Leila Marie Lawler's Blog, page 19
June 12, 2021
Beauty will save the neighborhood
American yard decoration doesn’t usually include statuary, but of late it has gone straight from personalized seasonal flags to aggressive statements of leftist creeds, interspersed, it’s true, with the rare red-white-and-blue TRUMP-bannered outlier. At least that is how it is here on the East Coast.
What is the point, I ask myself, of proclaiming on a placard that “ALL ARE WELCOME” when I can guarantee that I, at least, would not be welcome, not at all. The judgmental politics of non-judgmentalism are plastered all over people’s lawns, and it has the effect of alienating others and creating a sense of division.
Some people have suggested making yard signs with counter messages. I have wondered if this is the right response. To post a sign with, say, the Apostle’s Creed, or a point-by-point refutation of the love is love/we believe in science narrative, one seems to grant the premise that people want to know each other’s opinions, that those opinions ought to be expressed verbally on one’s lawn, and that doing so will have a good effect.
I don’t think this is the way, nor do I think even those sporting the signs care much about them, so it’s missing the point. Instead, I think all those BLM and Pride rainbows function like Václav Havel’s “greengrocer’s sign in the window” (from his essay, The Power of the Powerless — do read the whole thing if you haven’t, and by the way you say his name Vadslav Havel, apparently). He was a Czech statesman who knew a thing or two about powerlessness.
The manager of a fruit-and-vegetable shop places in his window, among the onions and carrots, the slogan: “Workers of the world, unite!” Why does he do it? What is he trying to communicate to the world? Is he genuinely enthusiastic about the idea of unity among the workers of the world? Is his enthusiasm so great that he feels an irrepressible impulse to acquaint the public with his ideals? Has he really given more than a moment’s thought to how such a unification might occur and what it would mean?
I think it can safely be assumed that the overwhelming majority of shopkeepers never think about the slogans they put in their windows, nor do they use them to express their real opinions…
Let us take note: if the greengrocer had been instructed to display the slogan “I am afraid and therefore unquestioningly obedient;’ he would not be nearly as indifferent to its semantics, even though the statement would reflect the truth. The greengrocer would be embarrassed and ashamed to put such an unequivocal statement of his own degradation in the shop window, and quite naturally so, for he is a human being and thus has a sense of his own dignity. To overcome this complication, his expression of loyalty must take the form of a sign which, at least on its textual surface, indicates a level of disinterested conviction. It must allow the greengrocer to say, “What’s wrong with the workers of the world uniting?” Thus the sign helps the greengrocer to conceal from himself the low foundations of his obedience, at the same time concealing the low foundations of power. It hides them behind the facade of something high. And that something is ideology.
Today we call it virtue-signaling, but that doesn’t quite get to the subtlety of servility, the acquiescence to the totalitarian impulse, that Havel’s longer analysis achieves. But let’s just say that to counter it with a different sort of virtue-signaling accomplishes nothing — other than sucking the person who does it into the vortex of ideology that he is trying to oppose.
Instead, let’s do something that most Americans have never done (other than in ethnic enclaves; certainly not in the fancy suburbs where signs proliferate) and most modern people in developed places do not do any more: let’s make our yards beautiful with a sacred art shrine of some sort.
We tend to expect statues in churches and parks, although these days they might not even be in the latter, if they have met with censure from the new history police. But maybe we can bring them into our own little sphere.
Specifically, let’s step out of the war of words and even out of the frustration with our neighboring “greengrocers” and their seeming subservience to power.
Beauty is the radiance of truth. If we merely post a “respect life” sign for the benefit of perfect strangers or our neighbors, we activate a response, pro or con. But if we show a Madonna and Child, we draw the passer-by into a different realm where the child is not only respected but loved and where we desire to be the sort of person who participates in that world of love.
I will draw them with the cords of Adam, with the bands of love : and I will be to them as one that taketh off the yoke on their jaws: and I put his meat to him that he might eat.
(Hosea 11:4, from the first reading at Mass yesterday; it struck me as I was thinking about this post.)
When we’re having an intellectual debate we can state our position, but when we are dealing with everyone on the street whether we really know them or not, we must draw them towards truth and away from ideology. It’s love that draws hearts towards itself, and beauty is the manifestation of love.
Of course, I live at the end of a dirt lane; there are no passers-by. Here is where I would put my statue, and only those already here would see it:
But I would love to see some traditionally conceived sacred art on or in front of a house I am passing… instead of some haranguing placard. And I don’t mean a banner… I mean a real statue, icon, or bas relief in a niche.
I also want to mention the virtue of magnanimity, which is to venture great things, and in part this virtue challenges us to acquire that habit of generously spending money on beautiful things for the benefit of others. Without rich people using their wealth magnanimously, spending freely on real and beautiful art and architecture, nothing in the public sphere would inspire and draw us into another realm. Indeed, magnanimity redeems riches! How would artists live if it were not for patrons? To be a patron one must have money.
Even those of more modest means can practice this virtue in this particular way, though. We don’t have to endow a public monument, but we could offer a chance pedestrian on our street a beautiful image.
But here’s the problem: how to find really beautiful art for our gardens, walls, and niches?
I don’t know! I even had difficulty finding examples of art in people’s yards for this post.
There are some mass-produced statues that are rather pretty. Part of me wants one, part of me wants to find something unique…
So tell me — and the rest of us — if you have a source for beautiful, traditional, and durable statues, bas-reliefs, and mosaics, or anything that we could put out for others to see and behold. We’d like to know of the less expensive choices and the more expensive ones too.
bits & piecesI should say “and a couple of announcements”!
