Josh Langley's Blog, page 7

Are you prepared to run through life like the gate of normalcy has been left open?

When I was a kid, I was always getting in trouble for not paying attention, for daydreaming too much and for going off on little adventures in my mind.

But I loved it though… In my imagination there were no limits and no-one telling me what I can and can’t do.

However sadly most of us stop using our imagination, instead we get bogged down in the day to day mundaneness of life, work, obligations and cleaning the scum from the tiles in the shower. Urgh!

What I’ve found though, is that daydreaming, whether just letting your mind wander or actively imagining the life you want, helps you move forward… even just a little bit.

It’s one of the things I tell the kids in my school talks; never stop using your imagination, especially when you grow up. It’ll help you create the life you want to live.

Learn to dream big.

So often we settle for small dreams, subconsciously thinking we’re not worthy of anything amazing. But we are.

So are you prepared to let your imagination run a little wild and go on an crazy adventure? Are you prepared to recapture that untamed imagination of your childhood and run through life like the gate of normalcy has been left open?

I challenge you!

You can start here

Find Your Creative Mojo acquired by Penguin Random House South East Asia

I got an email on Monday from my publisher, Big Sky Publishing, saying that they had sold the territory rights for Find Your Creative Mojo to Penguin Random House South East Asia.

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This is huge news as the English language version of the book will now be available through all of Southeast Asia taking in Singapore, Malaysia, Thailand, Indonesia, Philippines, Vietnam, Cambodia, Myanmar, Brunei and Laos.

Even though the initial print run will be small and Penguin Random House SAE is managing expectations about sales, I’m over the moon because this is my first international book deal and I’m frigging excited!

The deal was secured by Denny from Big Sky Publishing at the Frankfurt Book Fair in October.

[image error]The Big Sky Publishing booth at the Frankfurt Book Fair







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Next Mojo Workshop

In the meantime, the next Find Your Creative Mojo workshop (based on the book) will be part of Bunbury Summer School at the Stirling Street Arts Centre. Friday January 10 from 3 to 4.30. Book here

“Back by popular demand, this workshop is designed to inspire any budding creative person to find their self expression and run with it. Learn to face your fears, overcome procrastination and self doubt to take the first vital steps in uncovering your creative side.  Based on the book by award winning author and illustrator Josh Langley. Josh and writer, poet and thinker Andy Macleod take you on a funny and insightful journey of creative discovery.”

I look forward to seeing you there.

From the boardroom to the playground, The unconventional life of a children’s author on tour.

A few years ago, I decided to ditch my award winning radio advertising job, and shortly afterwards starting taking the message of my children’s book, ‘Being You is Enough’ to primary school kids across Western Australia.

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So instead of boardroom niceties, I’ve now get called fat, told I’m old and a liar and I get farted at on regular occasions.

Even though that wasn’t in the job description of being a touring children’s author, I wouldn’t swap it for the world.

People have this idea that children’s authors sit in a big easy
chair reading their book to a bunch of wide eyed 8-year olds, and then go home
to have a polite cup of camomile. That’s what I used to think anyway.  

However, for me (and most other kid’s authors I know), the reality is very different.

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When I visit schools, I’m a travelling one-man band; part Vaudeville act, part stand-up comedian, part motivational speaker and part PowerPoint genius.

I have to be.

21st Century Kids

Kids are savvy these days, they want to be entertained.

When I first started doing this gig, I sought the advice of
a schoolteacher with 40 years’ experience.

‘Mix it up, keep kids engaged by incorporating different elements into your presentation’.  

That’s why I use PowerPoint, a superhero cape, a whistle, stories, questions and a drawing activity where I get students to share what they have drawn.

Then I use funny voices, acting, dancing and clowning around, to make it as entertaining as possible. I couldn’t do that in a boardroom full of clients!

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But for me, the magic lies in weaving into the presentation, important key messages from my books, to help kids thrive in this world.

Even cool kids have to poo. it’s Ok to be different. There’s always someone you can talk to.The power of creativity and imagination.How to make friends with your emotions.And being you is enough.



