have a lot of writing years left in me. And I am certain I will learn different ways to do things that will work for me along the way. But I don't believe there is only one way to do this. No "right" way in terms of what makes you productive in a day. The bottom line is, find what works for you and do that. 

Stories Are Everywhere

I've talked recently here about my relationship with anxiety. And thankfully, we've gotten along well lately. I've removed a lot of things that I noticed invite anxiety to hang out with me more than I would like. And it's helping. 
I'm less nervous. More myself. I'm less suspicious of the world around me and because my face is in my phone less, I'm more apt to chat and engage with others around me. And I'm reminded of something I've always known but need a shot of an "oh yeah" every once in a while. 
Stories are everywhere. 
The Hubby and I just traveled to Vegas together for a conference. On the flight there I found myself chatting with the man next to me. Nothing monumental was discussed, but I learned he travels a lot and feels the TSA pre-approved fee is worth every penny. We agreed that travel jusy isn't what it used to be and reminisced about the good old days when they actually served you a meal on a flight - with a tray and real silverware and everything! 
Later in my journey, I wandered into a beautiful high-end jewelry store to admire all the shiny, lovely pieces within the glass cases. I met Daniel who worked there and learned that the store name means flower and that their new line of jewelry was inspired by vintage pieces. 
Are these important things to know? Not necessarily. But there could potentially be a jewelry store owner in a book I write down the road. Or my character may have a life-altering conversation with someone on a plane. 
People love to tell their stories. They're everywhere. I'm ready to listen...

Read Outside The Box

I read.  A lot. And not just books. I read magazines, news articles, blogs, cereal boxes. You name it. I think part of it is the journalist in me that loves information, as well as a great story. But there's nothing better to me than sitting with a stack of magazines or scrolling through blogs on a lazy Saturday afternoon. Social media can be a good way to find stories and information as well. Instagram, Pinterest, and Twitter are where I allow myself to scroll for a few minutes each day.

However, I discovered something recently. I was following people or companies all within the same sphere of topic. Writers, editors, publishers. All good things when you work in the field I do, but at the same time, all within the same box.

I believe that one of the best things a writer can do to spark their muse is to read outside the box.

A few months ago, I started blogging for www.societyletters.com. And I love it. It's not a site just for writers so it makes me think outside my regular world. It has also connected me with interior designers, fashion experts, and sites I wouldn't normally go seek on my own. I enjoy seeing their pictures, posts, and reading their blogs. I learn something new every time. More than once I've come away with an idea for a character's house to write into my books based on home decor I've seen, or even how a character dresses based on a fashion bloggers pictures and advice.

It gets me to read outside the box. Yes, I'm a writer so following other writers and people in the business is essential and smart. But if I'm not careful, I grow blinders. I don't see anything but that. 
Sometimes I forget the other things that interest me. I love history, science intrigues me, movies, music, sports...  There's a fascinating world out there and I want to make sure I read all about it. Who knows? It just might lead me to my next character or story. 

Writing Is Not A Hobby

hobby1— noun, plural hob·bies. 
an activity or interest pursued for pleasure or relaxation and not as a main occupation: Her hobbies include stamp-collecting and woodcarving.
I was at the post office a few weeks ago mailing copies of my books to people who had won them in a giveaway. The lady helping me asked what was in the envelopes. I said, "Books." There were multiple envelopes, all the same size and shape. She asked if I was a writer. I said yes. Then she asked the question of doom.
"What do you write?"
I have answered this question a few ways over the years. I say "I'm a romance novelist." Or "I write romance books." It really doesn't matter how I dress it up, or dress it down. I almost always get the same response. A silly grin and a "Oh! That's nice." This partiular person's response was my least favorite of all responses. 
She said, "Oh. That's a nice hobby." The smile she aimed my way might as well have been a pat on the head as if I were a child skipping by her window, happy with the hobby I've chosen.  
I smiled back and tucked her comment away in my brain with all the others. But I am seriouosly considering making a t-shirt that says, "I'm a writer. It's an occupation. Not a hobby." Hobby is even defined (above) as something done for relaxation and not a main occupation. 
I get it. I like writing. I enjoy it. So it must be a hobby, right? Wrong. I know many people who enjoy their work and not one person considers what they do a hobby. And I realize there's this romanticized  imagine in people's heads that we writers sit around in jammies sipping coffee, daydreaming, and tapping away at our keyboards, the muse flowing like a river. The coffee and jammies part is sometimes true, but not always. And most days the jammies part is simply because I didn't have time to change between getting kids off to school and sitting at the computer. 
I write because I love it. I love stories, characters. But many times I'm writing on my iPad in my car while waiting for kids to get out of school. I'm editing into the wee hours of the night because my deadline is the next morning, and I still have to get up and get said children back to school again. Don't believe everything you see or read on social media. Yes, there is roaming done on Pinterest and for we romance writers that includes shirtless men - a perk. But then we must shut out the world and create characters out of thin air and weave plots together to make a story people want to spend time reading. We are studying the craft. Learning. Trying to get better with every book. Not to mention marketing and the business side of things. Don't even get me started...
I would love to challenge everyone with this viewpoint. Go ahead. Sit down. Write a book. Who knows? Maybe you are the next John Grisham. But I guarantee, no matter the outcome, you won't call it a hobby anymore. 
Beacause it's not a hobby. It's work. 



<a href="http://www.bloglovin.com/blog/1407874... my blog with Bloglovin</a>

Three Apps That Have Changed My Writing Life

I talked in my last blog post about tapping out. Being exhausted and needing a change. So, I decided to take a long, hard look at my life and see what could stay and what could go. It's been an intersting and educational couple of weeks, to say the least.
Here are three apps that have changed my world:

1) Seize The Day - I noticed that when I put writing into my calendar at a certain time, I would get super stressed if that time came and I was still doing a grocery store run because my day got pushed back due to a child being home sick. If I wasn't in my office at that exact time writing for that exact amount of time, I was a hot mess. So, now I have three apps that have changed my schedule and quite frankly, my daily llife. Some writers say they won't get writing done if they don't have it on their calendars. That doesn't work for me. Instead, I now use my calendar for literal appointments that happen at set times. I use the app Seize The Day for my To Do list. I have certain days of the week set aside for writing, yes, but that is now on my To Do app for those days and not my calendar. I know I will get to it, I just don't have aa set time breathing down my neck.
2) Word - Although I do have set days of the week set aside for writing, that doesn't mean a scene only pops in my head on those days or an idea only materializes during a certain time frame. My laptop crashed a few years ago so I use my iPad as my mobile writing device. Hence, where the Word app comes in. (Some people prefer Pages. I like that one too. It's a preference thing.) Because my iPad is so mobile, it's easy for me to take it wherever I go. With stressing over having certain set hours of writinig time, came the (self-imposed) pressure to write a crap ton word count during said time period. Now, I write for 45 minutes here, an hour there, wherevever I am, and sure enough, by the end of the week, I've hit a pretty decent word count. 
3) Wordly - This app has changed my writing life. I used to keep track of word count on a spreadsheet. It was brain damage. With this app, I hit "Start Writing" and it clocks how long I work. I hit "Stop Writing" and it asks for how many words I wrote in that time period. It tracks total words, total hours, average words per hour, percentage of manuscript completed, words per week, per month...a laundry lisst of useful information that helps me stay organized. I adore this app. 
Three apps that are changing not only my work life but home life as well. These, mixed with pulling back a ton from social media, has greatly reduced my stress level, added time to my day, and made me more productive as a writer.