Don’t forget that the 20% off code for my newly republished book, God Has No Grandchildren (2nd edition) is good until the 14th! Use the code PiusXI (case sensitive) when you get to your cart.And I still have four places left for me to talk via teleconferencing with your book group! Send me a message at LMLDblog@gmail.com to reserve a spot. You don’t have to commit to a time or date at all — just get on the list! Email the publisher for a discount on bulk orders.In case you are local, go hear my friend Leila Miller fearlessly defend marriage! Catholic Answers invites you to Ascension Parish in San Diego, CA, on Friday, June 18 for our first local lecture and reception. Our speaker will be Leila Miller and her talk will be titled “Let No Man Put Asunder: What the Catholic Church Really Teaches About Lifelong Marriage.“Come at 6:30pm for some social time over wine and cheese. Talk starts at 7pm.
Ascension Catholic Church
11292 Clairemont Mesa Blvd
San Diego, CA 92124
Leila is the author of Primal Loss: The Now-Adult Children of Divorce Speak, Impossible Marriages Redeemed, and Raising Chaste Catholic Men: Practical Advice, Mom to Mom, and co-author (with Trent Horn) of Made This Way: How to Prepare Kids to Face Today’s Tough Moral Issues. Leila fearlessly takes on the controversial moral issues of our day with unfailing clarity and charity.
“Please join us for an engaging talk and convivial conversation. The event is free and open to the public so do bring a friend.”
Immaculate Heart of Mary, as well as the anniversary of my father’s death, if you can spare a prayer.
follow us everywhere!My “random thoughts no pictures” blog, Happy Despite Them — receive it by email if you like, or bookmark, so you don’t miss a thing!
Stay abreast of the posts here at LMLD, when they happen:
Consider subscribing to this blog by email. In the current situation, if we can’t meet here, it would be good for us to be connected by email!
We share pretty pictures: Auntie Leila’s Instagram, Rosie’s Instagram. Sukie’s Instagram. Deirdre’s Instagram. Bridget’s Instagram.
Auntie Leila’s Facebook (you can just follow)
The boards of the others: Rosie’s Pinterest. Sukie’s Pinterest. Deirdre’s Pinterest. Habou’s Pinterest (you can still get a lot of inspiration here! and say a prayer for her!). Bridget’s Pinterest.
The post Beauty will save the neighborhood appeared first on Like Mother Like Daughter.
June 5, 2021
I will meet with your reading group!
We have a winner of the giveaway of the signed copy of my new book! If it is you, an email will be wending its way, so look for it!
Thank you all for your kind and encouraging comments about God Has No Grandchildren! You really know how to make a gal’s week! Now my turn:
For this week only, receive 20% off your order of God Has No Grandchildren from Arouca Press! Use the code PiusXI (case sensitive) to receive a 20% discount on the book. This offer is good until June 14th!
And — I had an idea…
How about this? If you organize a reading group to study Casti Connubii using my guided reading, God Has No Grandchildren, I will join you via some form of online conferencing (like Zoom or whatever platform you prefer if I can make it work) for your last meeting!
I will talk to your group, if you like, for free! It will be fun! You can gather your thoughts and questions and arguments and we can have a good talk for about an hour or so.
I can offer this online get-together to 10 groups. (I charge $$$ for an online conference, so this is quite a giveaway!)
Email me at LMLDblog@gmail.com to set it up. First come, first served!
Remember: for this week only, receive 20% off your order of God Has No Grandchildren from Arouca Press! Use the code PiusXI (case sensitive) to receive a 20% discount on the book. This offer is good until June 14th!
And don’t forget, the publisher will offer a discount on bulk orders (email him at info@aroucapress.com for details.
On to our links!
bits & piecesThe Heroic Capuchin Friar Who Saved Thousands of Jews During World War II: “The first reason for my action is justice,” Father Marie-Benoît wrote in a note that Lormier found in the Archives of the Capuchin Order in Paris. “The reign of Jesus Christ, which is a reign of love, is also, because of this, a reign of justice: whoever sincerely loves his neighbor, respects first of all his right to life, and therefore cannot remain indifferent and passive in the face of a persecution which is as atrocious as it is unjustified. The duty to intervene is therefore imperative …” A three-part (but not over-long) series on beauty in the spiritual life, by David Clayton.Someone posted a meme around Mother’s Day that was a mug that said something like “I
my Birthing Person” and I just want to say that making lame jokes that aren’t really jokes is how things get normalized. (I am all for good jokes that go for the jugular, however). It’s already happened; the experiment already succeeded: The dark, enduring legacy of Friends (not to mention a whole host of sitcoms before that one).A homily worth listening to again, when the subject of obedience comes up: Obedience & Prudence, Liberty & Responsibility.If you want to know what is being sold online, the answer is… you — literally, your engagement and its optimization. Figuring out how to use this tool is the challenge of our day. “Social media is initially appealing to us because of our natural sociability (which evolved in face-to-face societies). But, like an engineered virus that escapes the lab, it has taken on a life of its own.” I found this article well written and penetrating without completely dismissing the value of this means of communication: “Social media tribalizes thought, but it also liberates thought from the monopoly power of the propaganda state that operates through the legacy corporate media.”The implications of the state taking over matters that are not proper to it: Young Chinese professionals reject having more children. The issue is not as simple as oppression and then the lifting (if even partial) of oppression. Habit and custom affect how people live. Even in a free society like ours, popular pressure to limit family size coupled with the assumption that a woman’s highest calling is to work will affect childbearing, even when the government begins to realize that population has been suppressed and perhaps should be stimulated. What one has switched off is not so easy to switch on again.Do you have a good article about magnesium supplements to help children with anxiety, moodiness, and picky eating? I found this one: Magnesium Supplements for Children with Anxiety – Are They OK? (answer: yes) I think it was one of our readers who mentioned that children who are excessively picky about food sometimes have a magnesium deficiency… which of course is not helped by their pickiness! I’d like to see what you have found on this subject too!from the archivesWell, I wouldn’t have put “grandmother” in the title, necessarily, but in case you missed it, here is an interview with me about Bishop Schneider’s recommendations for a “survival plan” for keeping the faith in the family.How to overcome the sort of “child resistance” that is reported in China and exists here too: My third secret for destruction-proofing your family.Time for strawberry rhubarb pie!liturgical livingMemorial of St. Boniface, bishop and martyr
follow us everywhere!My “random thoughts no pictures” blog, Happy Despite Them — receive it by email if you like, or bookmark, so you don’t miss a thing!