Kids don’t have a filter

Kids can spot bullshit a mile away and will call it out (often across the room), that’s why I love their unpredictability.

There’s a point in my presentation when I discuss it’s Ok to
be different and I ask the students, ‘What’s different about me?’

Now for your sake, I’m short, standing at only 5’2”, and I don’t
want the kids to be afraid to say it. However, it’s the random answers I love.  ‘You’re old’, ‘you’re fat’ and ‘you have a
funny lump between your eyes’.

[image error]The 5s and 6s almost dwarf me!



Snot, Farts and other fun stuff

In this role you have to be prepared for anything, such as;

The kid in the second row picking his nose and eating it. The random fart that pops out (from the kids, not me). The boisterous kid repeatedly calling out what he’s having for lunch. The kid who gets up from his EA (Education Assistant) and stands beside me looking stressed and anxious. The over enthusiastic kid who has their hand up for ages wanting to tell me about the one time their sister fell off a swing which had nothing to do with what we were talking about. Then there’s the school TV or projector that refuses to work, meaning you have go to old school and wing it. Also, the time when no-one prints off the worksheets, when no one organises the pencils, and when no one mentions I was coming at all. It’s all happened.  



Non gender specific times we live in

I started out doing the presentations innocently addressing
the kids as ‘young boy’ and ‘young girl’, however I very quickly learned, never
assume the sex of person by the way they look.

A few embarrassing moments have taught me to be alert,
always.

I now don’t use any indicator of sex at all, which I find
quite freeing. I can allow the child to be who they are without me assuming
anything about them.

The staff room

The school staff room is a sacred space, with staff coffee
cups completely off limits to outsiders.

If Mrs Slaberswaite from Room 5 catches you using her late ‘90s Far Side mug, you’ll get the evil eye.  

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The guest cups are always under the sink next to the dishwashing
liquid.

Children’s Book Council of Australia Book Week.

This year’s book week tour last August saw me drive over 1,100
kms, present to over 2,000 kids at 17 schools, and eat too much junk food,
including an overpriced greasy sausage roll.

It was exhausting, but well worth it.

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I mean seriously, in what other job would you get mobbed for your autograph, receive random hugs, get to be silly in public while wearing a cape, and tell people “It’s Ok to be different”?  

Advertising boardroom, or ‘Being you is enough’ with snot and farts? The latter is a lot more fun!

The suicide attempt I didn’t tell anyone about

As part of WA Mental Health week, I’ve plucked up the courage to share my personal story. If reading it triggers anything in you, please reach out and talk to someone. Contact numbers are at the end of the article.

A life not worth living

When I was 15, I tried to take my own life.

I stuffed a whole bunch of Valium, that I’d stolen from my Dad’s bedside drawer, into my gob and swallowed them all. I’d already written a note to say how sorry I was for everything and I went to bed.

Without realising it, it seemed a childhood punctuated with parental mental health issues, threats of suicide, angry outbursts, fighting, arguing, divorce, emotional and physical neglect, abandonment, fear and feelings of complete unworthiness, had taken their toll.  

The sad thing is, I thought everyone’s family was like mine and I was just weak and should harden up. My lived experience of an unhappy childhood was normal to me. I didn’t know otherwise.

Issues? What issues?

When I casually mentioned to a work colleague, that when I
was 14, I was left alone to fend for myself 23 out of 24 hours of the day, he
was surprised that I didn’t have abandonment issues. I’d never heard of the
term.

Thankfully on that night back when I was 15, I’d only taken
enough Valium to sedate a small kitten, so I woke up a little more bleary eyed
than normal.

So what did I do next? Did I reach out for help? Did I talk
to anyone about how I was feeling?

No. I screwed up the note and went to school as normal,
feeling ashamed and embarrassed. How could I even possibly think about drawing so
much attention to myself? I wasn’t important.

Fast forward to today and those feelings of unworthiness walk beside me every day. 

Acknowledging Childhood Trauma

I recently took the Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACES) test developed by the Centre for Disease Control and Prevention in the US to measure levels of Childhood trauma.

