Leila Marie Lawler's Blog, page 62

{bits & pieces}

The weekly “little of this, little of that” feature here at Like Mother, Like Daughter!

 

Fall in New Hampshire. It’s that smell in the air, and the warm evening sun coming through the orange leaves, and the crisp winds, and the chilly nights and mornings, and the new light that shines down into the apartment in the afternoon thanks to slightly thinner foliage…

I would say you should come visit, but we’re suddenly feeling all booked up until the holidays! (Yes, you! EVERYONE! I just want all the world to be here and experience this with us!) It’s suddenly here and going too fast.

But we did get out apple picking last weekend with some new friends.

Here, Finnabee is being indulged as she wants to keep exploring down the row but Daddy is caught in conversation and Mommy has plopped down to nurse the baby (but has a camera at the ready):

The orchard was so lovely that we (the kids and I) went back during the week with some other friends! When it comes with an awesome play yard (including swings and a sandpit), rolling views of all the surrounding mountain peaks, and the weather is fine, the orchard on the top of the hill certainly is the place to be!

 

This week’s links! (Just a reminder: if you’re reading this page on the Home page, it will be more difficult to navigate than if you click on the title and read it on its unique page. The bullet formation just doesn’t want to come through on the Home page, for reasons mysterious to us.)

 

I have two top picks this week.

Stop Googling. Let’s Talk. from the NYTimes. The author identifies the negative, unintended consequences of “personal devices” with regard to conversation and other aspects of human flourishing. What makes this a more refreshing read than the average luddite-esque-rant (as much as I enjoy the genre) is that she also makes indications for how we might respond constructively and keep our technologies in check.From the article:  “Studies of conversation both in the laboratory and in natural settings show that when two people are talking, the mere presence of a phone on a table between them or in the periphery of their vision changes both what they talk about and the degree of connection they feel. People keep the conversation on topics where they won’t mind being interrupted. They don’t feel as invested in each other. Even a silent phone disconnects us.”


My Dealings are Higher than Your Dealings. Do you ever have that feeling that the Gospel passage for the day was surprisingly fitting? Or that the Old Testament readings this week seemed to track exactly what you were going through? It seems so silly now that I’ve read this piece, but it honestly hadn’t occurred to me before that there would be an over-arching term for this, as of course it is not coincidental: liturgical providence of God. Highly recommended especially if you are on tenterhooks regarding the current Synod.

 

Moms, Babies, and Childhood Development (if this has been a theme with me recently, I guess that just reflects where I’m at in life and what my reading tends to be!)

My friend Moira must know that I feel strongly about the issue of post-partum care, since she rightly predicted that I’d enjoy reading this piece on Creating Your Babymoon. Mind you, this woman’s perspective is woo-hoo-hippy-dippy (her words), but I admit that I am right there with her as far as stressing the need to rest (read: in bed) and be nourished; and she has a lot of practical advice.

 

(Related to the “Googling” article, above) I love that she notes that just gazing at the newborn baby is so important. I might be biased, but I think we could all benefit from more baby-gazing in our lives. Babies are just endlessly fascinating — open to the world, so innocent, so newly alive, changing every moment — that they hold our gaze more than the average grown-up person does. One more reason, in my book, to toss away the screen when there’s a baby in arms (it’s a goal of mine, at least – not one that I’ve been 100% successful at so far!).

 

Speaking of new babies, I am loving this new term: breastsleeping. It’s what many of us are doing and need to feel more confident about, because it is, indeed, good for us and the baby.

 

My Facebook friends have been passing this around for the past few weeks, and I finally got around to reading it. File away under “just let your kids play and they will learn!” aka “The American model of Kindergarten is bonkers!” The Joyful, Illiterate Kindergarteners of Finland.

 

Miscellaneous

An enormous and exquisitely organized new archive of photos from the Great Depression and WWII. You can search by time period, location, and photographer. Check it out on Yale’s Photogrammar.

 

A little while ago, when I posed a question about how to handle my cloth diapers, a few of you recommended that I check out Fluff Love University. Just want to pass it on now; I am actually a little overwhelmed at the depth and breadth of the informativeness of this site. Definitely the top standard of information for anyone using cloth! Thank you for pointing me in that direction, dear readers!


Today is the feast of St. Francis Borgia. Enjoy the holiday weekend!


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{pretty, happy, funny, real}

~ Capturing the context of contentment in everyday life ~

Every Thursday, here at Like Mother, Like Daughter!

The winner of The Way of Beauty giveaway is Donna Marie! Congratulations Donna Marie — look for an email for us about how to get your hands on your new book! Thank you to everyone for your lovely comments.

{pretty}

(That’s sidewalk chalk, not a black eye…)

We are so. excited. about the approach of fall here. I only see two highs in the 90s in my 10-day forecast, and it’s cooling off at night — down to 60, and below!

I feel about these days the way I felt for most of my life about the first days of spring. It’s like rediscovering the world after being cooped up inside for months — but instead of being huddled around the wood stove all winter, we’ve been hiding from the heat and humidity in the air conditioned house.