Stay abreast of the posts here at LMLD, when they happen:
Consider subscribing to this blog by email. In the current situation, if we can’t meet here, it would be good for us to be connected by email!
We share pretty pictures: Auntie Leila’s Instagram, Rosie’s Instagram. Sukie’s Instagram. Deirdre’s Instagram. Bridget’s Instagram.
Auntie Leila’s Facebook (you can just follow)
The boards of the others: Rosie’s Pinterest. Sukie’s Pinterest. Deirdre’s Pinterest. Habou’s Pinterest (you can still get a lot of inspiration here! and say a prayer for her!). Bridget’s Pinterest.
The post I will meet with your reading group! appeared first on Like Mother Like Daughter.
May 29, 2021
You asked for it and now it’s here! Giveaway!
Almost five years ago, I published the Kindle version of my book, God Has No Grandchildren: A guided reading of Pius XI’s encyclical Casti Connubii, On Chaste Marriage. I had to publish it myself, because as I say in the introduction, who is interested in reading a dusty old encyclical?
But funnily enough, thousands of you did want to read it. Many of you had read my posts and were excited to have an edited version, all in one place, that you could take to your study. You wanted to think more about what the Church teaches about marriage. You were willing to put in the work to find out. You got together in reading groups, you read it alone, you read it with your spouse.
And after you read it, you exclaimed, “I never knew… ” “This changed my marriage… ” “We had another baby… ”
But the one comment I always got was, “Auntie Leila, please make this a real book! I don’t want to read it on my Kindle!” Or many just don’t read on a Kindle, period.
Well, thanks to Peter Kwasniewski, who innocently asked me, “Have you ever written anything about Casti Connubii?” (Me: “Do I ever!”) and then expressed great enthusiasm for getting it published for real, and Alexandros Barbas, publisher of Arouca Press, who was equally excited and got right to work, the second edition of God Has No Grandchildren has been released! In both hard- and soft-cover!
And I am happy to offer a giveaway of a signed hardcover copy of this book! Just leave a comment to be entered!
What I’m really thrilled about is that this edition has a new introduction, the full text of the encyclical for easy reference while studying, a timeline of events leading up to it, and in general has been spruced up. The book, although 224 pages, is a good size to pop into your bag for book club. The margins are ample enough for little notes and the book opens up pleasingly (these are the hills I die on!).
In addition to the endorsement by George Cardinal Pell and a nice plug from Fr. Jerry Pokorsky, this second edition has new endorsements from Prof. Robert George and Kimberly Hahn.
But the most important update to this book came about in an interesting way. After I published the first edition, the apostolic exhortation Amoris Laetitia was promulgated. At the time, I thought and wrote a lot about this letter, which deeply disturbed me. At that point, I realized two things: one, it seems to contradict paragraph 10 of Casti Connubii, and two, that is the one paragraph I did not discuss in the book; I didn’t even include #10 in the paragraph schema.
Some critics mentioned difficulties with the claim of Amoris Laetitia that those in a second relationship can basically make their peace with the Church, and receive Holy Communion, if the presence of children requires it. But that is exactly the opposite of what Pius XI (citing St. Augustine) says in Casti Connubii!
So this new edition has a new chapter, in which I carefully lay out the steps that expose the lack of continuity in Pope Francis’ exhortation; and of course, continuity is essential for the Magisterium.
My original lacuna was providential; it gave me the opportunity to delve deeply into the question, study it, and offer what I hope is a good analysis of the implications of accepting this new interpretation.
The paperback version!I hope you will read it. I hope you will read the whole thing, because I truly believe that the crisis of our time is a crisis of marriage. Ordinary people, abetted by a corrupt clergy, have turned away from their God-given responsibility to be fruitful, multiply, and fill the earth in a way that is faithful, generous, unitive, and sacramental. The refusal has implications that resonate throughout the natural and spiritual realms, for as St. Paul tells us, “This is a great mystery: but I speak concerning Christ and the church.” (Ephesians 5:32)
I believe that Christianity has the answers but they have been hidden from us. Perhaps you have read the encyclical Humanae Vitae; I assure you that you will be challenged, in a good way, by reading Casti Connubii. My aim is to get it into your hands! If I can do this, I will truly rest easier, because the words are life-changing! We need to return to them.
Please note that the publisher is open to discounting bulk orders; if your pastor, for instance, wants to get in a supply for marriage prep (for which this book is ideally suited, as my explanations are geared towards those who really have never heard any of this teaching before), he should be encouraged! Or for your book club… or for you to distribute to all and sundry! Just email him for details: info@aroucapress.com
To enter the giveaway, just leave a comment! I will choose a winner next week!
And please, please leave a review on the Amazon page or in your Goodreads account. It makes such a difference to bringing a book to people’s attention. I would be so grateful!
