James Hauenstein's Blog, page 52

Looking At This Blog With A Cellphone

The list of"Home"and the"Pull Down Arrows"you see,right under the heading,Two Buck Howie,when you you look at myBlogwith a cell phone,are some of the best written material I have.You should try one of the pull downsand take a look once in awhile!  The first one is a link to purchase my eBook calledNo Return Address.The second"Home"and"Pull Down"has links to67flash fictionand short stories I've written.The third has13 Linksto poetry.The fourth hasLinksto my weekly serial I wrote calledThe Man From Mars.  The fifth has links to the8 Chaptersof myNovelettecalledWhy Should I die?The sixth hasTrue Life Storieswhich have happened to me over the years.The seventhand final "Home"with a"Pull Down"is the"Hauenstein Philosophy."When I started thisBlogI set it up for people to comeand read it on their computer.Unfortunately,Google's Blogspotdoesn't let you design how yourBloglooks on a cell phone!So,to really capture the feel of myBlog,I do suggest you take a look at it on a tabletor a computer once in awhile.You will be surprised to find out that I also have10 Music Videoson myBlogwhich the cell phone version doesn't show you at all!
This is,Always Trying To Figure Out Ways For You To Have A Better Visual Experience
And Reading Experience With My Blog,Jim Hauenstein,
And,
“My blog is a collection of answers people don’t want to hear to questions they didn’t ask.”
-  Sebastyne Young -
That is my story and I am sticking to it! Like what you are reading?Sign up as a Follower,or Set up my Blogas your Homepageon your Web-browser,or Leave a Comment,or a Suggestion,and I will answer you in a Post.
Thanks for reading.
If you are reading this on aCell-Phone,you will see aLinkon the bottom of the page,
after all the headlines of stories
where it says;
View Web Version. To truly get the full benefit of myBlog,I suggest you view the web version.You will just have to expand the page to be able to read it on a cellphone.

Thanks again.

Again I Am Re-Posting

Since I am on vacation
and don't have my computer with me,
I am
Re-Posting
this important message!

*****
I have been asking everyone I know if they will please sign up as aFolloweron myBlogso I can showPublishersI have a followingand will be able to sell my manuscript.ButBloggerdoesn't make it easy for anyone.If,like almost everyone today,you are looking at thisPoston your phone,they make it seem impossible.I do appreciate everyone trying to sign up thoughand I appreciate everyone still coming back daily to read what I have to say on myBlog.Please don't get frustrated.The problem,when looking on your phone is,Bloggeruses what is called theMobile Versionof a website.
What that does is,it takes away all the extra designs,headings,thrills,and frills I am able to put on theWeb Version.This lets theMobile Versionload faster onto your phoneand lets you see,what they consider the important content in a larger font size.TheWeb Versionis always loaded in the tiniest of fonts so they can show the whole webpage.Unfortunately,the only way to sign up as aFolloweris to look at theWeb Version.The best way of signing up as aFolloweris to open up whicheverBrowseryou like to use.LikeInternet Explorer,Edge,Chrome,Mozilla Firefox,Opera,and so on.If yourHomepageisn'tGoogle.comgo to that page.If you already have aGmail Account,sign in.If not,you will have to create one.Once you have done that,in the search box type inTwo Buck Howieand a link to myBlogwill pop up.Press on that link.Then you will see theMobile Versionof myBlog.Near the bottom you will see where it saysView Web Version.
[image error]
 Click on that linkand of course theWeb Versionwill load.Then,on the right hand side,under the heading"Followers,"you will see near the top a blue link titledFollow.Press on thisand you will be able to say yes to be the nextFollower!See howBloggermakes it almost impossible for most people to sign up!But please,take the time to do soand you will be helping me out tremendously.I'm trying to figure out a way to reward the people who do.Right now I'm thinking a free copy of my book to the first 50Followerswhen it comes out.If I am able to convince aPublisherthat I have enoughFollowersto publish it.
I want to thank
Delbert Hauenstein,
Kayla Littmann,
Andrew Victor Bano,
Wild Litt Litt,
and
Sean Russell
for signing up as my new
Followers!
This is,Thank You Once Again,Jim Hauenstein,
And,

