Akosua Dardaine Edwards's Blog, page 27

Self Acceptance is the recognition that ALL of who you are purposeful, useful.

  We think we, and life, are supposed to be neat and tidy, organized and ready for the photo-op. We think the sign of readiness is a lack of tangle, a lack of messiness. We assume we’re the messed up ones if our behind-the-scenes secrets and processes and next steps don’t look as clear-cut and set in stone as they seem to for “everyone else” .Living is important; living isn’t neat. Lisa Olivera

Self Acceptance is the recognition that ALL of who you are is purposeful, useful.

Self acceptance is a remembering that you start off as Divine, a manifestation of the Most High.

Self Acceptance is holding yourself accountable & responsible for your every thought, word & deed. The elimination of outsourcing blame to anything & anyone external to you because although there are situations that may be out of your control, you have the power to respond.

Self acceptance is remembering that you have innate power, taking it back and living your life minus self judgement, denials, untruths and victimhood.

Self Acceptance is the knowing that you can take responsibility for your life, your choices...no matter what.

Self acceptance is knowing that you can always choose to stand tall

Peace

What do you think your power of choice is dependent on?

 

What do you think your power of choice isdependent on? Carolyn Myss 

Over the past few months, I have been reading about how we see ourselves in the world.  Many of us have been taught that power comes from what we have, what we earn, where we live and who we know, what relationships we have and hold. All of which are external and fleeting. There is a line in Bob Marley's song "don't gain the world and lose your soul, wisdom is better than silver and gold" which comes to mind. We look towards gaining so much that is outside of ourselves that we lose ourselves.

Today, we can live one place, and tomorrow its gone.  Today we can have a particular job, tomorrow its gone- does that mean that we have lost power to live, to choose, to move forward? For women in particular, there is a belief that our status and power comes from attracting the right partner, keeping them for a ling time and getting married.

Our power comes from within. There is a level of confidence, guidance and peace that can only come from inside of us. When we can consistently believe and tap into that innate power we will look towards the externals as icing on the cake.

Why do we choose to stay in situations that we know are unhealthy? Many times we forget, ignore, don't know that there is something inside of us, call it what you wish, that guides us. There is a part of us which can pull or even push out of where we are. It starts with you, making that choice.

If we are looking at love, is there only one way or source of love? 

Is there one job, or source of income?

Is there one place to live?

When we believe that we cannot move, change, shift, because of fear of the unknown we have given away or forgotten the power within us.

Some of us don't even know that our power resides with us exists. We look for guarantees, certainty, logic, an example,. Does it make sense? Innate power  never speaks loud, makes logical sense or asks for permission. This is where trust and faith comes in.

Take your power back.

Go within.

Peace

Akosua's Books

Nyabo (Madam) Why Are You Here?

Now What? The Flipside

What Did I Learn Today? Lessons on the Journey to Unconditional Self Love

Lessons on Building a Soul Mosaic

 That which fills us will radiate from uswithout effort right in the place in life where we stand. Emily Cady

Over the past few days I have been travelling through Cost Rica. It was the first visit, I pray not the last. I loved the combination of nature and city life, a harmonious balance of having green space in the middle of everything.

The streets were lined pink poui trees which were all in full bloom, making a pink carpet on the pavements and roadways. I marveled at it all.

These are my top ten lessons on the Journey :

Day 1. There are not separate truths for different areas of your life. You don’t have personal life, a professional life, a spiritual life, a political life, a romantic life,  you have one life and you take you with you wherever you go. 

Day 2: allow yourself to be where you are

Day 3:  Patching back your soul into the beautiful mosaic it is takes time, remembering who you are and falling back in love with yourself.

Day 4: there is nothing passive about faith. Expressing faith is  not sitting back and doing nothing. Oh No! It takes all of your energy, all of your focus, all of your attention, all of your love, all of your courage, all of your strength..there is nothing

 passive about faith 

Day 5: All things mature and materialise on time and in time according to their own nature. 

Day 6: you cannot learn about yourself if you are always staying within the safe confines and borders if the familiar . You must step into unknown worlds

Day 7: allow yourself to go through what you must go through so that you can put a vibration out in the Universe of transcendence of overcoming, of victory. You cannot have a victory if you are running away from what you think is  too big or too much for you to handle. The victory comes when you are present.