bits & piecesThings are hotting up. It seems like aggression has increased, and even just stating obvious facts like girls are girls and boys are boys is met with diabolical scorn, anger, and silencing. Let’s be calm but strong. Dr. Paul McHugh provides a good role model and combines the highest standard of medical expertise with the clear vision and fortitude of a Catholic gentleman. A Virtual Time-Lapse Recreation of the Building of Notre Dame (1160)Clear Creek Abbey Revisited: A Triumph of Modern Classicism in the Romanesque FootprintA brief history of British socks (knitters corner haha)The Mortifications of Beverly Cleary: The author recognized that humiliation is a kind of trauma—and that gentle humor could help neutralize it.Transgenderism and the End of the Sacramental Order Why do I keep posting links about this? Please know that this ideology has entered the mainstream. It’s likely that a medical professional will ask your child, if given the chance, what his preferred pronouns are. In many states, you will lose your rights over your child if these professionals can drive the thin edge of the wedge into the situation by finding a pretext in the answers to pursue “transitioning,” which is quite simply a lucrative market for them. The fact that it destroys lives doesn’t seem to stop this juggernaut. Carnegie Hall Selects is a new series of free concert films from legendary stages around the world, featuring some of the greatest performances of music central to the Hall’s history. Each film is introduced by Clive Gillinson, Carnegie Hall’s executive and artistic director, who shares insights about the various connections to the Hall, as well as personal anecdotes about the performers and the music. A new Carnegie Hall Selects film will be released each Friday at 12 PM (Eastern), available to stream for one week exclusively on the Hall’s website.from the archivesIn case you missed it: I talk to Eric Sammons of Crisis Magazine about feminism. In podcast form here. I think people have really not heard some of my arguments… I posted about summer salads and rushing and being so efficient that the food doesn’t seem fresh and basically just let’s be calmer and enjoy! liturgical livingSt. Mother Orsola (Giulia) Ledóchowska. Tomorrow is Trinity Sunday!
follow us everywhere!
My “random thoughts no pictures” blog, Happy Despite Them — receive it by email if you like, or bookmark, so you don’t miss a thing!
Stay abreast of the posts here at LMLD, when they happen:
Consider subscribing to this blog by email. In the current situation, if we can’t meet here, it would be good for us to be connected by email!
We share pretty pictures: Auntie Leila’s Instagram, Rosie’s Instagram. Sukie’s Instagram. Deirdre’s Instagram. Bridget’s Instagram.
Auntie Leila’s Facebook (you can just follow)
The boards of the others: Rosie’s Pinterest. Sukie’s Pinterest. Deirdre’s Pinterest. Habou’s Pinterest (you can still get a lot of inspiration here! and say a prayer for her!). Bridget’s Pinterest.
The post You asked for it and now it’s here! Giveaway! appeared first on Like Mother Like Daughter.
May 15, 2021
How I refreshed our christening gown
After Christmas I had a talk with Rosie’s mother-in-law, my dear friend Ann, about our respective christening gowns and their need for rehabilitation. (At that point we were both expecting a new grandchild; mine has arrived, hers is still in the oven!)
You can see the gowns in this post if you are interested.
They are remarkably similar! And each of us felt that the gown belonging to us needed an overhaul. Ann’s has so many little tears that she thinks she has to have it replicated. Mine (which comes from my husband’s family — I was baptized as an adult!) is getting thin but otherwise in remarkably good shape.
But I always have thought it’s not quite long enough. Somehow it gets bunched up during the baptism and the full effect of a nice long gown doesn’t come through in photos or even in real life, where you feel you are constantly not succeeding in pulling it down!
Of course, the baby is the star and that covers a multitude of dressmaking concerns! Here is little Nora about six years ago:
I thought and thought of what to do. I fell asleep thinking about it! The way the gown is made doesn’t leave much room for maneuvering.
{Commence interminably long discussion of the process, feel free to skip down to this week’s links!}
Finally I decided that the original slip needed to be made into an additional ruffle on the gown, giving it more length, and a new slip needed to be made that is even longer still. This strategy, I hope, gives an abundance to the entire ensemble. It may not be a royal christening gown, but it is ours, we love it, and now it’s got more flounce!
I ordered a length of cotton lawn and one of baptiste (appropriately named!) as well as some lace from Farmhouse Fabrics (I have no affiliation with them, just letting you know that they have a lot of classic fabrics and trims). The two fabrics are nearly identical with each other and a bit stiffer than the original of the gown — and that difference may be due to years of wear and washing, or just that there is a difference. I am not even sure which one of the two I ordered I ended up using!
The lace I chose has little crosses on it. They do carry something remarkably similar to what is on the gown, but I liked the idea of the crosses!
You can see that I cut the slip down and added it just below that first row of inserted lace on the gown. Yes, it was a hard decision and even harder to cut into that slip. But I think it was for the best.
I never liked the way the old slip buttoned at both shoulders. It’s hard to get on and have stay on with a wriggly little baby, and if it comes apart while the gown is over it, it’s hard to rectify.
But I also was not looking forward to making even one little buttonhole on the new slip, in the back, so I used one of the old ones: work avoidance for the win!
Getting back to the new flounce at the bottom of the gown using the slip: the slip is not as wide as the gown, so it doesn’t go quite around. But we have decided that it’s fine because a) the infant will not be walking anywhere, displaying this side and b) it looks vaguely like a vestment…
It’s hard to take a picture of a white garment but I seem to specialize in it, with my quaint little vintage phone:
This is the sweet cap:
And that is it! A nice “waiting for baby” project and one that I hope offers some new life to this family gown!
And a darling Symphorosa Marie to wear it for her baptism!
{bits & pieces}Peter Kwasniewski on Pius XI’s teaching on Christian education. A while ago I put this encyclical on our St. Gregory Pocket reading list. It’s especially important for those seeking to establish a Christian school, as I know so many of you are. The goals and pitfalls have already been thought out for you!Efficiency is the Enemy. While I am a big advocate of doing your work efficiently, and a lot of this blog is devoted to helping you do that, I wholeheartedly agree with the author of this post that it’s a serious mistake to schedule every minute of your day, on the mistaken assumption that efficiency means maximum use of time. Particularly, women need to understand that we require a lot of unschedule time, precisely so that we can meet the unpredictability of life with children serenely and effectively. Even more, it’s good to see that a family functions better when the mother is not scheduled more than she has to be, precisely because the father can’t abandon his commitments to the outside world very easily. That means a lot of her day might look rather leisurely, but that is a very good thing. This reminds me to remind you to read God’s Hotel (affiliate link), which is about how our modern medical care differs from the medieval model (and not always in a good way). Much of what the author, a doctor and medical historian, observes is the importance of not prioritizing efficiency in hospitals.Do you know the story of Sybil Luddington, 16-year-old Patriot, who rode through the night to warn of the British attack on Danbury? A good one to tell the children!Instead Of Canceling ‘Snow White,’ Learn To Read Fairy Tales: “In Disney’s ‘Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs’ the prince does have permission to kiss Snow White. He just doesn’t get it in writing and signed in triplicate.”“… Dostoevsky had been the first to describe, with astonishing accuracy, what we have come to call totalitarianism.” With
The Brothers Karamazov
“he undertook to vindicate its Christian alternative.”from the archivesOnce you organize a closet that the children have access to, how do you keep it tidy?The importance of the imaginative life — and fairy tales.liturgical livingSt. Isadore — and the last week of Easter; time to prepare for Pentecost!