“I still encourage anyone who feels at all compelled to write to do so. I just try to warn people who hope to get published that publication is not all it is cracked up to be. But writing is. Writing has so much to give, so much to teach, so many surprises. That thing you had to force yourself to do, the actual act of writing, turns out to be the best part. The act of writing turns out to be its own reward.”
- Anne Lamott -


That is my story and I am sticking to it! Like what you are reading?Sign up as a Follower,or Set up my Blogas your Homepageon your Web-browser,or Leave a Comment,or a Suggestion,and I will answer you in a Post.
Thanks for reading.
If you are reading this on aCell-Phone,you will see aLinkon the bottom of the page,
after all the headlines of stories
where it says;
View Web Version.To truly get the full benefit of myBlog,I suggest you view the web version.You will just have to expand the page to be able to read it.
Thanks Again.

Still On Vacation

Still on vacation but I am so delighted that so many readers keep coming back each day to read some of my olderPosts,Poetry,Flash Fiction,Short Stories,and watch myMusic Videos.Thank you so much.I will still be away from a computer untilAugust 14th.Nobody said this vacation stuff was going to be easy.
That is my story and I am sticking to it!
Like what you are reading?
Sign up as a Follower,or Set up my Blogas your Homepageon your Web-browser,or Leave a Comment,or a Suggestion,and I will answer you in a Post.
Thanks for reading.
If you are reading this on aCell-Phone,below this story you will see aLinkwhere it says;View Web Version.To truly get the full benefit of myBlog,I suggest you view the web version.You will just have to expand the page to be able to read it on a cellphone.
Thanks again.

I Am On Vacation

It is time for a vacation!First,I am headed toSan Antonio! Next I am going toShreveport, Louisiana! Then there will be a stop atRichmond, Virginia! Finally,Marshfield, Wisconsin! Before traveling back to sunnyCalifornia.When I get toWisconsinI will try to say hi to everyone if I can,but this trip is all about seeing some of myKids,Grandchildren,Siblings,and myFather.During the 3 months that I will be gone I will try to write as much as I can.Read some of myShort Stories & Flash Fictionto keep yourself entertained in the mean timeand I will beRe-Postinga lot of my older stuff that I feel is relevant.
This is,Letting All The Weirdos Who Know Where I Live That My House Will Not be Vacant,I Am Going On This Trip With My GrandsonAnd Everyone Else Is Staying HomeJim Hauenstein,
And,
“When all else fails, take a vacation.”
- Betty Williams - 
That is my story and I am sticking to it!

Like what you are reading?
Sign up as a Follower,or Set up my Blogas your Homepageon your Web-browser,or Leave a Comment,or a Suggestion,and I will answer you in a Post.
Thanks for reading.
If you are reading this on aCell-Phone,below this story you will see aLinkwhere it says;View Web Version.To truly get the full benefit of myBlog,I suggest you view the web version.You will just have to expand the page to be able to read it on a cellphone.
Thanks again.

How To Improve Your Fitness Score

Well first,I want to start out by exposing some of you older folks out there.Unless you are one of those power walkers,joggers,or fitness geeks under the age of 45,you probably didn't buy your fitness watch yourself.It was given to you by your kidsor somebody else who loves you.They bought it because you don't exercise like you used to.The person who gave it to you says they will be coming back each week to check your progress.That is when you go out to buy a catand a dog.To improve your step count you put your fitness watch on your dog.Then to track your sleep cycles you put it on your cat.Fitbit Users Are Finding Creative Ways to Cheat | Fortune.comThen the person who is keeping an eye on you will come overand complement you on your outstanding progress!And you just smile.Of course,I would never do that myself.I just told my kids I lost itand stuffed deep inside a drawer!
This is,1, 2, 3, Push-upsThat's Enough For TonightJim Hauenstein,
And,
"Exercise is a dirty word. Every time I hear it I wash my mouth out with chocolate."- Charles Schulz -

That is my story and I am sticking to it! Like what you are reading?Sign up as a Follower,or Set up my Blogas your Homepageon your Web-browser,or Leave a Comment,or a Suggestion,and I will answer you in a Post.
Thanks for reading.
If you are reading this on aCell-Phone,you will see aLinkon the bottom of the page,
after all the headlines of stories
where it says;
View Web Version.To truly get the full benefit of myBlog,I suggest you view the web version.You will just have to expand the page to be able to read it on a cellphone.
Thanks Again.

