Ava Brown's Blog, page 11

Principles Successful People Live By

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Principles Successful People Live By

 Focus on the positives In Your Life

 Learn how to anticipate your future

 Fail forward failure can be a good thing, it can push you up

 Get some travel in, holidays are great ways to relax

 Find the right partner for business but also fall in love

 Obstacles are opportunities in disguise know when to take them

 Take risks, you will never know until you try

 Surround yourself with great people, they people you associate with says a lot about you

 Remember you’ll be dead soon, so enjoy life

 Don’t be shy to learn from others, someone else always knows more than you

Get your 15 Minutes FREE coaching session on setting your life up for success.

Ava Brown MBA, BBA, Dip. Ed.| Trainer, Speaker & Consultant | Author of Bamboo & Fern

Tel: 078 0886 6870 | Email: info@avabrown.org | Web: www.avabrown.org

How Does One Get Out Of The Rut?

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How Does One Get Out Of The Rut?



Yes, there is hope for you, no matter how long you’ve been in your current rut. And while change can be scary, the secret is to work through the fear. That’s the only way you’re going to make progress and increase your self-confidence.

1. Think Big … and Small

2. Be 100 Percent Responsible.

3. Express, Don’t Repress

4. Take Inventory

5. Expand Your Focus

6. Do Something.

If you really want a change, do something today. No matter what the outcome is of your activity, you’re going to learn something. Take a step toward getting out of the place you don’t want to be anymore.

Do it today! Escape the Rut for Good

So, take full responsibility for your life today. Learn from the lessons you uncover, and move forward with passion. Whether your action step is large or small, implement it today. By doing something – anything – you create the needed momentum to drive yourself out of that rut and full speed into the life you’ve always dreamed about.

If you want to get out of the Rut contact me let’s talk.

Ava Brown MBA, BBA, Dip. Ed.| Trainer, Speaker & Consultant | Author of Bamboo & Fern

Tel: 078 0886 6870 | Email: info@avabrown.org | Web: www.avabrown.org

Want To Share My £600,000 Cheque?

Want To Share My £600, 000 Cheque?

Hi everyone who read my blog , I want to pause and thank you for doing just that ! You are appreciated and I am cognisant that without you his blog would be useless. as such I felt I want to let you into my world and see what its like. I am certain some elements are similar to yours while others may differ , regardless comma here.

 

Describe a typical day for you?

Ever since I started seriously editing my book after being featured in The Financial Times in March, life has taken a new norm. My days are much different and varied in many degrees.

I am the last one to get into bed and the very first one to be up buzzing around every morning. I work best when it quiet and being a mother of two children at different age range (one almost 17 and the other 3), its difficult meeting their individual needs coupled with my diary and routine.

Life has gotten a bit more hectic than normal and so I am trying to recall what normal felt like. No two days are the same, so it depends on what is on my agenda i.e. if I am working from home I am sometimes up as early as 5am (I get so much more done when my 3 year old is sleeping).  I also believe the saying “early birds catch the first worms”. My creative side is best then and what I accomplish in two hours early in the morning would be harder after 9am.

The day generally stars with dropping my son off at nursery for 8am and either dash off to a meeting, a speaking engagement or settle back into my home office. Here  I could do anything from a meeting on Skype, catch up on my much needed writing for any of my two books that I am currently working or developing products for my coaching ,  planning a workshop or speaking engagements. Of course, there is the domestics such as filling up the washer, dishwasher or dryer, cooking or any household chore we do as women. Admittedly, my days are hectic and filled with a lot to do. I don’t have a typical day, as it could change at any point so I am always flexible once I am in the country.

I don’t like the hassle of the city especially in peak times so I do try to have most meetings via Skype as I just save my energy and get more out of my day that way.

I do most of the cooking at home and try my best to always to have it balanced  except for  the regular Jamaican treats like,  fried plantain ,curries, or fried dumplings with Ackee and Salt fish. We always try to eat as a family yet challenging but Sunday is a MUST. Mealtime is when we all really catch up as we all have different schedules. Here I get the real scoop of what’s going on in my teenager’s life at college, friends etc., my toddles shares his antics from nursery and we all just relax and share the love of how much we miss each other during the day. Of course we touch in during the week but Sundays are for offloading you could say.

 

I would love to be in bed by 11 pm but this is rarely achieved, evenings are when I  answer my fan mail and yes I actually do , catch upon social media , my emails and plan if I don’t have  webinar  , meeting or caching session. My toddler is in bed by 8pm, my teenager is a bit more like most and it’s a struggle to get her off her Ipad or snap chat, but there is a rule of no TV in bedrooms at the moment.