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Only 12.5% of participants scored 4 or higher, I got 5 out of 10.

For someone who was so unaware of how his childhood
situation was affecting his life, I was off the scale.  

Daydreaming to escape

I know I disappeared into the safe world of my imagination
to escape a stressful childhood, but I didn’t realise it had a name, dissociative
amnesia.

“Most mental health professionals believe that the underlying cause of dissociative disorders is chronic trauma in childhood. Examples of trauma included repeated physical or sexual abuse, emotional abuse or neglect. Unpredictable or frightening family environments may also cause the child to ‘disconnect’ from reality during times of stress.”

– Better Health Victoria (https://www.betterhealth.vic.gov.au/health/conditionsandtreatments/dissociation-and-dissociative-disorders)

I now understand why I spent so much time in my dream world
and thus have a very patchy memory of childhood. I’m a Pisces as well so
daydreaming came naturally.

Childhood trauma gets stuck into your bones, into your very
being, however because of my dissociation, I didn’t know how deep it had gone.

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Whenever a painful memory popped up, I instantly pushed it back down again. I pushed everything down, clear out of sight and carried on with life. I never spoke about my past with anyone apart from my husband. It wasn’t important. I wasn’t important.

A life worth living

But when I unexpectedly found myself at the age of 44 writing children’s books with a central theme of going back to tell my younger self that he was unconditionally loved, I knew I could no longer ignore the hurt little boy who I’d left behind all those years ago.  

So now with the help of a good therapist, I’m bringing him
home and there’s one message that he needs to hear.

So I made sure the last page of my new kid’s book, Magnificent Mistakes and Fantastic Failures, included something that would have made all the difference to my younger self.

“You are important to the world”

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And I hope it makes a difference other kids too.

You are important to the world.

I also think it’s a message my parents needed to hear as they had pretty stuffed up childhoods too.

You are important to the world.

I know I’m not the only adult who had hidden their suicide attempt, so this is for you too.

You are important to the world.

And for you, reading this…

You are important to the world.

If you, or anyone you know, needs support, please call a helpline such as Lifeline 13 11 14; beyondblue 1300 224 636; Mental Health Emergency Response Line 1300 555 788 (Metro) or 1800 676 822 (Peel); Rurallink 1800 552 002; Suicide Call Back Service 1300 659 467; The Samaritans Crisis Line 08 9381 5555.

Take the ACE test yourself. https://www.npr.org/sections/health-shots/2015/03/02/387007941/take-the-ace-quiz-and-learn-what-it-does-and-doesnt-mean

Schools, Prisons, Podcasts, Interviews, Guest judging, Guest Speaker and Wildflowers… It’s all part of a #writerslife

Life has a way of sneaking up on you.

I’d always wanted my #writerslife to be full and overflowing with opportunities to meet new people, to visit new places, share my books and talk to kids and adults about what matters in life. And make money while doing it.

So while I was busy over the last few months, meeting new people, visiting new places, sharing my books and talking to kids and adults about what matters in life, (and being paid for it) I realised I was already in the thick of living this extraordinary life I’d wanted.

From speaking to inmates at Bunbury Regional Prison about writing and publishing, to guest judging for the SoapBox public speaking competition for primary school kids.

From touring 17 odd schools for Book Week to guest speaker at Rockingham Writers Convention, to running two workshops in Margaret River and a Happy Kids workshop in Bunbury with Joelene Lavrick.

To being on several podcasts and interviewed by some amazing people to having my books showcased at the Bunbury Regional Art Gallery.

And getting to meet some of the most amazing people. From the aboriginal prisoner who wants to write a children’s book to give to his own kids, to the inspiring young author Imani who off her own back, interviewed dozens of WA authors for her Booktober event.

Real Life isn’t like TV

The life I wanted had turned into the life I was living in a very undramatic way. No fanfare, no golden buzzer moments, no explosions of gold sparkly bits and no cheering crowds.

Just the quiet unassuming transition from possibility to reality. That’s why some people miss it.

So what’s the secret to making the life you want happen? This works for me.