Good to remember that May is the month of Our Lady (helpful when the children are heart-breakingly plucking the first, long-for blooms from the garden; we can lovingly place them at her feet!).
follow us everywhere!My new “random thoughts no pictures” blog, Happy Despite Them — receive it by email if you like, or bookmark, so you don’t miss a thing!
Stay abreast of the posts here at LMLD, when they happen:
Consider subscribing to this blog by email. In the current situation, if we can’t meet here, it would be good for us to be connected by email!
We share pretty pictures: Auntie Leila’s Instagram, Rosie’s Instagram. Sukie’s Instagram. Deirdre’s Instagram. Bridget’s Instagram.
Auntie Leila’s Facebook (you can just follow)
The boards of the others: Rosie’s Pinterest. Sukie’s Pinterest. Deirdre’s Pinterest. Habou’s Pinterest (you can still get a lot of inspiration here! and say a prayer for her!). Bridget’s Pinterest.
The post How I refreshed our christening gown appeared first on Like Mother Like Daughter.
April 24, 2021
New baby alert!
Deirdre has had her baby, her fifth (and our sixteenth grandchild!). It’s that magical time in the home where the baby is here, things are calm…
I have no idea whether we have achieved any consistency in reporting about these babies… everyone is so busy and sometimes I’m there and sometimes I’m not. I’m on the spot here! — well, the spot is here with me!
Deirdre had her fourth homebirth here at the manse… and she is really a pro. There is something so soothing about the midwives moving in and out quietly or staying in the room with her while the rest of the household goes about its business (alert yet peaceful).
(All my daughters — well, not sure about Bridget yet — and my daughter-in-law are super-pros in this department, UN-like me. I am in awe of them all.)
So things have been busy here in the past week! Little Symphorosa Marie was born on April 14 in the evening. You can read about Symphorosa the early Roman martyr here.
I didn’t post about it last week because there are so many in the immediate circle to be contacted and spoken with about this new miracle.
She was 8 lbs 14 oz which is on the small side for one of Deirdre’s babies but is still rather, I mean one does not wish to call her large as this descriptor is not flattering, but really, she is good and healthy.
And adorable.
And snuggly.
Babies — I recommend ’em!
bits & piecesBefore we get to links, I have two queries for you, my dear readers!
First, does anyone have experience ordering a handmade headstone for a grave? Any recommendations for me? I would love to support an artisan stone carver but of course don’t have a huge budget. I have no idea how to even start in the quest for a headstone for my mother’s grave. Someone in New England would be great, I think.
Second, I set up my new blog Happy Despite Them so that people could subscribe by email and stay connected that way. Naturally, Blogger is discontinuing the Feedburner service that provides the automated email aspect. I don’t make money from the blog, so don’t really want to spend money on this service, but would like not to have everyone register again if possible. How can I change over without burning out my brain?
Feel free to email me on either of these topics (or anything else) at LMLDblog at gmail dot com. Thanks!
On to our links!
Boys aren’t the problem — good book review by Sally Thomas.“In many ways, the issues raised in Oh Boy! apply to all children, not just boys. It’s problematic for any child to be asked to do things the brain and body aren’t ready to do. A child whose powers of analytic reasoning haven’t yet begun to develop will struggle to understand numbers, or to connect spoken sounds with printed letters. A child consumed with a physical drive to move and explore will struggle with sitting still. That someone thinks a child should be able to do these things doesn’t mean that all children, or even most children, can do them.”
Our schola has sung the Allegri Miserere at times (when we’ve had a soprano who can handle those high notes) — it’s so beautiful, so moving. This short documentary compares the original, ancient version with an intermediate one and then the one that many of us know today, with that soaring high C and haunting embellishments. I do actually love the more ancient one! But who could ever do away with the newer one? What do you think?Boys and Girls May Get Different Breast Milk. Sex is not a construct!I really recommend listening to Patrick Coffin’s interview of a California restaurateur who doesn’t allow masks or any other restrictions in his place. And yet the restaurant is open. Tony Basilico has a native common “uncommon” sense; he worries about what compromise does to the soul. He articulates his position well; his words will hearten anyone who intuits that he must fight but needs courage. He “pledges his business as a “Constitutional Battleground’ in the fight against all Lockdown Tyranny.” If you are skeptical, please listen. If you too are sick and tired of lockdown, please listen! from the archivesWhat is sacred art? (From our reading together of Joseph Ratzinger’s Spirit of the LiturgyLooking forward to some strawberry rhubarb pie!liturgical livingfollow us everywhere!My new “random thoughts no pictures” blog, Happy Despite Them — receive it by email if you like, or bookmark, so you don’t miss a thing!
Stay abreast of the posts here at LMLD, when they happen:
Consider subscribing to this blog by email. In the current situation, if we can’t meet here, it would be good for us to be connected by email!
We share pretty pictures: Auntie Leila’s Instagram, Rosie’s Instagram. Sukie’s Instagram. Deirdre’s Instagram. Bridget’s Instagram.
Auntie Leila’s Facebook (you can just follow)
The boards of the others: Rosie’s Pinterest. Sukie’s Pinterest. Deirdre’s Pinterest. Habou’s Pinterest (you can still get a lot of inspiration here! and say a prayer for her!). Bridget’s Pinterest.