San Diego Comic Con Is Coming Back To Town And You Should Be Afraid

Here is a
True
story that happened to me during the
San Diego Comic-Con
around
July 2016
called
Fighting Off Genetically Engineered Mutants Who Are Turtles

*****
It was a close one todayBoys and Girls.You could be asking yourself right now,
"What Was?"Could it be,that I am talking about the overdueEarthquake that all the notedSeismologist have predicted forCalifornia?Which will probably make my back yard,Beach Front Property?Or,could it be,that I am talking about the hazards of living in aTrailer Park?
Right in the smack dab middle ofTornado Alley.
What I believe happened to me,that is to say,if my instincts haven't failed me yet,and I'm pretty sure they haven't,
thatAliens,from anotherPlanet,had spotted me driving around townand have decided that I am a really good specimen to probe!Of course,if that were truly the case,I was probably in a high speed chase with theAliens,where I was driving myMercedes,and theAlienswere buzzing overhead in aFlying Saucer!Then I would have had to fight off the genetically engineeredMutants
before being captured by theSlave Robotsof theWarlord Proxima,from the Star system,Alpha Centauri.He used hisAmnesia-Sleep-Inducing-Where-Did-I-Wake-Up-From-This-Morning-Death-Rayon all of the unsuspecting groups of people,who were innocently attending some kind ofComic-Conat theConvention Center
in
San Diego.The Cosplayers, had gathered around our little ferocious melee,probably thinking we are making a independent film for the opening day ofComic-Con.Well,
I can't confirm nor deny that the last little tidbit of news is true because the warlord,Proxima,shot me himself with theA.S.I.W.D.I.W.U.T.M.-Death-Ray!He is a good shot too!I nary felt a thing.If you were here,right now,inSan Diego,you would not believe your eyes.You would know my warnings are serious by seeing all the different types ofAliensroaming the streets!Here are a couple of the really ugly ones. Well,Boys and Girls,I told you it was a close one.It was,really.Because I Could Have Been Captured By One Of These Ugly Looking Aliens,Flown To Their Home Planet In Their Flying Spaceship,Probably To Be Probe!
This is,Safe
And Sound Now In My Own Little World,Jim Hauenstein,
And,
“Cosplay. Why you just said the magic word!”
 - Danika Stone, -
Don't Call Me A Chicken!I could have been probe!


That is my story and I am sticking to it! Like what you are reading?Sign up as a Follower,or Set up my Blogas your Homepageon your Web-browser,or Leave a Comment,or a Suggestion,and I will answer you in a Post.
Thanks for reading.
If you are reading this on aCell-Phone,you will see aLinkon the bottom of the page,
after all the headlines of stories
where it says;
View Web Version.To truly get the full benefit of myBlog,I suggest you view the web version.You will just have to expand the page to be able to read it.

Thanks Again.

Re-Posting

Since I am on vacation
and don't have my computer with me,
I am
Re-Posting
an important message!