 

I find listening to Afrobeat music very calming so it’s my new therapy at the moment and winter evening walks with my son , he loves going for late evening walks.

What do you feel are your biggest achievements?

Since the launch of my book, I have had a few, from being featured on Jamaicans most watched and prestigious TV show “Profile” to being featured in the Financial Times however, I have three great achievements that truly mean the world to me namely: being a mom, graduating with an MBA (considering my background), but also finishing my book and actually seeing it in people’s hands, on the shelves and thankfully the reviews it’s priceless. From the list, being mom and my book are my proudest achievement. My kids mean everything to me. They are the reason I work so hard, I want them to have a better life than I had.

What’s in your handbag?

I carry large handbags always, except on the occasions when I need an evening bag. As a mother there is always, wipes, my diary, my tablet, my book of course, sunshades, business cards and pencil case. There will be mints and my purse always has a cheque I have written to myself for £600,000 that I hope to cash in one day soon.  Something I’ve practiced ever since I read the Secrets.

What are your ambitions in life?

Finding the right balance is a struggle. I am continuously searching for a better balance. I love my children unconditionally and strive to leave a better legacy for them than I was privilege to, sometimes finding a middle point is challenging. I’ve had a number of jobs, some I liked better than others, but I am totally fired up and excited about working for Ava Brown, all my passion is there. Ideally, I want everyone who comes into contact with my work be it my books, talks or workshops to be inspired and motivated to make their lives better. Understanding that the only person that can stand in their way is them. I also intend to have my own TV programme one day as I think there is a message that needs to be communicated to a wider audience through such a medium.

Where do you see yourself in five years’ time?

With a successful business and a household name, my daughter just finishing university and hopefully doing something she enjoys and my son in his last few years of primary education. I would love to have built with the help of some donors a safe home in Jamaica, for children who suffer sexual and other forms of abuse, like I did.

(If relevant) What advice would you give your pre baby self that you now know having had a child?

I have been an overprotective mum until recently, most of that came from my own experiences, so I wanted to protect my kids all the day every hour. It’s been a jolt , but I’ve realised that kids are more resilient than we give them credit for , just let them know how much you love them and be there to support and care for them at each stage of their journey .No two children’s  journeys are the same.

 What advice would you give to someone starting out in your field?

Start writing, get your ideas on paper regardless of how silly you may think it sounds, there is a story in all of us and you are the best person to tell it. There is an audience waiting to hear from you, but if it’s not written how will they hear your voice and understand your message?

Don’t be deflated if no one believes in your dream, the only supporter you need is you and don’t be afraid of criticism and rejection , just keep going the right link will be made at the correct time to believe , support and elevate you.

Finally, happiness is., not having to worry about the bills, being content and able to spend much more time with my kids, family and close friends.  A home in Ireland on a farm with a brook where I can just write.

I am currently working on my new book “Dialogue With Ava Brown “ out Q1 2015, a combination of my blogs and quotes from Bamboo & Fern my first book , as well as the second part of my Biography “Indomitable Spirit” which is due out autumn 2015.  I have just launched my coaching and mentoring programme and doing more speaking engagements which I thoroughly enjoy, as it’s feeding the mind with ideas to change its course of direction. My book is on WHSmith and Waterstones Websites in Europe as well as Amazon, North America Barnes & Nobles and autographed copies are at www.avabrow.org where my other services are outlined, my twitter @avabrown24 and Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/ava.brown.10048

Make contact t have a conversation , I have an open surgery.

 

Abuse In Any Form Is WRONG! Walk Away!

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For many years I have allowed myself to stay in an abusive relationship. I found various reasons although knowingly fooling myself to stay. It’s interesting when you are at a low ebb the things that make you stay in a bad and volatile situation.

For me it was a potpourri of ideals in one sense or so I told myself, ranging from his physical attractiveness (an excuse), then it was the fear of being alone in London. Other times it was what people would say about me rather than the fact that he wasn’t adding up to the expectations and values I know I wanted to see in the man of my dreams. Yet, I stayed for many more years than I should have. I was crippled by my own demons of fear, low self-esteem and cowardice. The ghost of my past that barricaded me each time I attempted to break free , and so like many women and men can testify to same, I ignored the emotional and psychological abuse that were used to control me and I stayed.

