Josh Langley's Blog, page 10
June 6, 2018
The illusion of self confidence.
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Even though I include the topic of self confidence in the flyer for my school talks, I don’t mention it anywhere in the actual presentation. I’ve come to realise self confidence is an illusion.
We’re led to believe that self confidence is some ‘thing’ that we’re all meant to have and if we don’t then we’re lacking in some way. And because we ‘lack self-confidence’, we’re not whole, not a complete person. We’re weak and will never achieve anything.
However, self-confidence is not a thing. It’s not something that can be inserted into your personality and suddenly you’re George Clooney and you can walk into a Royal Wedding like your own that shit.
I was listening to a Tim Ferris Podcast and the person he was interviewing was talking about self-confidence and she was able to articulate what I’d always felt, but couldn’t put into words. Everyone of us starts out not knowing how to do something, then we give it a go and we do it again. We get better at it, until we’re more familiar and comfortable with whatever the task is. We become more confident in doing that task.
Practise make progress.
Simple. It’s not some innate skill that George Clooney has that we don’t.
You just have to start. Take that first step. Then take another and another. Become familiar with it.
The first time I visited a school to do a presentation, I had no idea what I was doing, and I’d never even spoken to primary school kids since back when I was one myself. But I jumped in a did 6 sessions one after the other. I asked for feedback, fine tuned things a bit and kept going. Now after doing 40 school visits, I can walk into a classroom with the same confidence that George has walking into a Royal Wedding. I still get nervous (you never get rid of that) but at least I have a vague idea of what I’m doing.
You don’t need self confidence to start something, you just need to start. Confidence comes when you’re doing it. When you’re familiar with it.
Just start. Push through and keep going.
That’s how you develop self confidence.
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Find Your Creative Mojo: How to overcome fear, procrastination and self-doubt to express your true self is due for release in September 2018. You can preorder now by emailing josh@outsidecreative.com.au.
May 28, 2018
What to do when self-doubt creeps in like a stray cat to ransack the biscuits..
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People often say that because I do so much stuff I can’t possibly doubt myself.
Yes, I can write books, I can pitch to publishers, I can spend an entire day talking to over 200 school kids, I can sit on stage and be interviewed at writer’s festivals, I’m not afraid to enter my photography into competitions, and yes I can risk everything to quit my job and start my own business.
But do I have doubt? Shit yes.
Every day I doubt what the hell I’m doing.
That’s how I know I’m alive.
Riding the ragged edge of doubt where every sinister voice in your head is telling you that what you’re about to do is the most foolish thing you’ve ever done and still doing it, regardless of the potential ridicule, is the most exciting and bravest acts you can do for yourself.
We’re conditioned to live life in the safe zone, where nothing happens except losing a few more brain cells watching Love Island Australia. And that’s only after we’ve come home exhausted working a day job we barely enjoy, to pay for the house we only live in for a few hours a day.
A life of safe zones, monotony and idle gossip doesn’t make for an interesting one. You don’t find adventure by sitting on the couch watching Home and Away. You don’t find your own voice, by living through someone elses.
At times, the stray cat of doubt does hold me back from pushing through with a project or an idea, but as soon as I think of the alternative, something snaps, and I go ahead and make it happen anyway. I realise I have nothing to lose.
I can sit in my own fear and continue to question my abilities and stare at the potential ridicule and failures or I could simply say ‘fuck it’ and go ahead. I have no idea what I’m doing anyway, so if it goes pear shaped, I can try something different.
Doubt is part of the creation process. It’s the hi octane biofuel you need to power your projects and endeavours. If you don’t have doubt, then you’re not creating anything worthwhile. You’re still in a boring and stale comfort zone.
So when you sense the stray cat of self doubt come sneaking in, look into its eyes and give it a biscuit before it ransacks your entire secret stash of Tim Tams and undermines your confidence. You’re the one in control here.
Feel the doubt, pause and push through.
You’re about to make magic and your life will be richer for it.
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‘Find Your Creative Mojo – How to Overcome Fear, procrastination and self-doubt to express your true self’ will be out in September through Big Sky Publishing.
May 14, 2018
What if our opinions are wrong?
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It’s easy to have an opinion.
Everyone has them. They’re thrown around like knickers at a Tom Jones concert. And sadly, opinions seem to be the only currency of most social media posts and news organisation sites. A clickbait cocaine infused rush of righteous indignation and outrage is now the only way to generate interest and reaction. Someone coined it ‘outrage porn’.
All for what? Content and engagement for the purposes of eventually selling you something… either your data or a pair of the latest sensation in soft soled shoe technology that will apparently change your life.
It’s much harder (and it seems socially unacceptable) to want or try to understand someone or something. To be the voice of reason. Instead we’re asked to be judge, jury and executioner in one swift click of an icon.
We’re being told that our opinions matter even on things that have nothing to do with us. We get all upset and indignant about things we normally wouldn’t either care about or even know about.
A woman in Armenia uses dog poo as a hair conditioner and were all suddenly outraged sending an avalanche of opinions into cyberspace about a what terrible person she is and with some people even calling for the banning of dog poo or even her execution.
Sadly, we don’t even need facts or even a modicum of truth to have an opinion anymore. The idea of an informed and educated opinion has gone the way of the dodo… all you need is a dodgy photoshop image or a misspelled meme and next minute we’re all expert enough to offer an opinion no matter how stupid or vile it is.
It’s no wonder we’re all pots of simmering anger, resentment and indignation ready to boil over at the mere sight of a meme with the words ‘click like and share’. And like good citizens, we do just that, spread the anger, hatred, mistruths and ill-informed opinions without even thinking for ourselves.
Maybe I’ve got it wrong.