*****
I have been asking everyone I know if they will please sign up as aFolloweron myBlogso I can showPublishersI have a followingand will be able to sell my manuscript.ButBloggerdoesn't make it easy for anyone.If,like almost everyone today,you are looking at thisPoston your phone,they make it seem impossible.I do appreciate everyone trying to sign up thoughand I appreciate everyone still coming back daily to read what I have to say on myBlog.Please don't get frustrated.The problem,when looking on your phone is,Bloggeruses what is called theMobile Versionof a website.
What that does is,it takes away all the extra designs,headings,thrills,and frills I am able to put on theWeb Version.This lets theMobile Versionload faster onto your phoneand lets you see,what they consider the important content in a larger font size.TheWeb Versionis always loaded in the tiniest of fonts so they can show the whole webpage.Unfortunately,the only way to sign up as aFolloweris to look at theWeb Version.The best way of signing up as aFolloweris to open up whicheverBrowseryou like to use.LikeInternet Explorer,Edge,Chrome,Mozilla Firefox,Opera,and so on.If yourHomepageisn'tGoogle.comgo to that page.If you already have aGmail Account,sign in.If not,you will have to create one.Once you have done that,in the search box type inTwo Buck Howieand a link to myBlogwill pop up.Press on that link.Then you will see theMobile Versionof myBlog.Near the bottom you will see where it saysView Web Version.
[image error]
 Click on that linkand of course theWeb Versionwill load.Then,on the right hand side,under the heading"Followers,"you will see near the top a blue link titledFollow.Press on thisand you will be able to say yes to be the nextFollower!See howBloggermakes it almost impossible for most people to sign up!But please,take the time to do soand you will be helping me out tremendously.I'm trying to figure out a way to reward the people who do.Right now I'm thinking a free copy of my book to the first 50Followerswhen it comes out.If I am able to convince aPublisherthat I have enoughFollowersto publish it.
I want to thank
Delbert Hauenstein,
Kayla Littmann,
Andrew Victor Bano,
Wild Litt Litt,
and
Sean Russell
for signing up as my new
Followers!
This is,Thank You Once Again,Jim Hauenstein,
And,

“I still encourage anyone who feels at all compelled to write to do so. I just try to warn people who hope to get published that publication is not all it is cracked up to be. But writing is. Writing has so much to give, so much to teach, so many surprises. That thing you had to force yourself to do, the actual act of writing, turns out to be the best part. The act of writing turns out to be its own reward.”
- Anne Lamott -


That is my story and I am sticking to it! Like what you are reading?Sign up as a Follower,or Set up my Blogas your Homepageon your Web-browser,or Leave a Comment,or a Suggestion,and I will answer you in a Post.
Thanks for reading.
If you are reading this on aCell-Phone,you will see aLinkon the bottom of the page,
after all the headlines of stories
where it says;
View Web Version.To truly get the full benefit of myBlog,I suggest you view the web version.You will just have to expand the page to be able to read it.
Thanks Again.

The 5 Best Posts Of The Month Of May 2019!

I am still on vacation so I have to do thisPostas fast as I can.You see,I need to pay attention to my familyand not sit on the computer for hours.So,here areThe 5 Best Posts Of The Month Of May, 2019!The Fifth Best Post Of The Month Of May, 2019 Is;Mar's Boarding PassThis is the second time I will have my name on a chip sent to Mars on one of NASA's rovers. This time I hope I have given everyone enough warning so you too can have your name sent to Mars.The Fourth Best Post Of The Month Of May Is;Giving Thanks On Memorial Day To The Real Heroes
One of my pet peeves where Sports Figures and Announcers talk about going to war and being in a battle when all they are doing is playing a game.The Third Best Post Of The Month Is;Just My OpinionWhere people who are sent to prison should not be allowed to pull scams while incarcerated. Like Bernard Madoff. He has cornered the Hot Chocolate market while in prison. Also, why do they have so much freedom when they are criminals?The Second Best Post Is;It Was SurrealThe true story of when my friend Brian and I got into a bar fight and in the midst of it the song "A Ballroom Blitz" came on!The Number One Best Post Of The Month Of May, 2019 Is;The Moving Mona LisaThe story about how computer programmers can make any picture act as if it is alive and moving. The part I hate the most? They gave the Mona Lisa eyebrows!There you have it.
Another great month of stories.

This is,
Back To My Gin
and Tonic,
Jim Hauenstein,

And,

"No man needs a vacation so much as the the man who has just had one."- Elbert Hubbard -

That is my story and I am sticking to it!