Day 8: to respect is to do things that honor. When you respect something, you are not just going through the motions; you are considering how your actions and activities are impacting the long term relationship between you and what you respect. When you respect something, you hold it in esteem that keeps its preciousness and its importance in the forefront of your mind

Day 9: Intuition and intellect are meant to travel together, intuition always holding the reins to guide intellect. "Come now, and let us reason and season together,

Day 10: There is an order in everything.

Peace and Blessings

Akosua's Books

Nyabo (Madam) Why Are You Here?

Now What? The Flipside

What Did I Learn Today? Lessons on the Journey to Unconditional Self Love

I Shall Not Be Moved

However I am perceived and deceived, however my ignorance and conceits,
lay aside your fears that I will be undone,for I shall not be moved. Maya Angelou

I consider Maya Angelou to be one of my famous aunties - you know the type that you never met, but you just know they are your aunty, and the advice they are giving out is really for you?Well.... this is how I thought of Ms. Maya Angelou having received from my grandmother at the age of 13, Ms. Angelou's books and was told to read them during the day when granny went to work.There and then I declared her Aunty Maya.On her birthday, I read or listen to her interviews, to remind myself that there are great teachers and leaders out there who share their gift willingly with the world.Today, as part of my celebration of Aunty Maya's birthday I want to share with you my top 5 lessons from her life and work
1. Say Thank You - in the midst of a storm, even while bawling your eyes out, stop and say Thank you because there is  a rainbow coming soon, a blessing and a lesson
2. Forgive and Release - let it go, that may not mean ever inviting them to your house or ever speaking to them again, it means setting yourself free of the past. It's done
3. Have courage and practice it - start small and build yourself up. Courage is the greatest of all virtues.
4. Have a place inside of you - for you- that no one can cross, no one can disrespect. And if they come close tell them or show them "back up" - this is my sacred space
5. Love, not mush or sentimentality will save you - Always
Happy Birthday Aunty Maya
Peace

Akosua's Books

Nyabo (Madam) Why Are You Here?

Now What? The Flipside

What Did I Learn Today? Lessons on the Journey to Unconditional Self Love

Your Mind is a Powerful Tool of Creation

 Themoment in front of you is not bothering you. You are bothering yourself aboutthe moment in front of you. Michael Singer

Over the past week I have been paying attention to the self talk and thoughts that surface. It has been an amazing realization to me what I think about, what I tell myself and how I speak to myself.

When I found myself in the endless cycle of thoughts and words that bring me harm I stopped, I said to myself- wow look at that? you are thinking these thoughts again, and saying that to yourself again. These two actions stops the thoughts immediately. I then get the opportunity to pause and start again.  I may have to do it many many times in a day. I have noticed though that when I do pay attention and see or feel the thought coming I can shift quicker.

I firmly believe that thoughts become things and how we speak to ourself opens a pathway for how others speak to us. The famous line "what were you thinking?" bares out in our actions, in our daily living.

We are so powerful. What we focus on in our minds consciously or unconsciously will inevitably become a  lived experience.

When I notice myself thinking thoughts that are not only unproductive but harmful, it impacts on how I show up, on how I respond and of course on how I feel.

The practice has also been when I pay attention and pause, I can focus on the thoughts which can create the life I DO want to live. I shift to thinking about the visions, goals and feelings that I want to cultivate in my own life. It is a practice. When I slip back into the habits of unconscious thoughts, my life reflects the unconscious results.

Confessions on the Journey - this process has not been for the faint of heart. It has required me to be disciplined, to forgive myself and others, to accept what is and to let go. 

There were times when I felt angry and frustrated because I wanted to act on the thoughts in my head, I wanted to make someone pay,  I wanted to change things- all of which I had no control of. I had to feel the feelings, and let it go. I had to forgive myself and the other party, I had to be disciplined not to drive my car directly to them and thump them! 

Your mind is a powerful tool of creation- watch your life and see what you are creating. Life shows us.

Peace 

Akosua's Books

Nyabo (Madam) Why Are You Here?

Now What? The Flipside

What Did I Learn Today? Lessons on the Journey to Unconditional Self Love

April is the Journey to Self Acceptance

 People love to say they can’t afford to feel their emotions because it will take over their whole day and they have stuff to do..Whole time those emotions are coming out elsewhere including irritability, headaches, irritable bowels, sleep problems, appetite changes etc. Feel the feelings people! Nicole Lewis 

Hey April, I’m here for:

-  Movements from love, rather than fear

-  Movements from compassion, rather than judgement

-  Movements out in nature

- Movements with less chocolate.nah, scrap that!

- Movements from a space of abundance in thought, word, deed.

- Movements to different countries.