Hold your dream gently in your hand.Do something to move towards it. Make stuff, write stuff, post stuff, learn stuff. Be prepared to go out of your way. Be open to all possibilities. Keeping doing stuff. Be curious about where it might lead.

Nothing happens if you only sit on the couch dreaming.

This is my #writerslife in action.

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And the most important aspect to this is #writerslife is that I’m constantly amazed and grateful for every minute of it.

Getting diagnosed with GAD and how it’s changing my life.

I’d never heard of Generalised Anxiety Disorder until recently. I’d heard of all the other ones; social anxiety, separation anxiety, panic disorders and of course phobias, but generalised anxiety no… it just seemed a little too generalised!

I didn’t have panic attacks and run out of shopping centres (Ok in hindsight maybe there was that one time at Galleria) and I wasn’t crumpling in a sobbing heap at social functions, unless I was horribly drunk.

I was normal, I didn’t have anxiety.

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I thought everyone had a love hate relationship with their internal monologue. I thought everyone had a meltdown when the phone rang, I though everyone was tense all the time and had trouble relaxing. I thought everyone worried about everything. I thought everyone couldn’t stop fidgeting. I thought that everyone in Buddhist meditation class couldn’t count to three breaths before losing concentration like me! I was normal… wasn’t I?

I thought everyone was the
same.

As it turns out, they
weren’t.

The Doctors Visit

I’d gone to the doctor to get a referral to see a therapist as I’d felt it was time to deal with some childhood issues. I had a sneaking suspicion they were affecting me in someway but not sure how. It was most probably minor but better to ask a professional anyway. The Doctor asked me how my life was, and I told him, ‘It’s great, I’m in a wonderful relationship, I’m a published author, I run my own business.’

He then asked me to describe my thought processes and if I ever felt anxious at times. After giving him a broad overview of my childhood, insight into my mental machinations and family history of mental health issues, he nodded and said quite confidently that I had GAD and it was obviously related to my unresolved issues from childhood.

Then I saw it on the referral notes. “Generalised Anxiety Disorder stemming from unresolved childhood trauma”. Shit just got real. I was now officially on a mental health care plan.

According to Better
Health Victoria about 5% of the population has GAD.

“Generalised anxiety disorder affects about five per cent of the population and onset can be at an early age – one third of people with GAD experience onset in childhood or adolescence. GAD may occur following a stressful life event or a period of high stress. It is more likely to develop if a person is predisposed to high anxiety due to a combination of genetic factors and environmental influences. – Better Health Victorian Government website” https://www.betterhealth.vic.gov.au/health/HealthyLiving/Generalised-anxiety-disorder

Symptoms: (I’ve italicized the key ones that really apply to me)



Persistent worrying or anxiety about a number of areas that are out of proportion to the impact of the eventsOverthinking plans and solutions to all possible worst-case outcomesPerceiving situations and events as threatening, even when they aren’tDifficulty handling uncertaintyIndecisiveness and fear of making the wrong decisionInability to set aside or let go of a worryInability to relax, feeling restless, and feeling keyed up or on edgeDifficulty concentrating, or the feeling that your mind “goes blank”



Physical signs and symptoms may include:



FatigueTrouble sleepingMuscle tension or muscle achesTrembling, feeling twitchyNervousness or being easily startledSweatingNausea, diarrhea or irritable bowel syndromeIrritability

Source: https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/generalized-anxiety-disorder/symptoms-causes/syc-20360803

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Looking back across the fabric of my life, I realised I’ve had GAD since I was very young, however my desire to make people happy and be a people pleaser, disguised what was going on underneath. I unintentionally did everything in my power to keep it suppressed. I didn’t want to trouble anyone with my feelings, let alone draw any attention to them. So, on the surface, I was always the happy kid with lots of friends, but underneath I was hiding emotional and psychological trauma and also the quiet realisation that I might be gay. But that’s another topic altogether.