Like what you are reading?
Sign up as a Follower,or Set up my Blogas your Homepageon your Web-browser,or Leave a Comment,or a Suggestion,and I will answer you in a Post.
Thanks for reading.
If you are reading this on aCell-Phone,below this story you will see aLinkwhere it says;View Web Version.To truly get the full benefit of myBlog,I suggest you view the web version.You will just have to expand the page to be able to read it on a cellphone.
Thanks again.

Since I am on vacation,I thought I wouldRe-Posta story fr...

Since I am on vacation,
I thought I would
Re-Post
a story from the last time I ended up in
Wisconsin
while on vacation.
From
July 17th, 2016
my
Post
called
Rock Star Syndrome

*****
This is how my train of thought goes.In myPostfrom a couple of days ago calledI'm Back,I talked about my"Glory Days"with some of myBand Matesfrom years gone by.How I was invited byThe ProfessorfromBowie State University in Maryland,to participate in an impromptu jam sessionbut was unable to go because of family obligations.This got me to thinking about how it felt to be on stage in front of any size crowd.The so calledRock Star Syndrome.That got me to thinking about a time in my life where I felt like aRock Starfor the very last time.During the 1990's I owned season tickets to theSan Diego Chargersfootball team.On one occasion I took my wife.Before the game started,The Marine Corps fromCamp Pendleton were outside the stadium demonstrating equipmentand showing off some of the larger vehicles of war. Just inside the entrance to the stadium,in the common area,there stood aTank. It was guarded byfive or sixMarines.Luckily for me,they recognized me from working on the base.They started yelling,"Hey, there's Jim. Hi Jim!"They wavedand yelledand I waved back.All around the area people were staring at me wondering who I was.Was I a celebrity,a person of prominence,or maybe aRock Star?It was crowded too!People stared at meand talked about me all the while I was walking to my seat.It was the last time that I felt like aRock Star!Thank youUnited States Marines!
This is,I Wouldn't Tell You This Story If It Wasn't True,Jim Hauenstein,
And,
"Having rock-star problems may be the closest I ever get to being an actual rock star." - Cassandra Clare, -

That is my story and I am sticking to it!

Like what you are reading?
Sign up as a Follower,or Set up my Blogas your Homepageon your Web-browser,or Leave a Comment,or a Suggestion,and I will answer you in a Post.
Thanks for reading.
If you are reading this on aCell-Phone,below this story you will see aLinkwhere it says;View Web Version.To truly get the full benefit of myBlog,I suggest you view the web version.You will just have to expand the page to be able to read it on a cellphone.
Thanks again.


I saw this was on a Highway sign in Oklahoma while on the way home;

"Blinkers, the original instant messaging!"

A Quick Heads Up

It is time for a vacation!First,I am headed toSan Antonio! Next I am going toShreveport, Louisiana! Then there will be a stop atRichmond, Virginia! Finally,Marshfield, Wisconsin! Before traveling back to sunnyCalifornia.When I get toWisconsinI will try to say hi to everyone if I can,but this trip is all about seeing some of myKids,Grandchildren,Siblings,and myFather.During the 3 months that I will be gone I will try to write as much as I can.Read some of myShort Stories & Flash Fictionto keep yourself entertained in the mean timeand I will beRe-Postinga lot of my older stuff that I feel is relevant.
This is,Letting All The Weirdos Who Know Where I Live That My House Will Not be Vacant,I Am Going On This Trip With My GrandsonAnd Everyone Else Is Staying HomeJim Hauenstein,
And,
“When all else fails, take a vacation.”
- Betty Williams - 
That is my story and I am sticking to it!

Like what you are reading?
Sign up as a Follower,or Set up my Blogas your Homepageon your Web-browser,or Leave a Comment,or a Suggestion,and I will answer you in a Post.
Thanks for reading.
If you are reading this on aCell-Phone,below this story you will see aLinkwhere it says;View Web Version.To truly get the full benefit of myBlog,I suggest you view the web version.You will just have to expand the page to be able to read it on a cellphone.
Thanks again.