How did people even live in the southwest before a/c? How did they keep their babies cool? Were they really just that much tougher than I am?

{happy}

Speaking of the weather not being scorching hot, we have this adorable little lion sleeper that my kids have each put on at least long enough to take some pretty darn cute photos. Luckily, it cooled off enough to be able to justify dressing Eleanor up before she’s decidedly too big (it’s size 0-3 months, and she’s six months and counting now! But not as tall as her big siblings, or we’d really have missed the boat on this one, I think).

You can see a half-as-old Molly As Lion in this post here, which also includes a side-by-side comparison of Lion Molly and (an even younger) Lion Pippo.

You know, cute babies, sibling comparisons, outfits with ears… if you like that sort of thing.

{funny}

“We’re pretending to plant the stick.”

They plopped down on the blanket with the baby, and all three of them watched entranced as their dad changed a flat tire. (We’re filing that part under {real}…)

And, for good measure, let’s just throw in one of Molly’s recent looks she pulled together from things she can reach on Mama’s dresser (in this case, a handful of headbands).

(Note to self: move EVERYTHING higher up.)

{real}

This is one of those “where I blog” photos, except it’s more like, “how I get anything done on the computer, ever.” I’m sitting on the floor, because the baby is playing on a blanket next to me. The laundry hamper is pulled out of the bedroom so that if the baby ever goes to sleep, the next load won’t be trapped in there with her. (Nothing thwarts a mom’s productive naptime like having the chores in the same room as the napper…)

And of course, a glass of iced tea, because I am my mother’s daughter.

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My secret to cleaning cast iron pans the old-fashioned way.

You know that I try to give “value added” around here. If I thought that the advice you got on other sites was sound, I wouldn’t bother giving you my take. But I don’t. I think the posts I’ve seen about cleaning your cast iron are written by people who are too young to remember the right way to do it. I’m not even that old!

I blame the sudden onset, back when I was a young bride, of nonstick cookware.

Nonstick brings along with it a set of kitchen utensils that are not really good for anything other than… cleaning nonstick. And those kinds of pans are very persnickety about how you take care of them. If you have nonstick, you begin to look at all your cookware as impossibly delicate, easily scratched, and doomed to ultimate failure… and the trash can. On top of how high-maintenance nonstick is, there’s no way it can be good for you as it burns the coating off right under your nose.

Cast iron is… cast iron. You are not going to harm it. It is not going to harm you.

With cast iron, there are two issues: Seasoning and cleaning.

For the deep scientific background and some good information on your cast iron pans, I suggest that you read this informative post.

I will try to give you the simple version!

 

Just keep these points in mind:

You can’t season your pan with cooking oil, no matter what the “experts” say.


You can’t season, or clean cast iron in a way that retains the seasoning, without a steel scouring pad and a stainless steel spatula. Yes, cast iron will often act quite nonstick. But the day will come when you will fry up a batch of sausage and your pan is going to have some cooked-on, burnt-up drippings.

 

Please don’t face this eventuality with a dumb sponge and silicone spatula that are meant for the Teflon. (For that matter, you will need the steel wool and metal spatula for your regular stainless pans after the pear sauce over-simmers et cetera.)

(This kind of thing will take a million hours with the sponge and lots of running water — or a quick pass with the spatula and steel scrubber.)

You don’t need rubber gloves — although if you usually use them it’s fine. But you don’t need them.


You don’t need tongs.


You don’t need salt (I’m editing to add, having remembered after someone commented). You can use salt or even sand because you are trying to abrade, but it’s not efficient.


A plastic scrubber will do you no good.


You don’t need but one paper towel (you could use a rag but I strongly feel that paper towels have their uses and this is one of them).

Personally, and slightly but not fatally opposed to the link I gave you, I do use bacon fat or lard if I have it. The main point is that whatever you use has to have a very high burn temp. Cooking oils do not.

To season, scrub your unseasoned pan (the one you picked up at a yard sale or thrift store for nothing — a new pan usually comes seasoned already) with the steel scouring pad. Wash it with soap (the last time you’ll ever do this) and dry. Warm it on the stove. Then rub all over with bacon grease, lard, or flax oil — you can use a paper towel to do this — and then wipe off the grease with other side of the same paper towel.

Heat up your oven (Sheryl Canter in that link above says 500º), and stick the pan in for a good long time — an hour. Or put it on the stove on medium heat for a while — 15 minutes. Don’t worry. It will be seasoned. If you want a true durable seasoning that won’t wear off, follow her directions carefully. If you are fine with doing it every once in a while, follow mine. Eventually the seasoning will build up, although I find that cooking tomato sauce and other acid foods wears it off, so I do re-season mine occasionally.

Now it’s seasoned.

So I’m going to give you the quick tutorial on how to clean those pans, because once you learn it, you will love using them.