The post New baby alert! appeared first on Like Mother Like Daughter.
April 17, 2021
To teach reverence we must be reverent
My eggplant coming up — so excited!Teaching reverence to children, like anything else, is something we have to practice ourselves.
How can we do it if we fall prey to a relatively recent trend in devotional methods of reading Scripture? This trend feeds a growing industry in devotional products, and so becomes ever more firmly entrenched in people’s minds — but it needs to be resisted. I’ve written about this before…
What is the trend? It is to approach Scripture and also sacred persons in an exclusively psychological way. It’s the Ignatian method (using one’s imagination in contemplating scenes in the Bible), along with the exclusively historical approach, gone rather wrong.
This amalgamation has virtually driven out the other senses of Scripture: the allegorical, which presents images and stories as symbols of virtues or states (for instance, Noah’s ark as a symbol of the church or the parting of the Red Sea as an allegory for God’s triumph); the moral, “for our instruction” as St. Paul says, and the anagogical, which leads us to see what is beyond the literal meaning to higher things.
The latter sense, especially, is virtually eliminated from our way of thinking about the figures we encounter. When was the last time you thought of the elder brother in the story of the Prodigal Son as a representative of the Jewish people and the younger son as a representative of the gentile nations? Usually we only think about how each son felt and spend our time projecting ourselves into the story. I’m not saying that is not valid, but I am saying that we miss something if it’s the only way we ever think about this passage.
The anagogical meaning, a kind of “lifting upwards,” occurs when we are shown what it is we should desire, that is, the eternal happiness of the blessed.(St. Bonaventure, Mystic of God’s Word, 39)
Contemplating typology — that people or events in the Old Testament foreshadow or represent those in the New , or that a parable can be interpreted on a level that transcends the personal — can help us reach heights and depths of understanding and prayer, but we will never experience this profundity if we are always urged and even taught to see things as revolving around us, our needs, our brokenness, and our emotions.
In short, we will not be uplifted and led into goodness if we go the psychological route alone, if we ignore the traditional ways of entering into the spiritual realm. Its destructive destination is reached by imagining what a Biblical figure felt in a situation — innocent enough, and in a simplistic way, what St. Ignatius taught in his famous method of meditation. But when not corrected by other ways of reading, it ends in imagining that the sacred person felt what we feel.
But “my ways are not your ways” says the Lord!
Yes, it’s beautiful to contemplate the agony of the Lord in the Garden of Gethsemane; his feelings of abandonment, of friendlessness. But beware of the danger* of forgetting his divinity and thinking he was as ignorant of eternal matters as we are. Don’t speak of Mary as worrying or doubtful of God’s providence. Don’t refer to her as an unwed teen mom (which is counterfactual as well as vulgar). Don’t imagine that Joseph was a coward because you are a coward. these are all tropes I have seen, by the way — I didn’t make them up.
Holiness is otherness and we need to have reverence (awe and respect and yes, fear of the Lord). If every sacred thing becomes just an extension of our own pitiful existence, where will we turn to be led to a higher place? Most importantly, where will our children turn? We can’t teach what we don’t have.
I’ve been recording my notes on Instagram. Find my highlight called “dough process” for my tips.*From the Catechism, number 2146: “The second commandment forbids the abuse of God’s name, i.e., every improper use of the names of God, Jesus Christ, but also of the Virgin Mary and all the saints.”
{bits & pieces}Eric Sammons, editor of Crisis Magazine, interviewed me on the topic of the article I wrote with Leila Miller (linked within), and on feminism in general.The entire sexual revolution — and its aftermath, which includes sex education — is based on lies promoted by perverts. Does that sound like an extreme statement?
Well, see what you think after reading these two obituaries written in honor of the doughty Judith Reisman, “petite, jolly, tenacious, intense, righteous Jew, was relentlessly attacked by the sexual Left for her troubles. She was ostracized by academia. She was sued. She won. And Kinsey will never be the same.” Austin Ruse on The Little Lady Who Brought Down Alfred Kinsey.And RIP Judith Reisman, counter-revolutionary and founder of the anti-Kinsey movement.Reisman dedicated her life to exposing the poison of the porn industry and the fraud and sexual violence underpinning Alfred Kinsey’s work and legacy. She served as a research professor at Liberty University School of Law; completed a comprehensive analysis of child pornography in Playboy, Penthouse, and Hustler between 1986 and 1990 as a consultant to the United States Department of Justice; and testified about her findings around the world. The Reagan Justice Department gave her a large grant to study the impact of pornography. Her research has been instrumental in halting the spread of what she frequently called “Kinseyan sexuality”; as a result of her work, the British medical journal The Lancet called for the Kinsey Institute to be investigated for covering up sex crimes against children.http://radio.garden/visit/khasab/suj4...
Not sure what to make of this Radio Garden site, but you can go anywhere on the globe and listen to what’s being played on the radio!Dressing up in a 1898 Worth Ballgown (wish she had a maid to help her but oh well). I had reviewed Daniel Toma’s book Vestige of Eden, Image of Eternity here; I enjoyed this review as well. A reminder that this is a good book to give to one who has everything/is hard to buy for (cough Father’s Day cough cough). from the archivesAre you back to simple meals? Around here we are still getting chilly days (as in it snowed a not insignificant amount yesterday, after last week’s taste of warm glory): A frugal baked-bean supper can be just the thing!Want your kids to open up to you? Have them do dishes with you.liturgical livingfollow us everywhere!
My new “random thoughts no pictures” blog, Happy Despite Them — receive it by email if you like, or bookmark, so you don’t miss a thing!
Stay abreast of the posts here at LMLD, when they happen:
Consider subscribing to this blog by email. In the current situation, if we can’t meet here, it would be good for us to be connected by email!
We share pretty pictures: Auntie Leila’s Instagram, Rosie’s Instagram. Sukie’s Instagram. Deirdre’s Instagram. Bridget’s Instagram.