I tossed between highs and lows, tears and laughter, the pretense and the sleepless nights while he would cheat, lie and frolic. I carried the weight of his responsibilities for a long time , yet he wanted to be crowned king , given the fattest piece of meat and waited upon hand and foot. Then on day alas! The Penny dropped.

It wasn’t any big thing, like his cheating, his irresponsible behavior or even his untidiness around the home, no it wasn’t. It was one of his regulars, that one trait I hated the most that of his loud shouts, that made me curled up, cried and decided I had had enough. I had one too many shouts, one too many times of feeling scared of his anger and that was it, simple as that. Click! Like the click of a switch. My mum would say that was the straw that broke the camel’s back.

Can you relate to any of this? I certainly hope not, but whilst that is the case there are thousands of people in our communities living and barely coping in abusive situations because they are not strong enough to get up and walk away. For some, it’s the financial support that comes with having a partner, others it’s the company at winter time and let’s face it the UK is cold but is it’s worth the damage? Only you can answer that question from a deep entrenched part of your soul.

We never can grasp or comprehend the reasons people stay in toxic, violent relationships, but we know there are millions globally and sadly that number grows every day.

Some stay out of fear, low self-esteem and self-worth, financial and emotional blackmail and I could go on forever. Yet whatever the reason it is simply not good enough, stop, think and act today! An abuser is a coward and yes I know of women who think that because he doesn’t beat her, it’s not abuse. Let me tell you something emotional abuse is far worse, as the physical oozes and escapes, the emotional doesn’t.

Here are a few telltale signs that a relationship is toxic in my own experience:

 He doesn’t want you to have friends

 Al your friends are bad for you

 He goes through your phone and email

 You are his world

 He has no circles outside of you

 He cannot praise you when you do well

 Everything is a competition

 You carry all the responsibilities yet he wants you to worship him

 He expects you to do all the work on top of it all

 Everyman wants to be with you in his eyes

 He doesn’t want to discuss the issue and ALL must be swept under the carpet

 He uses sex to control you and solves al your problems

 He is like another child and uses emotional blackmail

I wouldn’tay it’s easy to get out of a bad and toxic relationship, but when you are with someone and you feel the void I felt yet you are still there, you are far too cognizant that it’s not good for your or your children.

When you find yourself empty and hollow, tearful and sad but cannot even express it much as you fear hurting his ego then, I suggest you get some help and gradually walk away. Yes it will hurt then, but its best that it hurts for 3 years than you stay 10 years and hurt for that long.

Walk away, work on self and get ready for the person who was meant to love you, but first you have to LOVE YOU as failing that, you can’t love anyone.

Speak to a friend , a family member or write things down, but whatever you do GET OUT NOW and save yourself for the person who will love your healthily.

If you are affecting by anything in this blogpost and would like to talk, please email me info@avabrown.org or share it with someone you feel may benefit.

 

Check out my Black Friday Offers:

https://plus.google.com/110350824892286495977/posts/CwxeEkKT2sc

Don’t Walk Away From Abuse Take It

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For many years I have allowed myself to stay in an abusive relationship. I found various reasons although knowingly fooling myself to stay. It’s interesting when you are at a low ebb the things that make you stay in a bad and volatile situation.

For me it was a potpourri of ideals in one sense or so I told myself, ranging from his physical attractiveness (an excuse), then it was the fear of being alone in London. Other times it was what people would say about me rather than the fact that he wasn’t adding up to the expectations and values I know I wanted to see in the man of my dreams. Yet, I stayed for many more years than I should have. I was crippled by my own demons of fear, low self-esteem and cowardice. The ghost of my past that barricaded me each time I attempted to break free , and so like many women and men can testify to same, I ignored the emotional and psychological abuse that were used to control me and I stayed.

I tossed between highs and lows, tears and laughter, the pretense and the sleepless nights while he would cheat, lie and frolic. I carried the weight of his responsibilities for a long time , yet he wanted to be crowned king , given the fattest piece of meat and waited upon hand and foot. Then on day alas! The Penny dropped.

It wasn’t any big thing, like his cheating, his irresponsible behavior or even his untidiness around the home, no it wasn’t. It was one of his regulars, that one trait I hated the most that of his loud shouts, that made me curled up, cried and decided I had had enough. I had one too many shouts, one too many times of feeling scared of his anger and that was it, simple as that. Click! Like the click of a switch. My mum would say that was the straw that broke the camel’s back.