Journey to healing



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Writer Joseph Campbell said, “the cave you fear to enter, holds the treasure that you seek”. Hence, I’m entering my own cave. I no longer want my past and my anxiety to dictate my life. I’m not a big fan of labels, so I’m hoping to let go of the GAD label (and it’s causes) for good.

So I’ve started seeing a psychotherapist to help unpack some of the issues that have resulted in having Generalised Anxiety Disorder and working through them. I’m extremely lucky that my therapist doesn’t just deal with head stuff, he’s a firm believer in working with the whole body and the mind to heal trauma. He’s turned my preconceived notions upside down about what trauma is, how it affects us and how to heal from it. So far it’s paying off. It’s hard work, at times ugly work, but if it brings me closer to my real self, then it’s all worth it. I’ll be writing a lot more on this journey in a more expanded version sometime in the future.

[image error]Some of art therapy I’m doing.



Glad to have
GAD

Now I understand myself and my behaviours a lot better. Instead of beating myself up, thinking I was useless because I couldn’t focus or pay attention to any one thing or for the amount of mistakes I’d make or my floundering in indecision all the time, I can take a step back and see the bigger ‘why’ picture and be more compassionate towards myself.

(It’s funny how I’ve subconsciously referred to anxiety in It’s OK to Feel the Way You Do and indirectly talk about it in the new kids book, Magnificent Mistakes and Fantastic Failures, Finding the good when things seem bad. Now that I think about it, I discuss anxiety in Find Your Creative Mojo and if you cast a critical eye across Dying to Know and Turning Inside Out you’ll see my anxiety pop up all over the place!)

One of the other upsides to having GAD is how it helps me relate to other people and especially kids. It makes me a more understanding and compassionate writer and communicator as I know what it’s like to have it and to feel the downstream mental effects. To feel like you’re dumb, useless, inadequate and a bit of a thicko. These are very real feelings you have when you can’t function effectively and you feel your own weighty judgement come down upon you.

But it doesn’t always have to be that way. Once we understand how anxiety shows up for us individually and how it’s affecting us, we can learn to be gentler on ourselves and then look at the root causes if it.

Even though I’m on the lower end of the anxiety scale, the more garden variety version, I won’t let it define me. It’s not a bad thing, I haven’t failed in anyway, I’m not a lesser person because of it, I’m just me, being shown some things I need to explore and investigate.

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It’s important for people to know they’re not alone in what they’re experiencing and that there is healing and hope available.

By being brave, staying curious and being willing to explore the depths of what is causing our anxiety, we can hopefully come out the other side closer to being the person who we really are.

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Now lets get back to writing books.

NB: If anything here has triggered something for you, I urge you to talk to someone. Make an appointment to see your GP and have a chat. If I can be brave enough to do it, then so can you.

A simple way to help your kids understand their emotions

Have you ever got angry? What about cried over losing a good friend? And I’m sure you’ve been scared once or twice in your life too?

Well, guess what, your kids have the exact same emotions and feelings as you do and will go on to keep having them. However they’re less likely to be able to process them as well as an adult can. So, who’s better equipped at helping them navigate the often stormy waters of emotions than the ones who love them the most and who wants to see them thrive?

You.

There really are only two key ingredients to discussing
emotions (big or small) with your kids and they are:

1: Letting them know they’re not alone in how they’re
feeling.

2: And getting them to talk about how their feeling and discuss
any issues that arise. 

Sure, if there are some bigger issues at play, then a child
psychologist or counsellor is best, but if it’s entry level, get to know your
emotions stuff, then you as the parent is more than qualified.

Often though, we find so called negative emotions difficult to cope with and we just want to push them aside. They’re too hard, too scary and too inconvenient. We’re afraid of being swamped by a tsunami of feelings, our own, as well as other people’s.

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I can understand why. As a society, we’re not taught to be
comfortable with our emotions. We’re not taught about them in school, our
parents usually didn’t have a clue and advertising and the media only exploited
them, so they could make money off us.

But if there’s something that binds every single human being
together on this planet, it’s our emotions. We all have them, it’s part of
being human. The good ones and the so called bad ones (which aren’t really bad
at all).