Using your trusty spatula, (and occasionally a stainless steel spoon for corners), scrape off all the cooked on bits in your pan — while running the water as hot as you can stand it. (For this you might need gloves, but the spatula keeps your hands out of the hot water.)

Now use the steel wool.

Remember, hot water only. No soap. Trust me. That is all you need.

You just have to accept that your pan will be conceptually greasy, although you will see that between the hot water and…

 

… the subsequent wiping with a paper towel, the pan will be clean.

Now put it on your stove — it needs to be dry. A burner that has been hot (on an electric stove) or a burner set on low (on a gas one) will do the trick. Leave it there until completely dry.

It’s clean.

That’s it! It’s really so simple. The trick and secret is to accept that using soap is not the only way to get something clean! And in the case of cast iron, will just not work. Try this method and see what you think!

Don’t forget our giveaway, still going on, of David Clayton’s The Way of Beauty: Liturgy, Education, and Inspiration for Family, School, and College! Click here to leave a comment.

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A giveaway of The Way of Beauty with your {bits & pieces}!

The regular “little of this, little of that” feature here at Like Mother, Like Daughter!

I have one million things to tell you and share with you! Links galore — and a giveaway!

Real quick — I will be in Houston tomorrow at Our Lady of Walsingham (also next week) and at Prince of Peace on Wednesday evening. All the info is on the speaking page. Please come and say hi! I can sign your book if you like!

At last I am getting around to offering this marvelous book to you as a giveaway!

My bad for not doing it sooner.

You know how I’m always telling you to read read read about education? Well, this is one of the books you should read, right up there with John Senior, John Taylor Gatto, Charlotte Mason, and all those other ones that make your mind explode with that wonderful “aha!” feeling that you finally get it, that you’re getting somewhere and not just blinding buying curriculum.

As you may or may not know, David Clayton is my co-author for The Little Oratory: A Beginner’s Guide to Praying in the Home. Our primary focus there was living the faith in the home, but you got little hints of his thesis for this book, didn’t you?

The Way of Beauty: Liturgy, Education, and Inspiration for Family, School, and College is the fruit of David’s contemplation of beauty and how to inspire its pursuit in the educational setting. If you visit Thomas More College, you will encounter his inspiration in action there. It’s a tiny place where great books are studied and lived, thanks to David’s vision.

A book like this is pure gold, because here you receive the principles you need to make good choices. Just as we try to do here on the blog, David isn’t so much providing you with a laundry list of a curriculum — it’s that elusive overarching framework that we’re always searching for that he helps us with.

Above all, he gives us objective criteria for beauty; this is huge, because without that we are always floundering around, trying to make cultural headway by preference alone.

David practically and concisely renders very heady philosophical ideas about beauty and its objectivity into understandable prose, making it possible for the family and anyone involved in building an educational institution to know how to go about applying them.

These days, with so many homeschoolers starting co-ops and homeschool-support programs, it’s vital to have good solid principles to build on. This book gives you just what you need.

Worth the price of the book: David’s recounting of his Oxford days and what characteristics made his time there, ultimately, amount to a real education, even thought he wasn’t (by his own account) a greatly motivated student. You will be consoled if you happen to know anyone who meets that description, ahem. David explains that more depends on the culture of a community than on any one particular thing that’s done there (outside of worship).

After the links, I’ll give you the info for entering this giveaway! Don’t miss it!

This week’s links:

Auntie Leila is as pro-fresh air as the next auntie, and show me a child and I’ll tell you to put that child outside. But these window cages for babies — just, no.


If you like words, any words, you’ll like this post. It might help with all the reading from the early part of the 20th century that we’re always recommending around here!


This report on the Danish word and idea of hygge captures the imagination as we head into winter!


We need the example of others when it comes to making difficult decisions — life or death ones. All too often, medical professionals will not help us to do what is right. This lovely essay shows how to go against the advice of your doctor: Why we let our baby’s death come naturally. If someone talked you or someone you know into doing the wrong thing, there’s hope: Project Rachel.


By the way, Kelly Mantoan over at This Ain’t the Lyceum has some great giveaways for October’s Seven Quick Takes link-up — including The Little Oratory! Do check it all out.

As fall gets up a full head of steam, I’m encouraging you to start or revive or continue your St. Greg’s Pocket. Be bold! It’s more than a discussion group, more than socializing, even more than sharing your faith: It’s building a real community.

Here are two readings that would be perfect to read and discuss if you are so minded:

Stella Morabito wrote a five-piece series to encourage the traditional woman not to be bullied into silence about things that matter. I highly recommend everything she writes. What we do here at Like Mother, Like Daughter is precisely what she calls for in these short essays. It’s strong stuff. I think we need to hear it. A lot depends on us. Part 1. Part 2. Part 3. Part 4. Part 5.

Here’s a taste:

“You have far more power than you realise.  It’s no secret that the family has always been in the crosshairs of die-hard Marxists. Familial bonding, and maternal bonding in particular, gets in the way of re-making the human mind in the Marxist image. We nurture the development of unique and free personalities. This gets in the way of collectivising society to produce a mass mind in a state of mass conformity obedient to the mass State.”