Can you relate to any of this? I certainly hope not, but whilst that is the case there are thousands of people in our communities living and barely coping in abusive situations because they are not strong enough to get up and walk away. For some, it’s the financial support that comes with having a partner, others it’s the company at winter time and let’s face it the UK is cold but is it’s worth the damage? Only you can answer that question from a deep entrenched part of your soul.

We never can grasp or comprehend the reasons people stay in toxic, violent relationships, but we know there are millions globally and sadly that number grows every day.

Some stay out of fear, low self-esteem and self-worth, financial and emotional blackmail and I could go on forever. Yet whatever the reason it is simply not good enough, stop, think and act today! An abuser is a coward and yes I know of women who think that because he doesn’t beat her, it’s not abuse. Let me tell you something emotional abuse is far worse, as the physical oozes and escapes, the emotional doesn’t.

Here are a few telltale signs that a relationship is toxic in my own experience:

 He doesn’t want you to have friends

 Al your friends are bad for you

 He goes through your phone and email

 You are his world

 He has no circles outside of you

 He cannot praise you when you do well

 Everything is a competition

 You carry all the responsibilities yet he wants you to worship him

 He expects you to do all the work on top of it all

 Everyman wants to be with you in his eyes

 He doesn’t want to discuss the issue and ALL must be swept under the carpet

 He uses sex to control you and solves al your problems

 He is like another child and uses emotional blackmail

I wowouldn’tay it’s easy to get out of a bad and toxic relationship, but when you are with someone and you feel the void I felt yet you are still there, you are far too cognizant that it’s not good for your or your children.

When you find yourself empty and hollow, tearful and sad but cannot even express it much as you fear hurting his ego then, I suggest you get some help and gradually walk away. Yes it will hurt then, but its best that it hurts for 3 years than you stay 10 years and hurt for that long.

Walk away, work on self and get ready for the person who was meant to love you, but first you have to LOVE YOU as failing that, you can’t love anyone.

Speak to a friend , a family member or write things down, but whatever you do GET OUT NOW and save yourself for the person who will love your healthily.

If you are affecting by anything in this blogpost and would like to talk, please email me info@avabrown.org or share it with someone you feel may benefit.

 

Check out my Black Friday Offers:

https://plus.google.com/110350824892286495977/posts/CwxeEkKT2sc

How To Maintain Your Composure in Difficult Times

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How To Maintain Your Composure in  Difficult Times
Don’t Allow Your Emotions to Get in the   Way
 Don’t Take Things Personally
 Keep a Positive Mental Attitude
 Remain Fearless
 Respond Decisively
 Take Accountability
 Act like You Have Been There Before
 
Claim a FREE copy of the audio program
- “How To Get Of The Rut & Change Your Life In 24 Hours Or Less”.

Simple Bites To Keep Us Going!

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Simple Bites To Keep Us Going!

1. Stay focused on the positives instead of the negatives

2. Don’t ever give up.

3. Challenge yourself and try new things every day

4. Each day you should ask yourself if you’re happy.

5. Don’t compare yourself to others and find time to celebrate your little accomplishments

6. The land of familiarity belongs to low achievers

7. If you want to grow dig deep, jump and dig harder

8. Trust yourself

9. Give yourself a chance only you can do that!

10. Walk by faith and not by sight

Dont Be Afraid to Dream Big!

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Dont Be Afraid to Dream Big!

At some points of my life I do feel like I am living my dream and as such I think its best to follow your heart and just dream. Here I share some of the things that helped me over the years. Take whats useful , throw away what’s not.

1. Discover the Awesome Power of a Dream.

2. Your dream must be backed by ACTION.Achievers are dreamers and DOERS.

3. Develop a ‘God Consciousness’

4. DEVELOP YOUR DESIRE to see the dream come to fruition.

5. Develop a Success Consciousness, that you will achieve

your dream one day.

6. Don’t surrender to negative assumptions.

8. Have a dynamic positive attitude to life.

9. Really BELIEVE that things will work out for you.

10. PERSIST

11. Be patient.

12. Be open and flexible in your strategies to achieve your

goals, your dream(s).

13. Review your strategy and progress from time to time.

14. Listen to others, really listen, instead of thinking

what you are going to say next.

15. Never Give Up on the Core of your Dream. Never!

Ask yourself this vital question: What are the alternatives to

NOT dreaming it… and only YOU can kill your grand vision..

WHAT IS YOUR DREAM? DECIDE IT, DECLARE IT, SHARE IT

I have dreamed big why don’t you call me to know how I did it?

07808866870.