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The key to being a happy healthy, well rounded human being
is to make friends with all of our emotions. Recognise them, acknowledge them
and notice how they feel and let them move through you like a bag of prunes. If
at any point we start to suppress, push down or hold them in, they’ll stay with
us and cloud how we see the world for the rest of our life. I know that from
personal experience, and I think you do too.

When I had the opportunity to write my kid’s book on emotions, ‘It’s Ok to Feel The Way You Do’ I approached it from the angle  “What would I tell my younger self about emotions and feelings that I know now?’

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I’ve felt sadness, anger, loneliness, pride and anxiety and
all the rest of the emotional range yet I’ve always tried to be comfortable
with them. They’re a part of me, so why would I deny them? I want to thrive in
this world, not just survive. Who wouldn’t want to share that with their
7-year-old self?

You have the same experience with emotions as I do. Don’t be afraid to tap onto your own experiences to help your kids be the best they can.

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You most probably already are doing these suggestions, but this what I’ve heard from parents that works well and they kind of just make sense.

Sit when your child and let them know what
they’re feeling is real. Try and avoid the urge fix anything. Let them know that they’re safe and allow them
to talk about what and how they’re feeling. Tell them that you have felt the same feelings as
well. It lets them know they’re not alone and that you’re human too. Ask them to notice how it feels in their body. –
what does it feel like? This helps them recognise feelings earlier when they
occur. Maybe they can draw a picture. Sit with them, be with them. Remind them that all
things will eventually pass.

By getting kids to understand and make friends with all their feelings, they’ll hopefully grow into adults who are better equipped to thrive in a rapidly changing world. And the world will be a much better place for it.

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‘Ok to Feel the Way You Do‘ is available from Dymocks,  Booktopia, Book Depository

How to feel less overwhelmed and more centered

It was 2 o’clock in the afternoon and I had remembered something I needed to check on Google. I opened the laptop and out of habit launched Facebook instead and started scrolling through the news feed. Almost immediately I could feel myself forgetting what I was supposed to be doing. Then bang, one more finger scroll past a stupid cat meme and it was gone.  It took only 10 seconds for me to forget what I opened the laptop for.  

This is part of the problem we’re facing today.

But it’s not only the fact we so distracted and our attention spans are getting shorter than that of a goldfish, we are also overwhelmed by the sheer stupidity of what’s going on in the world. If you’re aware enough you can feel yourself being tossed around emotionally and psychologically by social media and its flow on effects. There’s the racist meme your uncle shared, the political ad that keeps coming up and you know is complete rubbish or some click bait headline where the lines between real and fake are so blurred even you don’t even know what’s real or not (and you’ve even done the research).

And it’s not restricted to the internet either. Politicians, special interest groups, TV and even Joan in payroll at your office, now see legitimacy in this new golden age of bullshit and distraction. And once where we tried to avoid topics like politics and religion at dinner parties, it now seems an innocent meal with friends and family can feel more like being on the panel of ABC TV’s Q and A.

[image error] (I even got distracted by Facebook, Googling this gif

The sheer amount of uninvited opinions, self-important outrage, the right to be easily offended and the constantly shifting sands of reality can be completely overwhelming, even for relatively well adjusted people. In a world where we’re meant to be more connected than ever, most of us just want to run and hide.

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However, in this Golden Age of Bullshit and Distraction, there is something we can do.

There is hope for us.

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Six years ago, I went totally off the grid for 30 days as part of an experiment I undertook for my book, Turning Inside Out: What if everything we’ve taught about life is wrong? I wanted to test some ideas I had about how to live a better, more focused life and the results were pretty astonishing.

Now in 2019 there’s even more distraction than before when I ran the experiment, so I thought it would be a perfect time to revisit what I discovered (and still try and use today with varying degrees of success) and share it with you. I’ve slightly updated it from what was in the book, but the key points are the same.

5 suggestions for living a more centered, calmer life.