Bishop Olmstead has written a fantastic call to men: Into the breach! Just what we needed — encouragement for the battle! The St. Greg’s Pocket men could not do better than to get together over some beers and hash this one out.

It’s all very simple. Like I said, bold friendship. You don’t need money, much organization other than inviting people (invite anyone friendly you meet, but also — the Facebook pages are all set up — check out your area! If you don’t see one, start one!), any kind of dues or oaths — you just need to get together in real life with like-minded people!

And don’t forget to send us a picture!

As Stella Morabito says, 

The human mind processes what is real, what is true, and what is beauty – or what is not real, true, or beautiful – primarily through its interactions with other human minds. This interaction happens more often today through digital media. And, of course we need to engage on social media.  But at the same time, let’s remember that what people crave most is one-on-one connection.

That’s what the St. Gregory Pockets are all about. Just building the community, one friend at a time. When you have five other families, you will see. Things will be transformed all around you.

From the archives:

This post has the links to the books I recommend for foundational reading in education. I’d add David’s book to the list!

And now for the giveaway:

Please just leave a comment! The giveaway closes on Wednesday night.

 

~We’d like to be clear that, when we direct you to a site via one of our links, we’re not necessarily endorsing the whole site, but rather just referring you to the individual post in question (unless we state otherwise).~

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Habou’s Blog: Corner Art Studio.
Auntie Leila’s Ravelry.
Auntie Leila’s Instagram.
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{pretty, happy, funny, real}

~ Capturing the context of contentment in everyday life ~

Every Thursday, here at Like Mother, Like Daughter!

You can link your Instagram photo here in the linkup! Don’t forget the hashtag #phfr or #prettyhappyfunnyreal — and tag us too if you like: @leilamarielawler @rosabellet @sukarooni @BridgetKLawler

{pretty, happy, funny, real}

Last week the Chief mentioned that a camera crew would be arriving to interview him for some news show. Usually they go into his study and that works fine — it’s book-lined and oak-desked and generally has the air of respectability in there — enough for head shots with blurry backgrounds, anyway.

But this day he felt that his office was not up to snuff. And believe me when I tell you, that means it was not up to snuff. (I remediated somewhat yesterday.)

So naturally, realizing that a news reporter and a man with an advanced apparatus of moving photography would likely be in the living room, I…

… applied Konmari principles to our dressers and the kitchen island, going through all our things and carefully rolling them vs. stacking?

Yes, yes I did. Two areas of my home that were definitely not going to be featured or broadcast anywhere at all became the intense focus of my laser concentration.

Suddenly, all that really mattered was this video I had seen somewhere (and now I don’t remember which one, but the shirts were definitely rolled) of how Marie Kondo recommends that you roll rather than lay flat.

I haven’t read the book, although I plan to. But the video stuck in my brain. So I pulled out this:

Let me ‘splain it to you.

I have in the kitchen island (including but not limited to) the following:

• Nice kitchen towels

• Okay kitchen towels but really excellent for covering rising bread, as they are the right size and tightly woven, which prevents sticking to the dough (I suddenly realized — the camera crew was about an hour away — that I wanted these particular towels not to be in the towel stack, but elsewhere — they really just aren’t that great for drying your hands, certainly not as good as the others, but I’m not the only person grabbing a towel here)

• Not as nice kitchen towels (I also have those in the pantry — they get demoted and are for sloppy messes)

• Dishcloths

• Real rags (not to be confused with sloppy towels or old dishcloths, because if you use those as rags, they will inevitably get cycled back into the good towels/dishcloth piles, and then a guest will suddenly be washing dishes and drying hands with something embarrassing — instead I favor flannel pjs, shirts, and sheets torn up into rag-sized pieces)

• Cloth napkins

Usually all of this gets folded and stacked, as no doubt you have seen in previous long-winded posts about virtually nothing.

The stacks have been separate and approximate.

But here we go:

 

Yes, even the rags, why not, we are going full-crazy-Japanese-tidiness-guru, and the crew is still 45 minutes away:

 

Here are my secret dough towels. I ended up putting them on the other side of the island (which opens on both sides) so that only I will grab them —

–sparing my family from having to memorize my towel preferences:

(And true Auntie Leila fellow-travelers will remember that one of those was rescued from a mildew-y death — and now you know why I couldn’t, no I just couldn’t, throw it away.)

But I failed to roll up the napkins. I… I like them stacked:

 

I don’t have pictures of my dresser drawers. Maybe next time (oh yay!).

Here are my thoughts so far: It’s one thing to take everything out and roll up and put away what you want to keep. It’s another to do the laundry this way — that is, to take a basket of clothes, sort and roll, and then transfer to drawers.

Rolled things… roll.

They roll while you are rolling them, while you are stacking/sorting them (I do this on the sofa or on my bed usually) in the basket, and while you are putting them away. Thus, the work motions are greatly, greatly increased, or am I just a klutz.