Auntie Leila’s Facebook (you can just follow)
The boards of the others: Rosie’s Pinterest. Sukie’s Pinterest. Deirdre’s Pinterest. Habou’s Pinterest (you can still get a lot of inspiration here! and say a prayer for her!). Bridget’s Pinterest.
The post To teach reverence we must be reverent appeared first on Like Mother Like Daughter.
April 10, 2021
Priorities
I have heard from so many people this spring that Covid restrictions left them so frustrated with “virtual learning” that they realized they would be better off homeschooling in earnest.
Excellent development.
It’s a big pivot, though. Going from serenely dropping your children off at school and having the day to yourself to taking on full responsibility for every detail of their education is a change that isn’t easy to accomplish in the space of a school year. Small wonder if you’re reeling…
If this is you and you are here because the rabbit hole tumbled you to our door, welcome!
And let me offer a particular bit of advice as you plan the coming academic year.
Put your marriage first. Put your husband first. And schedule a bit of rest into each day.
Homeschooling is exhausting. You must rest. Every day, take some time to sit and relax a bit; not to check things on your phone but to think, pray, and even read (shocking thought, I know).
A common temptation for a couple (and not only homeschooling couples) is to invest so much time and energy in the children and their education that their marriage is neglected.
They lose their enjoyment of each other and the day-to-day rituals and patterns that make life happy.
Since the mother usually has the responsibility of the myriad details of schooling, not to mention housekeeping, it’s the husband who can feel that he has lost his place in her heart.
He is nothing if not supportive and full of admiration for his wife’s ardor, study, and diligence. But not even a saint can help feeling that he is not his wife’s #1. Which he should be!
As we say, he’s funding the bliss!
But seriously, it’s a matter of good order. Where would the family be without the marriage? Nowhere. What is the point of frantic activity from morning until collapse at night? Nothing.
If the couple loses sight of each other, the result is that good things get pitted against each other — the good of their marriage and the good of the education of the children — which should not be. In fact, the two are one good! To enjoy unity and peace, keep things in their proper order.
I have written about this balance quite a bit. You might look at these posts to understand how to prevent obstacles in marriage and family life, or rather, how to make choices that give the family the best shot at happiness.
Some people just open all the tabs and go through one by one! I promise they will all be in the book!
If at the end of the day you feel not just tired but glazed and spread-eagled and tacked to a board, and each morning feels like the start to a new marathon that is heartbreak hills all the way, you must make it stop by planning a time of rest during the day. Schedule it in.
Trust me when I tell you that I took a nap every day when my children were young. Just an FYI: Quiet Time is an approved subject in Domus Academy (aka Home School).
“But my children will fall behind!” No, they won’t. A, we don’t know how children learn. B, it’s quite clear to me that when they do learn, it’s almost entirely unrelated to how much stress their mother has undergone to bring said learning about, unless it’s actually inversely proportional.
So, take a few minutes with your morning tea to plan your work so that you are not still going in the evening; make an effort to do the most difficult tasks early in the day. It’s one thing to fold laundry in the evening while you watch a show with your husband; it’s another to be washing the kitchen floor after bedtime because you couldn’t find time for your regular tasks during the day.
Marriage is a precious gift to mankind. Between the baptized it’s a sacrament that yields tremendous graces. Put your marriage first. Be generous, and put your marriage first.
{bits & pieces}Leila Miller and I wrote a piece for Crisis Magazine that reflects not only what we would like to see happen, but what we have seen happen with our own eyes when men take the lead (and women let them).Our friend Doug Mainwaring then wrote a piece that was on his mind — he was kind enough to say that we inspired him: Any men left in Major League Baseball? Airline cockpits? Corporate office suites?As happens occasionally, I stumbled across an old piece written by Fr. Mankowski: a review of a book about Flannery O’Connor. Can you imagine being the author and having this said about your book: “Hers is an entirely honorable accomplishment, and, while it doesn’t make the book worth buying, or reading, let it be reckoned unto her as righteousness.”?? Yikes… Scientists plan to drop the 14-day embryo rule, a key limit on stem cell research. Troubling to say the least. When a comment is posted that says “I’m 7 years late with this but… ” you have to look! Dear Monica shares how she came to set up her Little Oratory! If you have one, share it here in the comments or maybe on Instagram? use the hashtag LittleOratory if you would!Someone dug this article up from the distant past (2015) and now I’m posting it for you: The Economics Behind Grandma’s Tuna Casseroles — Don’t judge yesteryear’s cooking by today’s standards.Catholic martyrs’ bones identified almost 150 years after discovery in an atticYou can now order my friend Theresa Fagan’s A Mother’s List of Books here! Excellent article by Suzan Sammons: Locked-Down Women Discover True Freedom. Just remember: Rest, and put your husband first!from the archivesSimplify your life with your to-do list (spoiler: it should only have three things on it, according to highly efficient business executives)Roots and Wings. “What is the root? Your marriage. So dinner together (once the babies are old enough to be up) means that you and your husband sit down to dinner together, as many days as you can manage, and at least on Sundays.”Oxbow lakes and other obsessions in my homeschooling mindliturgical livingSaturday in the Octave of Easter
follow us everywhere!
My new “random thoughts no pictures” blog, Happy Despite Them — receive it by email if you like, or bookmark, so you don’t miss a thing!
Stay abreast of the posts here at LMLD, when they happen:
Consider subscribing to this blog by email. In the current situation, if we can’t meet here, it would be good for us to be connected by email!
We share pretty pictures: Auntie Leila’s Instagram, Rosie’s Instagram. Sukie’s Instagram. Deirdre’s Instagram. Bridget’s Instagram.
Auntie Leila’s Facebook (you can just follow)
The boards of the others: Rosie’s Pinterest. Sukie’s Pinterest. Deirdre’s Pinterest. Habou’s Pinterest (you can still get a lot of inspiration here! and say a prayer for her!). Bridget’s Pinterest.