Eradicating Negative Self-Talk

Eradicating Negative Self-Talk

If negative self-talk came with an off switch, you could just flip it. But unfortunately for us humans it doesn’t. It takes a plan and some work to tone it down and eventually hopefully eradicate it. I have had my own share of negative thoughts at different stages of my life namely:

 As a child I had negative thoughts of being unworthy and not good enough to even have been born

 As a teenager I felt overly displaced

 As a wife feeling that my husband at the time was far too good for me based on the family he was from and my level of insecurities

 Having moved to London and getting totally confused and regretful of where my life was, in comparison to where I wanted to be

What I have come to understand, is that negative self-talk and thoughts will not help you as a person, instead it robs you of a healthy and fulfilled life. Subsequently, I have shed and turned the switch off a number of years ago. It’s one of the best things I have ever done for my family and I. Ever since I have done that my life has taken a very different path.

Here are four ways I made it happen:

Distance yourself.

When you find yourself having negative thoughts distance yourself and step back. You can’t banish negative self-talk forever, but you can take a step back from it.

Distract yourself.

Get busy when negative thoughts start creeping upon you. Lyubomirsky says. “You can stop that train of thought by focusing on something else.” Try playing music, cooking, get busy and do something you enjoy doing and fully engage your mind. If you give your negative thoughts the third-degree and they could crumble.

Save them for later.

It may sound silly but if you MUST have negative thoughts save them for a nonproductive part of the day. That way , it doesn’t stop you being productive.

Set aside a time of day for negative self-talk. If you hear yourself doubting, blaming, or comparing yourself to others at another time of day, tell yourself you will come back to the conversation later. When the appointed time arrives, your negative thoughts may have lost most of their oomph.

Tell yourself to shut up

When negative self-talk comes up, tell it to shut up as you would if someone said something rude to you. Now to be honest, shut up isn’t how I would react to anyone but it’s a language many understand. Therefore, treat your negative self-thought as you would an enemy.

I will be the first to say it isn’t instantaneous, but as they say repetition makes learning easier and if you repeat these steps above the recurrence may get less.

Until next time keep positive thoughts.

This is Ava Brown signing off for now.

If you want my help in eradicating negative thoughts drop me an email at info@avabrown.org

Support Where is it ?

Support where is it ?

They say it takes a village to grow a child and I am sure it takes a Village to grow a business. As someone who has just embarked on my own business, I have been given the cold watery baptism of the fact that, the support you expect isn’t always there or from the people you expect it from.

Admittedly a hard tablet to swallow, but in business reality has to be faced quickly if you want to affect the bottom line, that of profitability.

Does it mean that you shed the people who are in your camp, who you expect to support you? Or do you refocus and question if you are targeting the right people and or community?

Sometimes we start out a bit uncertain about who we are targeting and who our products are most suitable for. Indeed, if you are like me, then you would expect the people close to you to  be your first set of supporters. If you are a baker , the expected support will be friends and families to order birthday, anniversary and special occasions cakes etc. However, I am certain many of us have had a rude awakening to this misconception. We have been thrown into the freezing Atlantic Ocean, and left to drown if our businesses were to thrive from this support we expect predominantly from OUR communities.

Instead , the community will almost abandon you and leave you to question at points,  your own capabilities, the correctness of the business venture and even your sanity.

STOP!

Don’t let them deter you, keep focus on what why you started the business in the first place.

Was it because of those people? I don’t think so, so why then will you allow them to make you feel defeated?

Instead!

Regroup, identity who your target audience is
Don’texpect support from the people who you call friends and family. If they support you say thanks, but don’t expect anything.
Manage your own expectations, have a contingency plan if you were depending on them to be your main source.
Start networking in different circles especially where your target audience visits.
Keep your business venture away from the discussions, not everyone who says “well done, I am so proud of you” truly means it.
Take time out to re-evaluate the journey you are on frequently.
Rip down the model and start again in the intangible sense.
Continue to believe on the project at hand and don’t forget it was your dream, only you can keep it alive.

The overall message here is that you should understand that your village doesn’t always support your business, instead you will have to create a village with its main focus being that of supporting your business.

As George M Adams says “There are high spots in all of our lives and most of them have come about through encouragement from someone else. I don’t care how great, how famous or successful a man or woman may be, each hungers for applause. “

 

Let’s have the conversation about supporting each other’s business. Drop me an email at info@avabrown.org

Ava Brown MBA, BBA, Dip. Ed.| Trainer, Speaker & Consultant | Author of Bamboo & Fern

Tel:  078 0886 6870 | Email: info@avabrown.org | Web: www.avabrown.org