I am having trouble thinking that children will not get frustrated with this method, although I could see 8-12 year-old girls getting obsessed as well. Personally, yesterday when I was folding/rolling two loads of laundry I was getting frustrated. Things kept unrolling.

What do you think?

Because in the drawers and on the shelves, this is very nice.

I did manage to make the living room quite presentable.

Aaaaannnndddd…. the interview took place outside on the deck.

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Ask Auntie Leila: Getting the house ready and warm for winter.

Dear McKenna asked a question that of course got my advice juices flowing.

Dear Auntie Leila,

I’m hoping you can offer some wisdom on prepping the home (both house and people) for the winter months.

I’ve recently relocated to upstate New York from Austin Texas. My husband and I grew up in Michigan so we kind of know what we’ve gotten ourselves into, weather-wise. Anyway I’ll take cold over 114 degrees and rattle snakes any day. The problem is I’ve never experienced a winter while running a household or with children. My boys are 8 and 1. My parents run a very efficient household but have trouble articulating exactly what it is they do and why.

Adding to my confusion is the fact that our new home is older (1940s). It is heated with steam radiators and has all the original windows. I was able to use some of your “keeping a home cool in the summer” tips and am hoping you may have similar tips for winter.

We have steam radiators, and I hadn’t planned to install radiator covers. I’m sure we will have a few burned fingers in the beginning but am hoping the little one learns quickly. However a neighbor mentioned that steam radiators get quite a bit hotter than water ones. Should I be concerned?

When is a good time to transition window screens to storm windows? I’d like to do a thorough cleaning while I’m switching them, but what if the weather turns warm again and I miss the screens? I’m thinking late October.

I’ve heard that large coats aren’t supposed to be worn if a child is in a car seat. Assuming a little one can not yet take his coat off unassisted, do I put the coat on, walk out the door, get into the car, take his coat off, buckle him up and repeat in reverse order when getting out? Should I invest in a good quality fleece for quick trips from the house to car and only use the coat when he’s actually outside?

Finally, I’m trying to slowly acquire the outerwear we will need this year. Any tips on brands or items that are a good investment?

Thank you!

McKenna

What we try to do here at Like Mother, Like Daughter is gently help you know how to “live differently” — for instance, living on one income, knowing that perhaps you, like us, do not have the bucks to spend on luxuries like cranking up the heat.

I’m well aware that readers live in different parts of the country, of course.

When I wrote about dressing properly for the cold weather, the comments had me musing on how different things can be for different people. By “cold weather” I don’t really mean in the 40s. And I don’t really mean “for the 10 seconds your child has to run through the 30-degree air.” I mean living where it’s pretty dang cold (and damp to boot, often) and I’m assuming that your children will not be climate controlled at all times, but will want to play outside pretty much regardless.

A lot depends on your circumstances. There’s no question, for instance, that schools are overheated, so it really is folly to send a child all bundled up.

Yet, it’s also folly to think that even as we collectively feel pretty guilty for using up the world’s resources this way, we seem incapable of just turning down the heat in a public building and relying on people to know how to dress.

Do you want to know how to dress? How to keep your house warm in a thrifty way?

This is the thrust of my suggestions in this post: I’m assuming that you want to know how people cope with things when the optimal conditions do not obtain.

Dear McKenna,

Here is what you need to know.

You should install the storm windows now, while the weather is nice during the day. That way, it’s not a problem for you to get them out, clean them, and make the necessary repairs. It’s still warm enough for you to caulk around frames, which will really help keep things warm.

If your house is like the Chief’s parents’ house (built in the 20s), you also have screens to put away, and you want to be sure you do that in an orderly way, saving yourself grief in the spring.

The days are still not so short that you would have to rush when you are cleaning windows, and the leaves haven’t started blowing around, making things hard to clean.

You will probably find that the storm windows have a mechanism so that you can prop them open. Thus, if the weather is nice during the day, you can just do that — open them up at the bottom, pushing them out. You don’t have to really worry about screens since the bugs are gone. (You can always get a few of those little adjustable half-window screens, but a stray wasp isn’t really that big of a deal — they are too drowsy to be a problem.) Even if they don’t have this feature, you can leave off one or two on the sunny side of the house, and pop them on when things really get cold.

This way, you can set your heat at a reasonable level and enjoy having it on in the chilly nights but still open a few windows during the warm days. It can get cold! Our heat has already come on once or twice, but I have replacement windows so it didn’t take long to close them up. (By the way, the old-fashioned windows work just as well with those storms, so don’t worry — just keep them in good repair.)

The radiators probably will need covers. My MIL did have them (we have hot water heat, so no covers). You can see how it goes. Maybe our readers have tips about this form of heat, as I’m not as familiar with it.

Now, you want to notice this year how the heat flow works in your house. This is the year for figuring it out. Do you have zones? If so, you want to set your upstairs to a lower temperature than the downstairs.