The post Priorities appeared first on Like Mother Like Daughter.
April 3, 2021
A blessed Easter!
For real, no joking around, I hope and pray that you and your loved ones have a joyful and happy Easter!
I don’t think I will be making my usual Gateau Paris-Brest this year; I have something else I’m going to try that is too similar to have both. I will try to keep you posted on that.
I still have lots of cleaning and cooking to do, and then the Vigil! Mwah!
bits & piecesI have only one link for you, a very old-school sermon on an old-school site: Sermon 23 of St. John Henry Newman: Keeping Fast and Festival, preached on Easter Day.
On such a day, then, from the very intensity of joy which Christians ought to feel, and the trial which they have gone through, they will often be disposed to say little. Rather, like sick people convalescent, when the crisis is past, the illness over, but strength not yet come, they will go forth to the light of day and the freshness of the air, and silently sit down with great delight under the shadow of that Tree, whose fruit is sweet to their taste. They are disposed rather to muse and be at peace, than to use many words; for their joy has been so much the child of sorrow, is of so transmuted and complex a nature, so bound up with painful memories and sad associations, that though it is a joy only the greater from the contrast, it is not, cannot be, as if it had never been sorrow.
My (hardback, with a ribbon) copy of Newman’s sermons is well thumbed; it has stood me in good stead for 24 years now! At first, you may find Newman to be hard going, but read slowly and you will be well rewarded, spiritually.
I find that this sermon (not the only one he preached on this subject, of course) speaks to my state in these days — the sense of being battered and confused, of having undergone a purgation not of my choosing, and of being uncertain where the path lies.
As always, Newman keeps the heavenly realities well in view, unsentimentally and without denying earthly sorrow.
I hope it helps you if you are in the same frame of mind and spirit.
With love to you! Happy Easter, when we will proclaim: Christ is Risen!
liturgical livingfollow us everywhere!
My new “random thoughts no pictures” blog, Happy Despite Them — receive it by email if you like, or bookmark, so you don’t miss a thing!
Stay abreast of the posts here at LMLD, when they happen:
Consider subscribing to this blog by email. In the current situation, if we can’t meet here, it would be good for us to be connected by email!
We share pretty pictures: Auntie Leila’s Instagram, Rosie’s Instagram. Sukie’s Instagram. Deirdre’s Instagram. Bridget’s Instagram.
Auntie Leila’s Facebook (you can just follow)
The boards of the others:
Rosie’s Pinterest.
Sukie’s Pinterest.
Deirdre’s Pinterest.
Habou’s Pinterest (you can still get a lot of inspiration here! and say a prayer for her!).
Bridget’s Pinterest.
The post A blessed Easter! appeared first on Like Mother Like Daughter.
April 1, 2021
Happy Maundy Thursday!
Investment, Flat Design, IllustrationJust popping in quickly to wish everyone a blessed Triduum!
And to announce that I’ve set aside my Summa Domestica three-volume project indefinitely.
This decision was made because I have accepted a position as CEO/CFO of a small investment firm that specializes in maximizing the greatest possible returns for our investors, starting Monday!
I think my particular financial skills were a good fit for the company, called ModernVest.
And I’ve always wanted to use my gifts in a managerial and investment capacity; by joining the company, I will be overseeing a small staff of investors (mostly women) and utilizing my knowledge of the markets to provide returns on capital through best industry practices. It’s the sort of thing I’ve always been good at; I look forward to working with others and increasing my knowledge base.
So I won’t be here that much any more. But I know you will understand! It’s been fun!
The post Happy Maundy Thursday! appeared first on Like Mother Like Daughter.
March 27, 2021
{bits & pieces}
My life right now:
Minding these seedlings, needing desperately to clean this room (the parts not pictured, and the part pictured too, just doesn’t look like it online).
Almost done with final edits of volume 3 of The Summa Domestica.
New slip for family baptismal gown cut out; just needs to be sewn and embellished. (More on that later, I hope; it’s for Deirdre’s baby, due after Easter!)
Holy Week and Easter food plans yet unmade.
So… on to our links!
bits & piecesWere you aware of a huge tanker that is stuck across the Suez Canal, blocking it completely? Some photos from space showing the embarrassing and inconvenient (to say the least) problem. Reminds me of how moms of big families feel when they have to drive a Suburban down a narrow lane…Oldest woven basket in the world found in Israel, dates back 10,000 yearsShort article on the legacy of John Senior, a teacher who I venture to say, based on the fact that you are reading here on this blog, has influenced you, whether you know it or not. To be a craftsman — John CuddebackIn the course of the discussion about C. S. Lewis in last week’s post, I came across this article that I have linked to in the past, but it’s worth reading again (the title alone is inspiring!): The Greatness of Insignificant Service An overview of the rites of the pre-reformed Holy Week — how this liturgical season used to be celebrated.If you want to have a resource of statements and informative articles, go to this post on Happy Despite Themfrom the archivesliturgical livingSt. John Damascene, Doctor of the Church (old calendar)
follow us everywhere!My new “random thoughts no pictures” blog, Happy Despite Them — receive it by email if you like, or bookmark, so you don’t miss a thing!
Stay abreast of the posts here at LMLD, when they happen:
Consider subscribing to this blog by email. In the current situation, if we can’t meet here, it would be good for us to be connected by email!
We share pretty pictures: Auntie Leila’s Instagram, Rosie’s Instagram. Sukie’s Instagram. Deirdre’s Instagram. Bridget’s Instagram.
Auntie Leila’s Facebook (you can just follow)
The boards of the others:
Rosie’s Pinterest.
Sukie’s Pinterest.
Deirdre’s Pinterest.
Habou’s Pinterest (you can still get a lot of inspiration here! and say a prayer for her!).
Bridget’s Pinterest.
The post {bits & pieces} appeared first on Like Mother Like Daughter.