1. Notice when you get distracted and bring your attention back to your body.

Be aware of how different distractions pull your energy and attention away from you. Bring your attention back into yourself when you feel pulled out. Notice your body. How does it feel? Distractions can include social media, news, gossip, opinions and judgements that have nothing  to do with you. Feel your feet on the ground. Spend more time looking out your own window than looking at social media. Remember to still be light and playful about it all. Notice if you feel any calmer.

2. Do more of what feels right.

Spend more time doing stuff that feels right to you. Activities that uplift and bring you joy. Such as creative expression, spending time in nature, listening to music, walking, going to museums or art galleries or eating Tortellini. Write a list and stick it on the fridge.

Be neutral about things you don’t
want to do or don’t like. If you find yourself complaining, notice what it sounds
like and how it makes you feel. Resist the urge to post it on social media. As
they say, what you resist persists.

3. Trust everything will be fine.

Let go of the mental worry about situations and trust that they will work out for the best. I know all about anxiety as I’ve have lived with Generalised Anxiety Disorder all my life and I know that making the effort to change my wayward thinking actually helps.

These days we seem to reinforce
each other’s anxiety instead finding ways to work through it or heal from it
all together.

Life is too short to spend it as a nervous wreck.

4. Recognise fear.

When you feel fear and physical tightness, pause and look at what it’s all about. Where is it from? Is it a real or imagined fear? If it’s imagined, then it’s okay to move through it.

You’ll be fine.

Be brave, you can do it.

5. Notice subtle movements in your body, along with feelings and sensations. Also look for signs and synchronous events.

A lot of information comes to us non-verbally
so you need to practise learning how to read the signs and take note. Being
less distracted by things that don’t matter will make it easier for you to pick
up signs and subtle hints and suggestions from the universe.

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Escaping the existential distress

This exercise is not about running away or escaping reality. Far from it, it’s about connecting to what is more real than anything – You. If it’s escaping anything, it’s the existential distress caused by behemoth companies deliberately manipulating your emotions and attention so they can harvest your data and sell you shit you don’t need.

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It’s about anchoring yourself in the here and now and discovering how wonderful life can be. It’s about keeping life simple and prioritising what is important to you.

What about the kids?



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If we as adults are so distracted and overwhelmed, then how do you think that is making our kids feel? As I’ve heard over again, anxious parents make anxious kids. We owe it to the next generation to show them what really matters; being present, being honest, being kind and being genuine.

Spending time in a safari chair.

I don’t claim to be an expert in any of this as I’m still always working on it myself but there are things that I find work for me and they might for you too.

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After I started to have sessions with my therapist, I’ve changed my morning routine. It involves checking emails and social media for 20 minutes as that’s how I connect with most of my readers and followers. Then I spend 30 minutes chilling back in one of the safari chairs my Dad passed on to me (they were apparently smuggled from the US to Canada in the late 60’s) and I’ve got a cup of hellishly delicious coffee and some a music from Insight Timer playing in the background. I don’t do anything except sit there and let the world come to me. It’s one of my happy places.

As I’ve discovered through experience, life is too short to spend it being overwhelmed and living as a nervous wreck. Life can actually be incredibly beautiful and I don’t want to miss out on that.

I hope you feel the same.

Cover reveal for new kid’s book on resilience

Ever wondered what a book on resilience looks like, when it’s written by someone who has no background in education, no psychology degree, or by someone who doesn’t even have kids? Well Magnificent Mistakes and Fantastic Failures; Finding the good when things go bad is a refreshingly different book on resilience that I hope will inspire kids to find the courage to go bravely into world.

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Feedback on social media for the cover and book concept has been amazing. 

“Omg omg I love this. Another for my resource collection”
“The giraffe is just adorable!”
“Love it. Pre order copy when available please”
“LOVE the cover! And I’m sure the content will be just as wonderful!”
“Awesome cover. Love the title”
“Love it Josh, what a fun cover. Still think the title is excellent too
“Love the cover Josh. Looks like a great addition to the series.”

Back and front cover:

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With resilience being the number one topic for parents and educators at the moment, I wanted to tackle the subject in my own unique way, give it the ‘Josh Langley’ treatment. Because I don’t have an educational background, I’m not a psychologist or an expert in the field, I can come at resilience from a very simple angle and use my own personal, lived experience as inspiration. I was pretty good at making mistakes, getting into trouble and failing at a few things! 