-Movements with discipline.

-Healthy movements

-Fun movements

- Movements, always with gratitude & self-acceptance.

I’m ready.let’s move!

Peace

5 Lessons Learned on the Journey to Patience

March is drawing to a close, the Journey to Patience has been one of both revelations and frustration.

Revelation due to the new  insights that I now have on what and how important patience is in any growth and healing process. Frustrating because, I confess, I love being in control and now more realizing that I have little control over things outside of myself. I also love what I want, when I want it. When I was in the corporate world , I was rewarded for persistence and finding a way. As I journey on, the lessons reveal that there is a difference between persistence and wanting to control and have things my own way.

Patience is growth and healing tool. It is about seeing the grace placed in front of you as you navigate through your life.

Here are my top five lessons on the Journey to Patience

 1. Patience is more than waiting. Patience is a journey of trust in yourself and trust in the process. Patience reflects how much faith and inner knowing you carry.

2. Patience is about HOW you wait. Are you waiting with a calm mindset or are you in fear and doubt. Calm reflects to the Universe that you are trusting with a level of faith that things will work out even if they look different to how you imagined it to be. Fear and doubt are like you pulling out the seeds planted just to see if they are still growing. 

3. When we make choices from a space of patience, it makes a difference. The choice reflects back to us our faith and we rest assured that all will be ok no matter what happens.

4. Personal transformation and big dreams requires patience.

5. Personal change cannot be accomplished by technology. It requires commitment, persistence, determination and PATIENCE!

When patience is in short supply, get to a point of acceptance.

Peace

Akosua's Books

Nyabo (Madam) Why Are You Here?

Now What? The Flipside

What Did I Learn Today? Lessons on the Journey to Unconditional Self Love

We are Powerful and Worthy

 So, I hope you will allow your life to be bigger than you ever thought it could be. I hope you will wipe the mental slate clean and begin again with the truth of who you are today and all that you hope to be tomorrow - Brianna West

I had a moment where the penny dropped today - what if its my mind that is holding me back? What if it is what I telling myself or not telling myself. What if its my own self talk that is holding me in this place where I am out of flow?

Now, I must confess, it is difficult to admit to myself that I am standing in my own way. It, however is the starting point of a willingness to do something different and see a different perspective.

What and how we been speaking to ourselves and thinking about ourselves?

Our minds are so powerful, think about it, something comes up that is not even real and we give it life by a thought, it can impact the way we feel.

When I believe that I am in danger, my belly starts flipping- it does not even have to be real! I only have to think that I am and there I go, belly hurts, head hurts. When I realise that I am not in danger, I now have to calm down. This is how powerful our minds are

So what if we use the power of our minds, the power of our thoughts to think ourselves into different and bigger possibilities? To remember who we are - valuable beings with nothing to do to prove how valuable and worthy we are.

I sometimes in moments of fear, forget my value and worthiness and start bargaining for it, I start looking for it outside of myself with people, jobs, and externals. Then life reminds me, sometimes with a shove, that there is no need to prove to anyone nor bargain your value and worth. Change the way you think, how you talk to yourself to center you, to return to who you are.

Let us remember that we are powerful and worthy, we start there- Always.

Peace

Akosua's Books

Nyabo (Madam) Why Are You Here?

Now What? The Flipside

What Did I Learn Today? Lessons on the Journey to Unconditional Self Love

Silent Movements

 When we stop trying to rid ourselves of the harder parts of being human we can begin integrating those parts. When we integrate all parts of who we are, we give ourselves the opportunity to honour the full wide, vast spectrum of what it means to be a person. When we do this we also create more access to the beautiful magical parts, too. Lisa Olivera

Silent movements to enhance our consciousness and prepare  us for what we will inevitably encounter on our journey, I have learnt is different to silent movements done in fear and in shame.  

Silent movements to enhance our consciousness comes with a level of peace - a peace that passes all understanding. There is no need to prove, to explain, to question, to gain validation. It simply is a knowing that this silent time, whether challenging or not, that is  supporting us in creating the life that we want to live.

Sometimes we have to make silent movements for our health, our well-being, or reset. Sometimes we have to make silent movements to leave a toxic or unhealthy situation, to regain confidence, to sit alone with our thoughts. When this is the case, life will lead you towards silent moments. It is up to us to pay attention. When we don't chances are life will remind you again and the consequences may be higher. How many stories have you heard about people being stopped in their tracks by a life altering situation - be it a job coming to an end abruptly, a health issue, a relationship challenge- all of it designed for you to pay attention, to ask yourself- is it time for a silent movement?