The bedrooms really don’t need to be as warm as the living areas. When you have good bedding — flannel sheets, down comforters, duvet covers, wool blankets for in between the layers — you find it’s preferable to sleep in air that is not too stuffy. When the heat is high, everyone wakes up with stuffed noses and headaches, and the rooms get very dusty.

The children should wear flannel pjs with undershirts underneath.

Here is the purpose of the undershirt my dear readers: It’s so that you have a layer which you do not remove, keeping your body heat close. A child can put his undershirt in the wash before the bath. After the bath, keep it on, tucked into the underpants. The pjs get put away and the clothes go on, but never is the poor bare skin exposed to that lower temperature in the bedrooms.

That’s the old-fashioned way. Maybe today people just pay no attention to that sort of thing — I know I had to figure it out — but it’s good to remember it in case for some reason it’s much colder than you expected — for instance, when the power goes out and you aren’t able to simply check into a hotel for the duration.

Anyway, back to the house. Even if you only have one zone, you can keep the different areas warm if you have doors to shut. Your challenge is going to be keeping the warm air downstairs — of course, being warm, it wants to rise. Yes, you can go on heating the first level all day, or you can keep the heated air in place.

You may notice that there is one area where the heat really escapes and there isn’t a door. You can install a heavy curtain there. Just use a strong rod (or conduit bar) and nice matelessé quilts.

Just as in the summer you kept the strong sun out of your rooms, in the winter you want to let that sun in. A really good house is designed to take advantage of the sun’s angles in the different seasons. Mine is not, alas. I have little southern exposure. But if you have some south-facing windows, be sure to open up the curtains during the day.

Then you want to close them in the evening to keep the heat in. Investing in wooden blinds, Roman shades, and heavy curtains really helps with what are basically holes in your shelter.

That ceiling fan that cools you off in the summer can really help move the warm air down from the top of the room — you simply reverse the direction by means of the little switch on the base.

If you have a fireplace, you can see how well it works this winter. Usually fireplaces, unless they are of the Rumford design, aren’t efficient at all. (Readers interested in learning more should check out this little book: The Forgotten Art of Building A Good Fireplace.)

Depending on how it goes this year, you might want to install an efficient wood-burning stove in the fireplace. Combined with a ceiling fan and depending on how big and open your house is, you might find that you can use your heat just to keep your pipes in the basement warm, using the stove as your main source. In any case, it will definitely be an important part of just feeling warm to have a source for the heat around which you can gather — having the warm air radiate makes you feel much warmer, as long as it’s not whooshing past you, bringing cooler air in its wake. I know that my wood-burning stove in the kitchen keeps me from just falling down frozen in the middle of my day.

As to the children’s outerwear, let’s please all use some common sense. If it’s the middle of winter and in the single digits, you just can’t be removing a child’s coat to get in the car! Neither is a really poofy coat going to be practical for a tot. Just get a warm one that he can move around in and make sure that the straps of the carseat are secure.

Kids tend to get extremely overheated in the car, so you have to be smart. You can keep the heat lower; or if it’s on high, then yes, take the jacket off.

The one thing you really can’t do is let all the body heat escape as you are getting out, and then spend a long time outside.

Everyone needs a jacket that goes below the waist to the hips, a hat, a scarf, and mittens. Put the scarf on under the jacket, around the neck. It does no good outside the coat! That way, if the jacket has to come off, at least the chest is still warm. The jacket should have knit wrist cuffs to keep the air from going up the sleeves and to keep the mittens on securely.

One like this is perfect. And this one for a toddler.

I have two whole posts on what kids need for cold weather.

The most important thing to remember is that little kids don’t need bulky sweaters. They usually hate them, won’t wear them, and get overheated in them.

No, they need layers that trap their own heat without confining them: an undershirt, a regular flannel or thick knit shirt, and if anything, a light vest or fleece pullover. Even a thin shirt if the child runs warm will work as long as there is an underwear shirt long enough to tuck in underneath. You will spare yourself the grouchy, seemingly odd breakdown parts of the day if you follow this advice, because getting your body heat back up makes you cranky!

Girls need real pants, not leggings, or corduroy skirts with good sturdy tights. Leggings are not warm enough as the only layer on the legs! And most of all, do not let their little middles be exposed to the air. Tuck that t-shirt in!

Enjoy your winter, dear McKenna! Thank you for writing!

The post Ask Auntie Leila: Getting the house ready and warm for winter. appeared first on Like Mother Like Daughter.

My Family and Other Animals in the Library Project

Title: My Family and Other Animals

Author: Gerald Durrell

File Under: Humor, Family Life, Read Aloud, Homeschooling

Age Group: Anyone able to sit still for a longer read-aloud, and who can be trusted not to repeat the word “bastard” indiscriminately.

You think I’m not talking about homeschooling (or educating children in general) when I really am. It’s just that now that homeschooling has entered the mainstream of commerce, you have perhaps fallen into the habit of thinking of it as something that must come in a package.

But really, learning, education, teaching — these are a matter of coming into contact with what is best and simply enjoying it!