Maybe my opinion is wrong.
Maybe my opinion is based on half truths that I was told by someone else who had no idea what they were talking about.
Maybe I should shut up and sit quietly.
Maybe all these opinions only put up barriers between me and the rest of the world.
Barriers between me and you.
Really, the only thing between me and you…. is my opinion.
Maybe if I was brave enough for just one moment, to drop my opinion and see with open eyes and an open heart, I might discover that we have more in common that I thought.
It’s not you and me.
It’s us. Together.
We’re really all the same.
May 5, 2018
ABIA Small Publisher’s Children’s book of the year.
It was on a warm May night in Sydney when Andy and I attended the Australian Book Industry Awards (ABIAS) with my Publisher, Big Sky Publishing to find out if It’s Ok to Feel The Way You Do would win Small Publisher’s Children’s Book of the Year.
And it did.
Here’s the incredible moment in pictures.
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At the podium doing my speech thing… nervous as hell!
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They whisk you out the back to the red carpet for photos and interviews.
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Me with my publisher and commissioning editor Diane Evans from Big Sky Publishing.
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Me with my partner Andy Macleod.
I’m confident now that the win will give the book greater exposure and go on to affect more kid’s lives in a positive way. I was lucky enough to meet the General Manager of Dymocks Australia and the founder and owner of Booktopia and explain to them why the book is so important, which puts it (along with Being You is Enough) in a good spot to get more shelf space and exposure.
I cannot thank Andy and Big Sky Publishing enough on supporting me with the book and the incredible win. It’s a wonderful achievement.
Read more about It’s OK to Feel The Way You Do
Something wonderful happened
It was on a warm May night in Sydney when Andy and I attended the Australian Book Industry Awards (ABIAS) with my Publisher, Big Sky Publishing to find out if It’s Ok to Feel The Way You Do would win Small Publisher’s Children’s Book of the Year.
And it did.
Here’s the incredible moment in pictures.
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At the podium doing my speech thing… nervous as hell!
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They whisk you out the back to the red carpet for photos and interviews.
[image error]
Me with my publisher and commissioning editor Diane Evans from Big Sky Publishing.
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Me with my partner Andy Macleod.
I’m confident now that the win will give the book greater exposure and go on to affect more kid’s lives in a positive way. I was lucky enough to meet the General Manager of Dymocks Australia and the founder and owner of Booktopia and explain to them why the book is so important, which puts it (along with Being You is Enough) in a good spot to get more shelf space and exposure.
I cannot thank Andy and Big Sky Publishing enough on supporting me with the book and the incredible win. It’s a wonderful achievement.
Read more about It’s OK to Feel The Way You Do
April 29, 2018
April 2018 Wrap Up
It takes a village to raise a child and it also takes one to bring a book to life.. Thanks to Woodslane for all their support.
Can you believe that tomorrow is the first day of May? I mean how have we already gone through four months of the year already? Before we know it, we will be celebrating Christmas again.
April has been a great month for Woodslane. With so many new and great books coming into the warehouse which we have been working hard to get out to all of you.
I thought I would do a little recap of some of the books we have recently featured on some of our social media pages.
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April 15, 2018
The last 50 cents to my name
It was one of those stifling hot Perth summer mornings, where it was already 30 degrees by 8.30. I’d spent the last 50 cents to my name on a bus ticket to the city to lodge my fortnightly unemployment form. I then sweated my way around the shops asking if anyone had a job available and ended up at Royal Perth Hospital because I knew there was a drinking fountain where I could get a glass of water. Now without any money, I had to return home before the two hour time limit was up on my bus ticket.
I was living at my Dad’s house which didn’t have air conditioning, nor food as he preferred to spend most of his time at his girlfriend’s place and invest his time and money there. I was 19, unemployed and at one of the lowest points in my life.
However, there was no intervention, no great miracle occurred, no-one rescued me, no great insight realised.
I just kept going. I pushed through.
I waited out for the dole payment to come though. I took walks to the nearby lake, I watched horrible day time TV and found old bits of cheese and pasta in the fridge to eat (I think that’s where my obsession with pasta started…. it’s a physiological link to survival)
The money eventually came through, I eventually found a job, I eventually moved out and I was eventually able to look after myself.
I kept going.
Even though I wished someone would swoop down and rescue me, I sort of knew that wasn’t going to happen and it was up to me to do something. I always had to do something to improve my situation and once I did, things would start to fall into place.
I’ve learnt that you have to do something. You have to move. You have to push through and keep going.
You may not have the foggiest clue as to where you are headed but taking one step in any direction is better than none.
When you take that step, then take the next and then the next and in the words of Copyblogger founder, Brian Clark – Keep going.
You never know what adventures you’ll have…
Take your ideas out of your head
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Take your ideas out of your head and do something with them.
Take out a sketch book and sketch.
Open up a notebook and jot down notes.
Take your phone out and take photos.
Don’t be afraid to be the quirky one hiding in the shrubbery at a Mozart recital sketching the Cellist. (like this lady)
Bring your creativity and art into the everyday. Life becomes a lot more fun then.
April 4, 2018
Fairview Primary School Visit
I had an absolutely fantastic day chatting to the kids at Fairview Primary School back in March. Not only did we talk about all the important things like ‘Even cool kids have to Poo’, I also got to address the entire school and parents at the assembly and local TV Station GWN came down to film on the day.
It’s really amazing when a school and P and C come together to make something wonderful happen and I’m sure the kids took something important away from the event.
If any other schools wish to have an incursion I can be contacted directly josh@outsidecreative.com.au
March 27, 2018
Live an uncomplicated life
Feel free to share with friends or print off and stick on the fridge. It’s a nice reminder to have close by
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