Silent movements done in fear and shame looks like hiding, lying, justifying, making excuses, rationalizing what you do when someone learns about what you are doing, justifying nonsense, and a repeat of the lessons until they have been learnt.

Silent movements done in fear and shame brings a level of turmoil and torment because we are leaking power, ignoring our intuition and looking outside of ourselves for validation.

In the world we now live in, moving in silence to enhance your consciousness is frowned upon. We want to be seen, to be heard, for our voice to a part of the conversation. Do not be afraid to move in silence for a while, do not be afraid to make moves in silence - I always use the example of the sun and the moon - silent yet powerful. Always right on time and doing its thing!

When your consciousness is elevated there is less of a need to do things in fear and in shame. 

When your consciousness is elevated, we move in love, in honor, with pride in ourselves

When your consciousness is elevated, you pause before you act, you think about the consequences of your actions to the whole, you allow your intuition to guide, rather than your selfish needs and wants.

Silent movements to raise your consciousness, allow us to spend time with ourselves minus the distractions. In that space there is an opportunity to see ourselves, wholly, holy and true. Sit in the discomfort and celebrate the small wins.

Start small, sit with yourself in silence for ten minutes. See what happens. I guarantee you, the downloads will be life changing.

Peace

Akosua's Books

Nyabo (Madam) Why Are You Here?

Now What? The Flipside

What Did I Learn Today? Lessons on the Journey to Unconditional Self Love

We may not like the choices that we have, but we do get to choose

 

We may not like the choices that we have, but we do get to choose. Yves Daly Ward

I started meditating while I lived in Uganda. I just wanted to feel better, feel better about myself, where I was and where I was going. Confessions - it was in a moment of desperation.

Previously I was not a fan of meditating, too many thoughts would come into my mind and I would not know what to do with them.  I felt uncomfortable. I would talk to myself in the middle of the process- am I doing it right?, how much longer? I feel hungry. Anything that came up in my mind I latched on, held on to and analyzed. In the end because I could not "control the process" I deemed it to be a waste of time.  I earnt that when I cannot control a process, I get scared, I do whatever it is to control it. When I cannot, I feel like a failure.  Huge lesson is- I cannot control everything and I am not a failure.

I believed that I  was either meditating wrongly, or it was a waste of time. Until that day I decided to leave the thoughts alone. I remember sitting at the table where I would usually sit to meditate and the thoughts came up and I said to them "here you come again, pass me by please" the moment I said that, everything just got darker, more quiet and I felt an ease that I could not explain. The thoughts were coming up and whizzing by. I started to cry because I felt so peaceful in that dark place. Dark meaning that my eyes were closed I could not see what was going on, yet it felt safe. 

The following day I wanted to recreated the experience, I sat at the table, started, the thoughts came up, I said to them - hey, pass through. No tears, nothing. I panicked. Opened my eyes and it came to me:

Every experience is unique, wanting it to be the same is a form of control. Let every experience unfold and surprise you. Life delights in surprises.

I closed my eyes and began the process again. The thoughts were there however I realised that I had the opportunity to choose how I engaged with the thoughts as they came up. I realised that there is no right or wrong way to do this and its an opportunity to learn how to chose which thoughts I engage with. Many times we engage with thoughts that are stories, that harm us, that are unhelpful - that starts a loop and we end up feeling powerless and taking actions that are not in our best interests.

Meditation taught me that I get to choose what thoughts I want to engage in, it also taught me that there is no right or wrong way to meditate. It also taught me to recognise when I  am investing in self sabotaging thoughts, those that do not support me.  Thoughts come up all the time, I have the choice on engaging them or letting them pass through.

The thoughts come up and the cycle start, I catch it and say "oh, its you again!, Look at me thinking about this,  how interesting, what is another thought inside there that is more productive" I practice it.

Especially when I am going through a rough time. This is when I need to practice it the most. Recognizing the thoughts that are fueling my feelings of unworthiness or making up stories. 

The recognition of what I am thinking, speaking to it and affirming to myself that I can make a choice to change my thoughts, and love myself through it all.

I use a line from Chaka Khan's song "Do you love what you feel" If I love what I feel, I go with it. Brings a song I like into my head, that also shifts the thoughts

Peace 

Akosua's Books

Nyabo (Madam) Why Are You Here?

Now What? The Flipside

What Did I Learn Today? Lessons on the Journey to Unconditional Self Love