My friend Theresa* had told me about this book, mainly just emphasizing how well it’s written. “You just have to read it. It’s so well written.” Sure enough. And I know I’ve mentioned it before in passing, but I thought I’d get it into a post of its own.

What is reading, teaching, and learning about literature but enjoying well written books?

Oh yes, you will have to analyze, scrutinize, and otherwise investigate all the serious matter as it relates to books. Great fun. But still, reading and enjoying.

Please attend. Wisdom!

Gerald Durrell was a British-born naturalist who set out to write about the island in Greece onto which his family decamped, and where his love of all things flora and fauna found ample scope. His reminiscences, however, couldn’t keep his family out, for they are by far the most interesting and comical specimens to observe!

For the homeschooling family, My Family and Other Animals represents confirmation and consolation for that child or children of yours who simply don’t fit the mold. When we recall that the author, a world-famous naturalist, was an apparently incorrigible student who simply could not be made to sit still and learn his “math facts” yet went on to produce this delightful work (an instant hit, by the way, at the booksellers’), we take heart.

Personally, I wonder if Gerald’s novelist brother Lawrence didn’t have a hand in the telling, for the former’s other books are not as good as this one. However, that does not seem to be the case. And while the events are not strictly told according to chronology and absolute adherence to fact, they are more than entertaining enough to make up for any liberties.

Read this book and try your hand — ask your children to try theirs — at recounting events in an amusing way. Takes skill, but practice and a good example help.

The book was made into a BBC series that was then condensed into a 90-minute movie. I highly recommend it for anyone who has read the book already. Too, too funny.

*By the way, my friend is the author of the book list I always recommend, and I’ve put the book lists all together on this page in the menu bar under “Library Project”.

What is the Like Mother, Like Daughter Library Project?

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{bits & pieces}

The regular “little of this, little of that” feature here at Like Mother, Like Daughter!

After a beautiful summer, The Artist is back to his regular studies. We are floundering through our mornings thanks to wakeful muffins readjusting our routine.

I mention The Artist because he is wrapping up his summer project, which is something that I can’t tell you about explicitly just yet, but which I know that you will love when it comes to fruition. A brilliant colleague and friend asked The Artist to team up on a book that will be a delight for families, and I am excited for when the day comes out that it’s published and ready to share with you! Let me just say that it was awesome to witness the creative process over the past few months – these guys were on fire.

Finnabee and I always like to go in to the studio where he’s studying to pay a visit and look around. Such an amazing atmosphere and so many beautiful paintings!

Sometimes it can hard to express why a story is astounding and genuinely heart-warming as opposed to sappy and even ridiculous. So if I say, “this is a fascinating tale of a dog who was a POW in Japan in WWII,” you will probably be tempted to roll your eyes. I didn’t particularly want to read this when my mom sent it along, but I’m glad I did – one of the amazing tales from that period of how strength of spirit and friendship (in this case, between a man and a dog) kept death at bay beyond expectations.

 

I’ve been feeling the excitement generated by Pope Francis’ visit this past week, but must admit that I haven’t had much time to follow the content of his message at his stops along his trip (is anyone else bewildered by how he manages to keep up with his schedule? I’m just praying that there are competent people in charge of his bedtime!). But I did get around to reading his speech to Congress. If you’re following the visit (as opposed to participating in it and hearing everything first hand), I encourage you to read him directly as much as possible before looking too much to commentary… and of course avoid the fiction-peddling commentary as much as possible!

 

Did you celebrate the 100th Anniversary of the introduction of Jeeves & Wooster? Jeeves and the Vital Oolong from The Economist.

 

My pick of the week. Auntie Leila pulled up this First Things article from a few years back, in which R. R. Reno shows us how concern for moral inequality should go hand-in-hand with – or even ahead of – income inequality. The Preferential Option for the Poor.

 

From the Archives:

Building the Culture with Furniture


A Pep Talk for Organization


10 Reasons to Sing with Your Children



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{pretty, happy, funny, real} ~ vacation edition

~ Capturing the context of contentment in everyday life ~

Every Thursday, here at Like Mother, Like Daughter!

A few months ago, I texted Sukie something along the lines of, “I found the closest beach, and it’s near Houston. We are all going to rent a house in Galveston together in September.” Her response was something along the lines of, “Yes, yes we are.”

And you know what? We did!

Our hardworking husbands were able to take a little leave at the same time, which just happened to be soon after everyone else went back to school (and, notably, the rental rates dropped). It was still hot, but not scorching, and we pretty much had the place to ourselves.

It was wonderful.

{pretty}

I only pulled my camera out twice, since it’s a lot easier to handle an iphone than a big camera when you’re also trying to hold a baby on the beach and simultaneously help keep several small children from hurling themselves into the Gulf of Mexico. (And even the phone is a little tricky.)

But I did bring it along on a few evening trips to the beach, so I do have a few pretty photos to show you.