Book Blurb:

In his new book, award winning children’s author Josh Langley, gives kids the tools to find their own inner resilience. By turning conventional thinking on its head; he shows that mistakes and failures can be opportunities for learning and growth. Good friends, positive self-talk, curiosity and wonder become a perfect mix to give children a confident perspective on life. Josh also helps kids’ identify and focus on what they like doing and what they’re good at, giving them the foundations to step bravely into the world and to try new things. Magnificent Mistakes and Fantastic Failures; Finding the good when things go bad is the book about resilience we all wish we had a kid.

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Magnificent Mistakes and Fantastic Failures; Finding the good when things go bad will be in all good bookshops around Australia by March 2020 and published through Big Sky Publishing.

Early review copies will be available. To be notified email jodee@bigskypublising.com.au

What happens when you meet your idol.

It’s not often I’m lost for words. I mean I use them for a living. I do talks and workshops, I write books, articles and try and do facebook posts without any typos – I can’t afford to be lost for words! However for the first time in my life I found myself looking like a stunned mullet with mouth gaping.

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Let’s back up a bit. I was invited to run a Find Your Creative Mojo Workshop and be a panel member at the Margaret River Readers and Writers Festival and when the final line up was released I squealed like a school girl.

One of the few people I look up to and admire was also on the line up, writer, cartoonist and Australian Living Treasure, Michael Leunig. He was featured right next to me on the official website and program (as it was in alphabetical order Langley/ Leunig). It’s not often you get to be on the same page as your idol, but also right next to him on the page is even better! It also helped that my husband Andy Macleod was on the same row!

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I manged to get into Michael’s sold out session as I’d never heard him talk live before, and I found myself nodding to everything he said. Even the way he drew his little sketches and used simple lines to completely change emotions, I felt it was familiar. It was because that’s what I do. It was like I was watching myself up there in a strange freaky way. However a much wiser, older, taller and thinner version.

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Not that I want to compare myself to the high caliber of Michael, but everything he said, I already felt, thought and was doing. So I thought.

But there was one massive thing he gave me that I hadn’t counted on.

Permission.

Permission to keep doing what I do and in the way that I do it. I know I tell that to other people, but I had Michael Leunig tell that to me. He gave me permission to put my doubts aside. And that my work has it’s place.

I had known, since the program had come out that I couldn’t leave the festival without a autograph, so I grabbed the program and left the session as the applause died down and waited in line.

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How do I explain the kind of impact he’s had on me? Do I show him my books? Do I bring him a gift? Do I shake his hand? What does one do in situations like this? I wanted to be all cool and smooth about it but sadly the reality ended up being very different.

As it came to my turn I was still paralyzed by all those thoughts. So when I got to speak to him, all I could do was mumble something about inspiring me and giving me permission to do what I did, which to him could have been making cakes or trying out for realty TV shows as far as he knew.

So I pulled out the festival program and pointed to my picture and then to his picture and said ‘This is me and this is you”. I felt like the biggest doofus. Then something went off in his mind and he looked me and then back at the program and where my verbal mumblings had failed, my gestures had come to the rescue.

He said “oh, oh, that’s you.. Hang on, let me read your description”. While he read he put his finger on the first line and continued “I failed high school twice too” and he smiled and laughed.

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My heart melted on the spot…. I was lost even more. So I quickly asked him to autograph the page and for a selfie. Still feeling like a doofus I thanked him again and fled.

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However there was one extra thing that he taught me. He always referred to his work as ‘my work’. As though what he did was always good enough to be classed as ‘his work’, like a craft, a piece of art, an expression of himself. Of which it all is. It’s not a sideline project or venture, not a side hustle. Not a hobby. Nothing to be downplayed. Whereas I’ve never referred to what I do as ‘my work’ choosing other ways to describe it .. But now I will call it that. Thank you Michael Leunig.

Welcome to my work.

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