Chris Rodell's Blog, page 37

Being upfront about my behind procedure

(690 words)



Let’s today start with the end: Everything’s fine. No concerns or additional needs to undergo the procedure again.



I wanted to get that out of the way right up front because the end is a good place to start when you’re talking about the cringe-inducing indignities of what I’ll euphemistically call “the procedure.”



It’s recommended for every man or woman once their

Staying at the Watergate Hotel in '02

(636 words)



I have a feeling younger generations and less aware adults will be surprised to learn you can stay at the Watergate. Rooms start at $467.



We stayed there in 2002.



For free!



I did a travel story about the 30th anniversary of the Watergate break-in. It ran in about 10 newspapers, including here in this link thoughtfully preserved by the San Francisco Chronicle.



I

Comey, 6'8", and looming even larger

(595 words)



Beltway pundits were in a typical tizzy Sunday after James Comey was spotted at a  Broadway performance about a lesbian cartoonist. It was his first public outing since being unceremoniously fired.



They wanted to know if he was signaling he was aligning with leftist forces or if maybe it was time for Mike Pence to begin taking steps to pray away a rash outburst of Broadway

The human joys of running really fast

(621 words)



I’m on record as saying I have the same interest in learning speed reading as I do speed sex. Both activities are something to savor.



The declaration is contrary to my typical outlook. See, I yearn to go really fast. Like cheetah fast.



Not in a car or a plane, circumstances so grindingly routine they’re practically pedestrian.



I’m talking about the human exhilaration

"Founder" Ray Kroc & my abiding burger love

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I was a guest at a social function at an area restaurant when a fellow conversant mentioned she was a vegan. She wasn’t belligerent or disdainful of my carnivore customs so I didn’t feel an urge to bop her on the head with a nearby salami. 



Plus, it gave me the opportunity to use one of my favorite lines without it appearing rehearsed.



“I admire your discipline and your

A B*L*O*G on M*A*S*H

(819 words)



I made one of those bone-headed mistakes last weekend that will now haunt my nearly every day for the rest of my run. What did I do?



I googled Gary Burghoff.



Now, I knew better. The less you know about any performer the better. Just enjoy their art for what it is. 



But I’m on a bit of a M*A*S*H resurgence. AMC has been running hours and hours of it and I often click

Speaking in Mrs. Rogers' Neighborhood

(794 words)



It’s been said whenever Sean Spicer takes the podium he is speaking to an audience of one, President Donald Trump. 



I now know the feeling.



I was invited to speak to a Latrobe women’s social club at DeNunzio’s in The Arnold Palmer Regional Airport. What’s the only thing that could make it feel more hometown Latrobe than that?



Mrs. Fred Rogers would be attending.



Now

Advice for dealing with people in bad moods

(613 words)



I was in a lousy mood Sunday. I’d allowed the holy blessing of dealing with my mother’s dementia to feel momentarily burdensome, I was fatigued by persistent professional failings and, yeah, I’d once again lost the stupid lawn mowing challenge.



So I was in a bad mood.



Then it got worse.



What happened?



My 16-year-old daughter asked, “So why are you in such a bad mood

I lose this year's annual grass cutting contest

(675 words)



Spring is when Mother Nature puts on her makeup, all purple, scarlet, pink and green. But the dominant color at my yard Sunday was yellow. Like a chicken.



Or a really big man peep.



I cut the grass — and it wasn’t even waist high. 



Regular readers are aware of my annual competition with my old buddy Paul to see which of us can be the last to cut our respective lawns.

Tweets of the Month (again)!

My friend Bryan Henry took this and a bunch of other snazzies at the Tin Lizzy nearly two years ago. I remain so pleased with them I hope I never age lest my pictures begin to appear fraudulent. Thanks for, reading, sharing, commenting and caring. You can find tweets at 8Days2Amish. 





• Reading newspapers online is to actual reading what phone sex is to lovemaking. Gone is the soul, the