{happy}

Someone didn’t get the memo about not going in the water with all your clothes on:

(But that’s ok. We didn’t get into bathing suits that time so we’d get out the door faster. Get your clothes wet! We’re on vacation!)

This little girl caught her Aunt Sukie’s eye from about 20 feet away and just lit up:

(Hashtag, lovethosechunkythighs)

And this little guy is just the happiest. There was nothing about the beach that he didn’t love.

{funny}

“Quick, let’s crouch down and grab the kids, and they’ll totally stand still long enough for Sukie to take a nice family photo!”

“Ok, but I really want a picture of me and my sister and all the kids. Let’s try a little harder this time.”

There was just too much going on. They each had about 15 seconds of standing-still-looking-at-the-camera time in them, and none of it overlapped. Oh well. We love them anyway.

Meanwhile, this face totally made my day:

So much attitude expressed in this picture that does not actually exist in reality!

{real}

On the way down, we left in the wee hours of the morning so we could get some good driving done while the kids were sleeping, and so we could stop outside of Dallas for Mass and breakfast with my brother-in-law before continuing on. This seemed like a good plan the night before, but a little less so at the aforementioned wee hour.

To anyone who may have seen us at church that morning (including/especially one sweet reader who introduced herself afterwards!), I apologize for my children’s extraordinarily squirmy ways, and can only say that they’d been in the car for three hours already when we arrived. We were not on our A game, I’m afraid. The good news is that your children all looked like angels by comparison. (not that they needed it!)

Our two “bigs” are pretty good travelers, but Nora, sadly, is not a fan of the car. We did our best, she did her best, and the Chick-fil-a we stopped at on the way home did its best, too, with lunch, a playplace, and balloons for all the kids! Thank you, Chick-fil-a. That was clutch.

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Flexible cake.

I have a long backlog of “Ask Auntie Leila” questions… and many things to post about… but feeling a bit of “task gridlock”… how about you?

Life doesn’t seem to get any less hectic even if your kids are all grown and out. Such is my experience.

Instead of figuring out a math curriculum or getting my history books sorted out for the kiddos, I’m wrestling with three manuscripts at once: an ebook that puts all the Casti Connubii posts in one place, the better to access for when your St. Greg’s Pocket meets up and you’d like something substantial to discuss; an essay about the three wishes I have for liturgical reform (they might not be what you think, but maybe you have your three wishes?); and also a book draft.

That’s all. So now you know why I seem distracted here. But let us not be distracted from cake.

There are cakes and there are cakes.

Sometimes you have the time and inclination to go all layers and swirls and frosting and filling. Sometimes “they” are coming (and you know who “they” are — cake-seekers, undoubtedly bringing their little cake-seeking offspring in tow).

You need a dessert that doesn’t take an hour or more in the oven because you were also shopping and cleaning and fielding phone calls, and you didn’t leave quite enough time for cake.

You need cake, but not one that will go all high maintenance on you when you try to get it out of the pan. You know, a bundt.

This is that cake.

The recipe (my version at the end) started out life as one for an awesome apple cake. I recommend trying it that way. Easy and somehow just very apple-y without any interference. Everyone loves this in its original incarnation as “Apple Cake.” (Just remember my golden rule: butter and flour that bundt pan to a fare-the-well.)

I took a snap of the original recipe, copied and pasted in a file from a saved email (oft-forwarded, as you can see with those >>>s):

Lorraine is funny, am I right?

But on this day, I had nectarines and as I say, shortness of time.

And instead of vanilla, I opted for almond extract, which I love and which goes amazingly with stone fruit. Use one teaspoon instead of one tablespoon of the vanilla.

So into the lasagna pan (13 x 9) goes the batter, with the chopped-up nectarines on top.

Sprinkle with a little sugar (if you had them, you could also throw some sliced almonds on top) and pop in the oven for 35 minutes…

… Or not quite this long:

A very nice little visiting cake, with a dense and almond-y flavor that complements the nectarines (you could of course use peaches).

Here is the revised recipe:

Nectarine Flexible Cake, Like Mother, Like Daughter, with a hat-tip to Lorraine

You don’t need to be worried about getting the ingredients mixed just so, but it helps if you do it in this order:

Mix together:

1 cup oil (I used melted butter, after all, but you could use coconut oil or peanut oil)

1 1/2 cups sugar 

4 eggs

1 tsp. almond extract

Add:

3 cups flour

1 Tbps baking powder

1/2 tsp. salt

Mix gently, adding

1/4 cup water or apple juice (I am pretty sure that, as I didn’t have apple juice and wouldn’t have thought it went if I had, but wasn’t feeling the water, I did part water and part milk. But I was in a rush and this cake is flexible. Don’t be mad at Auntie Leila, it will be good.)

Put batter in a well greased lasagna pan or large cake pan, 13 x 9.

Top with 3 large nectarines, chopped.

Sprinkle with a little sugar.

Bake at 350* for 25-35 minutes or until lightly browned and nicely risen.

Let cool and serve in squares. A little side of whipped cream would not go amiss!